Warnings: Bandit language, bad restaurant etiquette, subconscious cuddling, lalalala.

Notes: Howdyyyyy! I have a ton and a half of reading to do this semester! ^_^;; I have NINETEEN books for my German history class alone, PLUS A PACKET. GAHHH. But anyway, I'll try to write when I'm not reading or doing papers and all that. **nodnod** Oooohh, and for all of you who might, for some bizarre reason, be wondering what the heck is up with Fires of Destiny…ehehe. I haven't abandoned it. I actually worked on the next chapter recently. I just have to be in a certain (non-sappy) mood to write it; it might go (very) slowly, but it WILL BE DONE!!! Really truly. I must appease the goddess that is Kaze-chan. ^_~ As always, thanks to everyone who's reviewed!

Saihitei no Miko: I got the mp3 for Blue Eyes Blue from WinMX, which you can download online. ^_^ Otherwise, I think it's on the Seiryuu Counter-Attack CD, which you can purchase for about $12 at Animecastle.com, which is a very cheap online anime store. ^_^

Neko-chan: Your reviews crack me up! Never worry about them being too long! Long reviews gooood! ^_~

qkslvr: Get some sleep!! ^_~

Sano: Worry not, your Boshis are coming up soon. ^__^

Yifiig: Yes, indeedy, Hikitsu's seishi symbol's on his eye. ^_^ But Ryuuen doesn't know that. ^_~

Roku-chan: You're a sex addict. :P

Everyone else: Ya know I love ya! ^___^

YET ANOTHER STORY

Chapter Seventeen:

Talk About Karma!

"I don't sense anything from him," said Ayuru, quiet and solemn. "Not a thing."

Sai and I blinked, and my eyes darted in the direction of our table in the restaurant we'd stopped at for dinner; naturally, as we were hiding in the hallway near the bathrooms, I couldn't see much.

"Nothing?" Sai said, frowning, and Ayuru shook his head, mouth set firmly.

"But…he's not Miboshi, then, right? He's not a seishi turned evil by whatever spells Miboshi might have?" I asked hopefully.

"I don't know how those things work," Ayuru replied. "But I know the bond I feel with you, and with him…it's just blank. He could be anyone. He could be a raving lunatic who somehow got hold of the information he divulged about our universe. He could be one of Miboshi's henchmen…though that seems highly unlikely, as Miboshi held other lives in scorn, and would have nothing to do with those who weren't seishi."

"Or he could be someone from the book that only knew one of the seishi," I added, remembering my former ideas. "You know, like Kouji…er, he's one of Genrou's friends who was also there in the book," I explained to Ayuru. "Or Kouran. Or Shouka."

Sai sighed, taking a step back and leaning against the wood-paneled wall. His arms were folded across his chest, and he frowned at the ground. "He must be linked to us, somehow, since we recognize him. But I can't remember meeting anyone who looked like that when I lived back then. I know you can't, either, Ryuuen, nor Myojuan, nor Genrou…so he must know one of the others."

"Chichiri!" I said, keeping my voice down, though I was excited. "He said he remembered someone with one eye, and I thought it was Hikitsu, but it could be Chichiri!"

"I just want to caution you," Ayuru continued, "about letting too much be known. Until you discover exactly who he is, or was, it would be wise to keep discussion to a minimum."

I fidgeted, thinking he was addressing me in particular. "I…I'm really sorry, guys…I was just excited, and I didn't think…"

"Ryuuen." I looked up hesitantly to see Sai shaking his head at me, smiling. "Believe it or not, everything in the world is not your fault. I was talking to him just as much as you were, and even Myojuan said a few things."

"Ryuuen, it is by no means your fault," Ayuru added. "You felt a connection with this boy; it was natural that you wanted to trust him. It's highly likely that he means no harm; a little time, however, would be desirable before launching into great detail."

Although I was still dubious, it was something, at least, to know they didn't blame me. I felt a little better, and gave them both a small smile. "Well, if Nakago says so."

"He does, indeed," Ayuru agreed with a solemn nod. "Now. It would also be wise to return to the table before Genrou breaks something…like Tom's head." He cocked an eyebrow tiredly, and Sai chuckled, putting an arm around my shoulders as we walked back to the table. I put my own arm around his waist, smiling widely and thinking to myself that, no matter what had happened to make me undesirable, I was the luckiest person in the world.

