The Diary
With a soft sigh, inside her four-poster-bed Hermione kept her quill and closed her diary. The round watch in her wrist reported it was twenty-three minutes after seven p.m. The diary was utterly secret. She wrote things in the small, leather-bound notebook that she would never dare tell anyone. If her friends or her roommates found it... But that wasn't even worth considering. No one would find it, and that was that She got out of the bed and turned off the candle. Barefoot, she tiptoed, careful not to make the floorboards creak; to the place she hid her little book. Hermione Granger clapped her hand over her mouth to stifle a giggle No one would ever find it.
* * *
Two young women, clad in the latest fashion clothes and eating blowing popcorn, sat around in the common room They were the only ones there. Some tear-jerking, romantic story was being recounted in the magical radio, evoking sniffles and the occasional tear from the duo.
"Hey, like, 'By the hand of a Princess' is coming on next. Hermy loves that story; let's get her." "Don't you think she's, like, having dinner, like everyone else?" "Like, just a few minutes ago the light was still on in the room." "Yeah, she's probably still here." "Perhaps she's doing her homework..." "Today's Saturday remember??"
Lavender stretched from her spot on the floor, and left to get the brown-haired girl. "Hermy?" she called softly into the dark bedroom. She searched along her pocket until she found her wand. "Lumos" she whispered "Oh, holy daisies" she muttered as her gaze swung around the room. Ink littered the desk and in the 2nd bed to the right Hermione was having an afternoon nap.
Out of habit, Lavender waded over to a crooked picture on Hermione's wall and straightened it. Something knocked against the wall when she did this, something behind the picture... Lavender smiled wickedly at what she found there. "Oh, this is totally too much," she breathed mischievously.
* * *
Hermione tossed and turned in her sleep. She was vaguely aware of some force pulling her from her dreams, some bright, over-whelming force...
With a start, she awoke. She rubbed her eyes and yawned. It was only the light. But wait, she thought, didn't I turn of the light? Dread settled over her. Someone had been in the room. She laughed nervously. Lavender or Isabella (well, someone else has to be a female16 year old Gryffindor!) she told herself. "But I have to be completely sure" With heavy footsteps, she walked slowly to the picture on the wall next to her bed. With a trembling hand, she pulled the wall hanging back. Empty.
She ran out to the common room. At first, she didn't feel much of anything when she saw her roommates clustered around her notebook, snickering and reading aloud-choice parts. Just an emptiness, as empty as the cavity behind the muggle Van Gogh's "Sunflowers", in her room. Lavender looked up and saw the girl's still form. She smiled. "Like, thanks for the book, Hermy. This is way better than hearing some radio- soap." "Totally!" Parvati squealed in agreement. "Oh, look! Here's another part about Harry! Ahem, 'When Harry looks at me, I have to keep myself from staring into his green, dreamy eyes.' This is too good!" "Way!" Parvati agreed again All at once, emotion returned to Hermione. She felt her body tremble with rage. She would make them pay for what they had done. She angrily brushed away the tears that had materialized on her face. I'm so weak, she thought scornfully of herself. I'm standing here crying like a baby. And that's what I've always been: a baby. I let them do whatever they want to me. I try to have one thing to myself, and they take it away! Suddenly, Hermione did not feel weak anymore. She would show them. She ran blindly at the other girls. She did not really know what she intended to do. They were probably stronger than she was; she wouldn't be able to wrestle her diary away. She couldn't curse them either. She wanted to physically fight them, but could she? They were her friends... To her dismay, they ran away from her laughing. "If you want your little diary, Hermy, like, come and get it!" teased Lavender. Hermione was sobbing desperately by now, and it made her angrier, but at herself. She was so helpless against people. Shut up, she reprimanded her own despondent mental discourse. You'll make them sorry they ever laid eyes on your diary. This time will be different. By the time she erased the thought she realized that "Parvie" and "Lavvie" ran all over the common room, laughing all the way, with Hermione hot on their trail. An owl and a cat watched in fascinated confusion at their owner's antics. "Oh, look! Like, here's something," announced Lavender loudly. She began to read from the book. "'When I'm free and happy on the sunny road, I know how the Prince feels who once was a toad.' Like, I think it's supposed to be poetry!" "Our Hermy writing *poetry*? Like, as if!" Parvati snickered. "Yeah, but she made a mistake: she still is a toad." They laughed. Hermione glared daggers at the older girls, feeling herself shrink with every passing second. She lifted her chin and stood up straighter, harnessing the power of her rage. "SHUT UP!!!"
