Disclaimer - I don't own Digimon.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO ALL CANADIANS!!! ^0^

Warning: Yamato is partly OOC in this fic. Why? First, he was raised in a different family. Secondly, this family is very stable and he lives with his siblings and such, unlike in the series. So, you may see some differences within him.

Unspeakable
Chapter 4: Hollow Desire

You two are so weird.

At the startle of an unforeseen voice, my eyes shot open from the light sleep I must have been in. Hikari stood before the bed, looking both confused and curious. She was frozen in place, as if awakening her two brothers was a crime. Summoning some sort of strength, she told us of breakfast ready to be served, and had left the room abruptly.

For a few awkward moments, Taichi and I remained silent, as if there wasn't a need for sound. Oh, how there was.

Taichi pushed at my back as he eased himself from the place between my body and the wall. I merely watched as he did his routine of scratching his stomach, searching for clothes on the floor, and began making his way out of our room. It baffled me that he could act so casual, as if nothing out of the ordinary had occurred the previous night



Taichi paused, although he didn't turn around. A few minutes crawled by, mainly filled with the sounds of breakfast being prepared in the next room.

You said we would talk about it in the morning, I said, scolding myself mentally for sounding so pathetic. My voice sounded so child-like. Innocent. Too naïve for my own good.

What is there to talk about? Taichi asked.

I began, hesitant to find the right words and something to say. What occurred isn't normal.

It may not have been, but that doesn't declare it speakable.

Then when will we speak about it?

Taichi sighed and his hand fell to his side. He sighed once more and shook his head slightly. I don't know.



He decided to leave the room, deserting me with the guilt of the fornication that occurred in our bedroom. There may have been no penetration, but it wasn't exactly something considered normal in society. I just knew it had felt very, very lovely to have happened to my body. Just as it had with other lovers of mine, but it seemed so much more than an occasional fuck

Perhaps that was another reason it was deemed unspeakable?

***

Yo Mato!

I rolled my eyes and turned to find the rather annoying fan of mine, Shun. He seemed to find pleasure in greeting me by only using my name. I couldn't be more annoyed at Taichi, who was the one to come up with it in the first place and had carelessly said it in front of Shun. Now there was no mercy of it ever ceasing.

Hey Shun.

He slipped his arm around mine and grinned broadly. I have a proposition for you.

Sighing, I asked, Will I want to hear it?

Doesn't matter.

What kind of answer is that? All right, tell me what your proposition is. And if it's trying to become a member of my band by fucking me, it isn't going to work, I said dryly.

You had no complaints fucking me a month ago, he said, still grinning madly.

For a moment, I wanted to slap it off his face, but thought better to. Besides, I knew he was right. Not that I actually had any feelings for him. He was just another attractive male in the world.

So anyway, I hear your going to the club on Saturday and I was hoping l could actually accompany the Yo Mato.

I merely rolled my eyes and leaned into Shun's embrace. You just want to fuck me, I taunted.

He laughed and shook his head. Now Yamato, what do you take me for?

A slut, I said truthfully.

And you aren't one? he teased. Glancing at his wrist, he said, I gotta fly! See you Saturday!

I frowned as I watched him descend. Many people did consider me the insult he mentioned because of my fondness for the male body. It wasn't a secret that I was gay, nor did I try hiding it. The people who were bothered must have hid it or were plotting some horrible incident against me; the people who didn't care were either the girls that still chased me endlessly, loving the fact that I was gay, or were the guys who wanted a piece of me.

Hello? Ya-ma-to! Hello!

I blinked at the hand waving in my face and looked up at Shou's tall frame.

You okay?

Besides having a sexual encounter with my brother, fine. I mentally slapped myself. As if I could say that. I'm fine.

he said, because I don't want you to be upset about the gig.

I'm not. So where's everyone else?

At Kenta's locker. I left because Taichi is there, Shou said.

It always amazed me by his bluntness in disliking Taichi. Why do you hate my brother?

Shou shrugged. If you want to go see them, don't feel hesitant to ditch me.

Actually, why don't you and I step outside?

If Shou was surprised, he didn't show it. There was something about Shou that I always found peculiar. He always had this deeper understanding that I could relate to, which caused me to become rather fond of him.

Besides that, I couldn't face Taichi right now. If he thought he was going to act normal around me at school and not talk about our situation, then he must be dreaming.

***

A good portion of the day was spent avoiding Taichi. It wasn't easy because of our classes together, but I managed it at lunch when he sat with his soccer buddies. Several times, I had felt his eyes leering on me, but I never made an attempt to make eye contact with him. After school, I didn't wait for him like I usually would and walked home by myself. It was rather lonely. People all around were laughing with their friends and deciding what to do next. The solitude was uncalled for at such a time, yet everything I was going through with Taichi caused me to feel opposite to that. It was like having the flu: being hot and cold at the same time.

As I approached the door of my family's flat, it suddenly opened. Taichi's warm smile filled the short period of awkwardness between us.

Sorry I didn't wait for you, but I couldn't find you so I left.

A lie. I frowned but nodded, for Taichi's smile was far too convincing. He walked inside the empty apartment and I followed him, studying his physique from behind. All that he wore was a blue towel around his waist as he walked into our bedroom.

Taking showers after school is unlike you, I said, taking a seat on my bed.

I have a date with Nanami tonight. He grinned into the mirror so that I could see it in the reflection.

I laid back onto my pillow and propped my head with my arms tucked underneath. Glancing over, I watched Taichi prepare for his date.

He walked to our closet and pulled out two of his shirts. Which do you think I should wear? The black or blue?

Depends on the colour of pants.

I'm wearing my black ones.

Then wear the black shirt. It'll make you look mysterious and sexy. A lump formed in my throat as Taichi slipped the shirt on. It was even proceeding to be more difficult of a task to breathe as Taichi let the towel drop to the ground, allowing his shirt to lightly cover his naked bottom half.

Why do you do this to me? I asked, unable to keep my voice from wavering.

Do what?

I whispered. My hand motioned to his body and I couldn't help but glance downwards.

Taichi had the nerve to laugh at me. Didn't think you were so intrigued by my body.

I said nothing. I simply watched as he bent forward, bearing his naked body to my eager gaze, searched through the pile of clothes on the floor for boxers, and covered his flesh with a pair of boxers that belonged to myself.

The one thought that came to mind from all of this was that I would not wash those boxers when Taichi returned in the morning.

Hey, mind if you go away?

I snapped my head up to find him fully dressed with a smile on his face. Excuse me?

Nanami is coming here and since Mom, Dad, and Hikari are off to the movies, I was hoping you would leave too.

I wouldn't mind, I said, willing myself to not add because I don't want to hear you fucking Nanami whilst being in the next room'. I have a band practice tonight anyway.

It was the truth. I had almost forgotten until Taichi mentioned his wanting to have the flat to himself.

Give my greetings to Shou, would you?

I stared at him, too baffled to think of anything to say. A good few minutes must have passed before I blinked. Was that a sarcastic remark?

Taichi turned from the mirror he had been brushing his hair in. That's for you to figure out.

Before leaving to meet my band mates, I stayed inside the room whilst my brother was preparing for his date. I stared at him with full admiration. Admiration that led to an adoration. Adoration that led to absolute desire.

Desire to have my brother take me like he would with Nanami.


End of Chapter 4


Oooh the next chapter is so much fun! ^^