AUTHOR'S NOTES:
Hey everyone…^_^ I know that I've been gone for a very long time but I hope that you like this piece. I wrote it for my English class. Heehee…seems like the only time I could find to write in is English class…Aw well…at least it gives me an excuse to delve in TasChi. ^___^
It's in terza rimma (not sure of the spelling,though… ^_^;) Each stanza consists of three lines wherein the end of the 1st line rhymes with the end of the 3rd line and the end of the 2nd line rhymes with the end 1st line of the next stanza.
Anyway…I've got loads of updating to do…I'm hoping to get the *much* overdue tenth chapter of How to Attract Blue-Haired Monks out soon. I just hope people are still reading it. ^_^; sigh
So enough babbling already…on with the ficoem!! (A ficoem is a written piece that tells fanfiction in the form of a poem. ^___^ I have the disturbing tendency to make up words of my own, no da.)
WARNINGS:
I would give this a G rating but because of the shonen-ai I'll make it a PG-13, no da. ^_^
---------------------------------
Thicker Than Blood
By: Chikki
---------------------------------
It was a chance encounter, really.
Or it might have been pre-ordained by fate.
I don't know by what means but it happened to me
at the same time that I had given up on the wait.
Yet, it still came all of a sudden
And I'm just glad that it didn't happen too late.
Though on the outside I'm laughing, inside I am sullen
I fit in the world around me
When I flash fake smiles by the dozen.
I pretend to be jovial and happy
When in truth, I am breaking down.
It is because I feel that I escape from reality
when I always smile and I never frown.
I am just the monk called Houjun, always nice and always cheerful.
Everyone likes me though none care if I live or drown.
So I was walking one day, all sad and mournful.
The road was dusty and it was late afternoon.
I was tired though the day was uneventful.
Looking for a place to sleep before the rising of the moon;
The situation was hopeless for the inns were all full to the brim.
Still I wandered on, hoping to find shelter soon.
The setting sun dipped lower and the orange sky began to dim.
Terrible anxiety began to come over me
But it washed away once I set my gaze on him.
He was tucked away in a corner of the inn with his gaze all fixed and steady
The flame from the candle before him flickered
Revealing orbs with blazing amber depths, so full of life, so fiery.
And though it was quite warm, I shivered
because as I walked out, his gaze was fixed upon my back.
And when I stepped into the night, I feel back and withered
for the sun was gone, there was no moon and everything was black.
Dark clouds were starting to loom and rain was beginning to fall.
It was too much and I tried to find the strength that I happened to lack.
My past began to haunt me and I had to lean against the wall
To calm myself down and catch my breath
As dark memories took their toll.
Visions began to blind me with betrayal and with death.
My knees began to buckle,
But the pain increased with every breath.
Drops of rain fell from the sky and the wind blew ripple by ripple
It was getting very hard to see.
I tried to walk straight though all thoughts were in a muddle.
Then there was…touch…a billowing cloak is draped over me.
Suddenly, there is shelter and I am salvaged from the rain.
Raindrops blur my vision, but I am safe in this sanctuary.
I clutch the material closer while shaking drops from my azure mane.
"Who was doing this?" I thought , almost scared to turn and find out.
But then I figured that I had nothing to lose but everything to gain.
So slowly, ever so slowly, along with a lot of doubt;
I turn around to face the one who sheltered my weary soul;
And cared enough to help me and detour their daily route.
Lightning momentarily lights up everything, and in those brief moments I stole
Zealous glances at the man before me
Who had taken the savior role.
"You okay?" he asks, voice rough yet tinted with melody.
It is the man from the inn and he continues, "The rain is coming down really fast."
Somehow comforted by his presence, I nod reassuringly.
"My name is Genrou." He states and he grins while I am held aghast
at the thought that someone should care to be friends…
Has my solitude ended at last?
We walk back into the inn to really talk and tie up loose ends.
We sit at the corner table and he orders a drink
Then he says, "I am sorry. I would like to make amends."
The statement confuses me and I had to stop and think.
I barely knew this person so I ask, "Why do you say so?"
To my surprise he blushes, and then he answers without so much as a blink.
"I was watching from the moment you came in 'til the moment you turned to go."
He confesses rather reluctantly. "I must have scared you."
I open my mouth to answer, but then the winds outside began to blow.