She was surprised at the sound and volume of her own voice. The other girls actually stopped, and gaped at the transformed Miss Granger. 'You've never given me anything to myself! It's always been all about you!" "Dresses, homework, favors!! She shouted, pointing an accusing finger at them. I hate you! I hate you!! You can both go to hell as far as I'm concerned' Do you really hate them? She questioned herself. But she pushed the question away. Reason would take away her anger, and she needed that anger right now. The girls just stood and stared at her for a long time, shocked expressions on their faces. Parvati was the first to react. "Fine! Face it, baby girl, you're jealous. Because we are pretty and popular and you're not. And that's why your loved Harry just see you as a friend. So like don't go blaming us for your weakness!" She charged at them again, but this time with raging purpose but again they ran laughing and giggling this time out of the Gryffindor common room. Down and up the stairs they stopped in the4th floor Hallway. "Ha ha ha look at this!! 'Loving him is not the best thing to do but its perfect. And its necessary to find a reason to do the same things over and over again. To remember that I exist and that I feel.' "Ha ha ha, Looks like Hermy is in love!" Hermione' hands trembled with intention. She would not back down, and she would not let them get away. She didn't have a wand! Oh, but she had her hands. She found her closed fists aiming towards Parvati. "What are you going to do?? Like, hit me or what??" "The hell I am" It was like Hermione hadn't had control of her own fist. At first it was only punching. But it meant a lot more. It meant that after all she was strong. She would make her pay. She would. And she attacked Parvati again. Lavender held her back, but with much difficulty. The she bound her with a curse. Parvati, who held the diary, glared at her coldly with her bruised eye, only a few inches out of reach. Slowly and deliberately, she opened the book, and ripped each and every page out. The pieces wafted airily to the floor. Hermione refused to cry. She would not beg for her to stop. Parvati knew exactly how much she was hurting her, exactly what the diary meant to her. If that wasn't enough to make her stop, nothing was. When the task was done, Herm's diary lay in a hundred shreds, thoroughly destroyed Lavender at last let her go. Hermione rushed at Parvati, holding up a tightly clenched fist. Parvati did nothing to try to protect herself, the other one was as still as a statue. She could do it now, she could knock the hell out of her, out of the both of them if she wanted... She slowly dropped her hand. Parvati smirked. It was good to be the winner. "Goodbye, Hermy," she intoned haughtily. "Don't stay up too late, 'kay?" Her slow footsteps seemed to resound throughout the building as she left. Hermione sank slowly to her knees amidst the scraps of paper that were once her most sacred and prized possession. She swallowed hard, and searched for that emptiness she had felt at the very beginning. Lavender was still there. She kneeled beside her and offered to help her pick up the pieces. "No!" Hermione shouted and slapped Lavender's hands away. "Go away! I don't need your help, I don't need anyone's help!" She gasped, actually afraid of her, or at least afraid of the side of her personality she was showing. "I am the weakling, right? The ugly one, the misfit one. Well, you're right! So just go! You were always kinder than me, and you're more beautiful than me. You'll marry handsome and rich men and live happily, perfectly ever after! Are you happy?"
Lavender did not know what to say. "Hermy!! ... Hermione, please..." "Just go!" Lavender sighed resignedly and left, and with her went her rage. Alone in the dark hallway, she was just a powerless little girl again. Whatever hold she had possessed over Lavender would be gone by the next time she saw her. The tears came, and this time she did not restrain them. I do care, she admitted to herself. I do care that they're prettier than me. I always told myself that I didn't, that I didn't care about being adorable or beautiful, but I really do. I *really* do. She started gathering up her diary. More footsteps broke the silence of the hallway. Hermione refused to turn and face whichever girl it might have been. They had already won; whatever else they wanted from her could not hurt her any more. But she gasped as the owner of the footsteps came around, into her line of sight. She scowled furiously at Draco. Would this afternoon never end? She asked herself. It wasn't enough that she had to lose at Parvati and Lavender again. She had to face the Slytherins at her weakest moment, too? But Draco seemed to be alone. No Crabbe, No Goyle and definitely no Pansy. His eyes were strangely aqueous. Without a word, he kneeled and began gathering the scraps of paper into a pile. Hermione joined him, and soon the entirety of the diary was collected. "Thank you," Hermione said the most rudely she could. "But I could have done it myself." "I know," Draco said hoarsely. "But sometimes it's nice to have some help." Hermione thought this over for a while and smiled. From anyone else, the comment would have sounded trite, but the advice was strangely meaningful coming from Draco. Finally, the girl nodded once. Yes, help was nice. The two young people left the hallway from opposite places.
For some reason, Draco did not laughed at Hermione, even though he could have. Hermione had not changed her relationship with her roomies. But that did not stop either of them from trying, and planning in their minds how tomorrow would be special and different. Nothing changed that day.