Tom was not dead, it turned out, but sitting next to Myojuan with his hands in his lap, swaying from side to side and looking around the place with large eyes. The food still hadn't come, and both Genrou and Myojuan looked the worse for it; Genrou was still sulking, his arms crossed on the table and his head buried in them, and Myojuan was staring straight ahead at nothing, his eyes rather glazed. As Ayuru sat down next to Myojuan and Sai and I approached, Tom stopped swaying and moved his eyes to us.

"Say," he said, "y'all goin out, or somethin?"

Genrou took the opportunity to slam his head down on the table, and I lowered myself into the seat beside him with bright red cheeks.

"Don't get me wrong!" Tom was quick to exclaim. "I mean, I think it's great and all, you two decidin to give society a kick in the ass." He gave a firm nod. "I think so many things'd be better if homos got the same legal treatment as the rest of us! But since the goddamn Republican government's backed by the goddamn church… Shit, Ryuuen! Don't look like that; be proud a yerself!"

Ooh, time to play Count The Staring People!! One…Two…Five million and threeee…

"Look, will ya shut the fuck up??" Genrou hissed. "They're proud, okay?? They're fuckin burstin, but like any normal people, maybe they don't wanna fuckin announce it to the entire world!!!"

"Genrou. Please," Sai begged, again rubbing his nose with his forefinger. "I'm sure he didn't mean any harm; please stop shouting."

Immediately, of course, Gen-chan was offended. "Oh, so this is what I fuckin get when I try ta defend you assholes???! Fine, then; just fuckin fine!! Next time you two're harassed or fuckin threatened, I'll just mind my own fuckin business and let ya both get the shit beat outa ya!"

"Well, shit, I ain't makin as big a deal as you!!" Tom retorted.

"Well, I wouldn't've had ta fuckin shout in the first place if you weren't such a fuckin moron!!"

"Not half as big a moron as you, you fire-headed, fang-toothed, dust-eatin, pathetic excuse for a warrior!!!!!"

This did not bode well for Genrou's Anger On-Anger Off switch, and a stream of curses as long as the Pennsylvania Turnpike was soon spewing from his mouth like water from Buckingham Fountain. To make matters worse, and more people stare at us, Tom started cussin right back, punctuating his own attack with stereotypical dialectal insults. Sinking in my chair, I remembered that, at one point, we had vowed never to take Genrou out to eat ever ever ever again, and I wished we'd kept that vow.

To our relief, Ayuru put an end to it. Slowly and deliberately, he put both hands on the table in front of him and stood, glaring icily at both Genrou and Tom, reaching his full height and looming over everyone. Reformed or not, the guy was still scary, and Tom and Genrou stopped in the middle of a curse, staring in poorly disguised fright at the big ex-shogun.

Ayuru remained there for a few moments, regarding them stonily, before sitting back down. "Thank you."

I was half afraid the waiter would come and tell us to leave, but I guess we were too potentially dangerous for them to risk it. The guy came out rather quickly, whipped our drinks onto the table, and retreated just as fast; after a few minutes, most people stopped staring at us, too, and went back to their dinners. When I finally looked back across the table at Genrou and Tom, Genrou was sulking again and muttering something under his breath, and Tom…

I blinked.

Tom, it appeared, was…snuggling with Myojuan.

He'd leaned to the side, and had wrapped both his arms around one of Myojuan's, resting his head on Myojuan's upper arm. As I watched, he rubbed his face against our friend's sleeve, nuzzling.

I blinked again, my jaw falling open. Myojuan himself had been frozen into immobility, his eyes bugging out…I mean, what did one do when a total stranger started hugging one out of the blue??

"What the fuck?" Gen-chan exclaimed.

Tom just looked at him, uncomprehending… Then, suddenly, his eyes went huge and he shoved himself away quickly, flushing red. "I…I didn't mean it!" he cried.

"What, it was a fuckin subconscious cuddle??"

Who is this guy?? I asked myself, astounded, as Tom immediately began to defend himself…loudly. Who on earth…

But then, all at once…

Holy high-blooming cows!!

