Blurry 10/?
Author: Amanda
Summary:
Rating: PG-13, for now
Disclaimers: Not mine, it's all Joss'.
Feedback: All feedback is read, cherished and given a good home.
Distribution: Please ask.
*************
Buffy smoothed the dress down over her hips and looked up at the doors in front of her.
In there lay danger. Danger that she was not prepared to cope with. At one time she
would have loved to sit down in a fancy restaurant and use the correct fork. She had even
thought she would fit in there. But that was when she still lived in a fairy tale world. She
could face demons, save the world a few times, but she still cowered in the face of a
maitre d' that spoke in haughty foreign tones. It was now or never though. Ignoring the
looks of the teenage valets, she pushed the door open. She didn't know if they were
looking at her because she had walked or if it was because she presented a pretty picture.
She hoped it was because she had walked the three miles to the restaurant in her heels
and dress.
It looked like a house from the outside, but inside, the rooms were open. Candles
flickered, lighting the small tables. She could hear the slight background noise of music,
underneath the idle voices. It seemed everyone whispered here, even the staff.
"Can I help you miss?"
"I'm meeting someone. Rupert Giles. There should be a reservation."
His eyes raked over her. She wondered if she passed inspection? And if not, what would
they do to her? Would she have to go to some etiquette school? She thought she looked
appropriate. She had even popped into the Pizza Palace down the street to check and
repair any damage. She must have passed muster as he motioned for her to follow. She
wished Dawn hadn't backed out at the last minute. At least then, she could have had
someone beside her. She had even protested against this restaurant when Giles had
suggested it. But he had said she deserved to go someplace nice to post celebrate her
birthday. And she'd given in.
"Buffy, I'm glad you're here."
She sank down into the seat the maitre d' had pulled out for her and looked Giles over.
This wasn't Giles. At least not her Giles. Not her watcher Giles. Watcher Giles wore
tweed suits. No, this had to be an imposter. This was someone that she had never seen
before. His glasses were present, but his silk shirt was open at the throat, and he had an
earring. An earring! Someone had kidnapped Giles and replaced him with an imposter.
"Are you okay? You look a little…." Buffy fumbled for words, but couldn't find any.
She was glad when he filled in for her.
"Different?"
"I guess different would work."
"I wear something besides tweed on occasion."
"And the earring?"
"I've always had an earring."
"I don't think I've ever seen you wear it before? Are you sure you're Giles?"
"I am Giles, just a more progressive Giles."
She didn't know what to say to that. What do you say to someone who has radically
changed his appearance? It shocked her. She didn't think she could be anymore
surprised. Well maybe if Spike stopped dying his hair, but it would be a close call.
"Dawn backed out, said she had homework."
"Actually, I asked Dawn not to come. I told her I'd take her shopping for her birthday."
Giles asked Dawn to back out. Giles was dressing younger. She was getting a little
scared. Then she noticed that there was an empty chair. Maybe he had met someone and
wanted to introduce them. That made her feel so much better. "Then who else is
coming?"
"I wasn't entirely truthful with you Buffy. This is to celebrate your birthday. But I also
wanted to talk to you about a job offer. And our other guest is here now."
Her gaze switched from Giles to where his eyes were focused behind her head. She
hadn't noticed she was standing up, until their guest pushed her back into her chair. It
was Spike. Spike in black. Spike in black slacks and a black shirt. Spike who was all
dressed up and looking very un-Spike like. She checked his hair real quick. Yes, it was
still bleached. She wasn't sure she could have taken if it wasn't.
"Rupert. You didn't say we'd be having anyone joining us."
"What's the meaning of this Giles?" Okay, that came a little harsher than she'd intended.
"Spike." He looked at her with the mention of his name. "It's Spike." She said lamely.
If she'd known he was going to show up she might have worn something different, maybe
not something quite as conservative as the black dress she had chosen.
Spike hadn't expected anyone else. But he should have been more suspicious when Giles
had suggested this place. But with his questioning, he had been told it was on the
council's tab. And he had accepted it. Would he have come if he had known she would
be here? Would she have? With the looks she was shooting him, he figured she might
have. But himself, he didn't know.
