The Screwed up Mind of a House Elf
written by: happy kid
i do not own any thing, JKR does (
Chapter 4: House Leaders and Death Omens
The Halloween feast was something that everyone was looking forward to, although Dumbledore was very worried about another food poisoning attack.
Fred and George were planning to sneak into the kitchens again, thinking that they could catch whoever had poisoned McGonagall's food while they were in the act. One hour before the feast started, they went down to the kitchens. As usual, the mob of happy house elves came up to them. They refused to take any of their food though, just in case it was poisoned too.
"Whoa, okay, okay. calm down guys. We're only here to. watch you, um, cook the dinner. Um, so. continue!"
The house elves went on preparing food for the next fifteen minutes, but as the sixteenth minute approached, (I don't know why it was 16 minutes. it doesn't matter. o well) the twins heard the same voice coming from behind a shelving unit on the far side of the kitchen.
Fred went to investigate (ooooo.. he's investigating..) while our buddy George stayed and watched the rest of the elves. They were very busy.
He crept under the tables to the other side so that the elf behind the shelves wouldn't see him.
"Ouch" He was stopped though when a piece of his hair got caught on a sticky substance on the underside of a table. "o well, I've got to keep moving."
When he reached the shelving unit, (does anyone else think that's a funny word?) he heard Dobby mumbling something. He couldn't quite pick up many words though.
".yes, yes. a little bit of that, a pinch of that. here we are. there."
Just then Dobby walked back to a table to the right of the shelving unit. There, he poured the ingredients he obtained into a small mixing bowl, which already had a potion boiling in it, and began to stir them together.
For another twenty minutes, Dobby mixed the potion, occasionally going back to the shelving unit to gather more ingredients. Finally, when the potion seemed to be done, Dobby sighed and sat down on a nearby stool. Fred looked at the bowl. The outcome was a greenish-brown muck, much like the Polyjuice Potion. He concentrated on the image of the bowl in his mind to make sure that he wouldn't forget what the potion looked like.
By now, the students were starting to come into the Great Hall. Fred knew that he must go back to George now. But, as he was turning around, Dobby got up from the stool, and walked back over to the shelving unit. He took down a small medal box, unlocked it, and started vigorously rummaging through it. Fred wanted to know what he was looking for, but at that moment he saw George motioning for him to come back.
The house elves were too busy getting the food prepared that they didn't notice the twins leaving. When Fred and George got back upstairs, everyone was already seated. They hurried back to the Gryffindor table just in time for the food to be served.
After the very delicious meal of chicken pot pie, (mmmm. my favorite!) they retreated to the common room, where Fred told George what he had seen.
George looked puzzled. "Why would he be making that? He certainly wouldn't want to be making a Polyjuice Potion, or would he?"
Just then (Harry's turn today) Harry, Hermione, and Ron walked in.
"Why were you guys late for dinner?" asked Ron. The twins looked at each other.
"Um, well.. Okay, we snuck into the kitchens again."
Hermione looked astonished. (I don't know why though.) "What were you doing down there then? You couldn't have been there for food, because dinner was right after. So why were you?"
"We were trying to see if the person or elf who was poisoning McGonagall would 'strike again' " said both the twins at once.
"Oh.. Did it work? Did you catch the culprit?" said Ron, who was getting very annoyed with the twins. (He seemed to be often.)
"Actually." Fred and George both take turns explaining to the three what happened in the kitchens. The three looked as confused as George had.
"Okay, don't really get it, but that doesn't matter. You did a nice job of attempting to explain the situation anyway," said Hermione in a fake sweet voice... (get the voice? ..um.. okay. example: 'aww look at how cute that puppy is!' something cute, but sarcastic, there we go.. okay, if you got what I was saying, sorry you had to read through all this ( ). "Now we have something to tell you guys. This might disturb you, or you may be happy." She glanced at Harry and Ron for encouragement, like she wasn't sure whether to say what she was going to say or not. Instead, Harry took the job.
"Ok.. Snape has been elected the leader of Gryffindor house."
The whole world crashed for Fred and George. No way could Snape be head of two houses at once! Well, it could be possible. It doesn't take much to run a house, though. All you have to do is inform the students about upcoming events and take points away from other houses.
Hermione tried to cheer them up a bit. "Well, it's not like he's going to wreck Gryffindor house; he can't do that much!" She paused to think of another thing.. "Oh, and he can't take points away from us, well. he won't want to as much anymore."