He looks out the window and smiles dimly. "Anytime now, a storm is going to brew."
I glance out as well and speak softly, "Yes…I know."
There is a tense silence before he breaks it. "So, just what is it that you do?"
The question was unexpected and I answered it, although
I knew that it was a bad idea
Seeing as Genrou's true character had yet to show.
"My name is Houjun." I start, avoiding his stare. "A monk of the 2nd Order of Buddha."
To my amusement, he laughs rather strongly.
It is then that I notice his paraphernalia.
"Do you usually carry a sword? What are you?" I ask in curiosity.
He grins again, exposing overgrown canines before speaking
"You're a monk?" He stops and grins. "Well I'm a bandit!" and he laughs at the situations' irony.
Late into the night would find the two of us still conversing;
And just as our conversation began to close
I suddenly remembered my futile hunting.
Fingering my hair nervously, my face akin to the color of a rose,
I ask, "Do you know someone who could accommodate me as I sleep?"
He eyes me critically before replying. "Yes, I know of someone with extra burrows."
I laugh at his answer and then I struggle to keep
the last few remnants of our brief meeting so as to remember him always.
Remnants…like how his eyes were so bottomless and deep;
And the way his hair glinted like fire when I looked at him sideways.
Things like how he moves with the agile grace of a cat about to pounce
And how extreme joy and happiness dawn upon his face
whenever wine is poured into his cup, ounce by generous ounce.
Things like how his eyes always seemed to sparkle with mischief;
And how his intelligence seems to know no bounds.
Then finally I had to leave and I turned away to hide my grief.
"I have to go." I say delicately. "Midnight is just around the bend."
And I move to stand and depart from the company of the thief.
But in one fluid motion, he pulls me back down and says, "There are many problems that you have to tend."
I am taken by surprise by how he seems to know so much.
He smiles again and says, "You know what? I can sense…that I can help you as you mend."
And there it was, as simple as that, for all I needed was a touch
To open my eyes and bid me to see all the things I'm suffering through.
Things like the pain of remembering, of lost love, betrayal and such.
So from that night, we took to traveling, no one else but just us two.
We roamed the countryside together
And comforted the other when he was blue.
Merry songs, happy smiles, friendship and bouts of laughter
Colored up my brown and lifeless life
And I never had to remember
How the cold wind used to cut through me like a knife.
How the accusing stares of everyone used to unnerve me,
Adding to the burden of my strife.
Now with Genrou here, my world is no longer dreary.
He has gifted me with life and color
With his presence and camaraderie.
Then one night as he slept, I started to think about his valor.
I thought about how he was always there to life me up
And bring me back to shore.
And it was on this night, as I was drinking from my cup
That I realized that I cared for him
And that however I would try, I could not seem to stop.
Well, things changed that day, and I succumbed to his every whim.
I gave him all that he asked for
And I felt pain when he was grim.
I know that he noticed. Yes, I was very sure.
Because he gave me the oddest glimpses when he thought I wasn't looking;
And it saddened me for I may have stained his trait of being pure.
The charade went on for weeks and I thought that it was quite fetching
That he did not seem to avoid me and instead,
Came looking for me, smiling.
It's sickening, I know, how I wept every night on my bed
And longed for the man beside me
And how his image was lodged in my head.
Many would wonder about just what is it that I see
inside my fiery companion
whose visage would not let me free.
Many would think of discrimination.
They think that it is disgusting that I love
one of my own gender simulation
I just wished that our being together was willed up above
Because what I feel for him is real
He is peace to me, a beacon, like a dove.
It is really amazing…the way that he makes me feel
Because with him, I don't have to hide
And I don't have to get up and deal
with all the anger I keep inside.
He makes me feel as light as air
He is, to me, a guide
Because as long as he is there
I have no need to fear
And so, decided, I kneel next to him and gently stroke his hair.
My ministrations must have disturbed him, yet I lean in close so that he could hear.
My heart beats against my chest
As I whisper into his ear.
"I love you…" The words not meant to be heard by the rest
But everything I had, I was ready to offer
To the person that I knew best.
At first, his face is blank, but then it gets brighter and brighter.
"I love you too…" then he pulls me close against him
And we give in to the craves of the other.
So began a new chapter of our lives that was always bright and never dim.
It went on for years, full of elation and devoid of tears
Bursting with light like a prism.