He was still confused over last night and he didn't want to add any more confusion to
trying to figure out what that was. But it seemed he was going to have to. Buffy threw
him for a loop. And he didn't know how to respond to her. His body knew how to
respond to her though. When she had stood up upon seeing him, fire had shot through
him. He didn't know the last time he had seen her wear a short skirt or a dress. It was
usually pants, or the occasional long skirt. Or it had been nothing for a while. But there
was something about seeing the woman you loved in a short black dress. And while he
didn't know how to react to her or what to say, his body sure did.
"All will be explained in time. First we'll celebrate, then we'll talk"
*************
Buffy had muddled her way through the numerous silverware options, taking her
direction from Spike. How did he know which fork to use? And why could he speak
flawless French? This was a Spike that she didn't know, one that fit in here as easily as
he fit in at a demon bar. And it was one she really wanted to know, if he would let her.
She hoped that he did. Throughout each course, she had merely sat back and listened as
he and Giles had discussed things. The subjects ranged from which wine was better, to
who would win the World Cup. And he had seemed to enjoy himself. He had had a
smile on his face and a light in his eyes. She remembered a time when he had that look
with her. A look of happiness. Until she had turned her back on him and had run out the
door. Now, he looked at her with a face that showed nothing.
"Buffy, are you ready to talk about why we're really here?"
Giles brought her out of her musings. She surveyed them both. Giles looked on edge
and Spike looked a little scared. Like maybe he knew what was coming and he wasn't
sure how she would react.
"Why are we here? And why all this?" She gestured to the restaurant. She couldn't
understand why he had brought her here to discuss something. They could have done it
at her house or at the Magic Shoppe."
"This was a late birthday dinner. And we're discussing job options. Anya told me about
her new venture. And while I don't entirely approve, it probably will be a good
undertaking. But it won't pay all your bills. I want you to hear me out, before you say
no. But I do need an answer tonight. Can you do that?"
"Fine. Talk away."
"The council is willing to pay you a salary. You will also receive medical benefits. In
exchange, weekly encoded reports will need to be sent to them weekly. Reports that will
detail activity here in Sunnydale. It will include what demons you've encountered, any
problems you are facing, how your training is going. Nothing personal. They just want
to keep abreast of what is happening. In return, should you require any help at all, they
will provide it.
"Because they require someone other than you to file the reports, I have asked Spike to
fill that role. If you agree to this, he will fulfill those duties. I have drawn up a contract,
where he will receive forty percent of your salary and you will receive the other sixty.
Any questions so far?"
"So all I have to do is patrol and if I need any help, call the council? And all Spike has to
do is write a few sentences about what my week was like?"
"Not exactly. They'll want details on your nightly patrols, so Spike will need to
accompany you. They'll also want to know how your training is going. They'll require at
least a page worth of detailed information. Spike will type it on a computer located in
Anya's shop, encrypt it, and then email it to the council."
"Does it have to be done at the shop?"
"I don't think a computer would be wise in your crypt."
"I'm not going to be there much longer"
"Where are you going to be? You're not leaving are you?"
Spike could see the panic come over her face. Had it really affected her that much when
he left? Did she really count on him that much? It appeared so, from the way she was
reacting. He had always thought if he picked up and left, she wouldn't notice or care. It
seemed he was wrong. She really meant it when she told him not to leave without saying
goodbye. And if he had any kittens to bet, he'd bet she didn't want him to leave at all.
"No. No, just thinking about renting an apartment."
Giles thought it over. He didn't see why they couldn't set up the computer somewhere
else. It would probably be easier on everyone involved. He could see Spike trying to use
the thing in the middle of the shop and scaring all of Anya's customers away when he
forgot to save and lost his report. In fact, it might be safer for all involved, if the public
was far away from Spike and the computer. "It's possible then, that we could have the
computer set up in your apartment. We would have to make sure that there was the
proper security in place."
This all seemed too easy to Buffy. There had to be a catch somewhere. "So, what you're
saying is, everything stays the same and I just get paid by the council. So Spike patrols,
that's no big deal, he's done it before."
"And they want to know how your training is going and about any research, of course.
That can be accomplished by Spike watching you train and telling you what you're doing
wrong. It would of course be better if you had someone train with you that could match
your strength. But we work with what we can."
"Spike can fight me. I'm sure he won't mind."
"I guess if he doesn't mind getting headaches. But that's entirely up to him."
