My my my. The poem is ee cummings "gee i like to think of dead" I had hoped maybe someone would at least recognize the style. I'll stick with it for a while since it gets really really good. Of course, ee cummings is one of my favorite borderline sociopath poets ever. I guess an "E" name is good for that thinking of Elizabeth Barrett Browning.

Okay so I don't own Kenshin. And if you are reading this, you probably know who does. Sano Ichiro is not mine. Sano belongs to Laura Joh Rowland, who writes some really excellent diversionary books. Or as I like to call them, my cheesy samurai murder mysteries. She paints a pretty if not accurate picture. And while most of her characters are unfinished, the one that is finished I do not like. That may be why I think she is finished. Either way, check her out at your local bookstore or library.

Hikari belongs to me, and the interpretation of Tokugawa Ieyasu belongs to me too. For the record, since I'm seeing the name pop up more and more: the very literal translation for "Hikari" is "Light." As in a beacon or source of light. Not light as in weight. "Sogasu" is literally translated as "to search", or as part of a name, "one who searches." So, Sogasu Hikari in the very liberal translation is "Lightseeker" or "Seeker of Light." This being one of my favorite images of a person, I have over 14 different names that translate out to the same thing.

The world is developing, I promise. :)

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Kenshin toyed with Hikari's hands, the fingers were long and slim and the nails were short, with perfect little crescent moons in each cuticle. He turned her hands over and looked into the palms, thinking about how people said you could see someone's future in the palms of their hands.

Her wrists were slim and he could see the purple blue of veins under her skin. Her skin was almost pearlescent, and infinitely soft to the touch. He pondered her hands rather than stare down the decision she had just put before him.

"Well?" She said. Her voice barely broke a whisper, and made him think of the sound of the wind through rice paddies. Her voice rippled and swished at once. He pursed his lips together, wanting to not have to make the choice.

Hikari watched Kenshin's fingers as they gripped her hands. His death had brought back his vitality, and his hands, with long fingers and short nails, still felt a little rough with the time he spent with a sword. She liked the roughness of human men. She loved their tiny flaws that only added to their perfection. She inhaled deeply and smelled the same familiar smell of him, sandalwood and sweat, light, and masculine. Unable to resist the urge to do so, she extricated her hands from his and locked her fingers into his hair. The tightening of the strands around the fingers seemed to change the color of them, from flaming orange-ish red to almost blood soaked. She pulled him to her and kissed him. A firm pressing of lip to lip to lip to lip. He wobbled in his surprise, then caught himself without separating them. He rested his hands on the tops of her thighs and leaned into her.

She felt his eyes close, a brushing of lashes against her own. They tickled her cheek, and only provoked her desire to remain close to him. Here, in the place where life separated from death, where the choice of immortality was made. Here he was kissing Justice, and here they were being driven by a base instinct that delved beyond the virtues of men to the primal creation of the world. When light sorted from darkness, when land severed from sea, this urge, this desire for the unification of the half souls of men and women existed. He moved himself closer to her, gripping her shoulders, not willing to break any contact.

She relaxed her fingers in his hair and they dropped to the nape of his neck. She wished somehow she could crawl inside of him, or vice versa, so she could feel him everywhere there was to be felt. He was so much shorter than she that she seemed to almost swallow him as she got to her feet and kept her head dipped so that she could drink from his lips and breath his breath. Her wings enclosed them both, wrapping them in the screen of flame colored feathers in the rosy light of the Dawnspire.

Finally, and irrevocably, she pulled away from him and sat back, a cold fire lit in her gaze, her lips were pink with his kisses and her skin fairly glowed with the heat that had passed between them.

"I'll go with you," he whispered, his voice sounding huskier than he had planned.

She made a sort of face, and nodding, "Well, yeah, now you will."

"What is that supposed to mean," he asked.

"I bet if we went at it right here, I could probably have you talked into doing my laundry and cleaning my bath too, right?"

Kenshin knew what she was thinking. She thought it was the moment of passion that had inspired his decision. Seeing the opportunity, he took it, but she had left so many doors open!

He gripped the hem of her shirt and started to lift it past her hips, his fingers brushing the deliciously bare skin under there. He kissed her right beneath her collarbone and smiled, "I have no problem with doing your laundry. I also have no problem giving you even more reasons to do your laundry."

She laughed a little and gently pushed his hands away, "You are a terrible distraction. And if I weren't so tired, I'd indulge myself in you." She leaned forward and kissed him lightly, "But let's settle the business at hand, then we can play."