There were searing kisses that swept away all fears.
Sweet nothings were whispered in the night,
Both of us not caring if anyone else hears
And now, I have learned to forgive myself and forget my sorry plight.
With Genrou, I have learned to let go
And forego the black for white.
Then came the beginning of the end of the life that I now know.
A plague swept over the land
Amidst the cold and numbing snow.
Genrou got sick, immensely so, and I wept bitterly while I held his hand
He lay dying, while I could do nothing
But then, he forced himself to stand.
He made me promise that I would go on living
As if nothing ever went wrong
And that I would keep on remembering
him so that I would be strong.
He told me that he loved me;
That he always had, all along
Then he told me that he would miss me
And then he kissed me goodbye.
I could only stare in shock as he visibly weakened before me.
And with one last smile, he turned away and I didn't even try
To bite back the tears as they fell;
No, I didn't even question why.
I tried to go on, I really did and if my façade worked, I couldn't tell.
The events of my life were too full of misery
And the idea of following Genrou sounded all too well.
So my soul broke away from my body.
My spirit was freed and I fly
I looked down at my wrist…it is bloody
Oh God, it hurt to die.
It felt as though I was on fire
With all my nerves singing one awful cry
Everything grew darker and the insistent pain was dire
My eyes…they refused to see.
The pain was burning like hot wire
What a high price to pay to be free.
And as the cosmos guided my soul along,
I think back on all that had happened to me.
Though in dreams, you urged me to be strong,
I tried hard and yet slowly, I was still wilting.
It was bound to happen, you were gone for so long
And in my thoughts, I was slowly drowning.
Thinking this, my emotions all rose in an uncontrollable wave;
But it all ended once I saw you again, ethereally smiling.
Genrou…did you know that you were flying as you neared me and you gave
me your hands, Genrou, did you know that you were glowing?
In your arms again, there is peace, and I yield right into the crave.
Now, as I sit here with you, listening to the angels that are singing;
I find myself bursting with happiness, all feelings are in a flood
I have never been so thankful and I do not notice that I am crying.
For all my life on Earth, I had given all to God
And I am happy because everyone said that blood was thicker than water;
but everyone forgot that love was thicker than blood.
OWARI
Hey everyone…^_^ I know that I've been gone for a very long time but I hope that you like this piece. I wrote it for my English class. Heehee…seems like the only time I could find to write in is English class…Aw well…at least it gives me an excuse to delve in TasChi. ^___^
It's in terza rimma (not sure of the spelling,though… ^_^;) Each stanza consists of three lines wherein the end of the 1st line rhymes with the end of the 3rd line and the end of the 2nd line rhymes with the end 1st line of the next stanza.
Anyway…I've got loads of updating to do…I'm hoping to get the *much* overdue tenth chapter of How to Attract Blue-Haired Monks out soon. I just hope people are still reading it. ^_^; sigh
So enough babbling already…on with the ficoem!! (A ficoem is a written piece that tells fanfiction in the form of a poem. ^___^ I have the disturbing tendency to make up words of my own, no da.)
WARNINGS:
I would give this a G rating but because of the shonen-ai I'll make it a PG-13, no da. ^_^
---------------------------------
Thicker Than Blood
By: Chikki
---------------------------------
It was a chance encounter, really.
Or it might have been pre-ordained by fate.
I don't know by what means but it happened to me
at the same time that I had given up on the wait.
Yet, it still came all of a sudden
And I'm just glad that it didn't happen too late.
Though on the outside I'm laughing, inside I am sullen
I fit in the world around me
When I flash fake smiles by the dozen.
I pretend to be jovial and happy
When in truth, I am breaking down.
It is because I feel that I escape from reality
when I always smile and I never frown.
I am just the monk called Houjun, always nice and always cheerful.
Everyone likes me though none care if I live or drown.
So I was walking one day, all sad and mournful.
The road was dusty and it was late afternoon.
I was tired though the day was uneventful.
Looking for a place to sleep before the rising of the moon;
The situation was hopeless for the inns were all full to the brim.
Still I wandered on, hoping to find shelter soon.
The setting sun dipped lower and the orange sky began to dim.
Terrible anxiety began to come over me
But it washed away once I set my gaze on him.
He was tucked away in a corner of the inn with his gaze all fixed and steady
The flame from the candle before him flickered
Revealing orbs with blazing amber depths, so full of life, so fiery.
