Drew: You figured it out right?
Irvine: ….Er…not really, no.
Drew: You were James Bond admiting he had a kid.
Irvine: Then shouldn't I have been admiting to more than one kid?
BM: Like five thousand man!
Drew: Well, anyway, that was great. No points, cause frankley, I COME FIRST WITH POINTS! HA HA!……anyways, moving along, another game for all four of you, the Millionaire Show! Squall, you're gonna be the host of a millionaire show, and Irvine's gonna be the contestant, BM's gonna be the friend in the audience, and Yuffie'll be the phone thing. But the snag is – This is the Redneck version of the millionaire show! Go ahead and start!
Squall: (Ready to eliminate his dignity -_-;;;) Well heylo y'all, and welcome to Who Wants Enough Beer to Last a Lifetime! Y'all gonna say hi to Billy Bob from lastday's show?
AUDIENCE: HEYLO BILLY BOB!
Irvine: Heylo, Faggits!
Squall: Now remember pardner, you're up to five hundred grand beers now! Two kestions to go! Are you readeh?
Irvine: Pardner, I was CONCIEVED ready!
Squall: Alrighty, for five hundred grand beers, What's the head city o Canada? A) EH? B) T'ronto, C) hottawah, or D) Pole-and?
(AUTHORS NOTE – Please take no offense to the mention of Canada. I'm Canadian myself ^_^)
Irvine: Oooo…gitty, that them's a tough question!
Squall: Do yeh wanna call up your mommy in Georgia, or do you wanna talk to your war buddy Joe Bob in the audience?
Irvine: I think I'ma go for my war buddy Joe Bob in the audience! Joe Bob?
BM: (Stands up the audience) Heeey Billy Bob!
Irvine: Joe Bob? A B C or D?
BM: *Hic* It might help if I knew the question?
Irvine: What's da capital of Canada?
BM: POLE-AAAND!
Squall: Well Billy Bob, he sez Poland, do y'all think that's right?
Irvine: I say yes!
Squall: YOU DIRTY STINKING ROTTEN SON OF A GUN! Yeah, YOU GOT IT RIGHT!
Irvine: WHOOOOOO! ^_^
(Audience applauds)
Squall: So you fetched your stinkin butt a half million beers? That's just sweller. Now for da top prize of a million beers, are you ready?
Irvine: I can taste mah liver shuttin down already!
Squall: For one million beers, here's da question- One hillbilly gets into his armed truck and heads down da highway goin a hundred clicks an hour! Meanwhile, another dude in his car drives towards da guy at ninty clicks, when both of them suckers crash into each other! What is da name of da President of da US o' A? A) Dub-ya Bush, B) Slick willeh, C) RIIIIIICHARD NIXON, or D) Binky the Clown?
Irvine: Oh jee, ya gave me a tough one!
Squall: Sure did!
Irvine: Okaaay…Can I go to my momma in Georgia?
Squall: Sure can! Joey-Bob? Get Billy Bob's momma on da payphone!
Yuffie: Helloooooo Billy Bob!
Irvine: Hiya mommy! A B C or D?
Yuffie: Sorry, mommy's a bit drunk on hooch! What's the question?
Irvine: Who's da president of the US o A?
Yuffie: BINKY!
Irvine: Okkaaaay, Mommy says it's Binky!
Squall: You goin with your mommy's answer?
Irvine: Show me the beer! Show me the beer!
Squall: IT'S THE WRONG STINKING ANSWER! YOU LOOSE!
Irvine: WHAAAAAAT?
Drew: *Buzzes*
(They all return to their seats)
Drew: Well, that was just great. A million points to Squall for stepping out of character!
(Audience applauds, Squall just waves)
Irvine: Oh we'll be talking about this for weeks at garden…
Squall: ….
Drew: Well anyway, that was great. We got one more game left, it's Two-Line Vocabulary! This is for BM, Squall, and Irvine! *They walk out to the stage* What's gonna happen is these guys are going to act out a scene, but Squall and BM can only say two different lines. Squall, your lines are "Well THAT's not good", and "Can we go to lunch?". BM, your lines are "Should I stab it?" and "Maybe there's one in the closet." Now Irvine, you're a disgruntled priest, who is wedding the groom…
*Squall and BM look at Drew*
Drew: Black Mage to bride Squall!