"You didn't tell him, did you? Did you tell anyone?" He couldn't believe it. He was sure
there had been questions about how he could have hurt Buffy before he left. He would
have thought they would have asked about the chip and she would have told them. And
he would have thought she had learned by now, that she shouldn't keep things from her
friends or her watcher.
"I told Tara."
"Did you learn anything about lying to your friends? I would have thought you would
have told your watcher. He could have looked into it. And I bet you didn't tell him about
when you got shot either, did you?"
"Tara looked into it."
"Well it's nice to know you got some answers, even though I was never clued in. And the
other?"
"They didn't need to know."
"Yes they do. They all need to know. Either you tell them, or I do. It's your choice."
And if there was anything she had learned, he would tell them. He had said he would tell
her friends about the two of them and he had. Of course, he couldn't have picked a worse
time or way to do it. At least this time, there would only be Giles present. But he was
probably right, she should tell them. However, she didn't want to hear all about how she
couldn't trust Spike. He had proved that she could trust him. She trusted him more than
anyone else at the moment and she couldn't lose him from her life. That was the one
thing she was scared of. She'd tell them and then they'd run him off. But if she hadn't
run him off forever, they probably couldn't either.
"Can I have another glass of wine?" At both of their looks, she defended herself.
Obviously no one ever forgot what she was like when she drank. "What? I didn't drive
here. I think I can walk home in one piece." With a roll of his eyes, Spike filled her wine
glass. She took a sip to fortify herself. It really wasn't bad. Much better than whatever
that was she had drunk with Spike. She could get used to drinking this, she thought, as
she took another sip. Squaring her shoulders against the onslaught of questions that were
sure to come, she slowly said, "Spike's chip doesn't work on me."
"It doesn't work anymore?" Giles was alarmed at that. He instantly became alert. And
furious. He couldn't believe that Buffy had kept this from him. He couldn't believe the
danger she had put everyone in. His hand crept towards his pants pocket where he had
hidden a stake.
He should have known she'd bugger it all up Spike thought. At least he was there to
provide the facts. "Oh it still works, it just doesn't work on Buffy. Ever since she came
back. She came back wrong."
"I did not."
"Well you never told me differently, so how was I to know?"
"I came back fine, just a little sun burnt. A molecular sunburn, or something like that is
what Tara said."
"Are you still sun burnt?"
"Huh?"
"Willow brought you back to life again, she could have undone that this time."
"What do you mean Willow brought you back again?"
With Giles' words, they brought their attention back to him. They'd forgotten he was
there. She couldn't believe she had forgotten about Giles. Or the other people in the
restaurant. With Spike, she seemed to have tunnel vision. She noticed him and only him;
everyone else disappeared. But now she was back in reality and she really didn't want to
answer the question that Giles had. "Spike."
"Tell him, or I will. He's your watcher and he needs to know."
"Not anymore. It seems you might hold that position now. Are you up for it? Are you
going to demand to know everything?"
"I already do. And I am not a watcher and I never will be."
He was right. She wasn't sure she liked him being right. He did know everything. Well
pretty much everything. At least he used to. He was the one that understood her, knew
when something was bothering her, and he was the one she had confided in. "Fine.
When Warren shot me, I died. I could have found peace again, but Willow brought me
back to life."
"Maybe it was the doctors." Giles didn't want to believe it was true. And he would have
preferred never knowing.
"It wasn't the doctors Giles. It was Willow. But I don't think she needs to know. She has
enough to deal with right now."
"You're probably right. Buffy, you can't keep these secrets."
"See, someone agrees with me." Spike was smug with the fact that someone agreed with
him. No one ever agreed with him. No ever listened to him.
"Both of you stop. I am trying. I am trying real hard. But I can't just bear everything all
at once. It's just not easy. You didn't change overnight Spike. And neither did you
Giles. You can't expect me to either."
"I know you've been through a lot Buffy, but we can help." Giles wanted to reach out
and help her. It was the same dilemma he'd been in back in the fall. Stay or go. Let her
grow up or stay and take care of her problems. He wanted to help, but he needed to find
a middle ground. And the council's offer was his middle ground. He knew she had
counted on Spike a lot and this way she could rely on him even more. And Spike seemed
to understand that she shouldn't keep things from her friends, because it wouldn't help in
the end. He just might be helping her by leaving her in Spike's hands.
"I have been through a lot and none of you know what that's like. All I can do is promise
to try and share things. But I won't do that, if all I get are friends that won't understand or
support me. I won't go through what I went through earlier."
