Sleepover Insanity

"I hope we aren't making a mistake about this," Hank sighed. All the adults were in the kitchen after dinner.

"Well they didn't kill each other at dinner," Low Light said. "That's a good sign."

"Yeah but things were a bit tense," Cover Girl said. "And not just with our kids. Is it my imagination or is there something going on with Kitty and Peter?"

"I'm afraid there was a bit of an incident prior to our meeting again," Hank sighed. "Let's just say that some members of the X-Men are having romantic problems and leave it at that."

"Oh goody," Shipwreck groaned. "Why do I have a feeling tonight is going to be anything but quiet?"

************************************************************************

"Well this is going to be a fun evening!" Pietro laughed. The male Misfits were camped out in Pietro's room.

"Oh yeah," Lance grumbled. "A sleepover with my worst enemies and my ex-girlfriend. A dream come true."

"You are just not thinking creatively," Pietro grinned.

"What are you up to?" Lance asked.

"Nothing special," Pietro put on an innocent face.

"Yeah right," Fred folded his arms.

Xi then walked in. "All the boys are washing up in the gym bathroom now," He told them. The house now had several bathrooms due to the amount of people. The gym bathroom was the largest and had shower accommodations for seven people.

"Why did you want to know that?" Todd asked. "Pietro what are you up to?"

"Hey Xi," Pietro grinned. "How would you like to help us with a little prank or two?"

"What do you have in mind?" Xi asked.

"Oh if it is what I think it is…" Todd began.

"It's gonna be hilarious," Lance grinned.

"What is?" Althea stuck her head in. "I want in!"

"No way!" Pietro snapped.

"Now wait a minute Pietro," Lance rubbed his chin in thought. "Why not get two birds with one stone?"

"Does this plan include Polly and Freedom?" Fred rubbed his head.

"No it includes Xi," Pietro said. "They're not yet aware of his little secret. Would you mind telling them Xi?"

"Not at all," Xi grinned, liking the idea.

************************************************************************

"This isn't so bad," Remy said after he showered and dried himself off with the towel.

"It's going to be a disaster," Scott grumbled as he dried himself off. "Just wait and see."

"Aw you're too paranoid Scott," Bobby was getting dressed. "What could those losers do to us?"

"Hopefully we won't find out," Kurt was trying to get the shampoo out of his fur.

"I don't think they'll do anything too bad," Peter was finishing getting dressed.

"I'm not worried," Ray sniffed as he showered.

"That's good to know," Xi's voice could be heard among them.

They all jumped. "Okay where are you?" Scott snapped.

"I'm here," Xi told them, still invisible. He snapped a towel at Scott and Remy and changed the water temperature on Ray and Kurt.

"YIKES!" Ray screamed, slightly sparking.

"Watch it Ray!" Bobby leapt out of the way.

"You nearly electrocuted us!" Kurt snapped as he popped out of the stall and grabbed a towel.

"That's not funny Xi!" Scott snarled.

"Come on out where we can see you ya little lizard boy!" Remy snapped. "Gambit want you to reappear right now!"

"If you insist," Xi reappeared before them, completely naked.

All the X-Men gasped in shock. "That ain't no boy!" Ray screamed in a very high voice.

"WHAT THE…?" Scott yelped.

"Mein gott!" Kurt yelped, his jaw going slack.

"Holy…" Bobby gasped.

Peter tried to say something but all that came out was a squeak. "A…ahhhhh?"

"Put something on!" Remy screamed, throwing a towel at Xi.

"What's wrong?" Xi grinned ignoring it. "Don't like what you see?"

"XI!" The X-Men screamed as they tried to cover themselves up. "YOU'RE A GIRL! GET OUT OF HERE!"

Instinctively Kurt teleported. Unfortunately he teleported outside the hallway where Althea and Wanda had rounded up all the X-Girls. "AAAAGGGH!" He teleported back to the showers. Of course Wanda grabbed his towel just before he left.

"Oopsie," She giggled holding it.

"Wanda…" Rogue growled as more terrified screams could be heard from the shower.

"What's going on in there?" Kitty ran in. "OH MY GOD!"

"KITTY YOU GET OUT OF HERE TOO!" Kurt whined.

Immediately all the girls ran into the shower room. "What is all the racket…." Rogue shouted. Then she saw Xi. "About?"

"Oh my," Amara blinked.

"What the hell…?" Jean gasped at the sight.

"Ooh, Miss Perfect said a bad word," Althea laughed. By now all the Misfits were in the shower room as well.