With a soft sigh, inside her four-poster-bed Hermione kept her quill and closed her diary. The round watch in her wrist reported it was twenty-three minutes after seven p.m. The diary was utterly secret. She wrote things in the small, leather-bound notebook that she would never dare tell anyone. If her friends or her roommates found it... But that wasn't even worth considering. No one would find it, and that was that She got out of the bed and turned off the candle. Barefoot, she tiptoed, careful not to make the floorboards creak; to the place she hid her little book. Hermione Granger clapped her hand over her mouth to stifle a giggle No one would ever find it.
* * *
Two young women, clad in the latest fashion clothes and eating blowing popcorn, sat around in the common room They were the only ones there. Some tear-jerking, romantic story was being recounted in the magical radio, evoking sniffles and the occasional tear from the duo.
"Hey, like, 'By the hand of a Princess' is coming on next. Hermy loves that story; let's get her." "Don't you think she's, like, having dinner, like everyone else?" "Like, just a few minutes ago the light was still on in the room." "Yeah, she's probably still here." "Perhaps she's doing her homework..." "Today's Saturday remember??"
Lavender stretched from her spot on the floor, and left to get the brown-haired girl. "Hermy?" she called softly into the dark bedroom. She searched along her pocket until she found her wand. "Lumos" she whispered "Oh, holy daisies" she muttered as her gaze swung around the room. Ink littered the desk and in the 2nd bed to the right Hermione was having an afternoon nap.
Out of habit, Lavender waded over to a crooked picture on Hermione's wall and straightened it. Something knocked against the wall when she did this, something behind the picture... Lavender smiled wickedly at what she found there. "Oh, this is totally too much," she breathed mischievously.
* * *
Hermione tossed and turned in her sleep. She was vaguely aware of some force pulling her from her dreams, some bright, over-whelming force...
With a start, she awoke. She rubbed her eyes and yawned. It was only the light. But wait, she thought, didn't I turn of the light? Dread settled over her. Someone had been in the room. She laughed nervously. Lavender or Isabella (well, someone else has to be a female16 year old Gryffindor!) she told herself. "But I have to be completely sure" With heavy footsteps, she walked slowly to the picture on the wall next to her bed. With a trembling hand, she pulled the wall hanging back. Empty.
She ran out to the common room. At first, she didn't feel much of anything when she saw her roommates clustered around her notebook, snickering and reading aloud-choice parts. Just an emptiness, as empty as the cavity behind the muggle Van Gogh's "Sunflowers", in her room. Lavender looked up and saw the girl's still form. She smiled. "Like, thanks for the book, Hermy. This is way better than hearing some radio- soap." "Totally!" Parvati squealed in agreement. "Oh, look! Here's another part about Harry! Ahem, 'When Harry looks at me, I have to keep myself from staring into his green, dreamy eyes.' This is too good!" "Way!" Parvati agreed again All at once, emotion returned to Hermione. She felt her body tremble with rage. She would make them pay for what they had done. She angrily brushed away the tears that had materialized on her face. I'm so weak, she thought scornfully of herself. I'm standing here crying like a baby. And that's what I've always been: a baby. I let them do whatever they want to me. I try to have one thing to myself, and they take it away! Suddenly, Hermione did not feel weak anymore. She would show them. She ran blindly at the other girls. She did not really know what she intended to do. They were probably stronger than she was; she wouldn't be able to wrestle her diary away. She couldn't curse them either. She wanted to physically fight them, but could she? They were her friends... To her dismay, they ran away from her laughing. "If you want your little diary, Hermy, like, come and get it!" teased Lavender. Hermione was sobbing desperately by now, and it made her angrier, but at herself. She was so helpless against people. Shut up, she reprimanded her own despondent mental discourse. You'll make them sorry they ever laid eyes on your diary. This time will be different. By the time she erased the thought she realized that "Parvie" and "Lavvie" ran all over the common room, laughing all the way, with Hermione hot on their trail. An owl and a cat watched in fascinated confusion at their owner's antics. "Oh, look! Like, here's something," announced Lavender loudly. She began to read from the book. "'When I'm free and happy on the sunny road, I know how the Prince feels who once was a toad.' Like, I think it's supposed to be poetry!" "Our Hermy writing *poetry*? Like, as if!" Parvati snickered. "Yeah, but she made a mistake: she still is a toad." They laughed. Hermione glared daggers at the older girls, feeling herself shrink with every passing second. She lifted her chin and stood up straighter, harnessing the power of her rage. "SHUT UP!!!"