"What did you go through earlier?"
"Xander."
"Ah. Like you said, a person can't change overnight. Give him time."
"Time? He's had time. He's had six years to see that things aren't always black and
white. He'll forgive Willow. He'll look past her transgressions. But forget anyone else's.
It can't go that way. I won't be judged by my actions, thoughts, or deeds. I'm the slayer
and if something ends up needing to be done, I'll do it. I know my duty, I don't need to
be reminded of it."
"Then accept this offer from the council. It's a one time deal. You know your duty and
you should have all the resources you might ever need available to you. This way you
will."
There still seemed like a catch to her, like she was missing something. "You're not
telling me something Giles. What are you leaving out? Why do you want me to align
myself with the council? And why are you pushing me so hard?"
He had known he would have to tell her. But he had hoped to wait until after she had
signed the paperwork. "They won't help Willow without knowing what is going on in
Sunnydale."
"What do you mean help Willow?" She could hear her voice go sharp. And she could
feel the anger start to build inside.
"The reason we were in London, instead of in Devon where the coven is, is because we
weren't with the coven. We were with the council."
"What do you mean you were with the council?"
"The coven didn't have enough power to deal with Willow. Willow had serious dark
magic running through her. They couldn't bind that, at least not permanently. But the
council could and they did."
"What's the catch?"
"Eventually they'll want to release the bind. Willow is very powerful and they are aware
that having a powerful witch on their side would be a tremendous asset. At some point,
when she's ready, they'll release the bind on her."
"And what if she goes all wacky again?"
"That's a chance they're willing to take."
"And what if I'm not."
"If you don't agree to this, then they'll release the bind right now. Do you want that? Do
you think that is best for Willow?"
"That's why they want the reports, right?"
"Partly. But they are also interested in the hellmouth's activity. This is beneficial to
everyone."
"And you couldn't have mentioned that in the beginning? You lied to me."
"It was for everyone's own good."
"No. It was for yours and Willow's. But what about mine? The only good it does me is
money. Money that I can get elsewhere."
"It allows you access to all kinds of things that you haven't had access to in a long time.
Don't thumb your nose at something you know nothing about. What about those demons
you keep encountering that you can't identify? They can help with that. And with
Spike's help, you'll have his knowledge."
Spike could see the fury in her body. It was funny, she'd lied, but hated anyone lying to
her. She was a mass of contradictions. But Giles was right, she could use the council.
And more importantly, she could use the money. "Buffy. Don't just throw it away."
"Did you know about this?" Because if he had known about all of this, she just might
throttle him. She thought she could trust Spike. That was one thing she depended on.
Just like she depended on being able to tell when he lied to her. And if he had known
about this, she hadn't been able to tell that he knew something he wasn't telling.
"No. Giles just approached me about the job. That's all I knew. They aren't asking for
anything from you. I got your back. They want you, they need you. You will be
controlling them."
Giles felt the need to stick up for Spike. This was getting eerie, how much he was
agreeing with Spike. "He is quite right Buffy."
"You really think I should do this?" She didn't care what Giles thought; she only cared
what Spike thought. And he seemed to want her to do this.
"I do."
"Why?"
"Do you really want to work all day and then fix dinner for Dawn and then when you're
tired, patrol? When will you train? When will you have fun?"
He made a lot of sense. The practical reasons alone might be worth it. "It's not just cause
you want a paycheck?"
"The money's nice, but I don't need it."
"You wanted to get an apartment."
"I could just get a dump off of the salary Anya's paying me, instead of a nicer one that
Dawn could visit. Think of you. Think of the benefits it brings you."
"And you won't tell the council anything I don't want you to?"
"You can read every report before I send it."
She shuddered at that. She didn't want to read boring council reports. If he was getting
paid, he could handle that. "I trust you."
"Then we have a deal? You'll sign the paperwork?" Giles had been worried that she
wouldn't take it. And yes, it benefited her. But in the end, it benefited Willow more.
She needed the council's support and guidance.
"Fine Giles, I'll sign the paperwork. But I have a few changes. Any money Spike makes,
he gets to keep. He doesn't have to return any of it. And if he quits, the whole deals off.
I won't trust anyone else."
"Buffy."
"That's the deal. Take it or leave it. Now what's the salary that I get a portion of?"
