What's going on at the Slaughterhouse? Dare we ask?
Back at the Base
That same night back at the Slaughterhouse Sarge looked around. "Have you seen any of the Renegades Roadblock?"
"Not a hide or hair of them," Roadblock said, "Come to think of it, I haven't seen Shipwreck either."
"They took off didn't they?" Sarge groaned.
"Yeah and some of the kids must have went with them," Roadblock sighed. "Should we go after them?"
"Are you crazy?" Sarge looked at them. "We need a break! Who's still here?"
"Toad, Wavedancer, the Triplets and the baby," Roadblock said. "Of course Low Light and Cover Girl are here. And Spirit's here as well."
"Yeah I saw him," Sarge said. "He's telling the girls stories and the baby is out like a light."
"What's going on?" Cover Girl asked as she and Low Light entered the room. "Where is everyone?"
"They've gone AWOL except us saps," Roadblock sighed. "Where's Toad and Wavedancer?"
"I dunno they're around here somewhere," Low Light sighed. "Uh oh!"
"Yeah uh oh," Realization hit Roadblock. They all got up.
"They gotta be around here somewhere!" Low Light looked around. He tried a door and found it locked. "I think I found them!" He kicked down the door. "Oh for crying out loud!"
There was Todd and Althea on the floor. Todd had one of Althea's nightgowns on over his pajamas. Althea was sitting on his lap with her arms around him.
"What are you two doing?" Cover Girl yelped.
"Truth or Dare?" Todd gulped.
"Oh for crying out loud!" Roadblock groaned. "Take that thing off!" He yanked the nightgown off Todd. Todd yelped and covered himself before he realized he was still wearing clothes. "ALTHEA!"
"Well it's not like we were naked or anything," Althea said. "We were only cuddling and snooching."
"You were what?" Roadblock's voice went higher.
"Snooching," Todd said. "I'll show you," They both rubbed noses together. "Just that!"
"You mean Eskimo kissing," Cover Girl groaned.
"Yeah but we didn't like that name so we came up with snooching," Todd said. "I made it up myself."
"I don't believe you two!" Roadblock snapped.
"Why?" Althea said. "We weren't doing anything wrong. Just showing some affection for each other. It's not like we…oh ran off base or anything!"
"Yeah!" Todd said. "We stayed on base like good little soldiers!" They tried to make innocent faces.
"They do have a point," Cover Girl said.
"Whose side are you on?" Low Light snapped.
"Just wait until your father gets back," Roadblock said.
"If he isn't drunk," Althea pointed out. "Or arrested."
"You know they really do have a lot of good points," Roadblock sighed.
"So what do we do about this?" Low Light asked.
"Come on," Cover Girl said. "Let's you and I supervise those two. Sarge and Roadblock can handle the rest."
"Oh yeah you in charge of them," Low Light grumbled. "That's real comforting considering your track record!"
"So I happen to have an active love life!" Cover Girl snapped. "At least I have one!"
"Will you two stop it now, before you get into a flaming row!" Roadblock snapped.
"Yeah you're supposed to be setting an example for us children," Todd said innocently.
"Just watch them!" Roadblock groaned as he and Sarge left the room. "We'll be on the lookout for the others."
"Well what do you kids want to do?" Cover Girl asked.
"How about we play Truth or Dare?" Todd said.
"A G rated version of course," Althea said.
"That doesn't sound too bad," Cover Girl said.
"We are not going to play Truth or Dare," Low Light said. "G rated version or not!"
Ten minutes later…
"Okay who goes first?" Low Light sighed as they sat on the floor.
"Ooh! Ooh! I'll go!" Todd raised his hand.
"Fine," Low Light sighed wondering what sins he had committed in a previous life to deserve this.
"Okay ummm…Althea!" Todd said. "Truth or dare?"
"Dare," Althea grinned.
"I dare you to…" Todd thought. "Switch the candy hidden under Red Dog's bed with laxatives!"
"Easy," Althea ran to the bathroom and snuck upstairs. She came back down. "Done!"
"You have an evil streak in you," Low Light said to Todd. "I like that."
"Truth or dare?" Althea asked Cover Girl.
