I Really Do Believe That I Don't Belong Here

Chapter Four – Love Isn't Selfish

By Lindsey Ann

Author Notes:  I just got a new computer. And, I'm just amazed about how many reviews you guys have been giving! 21 for only three chapters makes my heart soar. My birthday is coming up; I know that the gift of reviewing will contribute to much of the happiness. Weird right? Someone also mentioned that I should add separators during scenes, so I'll be doing that when you see : ------- assume a new scene is starting, okay?

Summary: Ginny Weasley has always been unsure about herself, especially when it comes to the fact that she belongs in Gryffindor. In a long talk with Draco Malfoy, she starts to think he actually does act like a person, and that maybe she belongs in Slytherin.

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The first thing that was on Ginny's mind when she woke up was, Draco Malfoy. He had often now become the center of her mind; anything she did seemed to revolve around him.

Over the days that she had gotten to know Draco, she had seen a side she had never seen before. A caring side, that no matter how stupid her conversations were, kept coming back to hear more. She wondered why he would continue to keep on listening to her – It was a shock for Ginny. That Slytherins had feelings, feelings that were deep and true – it was just that they didn't show them well – well, to others besides their own kind. Why were they so secretive? Why couldn't they act like humans, normal witches and wizards, just like the others? If a Gryffindor was sad, he or she would act sad, not like a Slytherin who would continue to go on pretending that nothing was wrong, still acting proud and cocky as ever.

Ginny hummed to herself the same song her mother used to sing to her, not to long ago, in fact right before she came to Hogwarts; Ginny couldn't hide the fact to her mother that so many things were going inside of her. She could never exactly describe the feeling she had for Harry Potter – the boy who lived – was it love or just great compassion for? She couldn't hide the fact that she was afraid of Lord Voldemort. She had spent countless times crying to her mother that it wasn't fair about You-Know-Who killing everyone. She had even once cried right there in front of Harry Potter about You-Know-Who coming back, it was overwhelming.

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It was only 6:15 A.M. Oh I have so long until I can give Draco his present. Will he like it? Ginny thought to herself as she approached the Gryffindor common room. No one was up yet. Now would be a good time to

head to the library.

Draco Malfoy eagerly got up and probably for the first time in his life that he was nervous, almost to the point of not knowing how to hide being nervous. It was funny, but the truth, Slytherins didn't easily show emotion. Not even the girls could admit in any degree that if it was one thing Hufflepuff excelled in that they didn't it was showing emotion. Many Slytherin girls didn't date early on, showing their feelings were downright impossible. It was a surprise that Pansy Parkinson had asked out Draco last year. It was almost imaginable.

He had gotten a gift for Ginny and had wrapped and grabbing off of his desk he shuffled out through the dormitory and out of the Slytherin commons and out of the dark, dingy dungeon.

He had thought all night what he was going to do. He was going to give Ginny the gift. And well the rest was up to destiny. He had no control over if she would like it; there wasn't a spell or a gold galleon in the world that could make anybody like something. But he did wish there was, then everyone would like him.

Draco Malfoy was thinking the same thing, heading to the library that in fact the two met while walking. "You're up early," he said startling Ginny who had been a few feet in front of him, her eyes on the ground. She flashed Draco a smile.

"Yeah, you are too. For a second there I thought you were Hermione," Ginny said. If it had been Hermione then, well, that would have been the end of all of the visits with Draco, and she would never have been able to have given Draco his gift. And not to mention that not only would she have gotten a speech from Hermione, but she would have gotten one from Ron.

Sometimes Ginny wished that Ron wouldn't treat her like a baby. Wouldn't always be protective of her, she was a little kid; she was a young woman, who was ready to face the world.

"If I was that Granger girl, I'd say something like 'off to study at the library, Ginny? We could read Hogwarts a History together!'" Draco said pretending to be Hermione has he frizzled up his hair, Hermione did have frizzy hair, that was the truth.

"And then I would reply, 'No, Hermione, you can. I have stuff to do.' And then I'd run off." Ginny said. The words that she was saying were rude and harsh, but Hermione was a bookworm, and in the eyes of a Slytherin, a mudblood. That meant that she was muggle born, that her parents couldn't cast a spell to save their lives. Even though Ginny considered Hermione a good friend, she had to admit that if only Hermione would think of fun things to do, then she'd be way cooler.

Draco laughed. Ginny seemed so genuine, so different from how had always expected her to be. A poor, pathetic geek, but she wasn't that she was a fun-loving young woman, who like many young women had her own opinions and her own dreams.

"Ginny, do you ever think about getting married?" Draco asked rather abruptly. It was an odd question, especially from a guy who was her friend, and nothing more than that. The thought saddened Draco, but then made him happy; it was extremely difficult to understand.

Ginny gave a funny look at Draco. She giggled softly. "Every once in a while I think about it," she said truthfully. In a house full of guys she had no one to talk about marriage and dating, especially when they were immature boys who lived in her house. She felt good talking about something she didn't have a lot of opportunity to talk about it. It was like lifting up a burden deeply in her soul. "I want a sleeveless white dress that glitters when you walk in the sunlight with a long train following it. I want a tiara of sterling silver and diamonds in my hair." She said. She had every detail in her head. She began to blush, "And…," she was too embarrassed to continue with what she was going to say.