"Xi is a girl?" Kitty yelped.

"Look again idiot," Rogue said. "That ain't a girl."

"She's right," Kitty blinked.

"How can he not be a she?" Kurt gasped. He had retrieved another towel, "He…she doesn't have a…you know? A thingy!"

"A thingy?" Rogue raised an eyebrow. She then turned to the Misfits who were laughing like crazy. "All right you jerks what's going on?"

"Xi's not a boy," Althea snorted.

"Or a girl," Pietro snickered.

"You mean…he ain't a he, but he ain't a she either?" Remy blinked. "Okay Gambit now is confused."

"What is all the racket…" Logan walked in and saw the scene. "Holy… WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?"

"Logan what's all the…?" Hank walked in. "Oh my stars and garters!"

"Let me guess," Roadblock walked in with the Professor following. "You've all just figured out that Xi doesn't have a gender do you?"

"No gender?" Remy asked.

"Xi was created in a Cobra laboratory," Xavier explained. "Hence, 'his' lack of sexual organs."

"That means I don't have the same desires as you do," Xi explained.

"So you're not a boy or a girl, but they call you a he?" Amara asked.

"It's just easier," Wanda shrugged. "It's amazing how fast you get used to him."

"Okay all of you," Roadblock growled at the Misfits. "Very funny."

"It sure was!" Althea roared.

"Well I think later on we should all have a little discussion about this," Roadblock said in a serious voice. "Especially what you did to Xi!"

"Oh come on Roadblock it was a harmless prank," Lance said. "And Xi didn't mind! Did you Xi?"

"If I didn't want to do it, I wouldn't have done it," Xi admitted. "It was a good plan Pietro."

"Thanks a lot squealer," Pietro rolled his eyes.

"We would have figured out it was you anyway," Roadblock said. "Let's just call it a day! All of you get ready for bed! Get 'em some extra bedclothes Fred. Like we said before, Boys upstairs, girls downstairs."

"Wait a minute," Kurt said. "Where is Xi going to sleep?"

"With us," Todd said.

"But he's not a he…" Kurt yelped.

"Yeah," Bobby said.

"So?" Pietro looked at him. "Just pretend he's a he!"

"Isn't that a little….weird?" Scott gulped.

"Oh for crying out loud Scott!" Rogue snapped. "It's not like Xi's going to attack you or anything. He won't right?"

"If it's that big a problem Xi can sleep with us tonight," Althea said.

"No he can't!" Scott snapped. "He's…well…she's….Xi's not a girl!"

"Well we're not gonna make Xi sleep alone!" Wanda snapped.

"Yeah it's not fair!" Daria snapped.

"But he…she…" Scott stammered, clearly uncomfortable with the situation.

"Oh relax Scott we don't mind if Xi stays with us," Jean said. "If we can get along with the Triplets we can put up with Xi."

"Besides," Rogue smirked. "If you think we're gonna pass up a golden opportunity to get some dish on the guys you are wrong!"

"There is that," Jean smiled.

"JEAN!" Scott whined.

"Oh ignore him," Althea gave Xi a bathrobe. "Come on girls, let's party!"

"Let's not!" Roadblock and the other adults followed them out in order to attempt to win a losing battle.

"Don't worry Summers," Lance told him. "When it comes to stuff like this Xi's just like a little kid! Trust me on this!"

"I'd sooner trust a Sentinel," Scott snapped at him. "You guys have pulled some pretty low stunts in the past, but this takes the cake!"

"Oh calm down Summers. It's not like we hurt anyone," Lance defended.

"Are you nuts?" Scott snapped. "We nearly got killed when Ray nearly lost it!"

"Hey almost only counts in horseshoes and hand grenades," Pietro told him. "Besides it's not our fault if Sparky here can't control his powers!"

"I am so embarrassed," Kurt wailed.

"Relax Elf," Todd patted him on the back. "I know exactly how you feel. I pretty much found out the same way. Man that was embarrassing! And to top it off, Althea ran in on us…Oh man. I can laugh about it now, but boy was I red! I mean I felt like crawling into a little tiny hole and die!"

"Ya that's the feeling," Kurt grumbled.

"I knew this was a mistake," Scott snapped.

"Yeah we should have known if Scott was right about anything it was about you clowns," Remy snapped.

"Look who's talking!" Pietro snapped. "Who turned traitor first? Not that we blame you as far as Magneto's concerned but still…"

"Listen you prissy little…" Remy growled.

"Prissy? PRISSY?" Pietro screeched. "Who are you to call me that?"

