Part 14

She took a steadying breath, sucked in all the resolve and patience available to her, and turned.

InuYasha hadn't moved an inch. He was still standing near the edge of the clearing, the morning sun casting a peaceful facade over the imminent scene about to be played. She was not about to leave the well without him, there was too much at stake. He was just dangerous enough to do something drastic and unnecessary.

"So." Kagome came away from the wooden rim, loath to leave but realizing she had no choice. "Lets go get the rest of the Jewel." She walked right up to him, waited while he continued to concentrate on the well, and finally cleared her throat to gain his attention.

When he looked at her, InuYasha saw everything good that had ever happened to him. She was the personification of his hope, his ultimate dreams, but she wasn't really his anymore. Kagome was now some other male's, that Hojo boy, and it was like a dull knife cutting him in two. She was here only to prevent him from destroying her future, a future which may not include him anymore.

His eyes shifted back to the well behind her. "I should destroy it now," he mumbled, ignoring the sharp intake of breath that signaled she'd heard.

"I'll leave, InuYasha. So don't even threaten it," Kagome wasn't about to touch him, but Kami help her if he even took one step towards the well. She'd fight him tooth and nail to protect her home. "It'll be better for everyone to finish the Jewel and let us all get on with our lives."

"No."

Her brows creased at this expressionless, emotionless response. "No? You don't want the Shikon-no-Tama anymore then?" There was a hint of sarcasm in her tone and it drew his gaze to her again. Though his face was blank, as perfectly neutral as the best of SesshouMaru's indifference, InuYasha's eyes told a different story altogether.

Emotion swirled in the amber depths. Hate and love were evident, but it was the internal struggle that seemed to keep him on the verge of a rage so deep and dark, that Kagome stepped away. He caught her in a firm grip before she'd moved to far off, pulling her flush against his body, InuYasha barely glanced at her before taking flight in the next moment.

He flew blind, making daring and dangerous swoops just to feel her grasp onto him in fright... just so he could hold her tighter. The landscape was a blur beneath and around them, isolating the two from this world, as he took her far from the only known portal to her world.

Kagome held tight, her heart trusting he wouldn't hurt her, wouldn't let her fall to a painful death below. She trusted he would contain his anger and land so they could talk like normal beings. A long reaching branch strayed close to her cheek as InuYasha took them into the forest again and she buried her face into his shoulder to escape any other near foliage.

He chose a quiet looking glade to land in, and stood for a moment after the world had stopped moving, just holding his precious burden as a drowning man would a lifeline. The heat he felt from watching that boy from her world kiss her began to dissipate. He wasn't here now, couldn't take what he had no way of finding, and InuYasha hugged her tighter. She would probably never want to see him again, let alone touch him after he destroyed the well. There was no other course of action in the half-demon's mind. He had to protect what was his.

"So this is what it feels like to be Kikyo," Kagome said at length. She pulled away from InuYasha, studiously avoiding his gaze so as not to see any hurt she might have caused him. It wouldn't do to give him a chance to turn her heart.

"I don't think she feels," he turned to survey their surroundings for danger, overly aware of the girl next to him and of his own heightened senses. "She's dead, Kagome."

Shrugging her shoulders, she turned to face him. "Does that matter? Her death makes her immortal, demonic if you will. Just what you always wanted."

"You're one to talk."

She snorted daintily at the comment then came to stand directly in front of him. "I'm one to talk? You're the two-timer, not me!"

"And what do you call kissing that boy?"

"I call it showing someone how I feel," she practically yelled. "Emphasis on the 'someone' part, InuYasha."

Kagome wanted to stalk and sulk. She went to turn from him, maybe make a quick circuit of the glade, but his firm hand on her arm brought the girl up short. Ready for him to take flight again, Kagome relaxed her body so that she wouldn't get dropped. Instead, InuYasha pulled her back into a solid yet gentle embrace. She let her head rest on his shoulder, realizing the tactic he was using, but needing his touch too much to care. Maybe she had let Hojo close to her for this; maybe it was her subconscious showing her the way to get InuYasha's attention was by actively seeking someone else; or maybe she was just too tired to care either way.

He inhaled her scent and let the silence infuse his soul. He cupped her to him, letting his anger calm and her words die out on the breeze. "I can't give you what you want," he said at last, tightening his hold on her when Kagome began to move away.

"I don't have those types of feelings in me anymore, Kagome. It's just not possible for me anymore."

He let her raise her head and look him in the eye. She could see the way his expression begged her to understand, to be the person he knew she was and to forgive his weakness. It just didn't make sense, though.

"Why does Hojo matter to you then?"

He cringed from the question, had known it was coming, but withdrew just the same. As she slipped from his arms, InuYasha repeated the answer over and over in his mind, but just one look at her brought back an image of them, her and Hojo, and he couldn't say it.

Kagome could tell the instant he went from stalling to answer, to not considering it anymore. Sighing, she began to realize he'd have to trust himself again before he could trust her, especially with something as important as his heart. The problem was his immortality. She would eventually die whereas he would grow eternal. Kagome just couldn't wait that long.

"Take us back to Kaede's, InuYasha. We need to get started on the Jewel again."

He nodded absently and went to take her in his arms again. Side-stepping his attempt, Kagome move around behind him to climb on his back. She would speak to Kaede, Miroku, and Sango when they got back to the village, then take Shippou with her as far as the well. She had promised Hojo she'd come back for a bit, which the kitsune cub knew, but still Kagome figured her adopted son would better appreciate knowing when she left this time.

As they ascended above the canopy and headed home, Kagome preoccupied her thoughts with what she would tell Hojo and her apparently worried family about what was going on. She had to be able to continue returning to the past, not only to complete her quest but for Shippou's sake. She refused to break her promise to the cub, even if it meant the awkward meetings with InuYasha would become a constant in her life.