Silent Words, Comfort me
Author's note: Sigh. I'm going to miss this story, but with several upcoming real life commitments, I might not have much time to write anymore…at least for the next few 2 months or so. I didn't want to leave it hanging, so this is going to be the last real chapter of Silent words, Comfort me.
Heartfelt thanks to everyone who has read this, hope you enjoy this one too.
Standard disclaimers apply.
Chapter 5
Legolas blinked, and the mass of seething brown slowly resolved itself into a door of dark grained wood. He blinked again, and saw the quiet figure standing in front of it.
The man watched him steadily, then, satisfied that he had the elf's attention, reached up and pulled the helmet from his head. Tossing it carelessly into a corner, he folded his arms across his chest and waited.
Legolas stared right back. He had done everything within his power to avoid exactly this scene, and since Aragorn had decided to force a confrontation, let him be the one to set its tone.
The silence stretched between them. Just when it seemed someone or something had to give, Rainchaser snorted, and chose that moment to answer a pressing call of nature.
Startled, Aragorn jumped away from hissing stream, falling ungracefully backwards. The elf hastily turned Rainchaser around, struggling to contain his mirth. Finally, the absolute incongruity of the scene drove the laughter from their mouths, and ringing peals filled the air.
Wiping tears from his eyes, Legolas slid off the horse, and walked over to where Aragorn still lay laughing. Offering his hand, he pulled the man to his feet.
The moment passed, and as the merriment faded from Aragorn's eyes, Legolas felt the grin fall from his face. He tried to withdraw his hand, but Aragorn held it tight.
"Were you going to leave?" he asked softly, "Just like that?"
"I left a note," Legolas replied weakly.
The hand around his tightened and Aragorn pulled him briskly behind him into the guardroom within the watchtower. Releasing him, he turned and locked the door, then slammed a fist into the wood.
Legolas jumped at this display of temper, but said nothing. After all, he had long ago said everything that had to be said.
"How could you do it?" the man asked, his words filled with quiet, but growing rage.
"It had to be done," Legolas said calmly.
Aragorn's eyes flashed, and in an instant, he'd caught both the elf's wrists, palm upwards, in his own. "You belong to me," he growled gutturally.
Legolas' temper flared briefly. "I belong to no one," he snapped back.
"Oh really?" The man arched an eyebrow and brought the hands to his lips, one after another. Bending over them, his tongue moved delicately over the half-moon curves that still seeped blood, tracing them, caressing them...
The elf gasped, and swayed on his feet. What would he not give to be able to surrender to the fire that burned within him at his touch…But he couldn't; they both had duties that could only be fulfilled apart - to their lands, to their people…
But not to each other? whispered that treacherous voice in his head.
"NO!" The word startled Aragorn sufficiently for him to slip free, and he backed as far away from the man as he could manage to in that tiny room, trembling as he struggled to regain control. "I have to leave," he said, pleading with the man to understand, "You know that."
The anger ran out of Aragorn like water burst from a dam, and he slumped against the door, drained and tired. Sighing, he turned and faced the elf, sorrow threaded through his voice. "I suppose I do," he said. Burying his face in his hands, he sank slowly to the floor. "It's just…sometimes, I wish…"
Though he still felt as though his skin was about to burst from trying to contain the feelings within him, Legolas managed to cross the distance between them and kneel beside the man. "I understand," he said simply, slender fingers running ever so lightly across his cheek. Aragorn watched the elf, sudden hunger flaring in his eyes.
Catching Legolas' hand, he pulled him downwards, and kissed him brutally. The elf stiffened as the cut across his lower lip broke open again, spilling salty blood into their mouths, the warmth washing right through him…
"Stop that," Legolas said abruptly, breaking away, "You only make the parting harder."
"Stay with me," Aragorn said, his tone caught between command and plea.
"That's impossible," he replied instantly, "You would have to forsake your kingdom…"
"Yes," he answered without hesitation.
"Your people."
"Yes."
"Your name."
"Yes."
"Your betrothed."
A pause. Aragorn looked at him, and Legolas thought he would lose himself in the swirling emotions that stirred inside.
"Arwen is the woman I love best…" he admitted. -
Legolas gently pulled away, reaching for the door in front.
- Aragorn wound his arms tightly about the elf's waist and forced him back towards him.
"…but you are the one I love most," he said, holding onto the elf as if he would never, ever let him go.
Closing his eyes, Legolas relaxed into the embrace. Though he might never again feel those arms around him, the words were enough to see him through the endless years ahead.
"Thank you," he whispered.
"For what?" Aragorn asked.
"Everything…"
As the remnants of the night slowly bled away, they lay silently together, aware that they might never hold each other so again.
"Marry her," Legolas said suddenly, breaking the peace that they had let themselves be lulled into.
"What?" asked Aragorn in disbelief.
Legolas sighed and turned to face him. "You were going to anyway - but wait a year before you do. She deserves a husband whom, when he looks at her, sees only her."
"But…" he protested.
Legolas silenced him with a pointed look. He knew the thoughts running through the man's head; how many times had they run through his own? "You need your heirs," he said, not unkindly, "The Reunited Kingdom needs her kings."
Gently disentangling himself from Aragorn, he stood. "So…" he continued, "Marry her," like I can never be with you. "Cherish her," like I wish I could cherish you. "Love her," like I will always love you.
He opened the door to the room. -
- And closed the door to his heart.
"Wait," Aragorn said, desperately searching for anything to keep the elf beside him one moment longer. Sifting through the items in his tunic pocket, he twined the evenstar about its chain and held it out to him.
Legolas stared at it, then reached out and closed his hand over the man's, the jewel held in both their grasps. Shaking his head, he said, "Keep it. It was given to you."
"Take this then," Aragorn said hurriedly, drawing a large silver ring from his finger and placing it onto the elf's.
Legolas smiled, and inclined his head graciously in acceptance. Pushing the door open, he took one step forward. As his foot crossed the threshold, Aragorn's voice came from behind him.
"Will I ever see you again?" he asked.
Legolas hesitated, and turned to look at him over his shoulder. "Perhaps," he said, "perhaps."
Jumping lightly onto Rainchaser's back, he clucked his tongue and walked the horse to the gate.
As the sun's first rays touched the earth, Legolas urged his horse into a gallop. With every second that passed, he grew further and further away from his beloved in so many ways - but none that really mattered.
~
The sun was high overhead when Legolas caught up with them.
"You're back," Gimli said in a decidedly disappointed tone, not exactly delighted to see him.
Legolas shrugged and herded Rainchaser gently into line. The dwarf protested and moved towards him, but something in his face stopped him in his tracks.
The elf was not happy, but he was…resolved, and perhaps, at peace.
"You'll got it sorted out then?" Gimli asked him gruffly, attempting, and failing miserably, to hide the concern in his voice.
"Yes," Legolas replied, his right index finger gently tracing the curve of the ring on his left.
Just before he was out of earshot, he heard Aragorn cry, "I will always love you."
Legolas smiled a smile Aragorn couldn't see. Until the earth cradles you in her womb, and even beyond…forever. "I've never stopped loving someone once I started," he called back, tears streaming unnoticed down his cheeks, "And I don't think I ever will."
Legolas looked up, with an expression so filled with joy and pain and sweet, sweet sorrow it dazzled Gimli and all that looked upon him. "Yes."
Silent words.
Comfort me.
© ai 2002
Please don't kill me yet, there's still the epilogue. :)