There's simply too much snow in Vermont in the winter. That's why I'm glad I'm moving to Arizona soon. Ok, maybe 'soon' isn't the word, as it won't be happening for roughly seven months. Before I go, though, I'm going to take the opportunity of being covered in snow and bored to produce another chapter of the story for you guys. I can't claim any sort of inspiration for this chapter. I think the Muse that usually inspires me froze to death on the way here. Enjoy it if you can!
Secrets of Hogwarts 2Chapter 6: Firefur's Plan
Harry's reunion with his parents lasted all night. While Ron, Hermione, and the apparitions of Remus and Sirius tried to amuse themselves, the two male Potters regaled Lily with stories of their exploits over the past two years. She laughed over and over at the pranks the Marauders had pulled on Snape, Draco, and Dumbledore, and shrieked in surprise and alarm when Harry demonstrated his Animagus form for her. When he changed back, Lily surprised him by assuming her Animagus form. Harry stared in shock at the tigress that replaced his mother.
"Mom, I…I never knew!" James smiled over his wife's shoulder.
"Well, Beaky, we found out the hard way one month that we'd need another large animal to keep Moony in line during the full moon, just in case. Padfoot got badly injured during a Quidditch match against Ravenclaw, and had to spend a week in the hospital wing. Foolishly enough, Moony and I decided to go along with the plans that we'd made. I assumed I could handle him myself, but…" He shrugged and showed Harry a scar on his neck. "Madam Pomfrey was surprised, let me tell you. She couldn't figure out where I'd gotten that scar, and I couldn't tell her." Harry nodded and looked at his mother, who was still a tigress. He smiled wide.
"I suppose I'm not the only one who's noticed that the fur on her head is a little redder than the rest of her? And, of course, the green eyes." The tigress quickly shifted back to Lily.
"You're right, Beaky…you're not. Your father was nice enough to point that out when I had mastered the transformation for the first time." She glared at James, who simply smiled that disarming smile he had that always made her melt. Harry felt sort of weird, watching his parents interact like this. Lily turned back towards Harry.
"And it's not like his form is perfect…ever seen the slight spectacle markings around a certain large stag's eyes?" James glared and mock-dived at his wife, who simply sidestepped and laughed as he sunk into the floor. He was gone up to his knees before he remembered to stop.
"Anyway" Harry said as his father worked on getting out of the floor, "now we need a plan for another prank. It's only fair that all seven of us pull one off, to celebrate the return of Firefur." He smiled for a brief second before remembering something. "Of course, there is the problem of our 'prankster's block'. We haven't had a good idea for pranks since the last Quidditch match!" James, who had finally extracted himself from the floor, nodded agreement.
"I think, Beaky, that we're not coming up with good plans because we're setting our standards too high. After that first incredible trick you pulled on Snape…" He had to stop there, because the memory was setting off a round of uncontrollable laughter from him and Harry. Lily simply watched in mild surprise.
"Snape's here? Severus Snape?"
"He's…P-P-Potions mas-master" Harry choked out through his laughter. Lily nodded.
"Makes sense…he was always so good at it. Those tutoring sessions, though…" She flinched at the thought. "Let me tell you, he didn't have bezoars or wolfsbane on his mind at all when he was 'tutoring' me."
"You let him tutor you?" Harry asked.
"I didn't have a choice. Dumbledore asked him to do it, and he was only too happy to oblige." Lily seemed to cringe slightly at the thought. James picked up on it and got angry.
"And then, of course, was the sixth year incident…" Harry was naturally curious.
"What did he do?" James and Lily looked at each other, seeming to debate between them whether or not to tell him. Finally, James nodded. Lily looked to Harry.
"He…mixed a rather powerful Infatuation Concoction. Normally, there's no harm in them. Love Potions are regulated by the Ministry because of their power, but Infatuation Concoctions aren't. It was thought that they couldn't be made powerful enough to be a problem, but Snape found a way."
"Then" James continued, not bothering to keep the hatred out of his voice, "the slimy git found a way to sneak it into your mother's pumpkin juice." Harry's eyes widened as he began to understand.
"So…she was…"
"Infatuated" James said, ending his son's thought. "A very deep infatuation too, bordering on complete and total love. It made me so mad to see her, walking through the halls and hanging on his arm…and of course, he had warned her very carefully against me. I got lucky, though. Just about the time the potion was to wear off, Snape tried to sneak more of it into your mother's drink. Luckily, Padfoot intercepted him before he could do it. I'm still pretty much convinced that Padfoot got lucky, but I don't know for sure. Anyway, the concoction wore off, and…well, your mother wasn't happy with Severus."
"I HATED HIM!" Lily screamed. James and Harry both jumped. "I couldn't believe what he did to me! He was lucky that he only kissed me! If he had tried more, he would have succeeded…and after it wore off…oh, I would have killed him!"
"You'll learn to stay away from your mother when she gets like this" James murmured to Harry. "When she's angry, she's reeeeeal angry." Harry nodded and faced his mother, who was still seething. Her cheeks were bright red, and her hair was flying wildly around her face.
"Firefur…uh, I mean Mom…you've been using the past tense. Does that mean you don't hate him anymore?" Lily calmed down slightly.