Author: Amanda
Summary:
Rating: PG-13, for now
Disclaimers: Not mine, it's all Joss'.
Feedback: All feedback is read, cherished and given a good home.
Distribution: Please ask.
*************
Buffy smoothed the dress down over her hips and looked up at the doors in front of her.
In there lay danger. Danger that she was not prepared to cope with. At one time she
would have loved to sit down in a fancy restaurant and use the correct fork. She had even
thought she would fit in there. But that was when she still lived in a fairy tale world. She
could face demons, save the world a few times, but she still cowered in the face of a
maitre d' that spoke in haughty foreign tones. It was now or never though. Ignoring the
looks of the teenage valets, she pushed the door open. She didn't know if they were
looking at her because she had walked or if it was because she presented a pretty picture.
She hoped it was because she had walked the three miles to the restaurant in her heels
and dress.
It looked like a house from the outside, but inside, the rooms were open. Candles
flickered, lighting the small tables. She could hear the slight background noise of music,
underneath the idle voices. It seemed everyone whispered here, even the staff.
"Can I help you miss?"
"I'm meeting someone. Rupert Giles. There should be a reservation."
His eyes raked over her. She wondered if she passed inspection? And if not, what would
they do to her? Would she have to go to some etiquette school? She thought she looked
appropriate. She had even popped into the Pizza Palace down the street to check and
repair any damage. She must have passed muster as he motioned for her to follow. She
wished Dawn hadn't backed out at the last minute. At least then, she could have had
someone beside her. She had even protested against this restaurant when Giles had
suggested it. But he had said she deserved to go someplace nice to post celebrate her
birthday. And she'd given in.
"Buffy, I'm glad you're here."
She sank down into the seat the maitre d' had pulled out for her and looked Giles over.
This wasn't Giles. At least not her Giles. Not her watcher Giles. Watcher Giles wore
tweed suits. No, this had to be an imposter. This was someone that she had never seen
before. His glasses were present, but his silk shirt was open at the throat, and he had an
earring. An earring! Someone had kidnapped Giles and replaced him with an imposter.
"Are you okay? You look a little…." Buffy fumbled for words, but couldn't find any.
She was glad when he filled in for her.
"Different?"
"I guess different would work."
"I wear something besides tweed on occasion."
"And the earring?"
"I've always had an earring."
"I don't think I've ever seen you wear it before? Are you sure you're Giles?"
"I am Giles, just a more progressive Giles."
She didn't know what to say to that. What do you say to someone who has radically
changed his appearance? It shocked her. She didn't think she could be anymore
surprised. Well maybe if Spike stopped dying his hair, but it would be a close call.
"Dawn backed out, said she had homework."
"Actually, I asked Dawn not to come. I told her I'd take her shopping for her birthday."
Giles asked Dawn to back out. Giles was dressing younger. She was getting a little
scared. Then she noticed that there was an empty chair. Maybe he had met someone and
wanted to introduce them. That made her feel so much better. "Then who else is
coming?"
"I wasn't entirely truthful with you Buffy. This is to celebrate your birthday. But I also
wanted to talk to you about a job offer. And our other guest is here now."
Her gaze switched from Giles to where his eyes were focused behind her head. She
hadn't noticed she was standing up, until their guest pushed her back into her chair. It
was Spike. Spike in black. Spike in black slacks and a black shirt. Spike who was all
dressed up and looking very un-Spike like. She checked his hair real quick. Yes, it was
still bleached. She wasn't sure she could have taken if it wasn't.
"Rupert. You didn't say we'd be having anyone joining us."
"What's the meaning of this Giles?" Okay, that came a little harsher than she'd intended.
"Spike." He looked at her with the mention of his name. "It's Spike." She said lamely.
If she'd known he was going to show up she might have worn something different, maybe
not something quite as conservative as the black dress she had chosen.
Spike hadn't expected anyone else. But he should have been more suspicious when Giles
had suggested this place. But with his questioning, he had been told it was on the
council's tab. And he had accepted it. Would he have come if he had known she would
be here? Would she have? With the looks she was shooting him, he figured she might
have. But himself, he didn't know.