She was surprised at the sound and volume of her own voice. The other girls actually stopped, and gaped at the transformed Miss Granger. 'You've never given me anything to myself! It's always been all about you!" "Dresses, homework, favors!! She shouted, pointing an accusing finger at them. I hate you! I hate you!! You can both go to hell as far as I'm concerned' Do you really hate them? She questioned herself. But she pushed the question away. Reason would take away her anger, and she needed that anger right now. The girls just stood and stared at her for a long time, shocked expressions on their faces. Parvati was the first to react. "Fine! Face it, baby girl, you're jealous. Because we are pretty and popular and you're not. And that's why your loved Harry just see you as a friend. So like don't go blaming us for your weakness!" She charged at them again, but this time with raging purpose but again they ran laughing and giggling this time out of the Gryffindor common room. Down and up the stairs they stopped in the4th floor Hallway. "Ha ha ha look at this!! 'Loving him is not the best thing to do but its perfect. And its necessary to find a reason to do the same things over and over again. To remember that I exist and that I feel.' "Ha ha ha, Looks like Hermy is in love!" Hermione' hands trembled with intention. She would not back down, and she would not let them get away. She didn't have a wand! Oh, but she had her hands. She found her closed fists aiming towards Parvati. "What are you going to do?? Like, hit me or what??" "The hell I am" It was like Hermione hadn't had control of her own fist. At first it was only punching. But it meant a lot more. It meant that after all she was strong. She would make her pay. She would. And she attacked Parvati again. Lavender held her back, but with much difficulty. The she bound her with a curse. Parvati, who held the diary, glared at her coldly with her bruised eye, only a few inches out of reach. Slowly and deliberately, she opened the book, and ripped each and every page out. The pieces wafted airily to the floor. Hermione refused to cry. She would not beg for her to stop. Parvati knew exactly how much she was hurting her, exactly what the diary meant to her. If that wasn't enough to make her stop, nothing was. When the task was done, Herm's diary lay in a hundred shreds, thoroughly destroyed Lavender at last let her go. Hermione rushed at Parvati, holding up a tightly clenched fist. Parvati did nothing to try to protect herself, the other one was as still as a statue. She could do it now, she could knock the hell out of her, out of the both of them if she wanted... She slowly dropped her hand. Parvati smirked. It was good to be the winner. "Goodbye, Hermy," she intoned haughtily. "Don't stay up too late, 'kay?" Her slow footsteps seemed to resound throughout the building as she left. Hermione sank slowly to her knees amidst the scraps of paper that were once her most sacred and prized possession. She swallowed hard, and searched for that emptiness she had felt at the very beginning. Lavender was still there. She kneeled beside her and offered to help her pick up the pieces. "No!" Hermione shouted and slapped Lavender's hands away. "Go away! I don't need your help, I don't need anyone's help!" She gasped, actually afraid of her, or at least afraid of the side of her personality she was showing. "I am the weakling, right? The ugly one, the misfit one. Well, you're right! So just go! You were always kinder than me, and you're more beautiful than me. You'll marry handsome and rich men and live happily, perfectly ever after! Are you happy?"
Lavender did not know what to say. "Hermy!! ... Hermione, please..." "Just go!" Lavender sighed resignedly and left, and with her went her rage. Alone in the dark hallway, she was just a powerless little girl again. Whatever hold she had possessed over Lavender would be gone by the next time she saw her. The tears came, and this time she did not restrain them. I do care, she admitted to herself. I do care that they're prettier than me. I always told myself that I didn't, that I didn't care about being adorable or beautiful, but I really do. I *really* do. She started gathering up her diary. More footsteps broke the silence of the hallway. Hermione refused to turn and face whichever girl it might have been. They had already won; whatever else they wanted from her could not hurt her any more. But she gasped as the owner of the footsteps came around, into her line of sight. She scowled furiously at Draco. Would this afternoon never end? She asked herself. It wasn't enough that she had to lose at Parvati and Lavender again. She had to face the Slytherins at her weakest moment, too? But Draco seemed to be alone. No Crabbe, No Goyle and definitely no Pansy. His eyes were strangely aqueous. Without a word, he kneeled and began gathering the scraps of paper into a pile. Hermione joined him, and soon the entirety of the diary was collected. "Thank you," Hermione said the most rudely she could. "But I could have done it myself." "I know," Draco said hoarsely. "But sometimes it's nice to have some help." Hermione thought this over for a while and smiled. From anyone else, the comment would have sounded trite, but the advice was strangely meaningful coming from Draco. Finally, the girl nodded once. Yes, help was nice. The two young people left the hallway from opposite places.
For some reason, Draco did not laughed at Hermione, even though he could have. Hermione had not changed her relationship with her roomies. But that did not stop either of them from trying, and planning in their minds how tomorrow would be special and different. Nothing changed that day.