And though it was quite warm, I shivered
because as I walked out, his gaze was fixed upon my back.
And when I stepped into the night, I feel back and withered
for the sun was gone, there was no moon and everything was black.
Dark clouds were starting to loom and rain was beginning to fall.
It was too much and I tried to find the strength that I happened to lack.
My past began to haunt me and I had to lean against the wall
To calm myself down and catch my breath
As dark memories took their toll.
Visions began to blind me with betrayal and with death.
My knees began to buckle,
But the pain increased with every breath.
Drops of rain fell from the sky and the wind blew ripple by ripple
It was getting very hard to see.
I tried to walk straight though all thoughts were in a muddle.
Then there was…touch…a billowing cloak is draped over me.
Suddenly, there is shelter and I am salvaged from the rain.
Raindrops blur my vision, but I am safe in this sanctuary.
I clutch the material closer while shaking drops from my azure mane.
"Who was doing this?" I thought , almost scared to turn and find out.
But then I figured that I had nothing to lose but everything to gain.
So slowly, ever so slowly, along with a lot of doubt;
I turn around to face the one who sheltered my weary soul;
And cared enough to help me and detour their daily route.
Lightning momentarily lights up everything, and in those brief moments I stole
Zealous glances at the man before me
Who had taken the savior role.
"You okay?" he asks, voice rough yet tinted with melody.
It is the man from the inn and he continues, "The rain is coming down really fast."
Somehow comforted by his presence, I nod reassuringly.
"My name is Genrou." He states and he grins while I am held aghast
at the thought that someone should care to be friends…
Has my solitude ended at last?
We walk back into the inn to really talk and tie up loose ends.
We sit at the corner table and he orders a drink
Then he says, "I am sorry. I would like to make amends."
The statement confuses me and I had to stop and think.
I barely knew this person so I ask, "Why do you say so?"
To my surprise he blushes, and then he answers without so much as a blink.
"I was watching from the moment you came in 'til the moment you turned to go."
He confesses rather reluctantly. "I must have scared you."
I open my mouth to answer, but then the winds outside began to blow.
He looks out the window and smiles dimly. "Anytime now, a storm is going to brew."
I glance out as well and speak softly, "Yes…I know."
There is a tense silence before he breaks it. "So, just what is it that you do?"
The question was unexpected and I answered it, although
I knew that it was a bad idea
Seeing as Genrou's true character had yet to show.
"My name is Houjun." I start, avoiding his stare. "A monk of the 2nd Order of Buddha."
To my amusement, he laughs rather strongly.
It is then that I notice his paraphernalia.
"Do you usually carry a sword? What are you?" I ask in curiosity.
He grins again, exposing overgrown canines before speaking
"You're a monk?" He stops and grins. "Well I'm a bandit!" and he laughs at the situations' irony.
Late into the night would find the two of us still conversing;
And just as our conversation began to close
I suddenly remembered my futile hunting.
Fingering my hair nervously, my face akin to the color of a rose,
I ask, "Do you know someone who could accommodate me as I sleep?"
He eyes me critically before replying. "Yes, I know of someone with extra burrows."
I laugh at his answer and then I struggle to keep
the last few remnants of our brief meeting so as to remember him always.
Remnants…like how his eyes were so bottomless and deep;
And the way his hair glinted like fire when I looked at him sideways.
Things like how he moves with the agile grace of a cat about to pounce
And how extreme joy and happiness dawn upon his face
whenever wine is poured into his cup, ounce by generous ounce.
Things like how his eyes always seemed to sparkle with mischief;
And how his intelligence seems to know no bounds.
Then finally I had to leave and I turned away to hide my grief.
"I have to go." I say delicately. "Midnight is just around the bend."
And I move to stand and depart from the company of the thief.
But in one fluid motion, he pulls me back down and says, "There are many problems that you have to tend."
I am taken by surprise by how he seems to know so much.
He smiles again and says, "You know what? I can sense…that I can help you as you mend."
And there it was, as simple as that, for all I needed was a touch
To open my eyes and bid me to see all the things I'm suffering through.
Things like the pain of remembering, of lost love, betrayal and such.
So from that night, we took to traveling, no one else but just us two.
We roamed the countryside together
And comforted the other when he was blue.