He was still confused over last night and he didn't want to add any more confusion to
trying to figure out what that was. But it seemed he was going to have to. Buffy threw
him for a loop. And he didn't know how to respond to her. His body knew how to
respond to her though. When she had stood up upon seeing him, fire had shot through
him. He didn't know the last time he had seen her wear a short skirt or a dress. It was
usually pants, or the occasional long skirt. Or it had been nothing for a while. But there
was something about seeing the woman you loved in a short black dress. And while he
didn't know how to react to her or what to say, his body sure did.
"All will be explained in time. First we'll celebrate, then we'll talk"
*************
Buffy had muddled her way through the numerous silverware options, taking her
direction from Spike. How did he know which fork to use? And why could he speak
flawless French? This was a Spike that she didn't know, one that fit in here as easily as
he fit in at a demon bar. And it was one she really wanted to know, if he would let her.
She hoped that he did. Throughout each course, she had merely sat back and listened as
he and Giles had discussed things. The subjects ranged from which wine was better, to
who would win the World Cup. And he had seemed to enjoy himself. He had had a
smile on his face and a light in his eyes. She remembered a time when he had that look
with her. A look of happiness. Until she had turned her back on him and had run out the
door. Now, he looked at her with a face that showed nothing.
"Buffy, are you ready to talk about why we're really here?"
Giles brought her out of her musings. She surveyed them both. Giles looked on edge
and Spike looked a little scared. Like maybe he knew what was coming and he wasn't
sure how she would react.
"Why are we here? And why all this?" She gestured to the restaurant. She couldn't
understand why he had brought her here to discuss something. They could have done it
at her house or at the Magic Shoppe."
"This was a late birthday dinner. And we're discussing job options. Anya told me about
her new venture. And while I don't entirely approve, it probably will be a good
undertaking. But it won't pay all your bills. I want you to hear me out, before you say
no. But I do need an answer tonight. Can you do that?"
"Fine. Talk away."
"The council is willing to pay you a salary. You will also receive medical benefits. In
exchange, weekly encoded reports will need to be sent to them weekly. Reports that will
detail activity here in Sunnydale. It will include what demons you've encountered, any
problems you are facing, how your training is going. Nothing personal. They just want
to keep abreast of what is happening. In return, should you require any help at all, they
will provide it.
"Because they require someone other than you to file the reports, I have asked Spike to
fill that role. If you agree to this, he will fulfill those duties. I have drawn up a contract,
where he will receive forty percent of your salary and you will receive the other sixty.
Any questions so far?"
"So all I have to do is patrol and if I need any help, call the council? And all Spike has to
do is write a few sentences about what my week was like?"
"Not exactly. They'll want details on your nightly patrols, so Spike will need to
accompany you. They'll also want to know how your training is going. They'll require at
least a page worth of detailed information. Spike will type it on a computer located in
Anya's shop, encrypt it, and then email it to the council."
"Does it have to be done at the shop?"
"I don't think a computer would be wise in your crypt."
"I'm not going to be there much longer"
"Where are you going to be? You're not leaving are you?"
Spike could see the panic come over her face. Had it really affected her that much when
he left? Did she really count on him that much? It appeared so, from the way she was
reacting. He had always thought if he picked up and left, she wouldn't notice or care. It
seemed he was wrong. She really meant it when she told him not to leave without saying
goodbye. And if he had any kittens to bet, he'd bet she didn't want him to leave at all.
"No. No, just thinking about renting an apartment."
Giles thought it over. He didn't see why they couldn't set up the computer somewhere
else. It would probably be easier on everyone involved. He could see Spike trying to use
the thing in the middle of the shop and scaring all of Anya's customers away when he
forgot to save and lost his report. In fact, it might be safer for all involved, if the public
was far away from Spike and the computer. "It's possible then, that we could have the
computer set up in your apartment. We would have to make sure that there was the
proper security in place."
This all seemed too easy to Buffy. There had to be a catch somewhere. "So, what you're
saying is, everything stays the same and I just get paid by the council. So Spike patrols,
that's no big deal, he's done it before."
"And they want to know how your training is going and about any research, of course.
That can be accomplished by Spike watching you train and telling you what you're doing
wrong. It would of course be better if you had someone train with you that could match
your strength. But we work with what we can."
"Spike can fight me. I'm sure he won't mind."
"I guess if he doesn't mind getting headaches. But that's entirely up to him."