He clasped her fingers in his stopping her attempt to shoo him away, "I think I need this," he started, "I think I need to exist for a higher purpose. I think there's a part of me that fears being a faceless part of something to which I don't think I've ever really belonged." He let go of her fingers to place them over her mouth to stop the protest he knew was welling there.

"You can tell me how it is a part of everything and everything is a part of it, but that's not what I mean. If it's so wonderful, Hikari, why aren't you in there? It's not because you aren't a part of it. It's because you're a part of it in a different way. A way that I think suits me better than a blind existence of mindless bliss as an unidentifiable part of something that cannot be contained or defined."

Hikari took his fingers from her lips and nodded quietly, "Then I guess we need to get to the Ancestors."

"I thought you would be pleased," Kenshin said.

Hikari looked at him, catching his gaze and sending his spine rigid. Not because she tried, but because her gaze was so unnatural, and so out of place with such a warm voice and body. Those cold eyes bothered him immensely, especially now, as he looked into them and saw the detached nature, the lack of true involvement with the reality of humanity.

"Kenshin, you are not doing this for my approval or anyone else's. Or at least you shouldn't be," she said.

Kenshin took in a breath, "No. But I would like to know that you are pleased with my decision."

"I would have been pleased with any decision you had made," she said, finally getting to her feet and stretching out her wings, trying to see if she could make it to the Ancestors on what little energy she had been able to garner.

Kenshin looked at her confused, until he listened to her, she would have been pleased with him no matter what he decided. All she wanted was his happiness.

She gave a few test flaps, stirring up a breeze in the stillness of this gray place, and looked at him, "I should be able to make it just fine. You ready?"

He nodded and the pair left the balcony of the Dawnspire behind them, the gray mists closing in over distant forms as they made their way to the Ancestors.

The Ancestral lands from up high looked very much like the world he had left. Except that beside the palace where Hikari was getting ready to land, stood a massive European castle, a dark and foreboding shadow over the bright and clean palace.

Hikari was out of breath when she landed, and held up her hand to the guard to wait until she could catch her breath. The trip had been tiring for her, on the very edge of her energies.

Kenshin landed beside her and waited, knowing better than to offer her help. After a couple of seconds she inhaled deeply and straightened to look at the guards. "I apologize. It's been a very long journey. Ieyasu-sama is expecting me."

One of the guards was still looking at her in wonderment, and Kenshin heard her thinking he must be newly deceased. That same guard looked back at her and said, "Who am I to tell him is calling?"

The second guard, more seasoned and familiar with the workings of this side of the world gaped at his companion in surprise. He started to answer, "You don't ask her…"

"Sogasu Hikari, or Cairys, or Justice, whichever, really. I'm not particular," Hikari interrupted, hoping to save the guard a little embarrassment.

"You don't ask a Kami which Kami he or she is, you idiot," he said once Hikari had finished explaining herself, "You're lucky she doesn't strike you down for questioning her."

Hikari rolled her eyes, and Kenshin dipped his head to hide the smile that was growing as he heard Hikari's thoughts. "Why does everyone insist that I strike people down? What did I do to deserve this reputation?"

The guard tried not to cower as Hikari continued, "Go inside and tell Ieyasu to either get out here or let me in."

She had failed to use the honorific, something she usually did, since she found Ieyasu to be a great companion, but not really her superior. Kenshin's shoulders shook with the attempt to contain the laughter, as Hikari's thoughts were completely different than her words. She almost seemed nervous, a prospect to a man who had seen her as a supremely confident being, seemed truly funny.

She popped Kenshin on the shoulder, "Shut up." Her voice was teasing, masking a smile beneath her serious exterior.

Moments later the guard appeared and led them inside the palace, which was Nijo Castle in its heyday. The gardens were perfectly manicured, the entire castle was in top shape, and samurai stomped around the grounds looking very important.

Hikari sat down inside the entryway and pulled off her boots. Kenshin stepped out of his zori and followed her into the main body of the castle. Almost immediately, the sound of birds seemed to fill the air. Kenshin looked around in wonder, but could not see the birds. Then, something in the back of his mind reminded him that Nijo Castle had a specially constructed floor that made these noises whenever it was walked upon, so as to warn of intruders. The palace itself seemed in a bustle and Kenshin almost lost Hikari a couple of times as she wound around the corridors and in between people. Most people stood aside for her, not necessarily out of respect, but because her wings took up a great deal of space.

She finally rounded a turn and stopped in front of a section of wall that Kenshin saw was a door. She pulled open the painted panel and told him to have a seat in there so that he could watch everything. If Ieyasu asked for him, he could come out of the doors in front of him which led directly into the room.