Merry songs, happy smiles, friendship and bouts of laughter
Colored up my brown and lifeless life
And I never had to remember
How the cold wind used to cut through me like a knife.
How the accusing stares of everyone used to unnerve me,
Adding to the burden of my strife.
Now with Genrou here, my world is no longer dreary.
He has gifted me with life and color
With his presence and camaraderie.
Then one night as he slept, I started to think about his valor.
I thought about how he was always there to life me up
And bring me back to shore.
And it was on this night, as I was drinking from my cup
That I realized that I cared for him
And that however I would try, I could not seem to stop.
Well, things changed that day, and I succumbed to his every whim.
I gave him all that he asked for
And I felt pain when he was grim.
I know that he noticed. Yes, I was very sure.
Because he gave me the oddest glimpses when he thought I wasn't looking;
And it saddened me for I may have stained his trait of being pure.
The charade went on for weeks and I thought that it was quite fetching
That he did not seem to avoid me and instead,
Came looking for me, smiling.
It's sickening, I know, how I wept every night on my bed
And longed for the man beside me
And how his image was lodged in my head.
Many would wonder about just what is it that I see
inside my fiery companion
whose visage would not let me free.
Many would think of discrimination.
They think that it is disgusting that I love
one of my own gender simulation
I just wished that our being together was willed up above
Because what I feel for him is real
He is peace to me, a beacon, like a dove.
It is really amazing…the way that he makes me feel
Because with him, I don't have to hide
And I don't have to get up and deal
with all the anger I keep inside.
He makes me feel as light as air
He is, to me, a guide
Because as long as he is there
I have no need to fear
And so, decided, I kneel next to him and gently stroke his hair.
My ministrations must have disturbed him, yet I lean in close so that he could hear.
My heart beats against my chest
As I whisper into his ear.
"I love you…" The words not meant to be heard by the rest
But everything I had, I was ready to offer
To the person that I knew best.
At first, his face is blank, but then it gets brighter and brighter.
"I love you too…" then he pulls me close against him
And we give in to the craves of the other.
So began a new chapter of our lives that was always bright and never dim.
It went on for years, full of elation and devoid of tears
Bursting with light like a prism.
There were searing kisses that swept away all fears.
Sweet nothings were whispered in the night,
Both of us not caring if anyone else hears
And now, I have learned to forgive myself and forget my sorry plight.
With Genrou, I have learned to let go
And forego the black for white.
Then came the beginning of the end of the life that I now know.
A plague swept over the land
Amidst the cold and numbing snow.
Genrou got sick, immensely so, and I wept bitterly while I held his hand
He lay dying, while I could do nothing
But then, he forced himself to stand.
He made me promise that I would go on living
As if nothing ever went wrong
And that I would keep on remembering
him so that I would be strong.
He told me that he loved me;
That he always had, all along
Then he told me that he would miss me
And then he kissed me goodbye.
I could only stare in shock as he visibly weakened before me.
And with one last smile, he turned away and I didn't even try
To bite back the tears as they fell;
No, I didn't even question why.
I tried to go on, I really did and if my façade worked, I couldn't tell.
The events of my life were too full of misery
And the idea of following Genrou sounded all too well.
So my soul broke away from my body.
My spirit was freed and I fly
I looked down at my wrist…it is bloody
Oh God, it hurt to die.
It felt as though I was on fire
With all my nerves singing one awful cry
Everything grew darker and the insistent pain was dire
My eyes…they refused to see.
The pain was burning like hot wire
What a high price to pay to be free.
And as the cosmos guided my soul along,
I think back on all that had happened to me.
Though in dreams, you urged me to be strong,
I tried hard and yet slowly, I was still wilting.
It was bound to happen, you were gone for so long
And in my thoughts, I was slowly drowning.
Thinking this, my emotions all rose in an uncontrollable wave;
But it all ended once I saw you again, ethereally smiling.
Genrou…did you know that you were flying as you neared me and you gave
me your hands, Genrou, did you know that you were glowing?
In your arms again, there is peace, and I yield right into the crave.
Now, as I sit here with you, listening to the angels that are singing;
I find myself bursting with happiness, all feelings are in a flood
I have never been so thankful and I do not notice that I am crying.
For all my life on Earth, I had given all to God
And I am happy because everyone said that blood was thicker than water;
but everyone forgot that love was thicker than blood.
OWARI