A/N: Over 100 reviews! I never expected this. Hooray! This is the longest
chapter in the story so far, and it's my favourite!!! But they're still not
together offically though...not until Alwyn sorts herself out (and Legolas,
for that matter).
Part 19 - Love Is Not Easy To See
Alwyn leaned her head against the side of the carraige as it trundled along the path through Mirkwood. It would be a long journey, and Alwyn had time to think and contemplate. Her head was a muddle, and even though she tried to sort out her thoughts she still didn't understand what was going on. Did she hate him? No, certainly not. She had before, but he had been different then Shy, introverted, selfish. Now she had seen this side of him she wasn't so sure - he seemed somewhat caring, almost nice. Not like he had been in Rivendell. Alwyn wondered if she would ever see him again. She couldn't think of anything that would take her to Mirkwood again, unless she went to see her brother - but not too soon. No, it would be at least a year or two before she would meet Legolas again.
A glittering off to the side made Alwyn shout a stop to the driver. She got out of the carraige and, peering through the trees, she could see that they were driving past a huge sparkling lake. The sun glinted off it's surface and small ripples lapped at her feet as she stood looking out over the breezy water. Alwyn had never seen anything so beautiful. In the distance she could see the Mirkwood palace, and she took a deep breath. She guessed she was still in the grounds of the palace, and let out an amazed breath as she realised that her brother was now ruler of all this...
Alwyn called to the driver that she would be back in a little while, and, deciding that she had a bit of time to kill, began to walk around the edge of the large lagoon. Drooping willows framed the lake and hung over into the water, making little curtained sections of sheltered pools. Alwyn put up a hand and pulled aside the wilting willow branches, walking underneath and breathing in the cool air.
Somewhere in the distance she could hear a soft rushing noise, like water falling over rocks. She turned away from the lake and saw a small waterfall a little way off, with large glistening rocks, the clear crystalline water tumbling and splashing down over them. Alwyn approached and, as she had never been bothered with getting wet, walked up to the cascading falls and felt the water pounding down over her. She pulled back inside the cave behind the waterfall, but it didn't lead anywhere, so she came back out, wading out into the pool the waterfall made. Suddenly she stopped, as she had seen a figure up ahead.
Alwyn immediately recognised him. She tried to wade away, hoping he wouldn't notice her, but she stumbled and tripped, sitting right down in the pool with a loud splash. Legolas' head snapped up, and his mouth opened in an 'o' of surprise, before suddenly being replaced by a flicker of a grin. He daintily hopped onto a nearby rock and reached out a slender hand towards Alwyn.
"Here, my Lady," he said, and Alwyn scowled. She took it, however, and he pulled her up firmly. Alwyn was surpised at how strong he was for such a slight figured elf. Alwyn stood in front of him, soaked to the skin, and her hair dripping. "If I may ask," he said smiling, "what are you doing?"
"I decided to take a walk, and then thought I would see what was behind the waterfall," she answered, and couldn't help but smile as well. Legolas raised an eyebrow.
"I see," he said, and leaped down from the rock. Alwyn followed, and she sat down in the sun to dry off. Legolas sat next to her, and they both stared off into the distance for a while.
"I have been thinking," Legolas said, quietly, and Alwyn glanced at him.
"About what?"
"About what you said, before you left," he replied, still looking into the distance. Alwyn found herself studying his blue eyes. 'Oh lord, Alwyn. Stop it!' she thought. 'You're going all gooey'.
"What do you mean?"
"You asked if I loved Aribeth," Legolas said, and he looked around at her. Alwyn quickly looked off at the palace so he wouldn't know she had been staring. "And I have realised that I don't."
Alwyn sniffed, but Legolas didn't notice. She felt her stomach wrencing, but didn't know why. Perhaps it was the thought of never seeing him again.
"Alwyn, if you're thoughts are what they were last year then say now," he said suddenly, and Alwyn closed her eyes.
"They are not. I am ashamed of how I acted, also," she said.
"I distinctly remember you telling me, that you 'would not marry me if I were the last elf in Middle Earth'!" he said, and Alwyn let out a chuckle.
"Please do not remind me what I said then!" she said, and Legolas grinned.
"You also said, that there was 'nothing I could do to make you say yes'," he said, still smiling.
Alwyn suddenly went quiet, and looked at him. Her voice was almost a whisper. "You remember everything I said?" she asked, and Legolas paused before looking away. His voice was also soft.
"How could I forget. I will never forgive myself for acting how I did. I was selfish, proud and ignorant, and I did not have the sense to see it. I knew deep down that you could not stand me as I was," he said.
"Then...that's why you changed?" Alwyn said, tiny tears of sympathy brimming in her icy eyes. "For me?"
"I changed for you, and you alone."
Alwyn went silent. She closed her eyes and a small tear fell, resting on her pale cheek. Suddenly she felt Legolas' finger brushing it away, and then felt him trace his hand down her cheek. It travelled up to her ear and he tucked a stray bit of hair behind it. Alwyn reached up and took his hand, and they sat silently, their hands entwined, resting between them on the soft grass.
They sat for a long while, and then the sun began to set. Alwyn noticed the sky had gone a beautiful shade of copper orange. Alwyn glanced at Legolas, and saw his glittering blue eyes through the darkness fixed on her face. Suddenly Alwyn stood, distressed.
"Oh! I left the carraige! Harleth will be angry," she turned to Legolas and opened her mouth as if to say something, but thought better of it and began to walk backwards. Legolas darted forward and took her hand again.
"Where are you going? Come back to the palace!"
"No, I can't, I told Harleth I would be back before dark...I have to go home."
"But, Alwyn!"
"I'm sorry!" she called, before hurrying away through the trees. Legolas stood helplessly, gazing after her into the darkness.