Kenshin kneeled on the soft pillows and fresh tatami and peered out of the screen into the main audience chamber where Ieyasu and another man were kneeling and waiting for Hikari. Hikari was let into the room and bowed with all the grace of a Japanese Courtier.

"Tokugawa, I apologize for my appearance, and would request some time to clean up before we continue with our business. Though I have come to let you know that all things are arranged and once I feel civilized again, we can begin."

Ieyasu smiled at her, "Not that I don't find your Western appearance charming, but you do look as though you have had a hard time of it. Is he here?"

She nodded.

Ieyasu nodded, "I see. Good. Then by all means, go and rest, and come see me when you are ready. Not here of course."

Hikari nodded her understanding and almost purred, "I look forward to it. And thank you for your hospitality." When she turned she seemed to sweep out of the room, and seconds later, Kenshin heard the door behind him open. Hikari helped him out of the tiny chamber and onto his feet. She kissed him on the cheek and whispered in his ear, "I'll see you soon, I promise. Just enjoy this for now."

Kenshin looked at her strangely but nodded, and followed the boy servants down the corridor.

Hikari followed the maids down the corridor to some quarters where she bathed, got something to eat and drink, and got dressed. She remembered the things Sano had taught her about subtlety and seasons when dressing, and chose kimono in layers of soft lavender and white. Her obi was embroidered with crocuses breaking through the snow to bloom, and the uchikake, or over robe she pulled on had them blossoming from the hem and the bottom of the sleeves. Her hair was tied back simply and her face was left clean. She declined the cosmetics offered, explaining that she was a Kami, and did not have the same rights as the ancestors. She made them feel her equals or superiors, and soon the maids were at ease with her as they discussed what Hikari had learned about Japanese traditions.

Finally, Hikari left to find Ieyasu's private chambers, and after a while, the corridor turned and Hikari found herself staring at a panel. She opened the panel and peered in, seeing Ieyasu seated and leaning on a small table.

"Hikari, please come in," Ieyasu smiled in approval at her appearance, "You look almost authentic. I'm sure the effort will be appreciated."

Hikari kneeled across from him, deciding in her mind that chairs and pillows were by far a better thing than kneeling on floors. Her brow furrowed at his remark, "Will be appreciated, Ieyasu?"

He nodded, "Hai. As much as I would have enjoyed the privilege, I owe it to another more in tune with your mindset to continue this process," he looked at her straight posture, the angling of the kimono layers, in the Heian style, left her neck bare. While he was as interested in chests as any man, he found the neck the more telling feature of a woman's natural grace and internal strength.

"I beg your pardon?" Hikari straightened a little more, the crocus blossoms shifting around her.

"Ichiro is more appropriate for this task, if that suits you."

Hikari thought about it. Sano had been a good friend for a while now, and she enjoyed his company immensely. But the change in plans unsettled her, and she inhaled. Unlike Ieyasu, she was not good at hiding her discomfort. "Considering that I am the one petitioning here, Ieyasu, I will comply with your conditions."

"I have always appreciated your directness and understanding," Ieyasu said, "If you will excuse me." He rose and left the room, leaving Hikari a little knocked off her feet.

The door behind Hikari slid open and shut and she could smell the almond oil that permeated Sano's presence. He knelt behind her and she could feel him bow. "Hikari." He paused, unsure of what suffix to give her. Sama seemed too formal for the situation, dono seemed juvenile.

"Sano-san," she answered, correcting his problem of finding a suffix.

Kenshin had been bathed and fed and generally pampered, much to his discomfort. He curled up against a wall finally alone. Or at least for just an instant. The shoji slid open again and a tall, cowled figure walked into the room and knelt across from him. When the cowl was pushed back, Kenshin was looking at the rich blue skin and green eyes of one of Hikari's servitors. He remembered that the Divine Servitors were those who chose to serve the Kami. Each Kami's servitors looked a great deal alike. The differences were subtle beyond those of gender, if they decided to have a gender. Hikari's were called the Sweeping Wind, he thought. They were all immensely tall, the women averaged seven feet easily, men could be up to nine. They had brilliant blue skin and stark white wings and hair. He understood there was a strategic reason for their coloring, but he couldn't remember what. They never had names, and Kenshin usually found it a challenge to not ask them personal questions, since they didn't have a real sense of person, only the unity they found through their service, their answers could be disturbingly educational.

This one had a gender, female, but she was muscled better than any man Kenshin had seen. Her head was shaved save a topknot of brilliant white hair and she looked down at him from her position, which, if he were standing, she would probably be eye to eye with the tiny Kenshin.