(Audience cheers, Squall blushes)
Squall: Okay, you're going on the list Drew!
Drew: Yeah yeah, well remember I'm signing the checks! And go on ahead!.
Irvine: *Holds a pretend bible in his hands* We are gathered here on this most joyous occasion…
Squall: Can we go to lunch?
Irvine: Can I continue?
BM: Should I stab it?
Irvine: You mean your wife?
Squall: Well THAT's not good
Irvine: No it isn't good! Do you love this woman?
BM: Maybe there's one in the closet
Irvine: I'm trying to conduct a wedding here which has nothing to do with LOVE, please be quiet!
Squall: Can we go to lunch?
Irvine: *Groans* I'm taking no more chances, we're gonna do the short version! Do you take Princess Leonhart to be your lawfully wedded wife?
BM: Should I stab it?
Irvine: NO YOU SHOULDN'T STAB HER!
Squall: Well THAT's not good
Irvine: You mean you want to be stabbed by this maniac?
BM: Maybe there's one in the closet…
Irvine: What, a maniac?
Squall: Can we go to lunch?
Irvine: THE DOG ATE THE LUNCH!
BM: Should I stab it?
Irvine: Yes you should!
Squall: *Pouts* Well THAT's not good!
Irvine: MAKE UP YOUR DAMN MINDS!
BM: Oh, maybe there's one in the closet!
Irvine: ALRIGHT! The short short version! Do you?
Squall: Can we go to lunch?
Irvine: Do you?
BM: Should I stab it?
Irvine: Good, your married, KISS HER!
*BM and Squall..erm…pull a "Colin and Ryan" as Drew buzzes*
Drew: We'll be right back to Whose Line, the TV show with the most same-sex kissing on the air right after this!
Stay tuned, when we return with Elena, Zell, Wakka, and Seifer! R&R!
Irvine: ….Er…not really, no.
Drew: You were James Bond admiting he had a kid.
Irvine: Then shouldn't I have been admiting to more than one kid?
BM: Like five thousand man!
Drew: Well, anyway, that was great. No points, cause frankley, I COME FIRST WITH POINTS! HA HA!……anyways, moving along, another game for all four of you, the Millionaire Show! Squall, you're gonna be the host of a millionaire show, and Irvine's gonna be the contestant, BM's gonna be the friend in the audience, and Yuffie'll be the phone thing. But the snag is – This is the Redneck version of the millionaire show! Go ahead and start!
Squall: (Ready to eliminate his dignity -_-;;;) Well heylo y'all, and welcome to Who Wants Enough Beer to Last a Lifetime! Y'all gonna say hi to Billy Bob from lastday's show?
AUDIENCE: HEYLO BILLY BOB!
Irvine: Heylo, Faggits!
Squall: Now remember pardner, you're up to five hundred grand beers now! Two kestions to go! Are you readeh?
Irvine: Pardner, I was CONCIEVED ready!
Squall: Alrighty, for five hundred grand beers, What's the head city o Canada? A) EH? B) T'ronto, C) hottawah, or D) Pole-and?
(AUTHORS NOTE – Please take no offense to the mention of Canada. I'm Canadian myself ^_^)
Irvine: Oooo…gitty, that them's a tough question!
Squall: Do yeh wanna call up your mommy in Georgia, or do you wanna talk to your war buddy Joe Bob in the audience?
Irvine: I think I'ma go for my war buddy Joe Bob in the audience! Joe Bob?
BM: (Stands up the audience) Heeey Billy Bob!
Irvine: Joe Bob? A B C or D?
BM: *Hic* It might help if I knew the question?
Irvine: What's da capital of Canada?
BM: POLE-AAAND!
Squall: Well Billy Bob, he sez Poland, do y'all think that's right?
Irvine: I say yes!
Squall: YOU DIRTY STINKING ROTTEN SON OF A GUN! Yeah, YOU GOT IT RIGHT!