The twins didn't look much better. "Damn," said the two at the exact same time again, and they stumped off to their dormitories.
"Well, we tried," said Harry.
"Hey, it's their fault they missed it! They were in the kitchens trying to find the stupid person who poisoned McGonagall! They wouldn't have been as shocked if they learned about it from Dumbledore instead of us!" cried Ron.
"Just let it drop! There's nothing we can do now, except barge into Dumbledore's office and command him to let someone else to take the job.. face it, we're stuck with Snape and there's nothing we can do about it!"
But she was wrong. Both boys thought that barging into Dumbledore's office sounded like a good plan. Hermione disapproved though. "We have to think of a plan, if there is one, that we can get evidence or something that Snape SHOULD NOT be our house leader! I know! Let's make a list of things that we could do!"
Harry and Ron groaned at her over-organization skills, but if they had to do this to get Snape out, they were going to.
They sat there thinking for another three hours, until their brains hurt from thinking too hard. Hermione made Harry write down all her ideas, since Ron just sat there nodding or shaking his head. Harry just sat there writing, and occasionally offering up ideas that weren't that great. Well, in the end, their list looked a little like this:
Force Dumbledore, at wand-point, to make Snape leave. Gather the whole Gryffindor house to go on strike. Kill Snape. (that was Ron's idea) Kill Dumbledore. (Harry wrote that one down just because that was REALLY ridiculous.) (A.N: that would be so sad ( *tear* *tear*) Gather the whole Gryffindor and Slytherin houses together to go on strike. Gather the whole Gryffindor and Slytherin houses together to form a petition. Gather the whole school to form a petition. Find out how Snape got the job, and try to see if there were any flaws in the process.
That was as far as they got because, after a whole three hours, they found themselves asleep on the comfortable common room chairs.
The same situation was with the twins. They continued discussing both matters, the poisoning and Snape issues, until two in the morning. Finally, they went to bed after a long day of investigating (ooooo, investigating).
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They awoke at the sound of a death-threatening voice booming through the common room.
Snape was standing on a chair shouting at people to wake up.
" I know that it is Saturday, but that doesn't mean a thing to me. You will be getting up at this time everyday, for the rest of your stay at Hogwarts, which for some of you might not even last this week. Get up you sleepy heads! (heehee, that definitely wouldn't be something that Snape would say, but I threw it in there anyway..) There is a Quittich match today at 11:00, so hurry up and get ready!"
"Against who?" said Harry in a groggy voice.
"Hufflepuff against Ravenclaw, silly boy! Don't you think you would know if you were playing a Quittich match today?!? This is going to be harder than I thought."
The trio looked at each other with bright eyes. Of course! They could just be so obnoxious that Snape would retire from the job! Why hadn't they thought of that before?!?
But, then Dumbledore would be notified of the bad behavior, and they would all be punished. The excitement of the idea ran out when they thought about it more. It wouldn't work. he would just take points away from Gryffindor.. Why should he care? He has his real house to take care of.
Fred and George woke up at the booming voice too. They had only gotten five hours of sleep, (you do the math for what time it is..) so they were slow to get ready for the match. At 9:30, they still had to eat, dress, and prepare their practical joke items. The only thing they had done so far was showered. (i'd love to have a really long shower, and still have hot water at the end of it. any one else have that problem?...)
The Quittich game lasted only fifteen minutes, with Ravenclaw the obvious winner with 180 points to 10. Hufflepuff was used to this though, as their Quittich team was nothing more than people riding around on brooms in the air, not knowing what they were doing. The only person who knew what he was doing was pretty-boy Cedric Diggory. (I'll leave it at that for those who haven't read the fourth book.. heehee)
When Monday came, it was time for Professor Trelawney again. Harry was very worried that she might want to talk to him again about dying. He still didn't understand why she wouldn't talk to Dumbledore about it. Maybe she had.
After the class was all settled in and working, Trelawney, to Harry's great disappointment was asked to talk with her again. She told him that she was very proud of the class, even if some of them were struggling a bit. She also said that, if she wasn't seeing death omens in her orb, that she would have applied for the job of Gryffindor head of house. She went on and on about dying and that she was sorry. She even showed Harry the death omen in her orb.
Again, by the time that they were finished talking, or that she was finished talking, the bell was ringing and it was time to go. Harry told Ron and Hermione what happened, and they weren't at all surprised that she was sorry etc. But, they were angry at the fact that they could have had Trelawney over Snape as their leader. Hermione was convinced that Trelawney was telling the truth for once, but Ron deeply disagreed.