"Ahh!" I exclaimed. "NO WAY!"

The coloring…the recognition…

"Tama," Myojuan said, disbelief in his eyes, and Tom stopped himself in mid-protest, looking quickly over at Myojuan with a shocked expression on his face.

"Tama??!" snorted Genrou. "No way he's fuckin Tama; Tama's a fuckin cat!!"

"Alllll right, fellas!" said the waiter, suddenly appearing with a tray full of food. His rather forced smile betrayed his uneasiness at even being near us. "Who had the fish?"

"Ah…" Tom said, raising his hand, still stunned.

"HOLY SHIT!!" said Genrou, and our poor waiter jumped back three feet, skillfully balancing the plates on the tray.

"It all makes sense!" I said, grinning. "We recognized you, and Ayuru didn't… You remember a guy with one eye, and you spent all that time with Chichiri!"

"Uhhh…hold up," said Tom, holding up his hand to slow me down. "Hold up a darn minute, now…who didja say I was, and why does this explain me, uhh…and Myojuan just now?"

"Oh my god," said Ayuru, deadpan. "He was the cat."

"Cat??" Tom exclaimed, a little indignant. "Who's a cat??"

"How the fuck did that happen??"

"What the heck're ya doin??!" Tom cried as Myojuan dazedly reached out a hand and started scratching the boy's head. I started laughing, I couldn't help myself. Tama-neko had been reincarnated into a human!! How useful was that??

I mean, talk about karma!!

"I'm testing the theory," Myojuan mumbled. "Tama always loved to have his head scratched…"

"Well, look here, pal; you guys are nice and all, but I ain't no freakin c… ahhhhhh!" A shiver seemed to run through Tom, a dopey smile replacing the look of indignation as he closed his eyes and leaned toward Myojuan again.

"Whoooo's a pretty boy," our big friend cooed.

Meanwhile, my bones had turned to rubber, and I was laughing so hard my stomach hurt and tears were leaking from my eyes. When Sai reached over to pat me on the back, I grabbed his sleeve and pointed across at Myojuan and Tom in an obvious explanation for my behavior. Then I looked over at Genrou and laughed even harder at his incredulous expression. He looked like he'd just seen Tom turn into a giant turkey, or something.

"Ummmm," said the waiter, sounding as if he'd rather be fighting moth men in outer space than serving us, "Spaghetti with marinara sauce?"

It was my food, but when I tried to raise my hand, it wouldn't go up all the way. I had lost all control of my muscles. Luckily, Sai was there to direct the dinners of those incapacitated by laughter or surprise, and he placed my dish before me and leaned in.

"I can see how amusing the situation is," he said, laughter evident in his voice, "but I saw you put those pretzels in your bag, and I never saw you take them out again. Therefore, if you do not start eating in five seconds, I will feed you to Ayuru."

If this was supposed to make me stop laughing, it failed miserably. Ayuru apparently possessed hearing beyond the normal human range, and at Sai's teasing words, he turned such a glare at my boyfriend that my laughter became so violent as to be completely silent, and I gasped for breath without much luck.

"Juan," said Genrou through clenched teeth, "stop. Petting. The fuckin. Gas boy."

"You won't be homeless any more," Myojuan was saying fondly to Tom, who was again nuzzling Myojuan's sleeve. "I'll take you home with me. We'll buy you a nice futon, and lots and lots of tuna…"

"GYAAAHHH!!!! GET A FUCKIN ROOM!!" my best friend exploded, throwing his hamburger at Tom and hitting him in the face. "And SHUT THE FUCK UP, Ryuuen!!! STOP FUCKIN LAUGHING!!!"

A familiar hand suddenly reached out, placing its palm on the opposite side of my head and drawing me over. As my head came to rest on Sai's shoulder, his hand gently stroking my hair in an effort to calm me down, my hysteria was gradually replaced by giggles, a product of both Sai's effective efforts and newfound lovesickness. Gleefully, I watched as Genrou and Ayuru shared a meaningful look, silently communicating that neither one of them would give in to peer pressure and start petting the other.

