Part 34:
"What are you thinking about?" Spike asked Buffy. The pair had walked to the Slayer's house in total silence, and sat down on the steps of the porch.
"Riley," The slayer answered.
"What about him?" Spike asked.
"He's so young. I mean, he can't be more than nineteen, and he's a shoulder. He thinks that he's doing the right thing. I looked in his eyes and he honestly thinks that he's saving somebody, that the mayor and Professor Walsh are helping him fight evil," Buffy answered.
"That's got you down, the fact that the boy doesn't know that he's in over his head?" Spike asked skeptically. He'd known the slayer long enough to know that almost every problem great enough to render her silent required some probing to get to.
"No," Buffy admitted honestly, "what if what I'm doing…being the slayer, fighting demons. What if I'm sitting around thinking that I'm doing the right thing, when really I'm the bad guy?"
"You can't be serious," Spike said.
"I am."
"Buffy, look at me," Spike said, taking the slayer's small hands in his own, "what you do is wonderful, and righteous, and important. You're a good person, and you do the right thing. The mayor is evil; you're not. What you do, who you are. You help people."
"But how do I know…" The slayer began, however Spike cut her off with a searing kiss.
When Spike pulled away from the kiss he rested his forehead on Buffy's and spoke to her softly.
"You do something amazing. And I am so proud of you." The slayer nodded in response to Spike's words.
"I'm proud of you too," Buffy whispered.
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"I'm going to tell them," Buffy announced to Spike. The slayer had gone to visit him before she began school and before even saying hello she had come out with that startling declaration.
"What are you talking about love?" Spike asked, taking the slayer's hand and leading her to the courtyard where they took seats around a fountain.
"I've been thinking a lot. About what you said, and about what Giles said. You were right. I fight evil. But I can't do it alone. I can't leave Giles in that tiny cell. He's fine now, yeah, but who knows what will happen next week. If we're going to stop the mayor from whatever evil goal he has in mind we're going to need help. I need my friends. I don't fight evil. We fight evil," Buffy explained, staring strait into Spike's eyes.
"Then we'll tell them," The vampire said, smirking slightly.
"Thank you," Buffy whispered, getting up to leave.
"One more thing," Spike yelled after the slayer, causing her to turn around, "When we see Giles today remind me to tell him that you're amazing," Spike requested.
"I won't let you forget."
"How could I?"
Perhaps love is the process of me leading you gently back to yourself.
~Antoine de Saint Exupery~