"Her, telling the truth! I dunno 'mione, I think she just wants us to feel sorry for her." Hermione flushed red as he said her name. Harry just laughed. He didn't know what to make of it.
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Dumbledore's voice reached through the hall. "It is my great pleasure to introduce to you, the new Transfiguration and Head of Gryffindor House. Madam Dance (pronounced something like donkey but an "a" instead of an "e", with the accent on the "kay" part). The whole Gryffindor table cheered as if they had won the house cup. Snape looked like he could have killed Madam Dance.
The new teacher wasn't that bad after all. They learned a lot of new things, and some old, but this had to be one of their favorite classes now. Or maybe they liked her because she had taken the place of Snape.hmmmm
Christmas break came, and since there weren't any big events going on, most students left. The only people who stayed in the whole Gryffindor house were. ahem. Ron, Hermione, Harry, Lavender, Parvati, Fred, and George. Parvati and Lavender stayed just so that they would be there is Trelawney passed. As it turned out, Trelawney stopped seeing death omens, so on the first day of break, Parvati and Lavender left.
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One day at dinner, George noticed that Fred wasn't there. He also hadn't been at lunch, but they had figured he was still asleep.
After dinner, the Gryffindor group started searching the castle for any sign of Fred. But after searching for hours, they gave up.
"Maybe he took the train back home," said Hermione.
"Nah, he would have told me! Guys, is really bad. We are almost never (that's a funny phrase) apart, and when we are, we always tell each other." George really looked distressed.
"Let's go to Dumbledore!"
There was a sigh of relief as Hermione said that. Everyone sprinted towards his office and started yelling out names of candy until the door opened. But it did not open because they had said the right password; it opened because someone was coming out of the stairwell. It was Fred.
dun dun dunnnnnnn..whoah.. what was Fred doing in Dumbledore's office? Why did he disappear? What's with dobby? Can we trust the new Transfiguration teacher? . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ... . . . . . . . . Find out next time on: The Screwed up Mind of a House Elf!
-hey thanks to Margarita Mocha and Marina for reviewing! yay! to all you other ppl. review!!!! heehee. thanks everyone! hope you liked this chapter! I'll try to get the next one up in a few days. thanks!
written by: happy kid
i do not own any thing, JKR does (
Chapter 4: House Leaders and Death Omens
The Halloween feast was something that everyone was looking forward to, although Dumbledore was very worried about another food poisoning attack.
Fred and George were planning to sneak into the kitchens again, thinking that they could catch whoever had poisoned McGonagall's food while they were in the act. One hour before the feast started, they went down to the kitchens. As usual, the mob of happy house elves came up to them. They refused to take any of their food though, just in case it was poisoned too.
"Whoa, okay, okay. calm down guys. We're only here to. watch you, um, cook the dinner. Um, so. continue!"
The house elves went on preparing food for the next fifteen minutes, but as the sixteenth minute approached, (I don't know why it was 16 minutes. it doesn't matter. o well) the twins heard the same voice coming from behind a shelving unit on the far side of the kitchen.
Fred went to investigate (ooooo.. he's investigating..) while our buddy George stayed and watched the rest of the elves. They were very busy.
He crept under the tables to the other side so that the elf behind the shelves wouldn't see him.
"Ouch" He was stopped though when a piece of his hair got caught on a sticky substance on the underside of a table. "o well, I've got to keep moving."
When he reached the shelving unit, (does anyone else think that's a funny word?) he heard Dobby mumbling something. He couldn't quite pick up many words though.
".yes, yes. a little bit of that, a pinch of that. here we are. there."
Just then Dobby walked back to a table to the right of the shelving unit. There, he poured the ingredients he obtained into a small mixing bowl, which already had a potion boiling in it, and began to stir them together.
For another twenty minutes, Dobby mixed the potion, occasionally going back to the shelving unit to gather more ingredients. Finally, when the potion seemed to be done, Dobby sighed and sat down on a nearby stool. Fred looked at the bowl. The outcome was a greenish-brown muck, much like the Polyjuice Potion. He concentrated on the image of the bowl in his mind to make sure that he wouldn't forget what the potion looked like.
By now, the students were starting to come into the Great Hall. Fred knew that he must go back to George now. But, as he was turning around, Dobby got up from the stool, and walked back over to the shelving unit. He took down a small medal box, unlocked it, and started vigorously rummaging through it. Fred wanted to know what he was looking for, but at that moment he saw George motioning for him to come back.