Tom had picked up the hamburger, finally detaching himself from Myojuan with a rather feline smirk—ehehe—and had taken a sizable bite of it, chewing deliberately slowly. Gen-chan just glowered and shoved eight french fries into his mouth at once. When I'd started breathing regularly again and Sai had pointedly handed me my fork, removing his hand from my head, I set about eating, keeping one eye on Tama-neko and thinking how cool it was that reincarnation could cross species barriers.

"I'm sorry," Sai said to Tom when silence had once again fallen at the table, its occupants now engaged in eating their nearly cold dinners. "This does mean that you're no longer a seishi. But it doesn't make you any less important in our eyes. I'm not sure how much you remember, but you helped us out quite a few times."

"Hell, this explains so goddamn much!" Tom was musing around his mouthful of food. Evidently, he'd progressed past the denial stage and was now embracing his newfound catness. "Why I like fish so much, why my ears itch all the time, why I keep having dreams where I'm a cat, why I can see in the dark…"

"Excuse me, but…wouldn't that make it…slightly obvious?" Sai inquired tactfully.

He shrugged. "Iunno, I thought it was like a, like one of them symbolic dreams or somethin."

"Symbolic of how ya used to be a fuckin cat??" Gen-chan said dryly.

"Uh-huh, and I'm sure none a y'all's ever dreamt you was somethin else," Tom said accusingly. "Like a cat or a dog or a piece of dryer lint!"

We stared at him.

He sighed. "What I mean is, there're dreams and there're dreams, y'know? Like, all those dreams with y'all, I knew those were real. But I've also dreamed, y'know, that my dad was a giant potato. And that sure's hell ain't true! I didn't have strong feelins of truth in the cat dreams like I did with the others, so I thought, well…ta hell with 'em! They're just stupid cat dreams!"

"But you can see in the dark?" I pressed. "That's what you said, right?"

"Thassright." He nodded. "Clear's day."

"That's a pretty nifty power!"

"Yup, it comes in handy."

"Ex…..cuse me, sir…sir…madam," came a voice, and we all looked up to see a different waiter, a tall man with oily black hair and wearing a badge that said "STEVE McPHERSON: Manager," and who apparently thought I was a woman, "I'm sorry to intrude, but we have many people waiting for seating…"

"Kick US outa the fuckin restaurant, WILL YA??!!!" Gen-chan exclaimed, red-faced, standing up ferociously.

The man blanched, but held his ground with courage. "Well, perhaps if you and your…friends…could make an effort not to be so, er…enthusiastic…it might…"

"Talkin down to us like we was shoeless white trash??" Tom said, standing as well. "You better not do what I think y'all're thinkin a doin, or I fuckin swear, I'll be makin a few calls to the Better Business Bureau! Thassright, I ain't bluffin!! Tremble in yer shoes, little weasel man!"

"Hell, yeah!!" said Genrou approvingly. "Tell 'em, Fluffy! We aren't settin a fuckin foot outa this fuckin place until each and every one of us is done fuckin eatin!!"

~*~

Two minutes later, dusting our pants off from where management had tossed us in the snow, we traipsed back to the van.

"Well," said Sai, "we've had more than our fair share of blunders in restaurant etiquette, but I must say, that's the first time we've ever been kicked out of one. What a story to tell to the others!"

"Shut the hell up," Genrou and Tom growled, and I grabbed Sai's hand and squeezed.

They lost their battle, but at least they're on the same side now. And that's always a good thing.

And soon, with Tom and Genrou protesting their unfair treatment all the way, we were back on the gray winter road.

TBC…

Notes: Okayyyyy, I know at least five of you knew who he was!!! Anyone else guess? ^_~

YET ANOTHER STORY AKUGI!!! Take One:

Ayuru: I don't sense anything from him. Not a thing.

Ryuuen: **narrating** Sai and I blinked, and my eyes darted in the direction of our table in the restaurant we'd stopped at for dinner; naturally, as we were hiding in the hallway near the bathrooms…

Ayuru: Hold up. I gotta pee. **goes into the bathroom**

YET ANOTHER STORY AKUGI!!!! Take Two:

Myojuan: Whooooo's a pretty boy???

Ryuuen & Sai: **raising hands** I am!!!