"Yes?" Kenshin asked.

"I'm here to help you. I was asked to make sure your change goes smoothly," she had a voice as slick as ice, and about as warm too.

"Change?" Kenshin asked, sitting up.

She nodded, "Your change into a Kami. You didn't think you were perfect already, did you?" She smiled a little, Hikari's servitors were known for their weird senses of humor.

"Well, I…" He furrowed his brow, confused again, and just when he thought he was getting the hang of it. He thought about Hikari, and tried to feel her thoughts.

Hikari kept her head bowed as Sano shifted her hair to the side to reveal the nape of her neck. Her wings had been tucked away into whatever space they went to. She felt Sano's breath on the back of her neck, "I don't want you to be uncomfortable with this Hikari," he said softly.

She turned to face him, "Not uncomfortable. Just trying to figure out how to not look like a lamb to slaughter. I had expected this to be handled with Ieyasu. An act of affection at best," she turned her head away and down.

Sano tilted his head, surprised at how the mannerisms weren't so different between Western and Eastern women. "Hikari, I didn't mean to throw you off balance. If you wish it, I'll leave and inform Ieyasu."

She looked up and shook her head rapidly, sending ripples of cold shadow over the rich violet of the blooms of her robe. "That's not necessary, Sano," deciding the time for words was past and pointless, she rose on her knees and closed the distance between them.

She was so different from his wife, Sano thought as the heat rose up between them. He tasted the wonder of her kiss and his last thought before slipping under the spell of her was that someone had better appreciate what he had.

It was strangely more passionate than either of them had expected. It was an act of rapid desperation, a need to fulfill. No time was wasted lingering over curves and soft places, enjoying the softness of one another. It seemed more like an interruption in a conversation to take a sip of tea.

Kenshin leaned forward suddenly, feeling flush and dizzy. Her hand touched his arm and whispered comforts that were no more well understood than breezes talking to birds. It wasn't unpleasant, just surprising, the heat within him, the energy seemed to seethe into him in a rush and he gasped in surprise at its strength. He closed his fingers around his head, trying to understand the humming he heard, and jerked suddenly, pulling his hair free to curtain around him.

He only vaguely felt the servitor remove his gi, and the cool of her hands seemed to arouse him only further. Arouse? Yes, that's what this was. It was an intense awakening and arousal within him. He could almost feel hands on him, hot and passionate, tracing searing lines through his flesh.

He closed his eyes, and felt himself soaring above and beyond whatever he had thought or dreamed, and then he dove into the darkness, a flaming star of light shattering the shadows around him.

Hikari felt Kenshin's surprise and exhilaration. She raised her head from the bath and looked at Sano. Fueled by her empathy with him, she pulled Sano to her and onto her. She kissed him warmly, but with a strength that couldn't be put into words. Her wet hands ran up his back, drawing out pink lines for the rivulets of water to fall. He came down on her, unable to resist the primitive nature of her. This was not so much as an interruption in conversation as a second try.

When Kenshin awoke, he was alone in a darkened room. What woke him up was the door sliding aside to let someone in. He blinked in the darkness and asked, "Who's there?"

The lamp on the table was brightened, revealing Hikari, her hair was still damp and clung to her back in rivers of cold shadow that outlined her shape and puddle on the floor behind her. She was wearing kimono, how many Kenshin couldn't tell, but they were closed with a quickly done obi. Her face shone in the light of the candle as she turned to look at him.

She held her breath to keep from gasping. He fairly glowed with the new life within him. His eyes were brilliant, almost violent purple. The amber light of the lamp danced in the depths of them. There was a new softness to his lips and a hardness to his chin. She bit her lower lip as her gaze continued over the strong and delicate body. She raised her gaze to his again and blinked at him.

He just couldn't find the words. Something had happened to him. It was the most something that had ever happened to him. He wasn't sure what it was the most of yet. He tried to get to his feet and promptly lost his balance and fell back hard on feathers and bone.

"Suppose I ought to explain about that," she tipped her head sort of over his shoulder as he tried to stand up again, and felt a heaviness at his back. He turned his head, and then his body, and then walked in a couple of circles before grabbing one of the wings and pulling it around to his vision. He looked at her as he held onto the top of his wing.

"Well how did you think you were going to get around?" Oh she loved those wings. They were such subtle shades of purple and gray and gold, like a sunset, everything blending into everything else.

His face softened suddenly, a strangely benevolent act that left him looking most saintly and seductive. When he spoke, it was as if the crickets in the garden outside quieted to listen to the soothing of his voice, "Somehow, Hikari, I thought Redemption would walk."