"And?" Draco asked.

"I want a man to marry me someone who I truly will love and cherish in sickness and in health. I want a house full of kids, three boys and three girls. Daniel, Luke, and Joshua for the boys names. Kelly, Hallie, and Sarah. Sounds stupid, right?"

"How is wanting something so much stupid?" He asked as looked into Ginny's eyes. It was as if time had stopped. Ginny looked stunning right there at him smiling back weakly, not knowing what to say exactly. Even in confusion, she looked beautiful. What was he saying?

"It isn't then," She said as she slipped her right hand into his hand, the fingers intertwined. "What about you? Have you thought about marriage?"

Draco nodded softly as he tightly squeezed Ginny's hand. "Yeah but I won't until I know You-Know-Who is gone for sure, I don't want to have kids, to have someone that I cherish so much, to have to grow up with knowing who You-Know-Who is and being confused."

"Confused?"

"Yeah, just like I am. Confused. I don't know what side to side with; I mean I love my parents, should I side with the dark lord? But... there are reasons that I don't want to side with the dark lord." He said. His voice sounded almost far-off.

"You shouldn't base your things on what your parents want you to do what they do. You shouldn't be different just because others want you to be like that," Ginny said. "If they loved you, they'd realize that's what you want and they should appreciate the decision. Love isn't selfish."

"Where did you learn that, Ginny?"

"I learned it from a girl who works with Percy. She's absolutely gorgeous and she's head-over-heels for Percy, but Percy doesn't notice that she likes him. He's too into Penelope Clearwater to notice. But I don't think that Penelope loves him," she said. "Guys are hopeless in that area. It's so weird." She noticed she was moving off-topic. "She gave me a paragraphs worth what love was. It was like she knew everything, had everything, except that."

"That's weird."

"I know." Ginny said as the two got to the library. Before the opened the doors Ginny said, "Merry Christmas." As if it had slipped her mind before, that seeing Draco made her mind think of different things.

"Yeah, Merry Christmas, Virginia," Draco said as he handed her a small rectangular shaped present. It was wrapped in gold wrapping paper, very neatly, with red ribbon scattered about. Ginny took the gift from his hand as if it was precious gemstone. There was a card on it.

Merry Christmas, Virginia.

-Draco

The handwriting was surprisingly neat, unlike Ginny's brother's handwriting. Carefully she teared off the wrapping paper, and opened the box. In it was a glimmering necklace. It was sterling silver cross with gold edges. It must have costed a fortune! Why would Draco spend so much on her? She took it out carefully. "Can you help me get it on?" She asked Draco. He nodded.

His soft bare hands touched Ginny's neck as he fastened the necklace. Emotions surging within the two.

"Even though I said, I didn't need anything, you got me something." Ginny said. Draco nodded. "That's very sweet. Now it's my turn. Close your eyes." He closed them.

Softly Ginny took his hand and began to lead him.

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She was glad the Gryffindor commons was empty. "Sit," she said softly.

"Can I open my eyes now, Ginny?"

"Yeah." He did as she saw her holding out a picture. "It's of your mom at this exact window seal." He looked out of the window, the view was breathtaking. And his mother had sat here, in this window seal, sitting there! It was the best gift he could have had. He didn't know what had come over him when he hugged Ginny.

"That's the best gift I've ever gotten. It's like I know her now." He said as he remained in their embrace.

"Virginia Weasley!" Were the next words that the two had heard. And they didn't sound like good words either.

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Did you guys like that chapter? Notice it was a little longer. I'm proud of myself. 21 reviews. Anyways onto the normal stuff…

Myrtle, aww thanks for the review! Is this really that sweet? I think I have a thing for writing sweet fanfics.

The Blue Mandrake, aye, aye captain I'll write more!

Deamons-daughter, *blushes* Thanks for that comment. I really am a good writer? Wow, that means a lot to me!

Dannie7, I'm going to ask my friend who knows way more about Harry Potter than I do. I'll see what she gives me as an answer (if you're right, than thank you ahead of time for correcting me.)

Themis, I don't think the stories been uploaded yet. Oh, I am so anxious to see what your story is like!

Slytherinangel922, machos gracias for the review. I'm writing more as we speak.

Txt-eva, thanks for saying this is original. J

Lady Ginny, oh cool, I made you a Ginny and Draco shipper! I love it when we get more followers. This is my favorite pairing. I think quick is spelt q-u-i-c-k.

Gold Red Phoenix, yes I'm working on making this longer. Got any suggestions that could lengthen the chapters? Cool name!

Gin, *smirks at the romance comment* Hmm thanks for answering that question. Also next chapter is going to be more in-depth on Draco's mum, so your question will be answered then. Don't worry, I won't make you wait long. ^^

Janiko, sure I can do that. I did the separators this time through, is it easier to understand? I'll have to e-mail you in like a minute to tell you I uploaded this.

Kpstar25, thanks for the comment.

Sarah, soon as you write that story gimme the link okay? Thanks for loving this story. *hearts in eyes, You really love me, you really love me!*