"Well, of course I hate the fact that he played with my emotions like that…but eventually, I came to admire his brilliance in adapting the potion the way he did. And of course, he was a gentleman. As I mentioned before, he only kissed me, and it was usually on the cheek. I don't know…maybe somehow, he knew that even a powerful potion couldn't override my love for a certain messy-haired idiot." She smiled sweetly at James, who merely rolled his eyes.
"Well…now that that's all explained…what do you think we should do, Firefur? You have the honor of deciding our next prank." Lily's eyes twinkled in a way that reminded Harry very much of Professor Dumbledore at that moment.
"I said that I admired Snape's brilliance, and his gentlemanly ways. I never said I forgave him. I was angry enough to prank him all those years ago, and I guess I still am." James smiled and hugged his wife.
"Wonderful…although I still think you should have let us take care of him when it happened."
"You sort of did, dear…the way you were looking at him after the potion wore off scared him pretty good, I'd say. After all, he never tried it again." James considered and nodded.
"Ok, that's settled…but what about the prank?" Lily grinned.
"We need the others for that." She floated down through the floor while James and Harry waited.
"What do you think she's got in mind, Prongs?"
"No clue, Beaky. I'd imagine it's something pretty good though." After a minute or so, the rest of the Marauders came in. The kids sat on Harry's bed, and the apparitions of James, Remus, and Sirius took up positions around it. They all looked expectantly at Lily, who simply smiled.
"Marauders, the time has come for us to pull yet another prank on Professor Severus Snape." All the Marauders brightened at the news, as none of them liked Snape. "Tonight, we're going to get into his bedroom, and then…"
(Time jump)
Once again, Harry found himself sneaking into the Slytherin common room, thanks to his Invisibility Cloak and the Meeting Place. Ron and Hermione were with him this time.
It was the dead of night. The fire was still blazing in the Slytherin's fireplace, even though the common room was empty. The Marauders popped out of the wall, turning to watch the portrait of Salazar Slytherin turn back to one piece. Quietly, they walked to the fireplace. Harry tapped the lamp hanging on the left side of the mantle. "Padfoot."
Sirius's head popped out of the flames. "Yes, I am!" Harry just rolled his eyes as the left side of the fireplace opened up. This was the way it had been all day. The apparitions had seemed to be infused with new energy since his mother had rejoined the group. They'd been laughing and joking all through the planning and preparation of the new prank. Harry felt both good and bad about it: good because he liked seeing his parents and friends happy, and bad because he knew that their living versions weren't nearly so well off.
In no time, the three of them were through the wall and into Snape's bedroom. Nothing had changed since Harry had first visited it two years before…especially Snape. If anything, he was a little greasier. The apparitions were floating over his bed, laughing loud and long over how Snape looked. Harry cleared his throat.
"Don't you think you guys should hold back on the laughing until we're done? He's going to look a lot funnier in a few minutes." The apparitions agreed, and floated back as Harry, Ron, and Hermione prepared to cast their spells.
First, a quick "Morpheum" insured that Snape would stay asleep through the whole thing. Ron used a particularly powerful spell to Transfigure Snape's pajamas (completely black, of course) into a form-fitting, bright pink dress that looked like it was designed for a thirteen-year-old girl. "I particularly like the dancing teddy bears" he remarked quietly. Hermione, who was on makeup detail, worked long and hard to match blush, eyeliner, mascara, and lipstick colors with Snape's particular skin color and tone, and then just threw it all out the window and painted his face in whatever colors she wanted. Harry saved the best for last. First, he turned Snape's slippers into a pair of pink pumps to match the dress, right down to the dancing teddy bears. Next, he attempted to give Snape a nice new hairstyle to match his outfit, but it just didn't work. Everyone was shocked by this.
"I wouldn't believe it if I wasn't seeing it with my own eyes" Sirius remarked.
"His hair is greasy enough to repel MAGIC?" Remus exclaimed.
"Apparently" Lily replied. "Oh well, Beaky…just get on with the Confundus, ok?"
"Right, Firefur." Harry raised his wand and spoke. "Confundus!" An odd, sort of confused expression crossed Snape's face. Harry knelt by Snape's side and whispered instructions quickly on how to act once he woke up. Apparently satisfied with the instructions, Snape smiled in his sleep.
By now, the apparitions were laughing so hard that the Marauders were afraid someone would hear them, special charm or no. They were also afraid that someone would hear them…Hermione had buried her face in Ron's shoulder long before to cover up her giggles, and Ron himself was fighting to not just bust out laughing. Harry was laughing to himself so hard, there were tears in his eyes. He just barely made out the stones in the wall he had to tap to get back through the secret passage. The rest of the Marauders were following him, sniggering quietly. They made it as fast as they could back through the secret passage to the Meeting Place, then through to the Gryffindor common room. Harry and Ron said their goodbyes as quickly as they could, ran up the stairs to their dorm, and promptly buried their heads under their pillows and laughed themselves to sleep.
(A/N: I'm really sorry. I meant to go on to the next morning here, and show you guys what Snape did…but every time I pictured it in my mind, I started laughing uncontrollably. My family now thinks I'm insane. So, it'll have to wait until I can control myself. Read and review please!)