"You didn't tell him, did you? Did you tell anyone?" He couldn't believe it. He was sure
there had been questions about how he could have hurt Buffy before he left. He would
have thought they would have asked about the chip and she would have told them. And
he would have thought she had learned by now, that she shouldn't keep things from her
friends or her watcher.
"I told Tara."
"Did you learn anything about lying to your friends? I would have thought you would
have told your watcher. He could have looked into it. And I bet you didn't tell him about
when you got shot either, did you?"
"Tara looked into it."
"Well it's nice to know you got some answers, even though I was never clued in. And the
other?"
"They didn't need to know."
"Yes they do. They all need to know. Either you tell them, or I do. It's your choice."
And if there was anything she had learned, he would tell them. He had said he would tell
her friends about the two of them and he had. Of course, he couldn't have picked a worse
time or way to do it. At least this time, there would only be Giles present. But he was
probably right, she should tell them. However, she didn't want to hear all about how she
couldn't trust Spike. He had proved that she could trust him. She trusted him more than
anyone else at the moment and she couldn't lose him from her life. That was the one
thing she was scared of. She'd tell them and then they'd run him off. But if she hadn't
run him off forever, they probably couldn't either.
"Can I have another glass of wine?" At both of their looks, she defended herself.
Obviously no one ever forgot what she was like when she drank. "What? I didn't drive
here. I think I can walk home in one piece." With a roll of his eyes, Spike filled her wine
glass. She took a sip to fortify herself. It really wasn't bad. Much better than whatever
that was she had drunk with Spike. She could get used to drinking this, she thought, as
she took another sip. Squaring her shoulders against the onslaught of questions that were
sure to come, she slowly said, "Spike's chip doesn't work on me."
"It doesn't work anymore?" Giles was alarmed at that. He instantly became alert. And
furious. He couldn't believe that Buffy had kept this from him. He couldn't believe the
danger she had put everyone in. His hand crept towards his pants pocket where he had
hidden a stake.
He should have known she'd bugger it all up Spike thought. At least he was there to
provide the facts. "Oh it still works, it just doesn't work on Buffy. Ever since she came
back. She came back wrong."
"I did not."
"Well you never told me differently, so how was I to know?"
"I came back fine, just a little sun burnt. A molecular sunburn, or something like that is
what Tara said."
"Are you still sun burnt?"
"Huh?"
"Willow brought you back to life again, she could have undone that this time."
"What do you mean Willow brought you back again?"
With Giles' words, they brought their attention back to him. They'd forgotten he was
there. She couldn't believe she had forgotten about Giles. Or the other people in the
restaurant. With Spike, she seemed to have tunnel vision. She noticed him and only him;
everyone else disappeared. But now she was back in reality and she really didn't want to
answer the question that Giles had. "Spike."
"Tell him, or I will. He's your watcher and he needs to know."
"Not anymore. It seems you might hold that position now. Are you up for it? Are you
going to demand to know everything?"
"I already do. And I am not a watcher and I never will be."
He was right. She wasn't sure she liked him being right. He did know everything. Well
pretty much everything. At least he used to. He was the one that understood her, knew
when something was bothering her, and he was the one she had confided in. "Fine.
When Warren shot me, I died. I could have found peace again, but Willow brought me
back to life."
"Maybe it was the doctors." Giles didn't want to believe it was true. And he would have
preferred never knowing.
"It wasn't the doctors Giles. It was Willow. But I don't think she needs to know. She has
enough to deal with right now."
"You're probably right. Buffy, you can't keep these secrets."
"See, someone agrees with me." Spike was smug with the fact that someone agreed with
him. No one ever agreed with him. No ever listened to him.
"Both of you stop. I am trying. I am trying real hard. But I can't just bear everything all
at once. It's just not easy. You didn't change overnight Spike. And neither did you
Giles. You can't expect me to either."
"I know you've been through a lot Buffy, but we can help." Giles wanted to reach out
and help her. It was the same dilemma he'd been in back in the fall. Stay or go. Let her
grow up or stay and take care of her problems. He wanted to help, but he needed to find
a middle ground. And the council's offer was his middle ground. He knew she had
counted on Spike a lot and this way she could rely on him even more. And Spike seemed
to understand that she shouldn't keep things from her friends, because it wouldn't help in
the end. He just might be helping her by leaving her in Spike's hands.
"I have been through a lot and none of you know what that's like. All I can do is promise
to try and share things. But I won't do that, if all I get are friends that won't understand or
support me. I won't go through what I went through earlier."