The house elves were too busy getting the food prepared that they didn't notice the twins leaving. When Fred and George got back upstairs, everyone was already seated. They hurried back to the Gryffindor table just in time for the food to be served.
After the very delicious meal of chicken pot pie, (mmmm. my favorite!) they retreated to the common room, where Fred told George what he had seen.
George looked puzzled. "Why would he be making that? He certainly wouldn't want to be making a Polyjuice Potion, or would he?"
Just then (Harry's turn today) Harry, Hermione, and Ron walked in.
"Why were you guys late for dinner?" asked Ron. The twins looked at each other.
"Um, well.. Okay, we snuck into the kitchens again."
Hermione looked astonished. (I don't know why though.) "What were you doing down there then? You couldn't have been there for food, because dinner was right after. So why were you?"
"We were trying to see if the person or elf who was poisoning McGonagall would 'strike again' " said both the twins at once.
"Oh.. Did it work? Did you catch the culprit?" said Ron, who was getting very annoyed with the twins. (He seemed to be often.)
"Actually." Fred and George both take turns explaining to the three what happened in the kitchens. The three looked as confused as George had.
"Okay, don't really get it, but that doesn't matter. You did a nice job of attempting to explain the situation anyway," said Hermione in a fake sweet voice... (get the voice? ..um.. okay. example: 'aww look at how cute that puppy is!' something cute, but sarcastic, there we go.. okay, if you got what I was saying, sorry you had to read through all this ( ). "Now we have something to tell you guys. This might disturb you, or you may be happy." She glanced at Harry and Ron for encouragement, like she wasn't sure whether to say what she was going to say or not. Instead, Harry took the job.
"Ok.. Snape has been elected the leader of Gryffindor house."
The whole world crashed for Fred and George. No way could Snape be head of two houses at once! Well, it could be possible. It doesn't take much to run a house, though. All you have to do is inform the students about upcoming events and take points away from other houses.
Hermione tried to cheer them up a bit. "Well, it's not like he's going to wreck Gryffindor house; he can't do that much!" She paused to think of another thing.. "Oh, and he can't take points away from us, well. he won't want to as much anymore."
The twins didn't look much better. "Damn," said the two at the exact same time again, and they stumped off to their dormitories.
"Well, we tried," said Harry.
"Hey, it's their fault they missed it! They were in the kitchens trying to find the stupid person who poisoned McGonagall! They wouldn't have been as shocked if they learned about it from Dumbledore instead of us!" cried Ron.
"Just let it drop! There's nothing we can do now, except barge into Dumbledore's office and command him to let someone else to take the job.. face it, we're stuck with Snape and there's nothing we can do about it!"
But she was wrong. Both boys thought that barging into Dumbledore's office sounded like a good plan. Hermione disapproved though. "We have to think of a plan, if there is one, that we can get evidence or something that Snape SHOULD NOT be our house leader! I know! Let's make a list of things that we could do!"
Harry and Ron groaned at her over-organization skills, but if they had to do this to get Snape out, they were going to.
They sat there thinking for another three hours, until their brains hurt from thinking too hard. Hermione made Harry write down all her ideas, since Ron just sat there nodding or shaking his head. Harry just sat there writing, and occasionally offering up ideas that weren't that great. Well, in the end, their list looked a little like this:
Force Dumbledore, at wand-point, to make Snape leave. Gather the whole Gryffindor house to go on strike. Kill Snape. (that was Ron's idea) Kill Dumbledore. (Harry wrote that one down just because that was REALLY ridiculous.) (A.N: that would be so sad ( *tear* *tear*) Gather the whole Gryffindor and Slytherin houses together to go on strike. Gather the whole Gryffindor and Slytherin houses together to form a petition. Gather the whole school to form a petition. Find out how Snape got the job, and try to see if there were any flaws in the process.
That was as far as they got because, after a whole three hours, they found themselves asleep on the comfortable common room chairs.
The same situation was with the twins. They continued discussing both matters, the poisoning and Snape issues, until two in the morning. Finally, they went to bed after a long day of investigating (ooooo, investigating).
--------------
They awoke at the sound of a death-threatening voice booming through the common room.
Snape was standing on a chair shouting at people to wake up.
" I know that it is Saturday, but that doesn't mean a thing to me. You will be getting up at this time everyday, for the rest of your stay at Hogwarts, which for some of you might not even last this week. Get up you sleepy heads! (heehee, that definitely wouldn't be something that Snape would say, but I threw it in there anyway..) There is a Quittich match today at 11:00, so hurry up and get ready!"