"I will never see her again," he whispered to himself, and the breeze ruffled his hair, blowing across the calm lake in the twilight.
Part 19 - Love Is Not Easy To See
Alwyn leaned her head against the side of the carraige as it trundled along the path through Mirkwood. It would be a long journey, and Alwyn had time to think and contemplate. Her head was a muddle, and even though she tried to sort out her thoughts she still didn't understand what was going on. Did she hate him? No, certainly not. She had before, but he had been different then Shy, introverted, selfish. Now she had seen this side of him she wasn't so sure - he seemed somewhat caring, almost nice. Not like he had been in Rivendell. Alwyn wondered if she would ever see him again. She couldn't think of anything that would take her to Mirkwood again, unless she went to see her brother - but not too soon. No, it would be at least a year or two before she would meet Legolas again.
A glittering off to the side made Alwyn shout a stop to the driver. She got out of the carraige and, peering through the trees, she could see that they were driving past a huge sparkling lake. The sun glinted off it's surface and small ripples lapped at her feet as she stood looking out over the breezy water. Alwyn had never seen anything so beautiful. In the distance she could see the Mirkwood palace, and she took a deep breath. She guessed she was still in the grounds of the palace, and let out an amazed breath as she realised that her brother was now ruler of all this...
Alwyn called to the driver that she would be back in a little while, and, deciding that she had a bit of time to kill, began to walk around the edge of the large lagoon. Drooping willows framed the lake and hung over into the water, making little curtained sections of sheltered pools. Alwyn put up a hand and pulled aside the wilting willow branches, walking underneath and breathing in the cool air.
Somewhere in the distance she could hear a soft rushing noise, like water falling over rocks. She turned away from the lake and saw a small waterfall a little way off, with large glistening rocks, the clear crystalline water tumbling and splashing down over them. Alwyn approached and, as she had never been bothered with getting wet, walked up to the cascading falls and felt the water pounding down over her. She pulled back inside the cave behind the waterfall, but it didn't lead anywhere, so she came back out, wading out into the pool the waterfall made. Suddenly she stopped, as she had seen a figure up ahead.
Alwyn immediately recognised him. She tried to wade away, hoping he wouldn't notice her, but she stumbled and tripped, sitting right down in the pool with a loud splash. Legolas' head snapped up, and his mouth opened in an 'o' of surprise, before suddenly being replaced by a flicker of a grin. He daintily hopped onto a nearby rock and reached out a slender hand towards Alwyn.
"Here, my Lady," he said, and Alwyn scowled. She took it, however, and he pulled her up firmly. Alwyn was surpised at how strong he was for such a slight figured elf. Alwyn stood in front of him, soaked to the skin, and her hair dripping. "If I may ask," he said smiling, "what are you doing?"
"I decided to take a walk, and then thought I would see what was behind the waterfall," she answered, and couldn't help but smile as well. Legolas raised an eyebrow.
"I see," he said, and leaped down from the rock. Alwyn followed, and she sat down in the sun to dry off. Legolas sat next to her, and they both stared off into the distance for a while.
"I have been thinking," Legolas said, quietly, and Alwyn glanced at him.
"About what?"
"About what you said, before you left," he replied, still looking into the distance. Alwyn found herself studying his blue eyes. 'Oh lord, Alwyn. Stop it!' she thought. 'You're going all gooey'.
"What do you mean?"
"You asked if I loved Aribeth," Legolas said, and he looked around at her. Alwyn quickly looked off at the palace so he wouldn't know she had been staring. "And I have realised that I don't."
Alwyn sniffed, but Legolas didn't notice. She felt her stomach wrencing, but didn't know why. Perhaps it was the thought of never seeing him again.
"Alwyn, if you're thoughts are what they were last year then say now," he said suddenly, and Alwyn closed her eyes.
"They are not. I am ashamed of how I acted, also," she said.
"I distinctly remember you telling me, that you 'would not marry me if I were the last elf in Middle Earth'!" he said, and Alwyn let out a chuckle.
"Please do not remind me what I said then!" she said, and Legolas grinned.
"You also said, that there was 'nothing I could do to make you say yes'," he said, still smiling.
Alwyn suddenly went quiet, and looked at him. Her voice was almost a whisper. "You remember everything I said?" she asked, and Legolas paused before looking away. His voice was also soft.
"How could I forget. I will never forgive myself for acting how I did. I was selfish, proud and ignorant, and I did not have the sense to see it. I knew deep down that you could not stand me as I was," he said.
"Then...that's why you changed?" Alwyn said, tiny tears of sympathy brimming in her icy eyes. "For me?"
"I changed for you, and you alone."
Alwyn went silent. She closed her eyes and a small tear fell, resting on her pale cheek. Suddenly she felt Legolas' finger brushing it away, and then felt him trace his hand down her cheek. It travelled up to her ear and he tucked a stray bit of hair behind it. Alwyn reached up and took his hand, and they sat silently, their hands entwined, resting between them on the soft grass.
They sat for a long while, and then the sun began to set. Alwyn noticed the sky had gone a beautiful shade of copper orange. Alwyn glanced at Legolas, and saw his glittering blue eyes through the darkness fixed on her face. Suddenly Alwyn stood, distressed.
"Oh! I left the carraige! Harleth will be angry," she turned to Legolas and opened her mouth as if to say something, but thought better of it and began to walk backwards. Legolas darted forward and took her hand again.
"Where are you going? Come back to the palace!"
"No, I can't, I told Harleth I would be back before dark...I have to go home."
"But, Alwyn!"
"I'm sorry!" she called, before hurrying away through the trees. Legolas stood helplessly, gazing after her into the darkness.
"I will never see her again," he whispered to himself, and the breeze ruffled his hair, blowing across the calm lake in the twilight.