"What did you go through earlier?"
"Xander."
"Ah. Like you said, a person can't change overnight. Give him time."
"Time? He's had time. He's had six years to see that things aren't always black and
white. He'll forgive Willow. He'll look past her transgressions. But forget anyone else's.
It can't go that way. I won't be judged by my actions, thoughts, or deeds. I'm the slayer
and if something ends up needing to be done, I'll do it. I know my duty, I don't need to
be reminded of it."
"Then accept this offer from the council. It's a one time deal. You know your duty and
you should have all the resources you might ever need available to you. This way you
will."
There still seemed like a catch to her, like she was missing something. "You're not
telling me something Giles. What are you leaving out? Why do you want me to align
myself with the council? And why are you pushing me so hard?"
He had known he would have to tell her. But he had hoped to wait until after she had
signed the paperwork. "They won't help Willow without knowing what is going on in
Sunnydale."
"What do you mean help Willow?" She could hear her voice go sharp. And she could
feel the anger start to build inside.
"The reason we were in London, instead of in Devon where the coven is, is because we
weren't with the coven. We were with the council."
"What do you mean you were with the council?"
"The coven didn't have enough power to deal with Willow. Willow had serious dark
magic running through her. They couldn't bind that, at least not permanently. But the
council could and they did."
"What's the catch?"
"Eventually they'll want to release the bind. Willow is very powerful and they are aware
that having a powerful witch on their side would be a tremendous asset. At some point,
when she's ready, they'll release the bind on her."
"And what if she goes all wacky again?"
"That's a chance they're willing to take."
"And what if I'm not."
"If you don't agree to this, then they'll release the bind right now. Do you want that? Do
you think that is best for Willow?"
"That's why they want the reports, right?"
"Partly. But they are also interested in the hellmouth's activity. This is beneficial to
everyone."
"And you couldn't have mentioned that in the beginning? You lied to me."
"It was for everyone's own good."
"No. It was for yours and Willow's. But what about mine? The only good it does me is
money. Money that I can get elsewhere."
"It allows you access to all kinds of things that you haven't had access to in a long time.
Don't thumb your nose at something you know nothing about. What about those demons
you keep encountering that you can't identify? They can help with that. And with
Spike's help, you'll have his knowledge."
Spike could see the fury in her body. It was funny, she'd lied, but hated anyone lying to
her. She was a mass of contradictions. But Giles was right, she could use the council.
And more importantly, she could use the money. "Buffy. Don't just throw it away."
"Did you know about this?" Because if he had known about all of this, she just might
throttle him. She thought she could trust Spike. That was one thing she depended on.
Just like she depended on being able to tell when he lied to her. And if he had known
about this, she hadn't been able to tell that he knew something he wasn't telling.
"No. Giles just approached me about the job. That's all I knew. They aren't asking for
anything from you. I got your back. They want you, they need you. You will be
controlling them."
Giles felt the need to stick up for Spike. This was getting eerie, how much he was
agreeing with Spike. "He is quite right Buffy."
"You really think I should do this?" She didn't care what Giles thought; she only cared
what Spike thought. And he seemed to want her to do this.
"I do."
"Why?"
"Do you really want to work all day and then fix dinner for Dawn and then when you're
tired, patrol? When will you train? When will you have fun?"
He made a lot of sense. The practical reasons alone might be worth it. "It's not just cause
you want a paycheck?"
"The money's nice, but I don't need it."
"You wanted to get an apartment."
"I could just get a dump off of the salary Anya's paying me, instead of a nicer one that
Dawn could visit. Think of you. Think of the benefits it brings you."
"And you won't tell the council anything I don't want you to?"
"You can read every report before I send it."
She shuddered at that. She didn't want to read boring council reports. If he was getting
paid, he could handle that. "I trust you."
"Then we have a deal? You'll sign the paperwork?" Giles had been worried that she
wouldn't take it. And yes, it benefited her. But in the end, it benefited Willow more.
She needed the council's support and guidance.
"Fine Giles, I'll sign the paperwork. But I have a few changes. Any money Spike makes,
he gets to keep. He doesn't have to return any of it. And if he quits, the whole deals off.
I won't trust anyone else."
"Buffy."
"That's the deal. Take it or leave it. Now what's the salary that I get a portion of?"