Irvine: WHOOOOOO! ^_^
(Audience applauds)
Squall: So you fetched your stinkin butt a half million beers? That's just sweller. Now for da top prize of a million beers, are you ready?
Irvine: I can taste mah liver shuttin down already!
Squall: For one million beers, here's da question- One hillbilly gets into his armed truck and heads down da highway goin a hundred clicks an hour! Meanwhile, another dude in his car drives towards da guy at ninty clicks, when both of them suckers crash into each other! What is da name of da President of da US o' A? A) Dub-ya Bush, B) Slick willeh, C) RIIIIIICHARD NIXON, or D) Binky the Clown?
Irvine: Oh jee, ya gave me a tough one!
Squall: Sure did!
Irvine: Okaaay…Can I go to my momma in Georgia?
Squall: Sure can! Joey-Bob? Get Billy Bob's momma on da payphone!
Yuffie: Helloooooo Billy Bob!
Irvine: Hiya mommy! A B C or D?
Yuffie: Sorry, mommy's a bit drunk on hooch! What's the question?
Irvine: Who's da president of the US o A?
Yuffie: BINKY!
Irvine: Okkaaaay, Mommy says it's Binky!
Squall: You goin with your mommy's answer?
Irvine: Show me the beer! Show me the beer!
Squall: IT'S THE WRONG STINKING ANSWER! YOU LOOSE!
Irvine: WHAAAAAAT?
Drew: *Buzzes*
(They all return to their seats)
Drew: Well, that was just great. A million points to Squall for stepping out of character!
(Audience applauds, Squall just waves)
Irvine: Oh we'll be talking about this for weeks at garden…
Squall: ….
Drew: Well anyway, that was great. We got one more game left, it's Two-Line Vocabulary! This is for BM, Squall, and Irvine! *They walk out to the stage* What's gonna happen is these guys are going to act out a scene, but Squall and BM can only say two different lines. Squall, your lines are "Well THAT's not good", and "Can we go to lunch?". BM, your lines are "Should I stab it?" and "Maybe there's one in the closet." Now Irvine, you're a disgruntled priest, who is wedding the groom…
*Squall and BM look at Drew*
Drew: Black Mage to bride Squall!
(Audience cheers, Squall blushes)
Squall: Okay, you're going on the list Drew!
Drew: Yeah yeah, well remember I'm signing the checks! And go on ahead!.
Irvine: *Holds a pretend bible in his hands* We are gathered here on this most joyous occasion…
Squall: Can we go to lunch?
Irvine: Can I continue?
BM: Should I stab it?
Irvine: You mean your wife?
Squall: Well THAT's not good
Irvine: No it isn't good! Do you love this woman?
BM: Maybe there's one in the closet
Irvine: I'm trying to conduct a wedding here which has nothing to do with LOVE, please be quiet!
Squall: Can we go to lunch?
Irvine: *Groans* I'm taking no more chances, we're gonna do the short version! Do you take Princess Leonhart to be your lawfully wedded wife?
BM: Should I stab it?
Irvine: NO YOU SHOULDN'T STAB HER!
Squall: Well THAT's not good
Irvine: You mean you want to be stabbed by this maniac?
BM: Maybe there's one in the closet…
Irvine: What, a maniac?
Squall: Can we go to lunch?
Irvine: THE DOG ATE THE LUNCH!
BM: Should I stab it?
Irvine: Yes you should!
Squall: *Pouts* Well THAT's not good!
Irvine: MAKE UP YOUR DAMN MINDS!
BM: Oh, maybe there's one in the closet!
Irvine: ALRIGHT! The short short version! Do you?
Squall: Can we go to lunch?
Irvine: Do you?
BM: Should I stab it?
Irvine: Good, your married, KISS HER!
*BM and Squall..erm…pull a "Colin and Ryan" as Drew buzzes*
Drew: We'll be right back to Whose Line, the TV show with the most same-sex kissing on the air right after this!
Stay tuned, when we return with Elena, Zell, Wakka, and Seifer! R&R!