"Against who?" said Harry in a groggy voice.
"Hufflepuff against Ravenclaw, silly boy! Don't you think you would know if you were playing a Quittich match today?!? This is going to be harder than I thought."
The trio looked at each other with bright eyes. Of course! They could just be so obnoxious that Snape would retire from the job! Why hadn't they thought of that before?!?
But, then Dumbledore would be notified of the bad behavior, and they would all be punished. The excitement of the idea ran out when they thought about it more. It wouldn't work. he would just take points away from Gryffindor.. Why should he care? He has his real house to take care of.
Fred and George woke up at the booming voice too. They had only gotten five hours of sleep, (you do the math for what time it is..) so they were slow to get ready for the match. At 9:30, they still had to eat, dress, and prepare their practical joke items. The only thing they had done so far was showered. (i'd love to have a really long shower, and still have hot water at the end of it. any one else have that problem?...)
The Quittich game lasted only fifteen minutes, with Ravenclaw the obvious winner with 180 points to 10. Hufflepuff was used to this though, as their Quittich team was nothing more than people riding around on brooms in the air, not knowing what they were doing. The only person who knew what he was doing was pretty-boy Cedric Diggory. (I'll leave it at that for those who haven't read the fourth book.. heehee)
When Monday came, it was time for Professor Trelawney again. Harry was very worried that she might want to talk to him again about dying. He still didn't understand why she wouldn't talk to Dumbledore about it. Maybe she had.
After the class was all settled in and working, Trelawney, to Harry's great disappointment was asked to talk with her again. She told him that she was very proud of the class, even if some of them were struggling a bit. She also said that, if she wasn't seeing death omens in her orb, that she would have applied for the job of Gryffindor head of house. She went on and on about dying and that she was sorry. She even showed Harry the death omen in her orb.
Again, by the time that they were finished talking, or that she was finished talking, the bell was ringing and it was time to go. Harry told Ron and Hermione what happened, and they weren't at all surprised that she was sorry etc. But, they were angry at the fact that they could have had Trelawney over Snape as their leader. Hermione was convinced that Trelawney was telling the truth for once, but Ron deeply disagreed.
"Her, telling the truth! I dunno 'mione, I think she just wants us to feel sorry for her." Hermione flushed red as he said her name. Harry just laughed. He didn't know what to make of it.
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Dumbledore's voice reached through the hall. "It is my great pleasure to introduce to you, the new Transfiguration and Head of Gryffindor House. Madam Dance (pronounced something like donkey but an "a" instead of an "e", with the accent on the "kay" part). The whole Gryffindor table cheered as if they had won the house cup. Snape looked like he could have killed Madam Dance.
The new teacher wasn't that bad after all. They learned a lot of new things, and some old, but this had to be one of their favorite classes now. Or maybe they liked her because she had taken the place of Snape.hmmmm
Christmas break came, and since there weren't any big events going on, most students left. The only people who stayed in the whole Gryffindor house were. ahem. Ron, Hermione, Harry, Lavender, Parvati, Fred, and George. Parvati and Lavender stayed just so that they would be there is Trelawney passed. As it turned out, Trelawney stopped seeing death omens, so on the first day of break, Parvati and Lavender left.
----------------
One day at dinner, George noticed that Fred wasn't there. He also hadn't been at lunch, but they had figured he was still asleep.
After dinner, the Gryffindor group started searching the castle for any sign of Fred. But after searching for hours, they gave up.
"Maybe he took the train back home," said Hermione.
"Nah, he would have told me! Guys, is really bad. We are almost never (that's a funny phrase) apart, and when we are, we always tell each other." George really looked distressed.
"Let's go to Dumbledore!"
There was a sigh of relief as Hermione said that. Everyone sprinted towards his office and started yelling out names of candy until the door opened. But it did not open because they had said the right password; it opened because someone was coming out of the stairwell. It was Fred.
dun dun dunnnnnnn..whoah.. what was Fred doing in Dumbledore's office? Why did he disappear? What's with dobby? Can we trust the new Transfiguration teacher? . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ... . . . . . . . . Find out next time on: The Screwed up Mind of a House Elf!
-hey thanks to Margarita Mocha and Marina for reviewing! yay! to all you other ppl. review!!!! heehee. thanks everyone! hope you liked this chapter! I'll try to get the next one up in a few days. thanks!