"Truth," Cover Girl said.
"Are you still dating Mr. McCoy?" Althea asked.
"Hey!" Cover Girl snapped. "I thought these questions were G rated!"
"I only asked if you were still dating him," Althea said. "I didn't ask about your sex life!"
"That would be an NC-17 rating easy," Low Light chuckled.
Cover Girl glared at him. "No," she admitted. "It was fun for a while, but it was never anything serious. Okay Low Light, truth or dare?"
"Dare," Low Light grinned.
"I dare you to go the Sarge, say 'I love you man' and hug him" Cover Girl smirked.
"Are you nuts?" Low Light bristled. "What happens if I don't?"
"Then we get to do something humiliating to you," Todd grinned.
"Fine!" Low Light stomped away, knowing how demented they were. The others followed. He took a deep breath as he entered the living room.
"What is it Low Light?" Sarge asked. He and Roadblock were sitting down.
"I love you man!" Low Light grabbed him in a huge bear hug. He then ran away as fast as he could.
"Roadblock," Sarge asked in a stunned voice. "Low Light doesn't drink does he?"
"He didn't until he joined this outfit," Roadblock said.
"HA!" Low Light said when he got back. "Okay! My turn sister! And boy have I got a good one for you!"
"Then I take your dare!" Cover Girl smirked. "Bring it on!"
Five minutes later Cover Girl came out to the living room with some pom poms. She stood in front of Roadblock and Sarge. "GIVE ME A J! GIVE ME AN O! GIVE ME AN E! YO JOE! YO JOE! WHOOPIE!" She danced around waving them. Then she gave each of them a peck on the cheek and ran back out.
"Okay what was that?" Roadblock asked.
"I dunno," Sarge said. "But I'll take that over Low Light every day."
Low Light came out and knelt down behind the couch. Out came a sock puppet. "We represent the Lollypop Guild! The Lollypop Guild! The Lollypop Guild! We represent the Lollypop Guild! We wish to welcome you to Munchkin Land!" He sang in a funny voice.
Spirit walked in the middle of the song. He looked extremely puzzled as he watched the spectacle. Low Light ran out again. He stared at Roadblock and Sarge. They gave him equally blank looks. Then Cover Girl ran out with a blanket around her neck proclaiming she was Superwoman. She climbed the sofa and a few tables and ran back out.
"Okay what the hell was that?" Spirit asked.
"I don't know," Roadblock said. "But I can't wait to see how they're gonna top that one."
Low Light came out next. He spent the next several minutes making shadow puppets as well as animal noises. Not long after he left Cover Girl came out with a feather boa and sang 'Let Me Entertain You.' The three men watched both performances with stunned looks.
"I tell you nothing beats live entertainment," Roadblock said.
"I'll go make some popcorn," Spirit walked into the kitchen.
"I don't know what they're on but I want some," Sarge said.
A noise outside got their attention. "That will be them!" Sarge sighed. "Do you want to read them the riot act?"
"Let's see how sober the majority of them are," Sarge sighed.
Pietro ran in first. "Hi!" He said cheerfully. "We had fun! They took us into town where we got snacks!"
"Pietro painted the town," Wanda said. "Literally."
"And we got into a bar fight," Fred said.
"And Wanda and Tauros totally trashed a kiddy ride!" Lance said.
"All in all a dull evening?" Sarge said sarcastically. "Okay who's sober?"
"We all are," Mercer groaned. "Unfortunately. Those kids wore us out before we could do anything!"
"Do I take it the town is still standing?" Roadblock asked.
"Barely," Mercer groaned. "Don't ask. Let's just say we may not ever go back there again. And it wasn't all the kid's fault."
"I figured as much," Roadblock groaned.
Then Low Light and Cover Girl came out with makeshift grass skirts. "Aloha oe!" They started to sing and hula dance. "Aloha oe…"
"It's official," Mercer groaned as they performed. "The kids have driven us all crazy!"
"And you were asking if we were sober?" Shipwreck asked Sarge.
"I have a plan. If the cops show up here we never saw any of these people before in our lives," Sarge grumbled.
Next up: Time for some action! Cobra attacks! Again!