"Actually that is pretty accurate," Fred said. "But only we're allowed to call you that."

"I AM NOT PRISSY!" Pietro shouted.

"You are a prissy egotistical jerk, that's what you are!" Kurt snapped.

"You want your tail tied in a knot?" Pietro snapped.

"Bring it on!" Kurt made a fist.

"KNOCK IT OFF!" Todd hopped between them. "Look as much as I'd love to watch you two idiots go at it, we got bigger problems! We gotta stay on our toes!"

"For what?" Fred asked.

"The girls!" Todd snapped.

"Oh yeah I forgot about them," Fred sighed.

"You're right," Pietro said. "With Althea leading the pack there's no telling what's gonna happen."

"What's gonna happen is you Misfits are gonna cause more trouble for us like you jerks always do if we don't keep an eye on you!" Scott snapped.

"Did you guys ever stop to consider that you deserve it for the way you treat us?" Lance snapped. "If you didn't look down on us from your high horse all the time and act like you're better than us…"

"Newsflash!" Scott got in his face. "We are better than you!"

"Scott will you chill!" Kurt shouted. "As much as I hate to admit it, we're supposed to be working with them. The Professor would want us to at least try to get along with them."

"The Elf's right," Todd said. "Let's let bygones be bygones. Now we need to all stay together in one room…"

"I agree on that!" Scott snapped, glaring at Lance. "So we can keep an eye on them!"

"Maybe it's you we need to keep an eye on?" Fred growled.

"No it's the girls!" Todd groaned. "Don't you people ever listen to me?"

"Sorry Toad did you say something?" Pietro quipped.

"I am going to my room!" Lance snapped. "There is no way I am sleeping in the same space as you clowns!"

"But you can't!" Fred called out. "What if the girls get you?"

"I'll take my chances!" Lance stormed out.

"Look we all gotta stay together," Pietro told them. "Those girls are going to attack us and do something tonight. I don't know what though."

"Maybe Althea and your sister might," Scott said. "And definitely the Triplets, but we have our girls to keep them under control!"

"Yeah," Kurt said. "Jean and Kitty are definitely not like that and neither are Rogue and Amara!"

"Don't be so sure!" Todd told them. "Those girls are gonna do something evil! I know it!"

"The girls are not going to do anything!" Bobby snapped.

************************************************************************

"All right ladies…and Xi," Althea said. "It's time to put our plan into action! Let's go over the list! Whipped cream?"

"Check," Rogue held up a few cans.

"Water guns?"

"Check!" The Triplets cheered.

"Silly string?"

"Got it," Amara grinned.

"Those guys are not gonna know what hit them," Jean smirked.

"This is going to be fun," Xi said. "Attacking the males and making a mess."

"That's not her true plan," Wanda sighed.

"What is her true plan?" Jean asked.

"A boxer short raid!" Althea shouted.

"A what?" Rogue said.

"It's like a panty raid, only for girls," Wanda explained.

"I'm gonna get Todd's boxers right off him!" Althea laughed maniacally.

"You mean you're gonna strip him?" Kitty gasped.

"Yup!" Althea told her.

"You are a very sick deranged pervert," Jean told her.

"Thank you," Althea said. "Who's with me on the stripping?"

"Count me in!" Rogue said cheerfully. "There's a certain swamp rat that needs to be put in his place!"

"Well," Amara grinned. "I do want to get Bobby back for icing my underwear."

"When was this?" Althea asked.

"A while ago," Amara told her. "He tried a panty raid at the mansion. I think it's time he learned a lesson."

"Well I'm not really interested in stripping thank you," Wanda waved. "I'm not interested in any of those idiots. I just want to make a fool out of my brother."

"I think we all agree on that," Quinn said.

"YEAH!" Daria said.

"Oh no," Althea waved. "Only the real girlfriends are allowed to take their boyfriend's boxer shorts! That's the rule!"

"Oh man!" Quinn pouted.

"Yeah like we're going to listen to that rule," Daria muttered.

"I mean it!" Althea said. "Trust me on this! Don't disobey me!"

"Don't worry!" Wanda waved. "Xi and I will keep them in line!"

"This is wrong!" Kitty snapped. "Tell them Jean!"

"Well…" Jean said. "I mean if we're only allowed to do it to our boyfriends then technically…"

"What?" Kitty yelped. "You wouldn't like it if they did that to us!"

"They did try to do it to us, remember?" Rogue said.

"Yeah but they didn't try to take our underwear off us!" Kitty snapped. "And they failed miserably when they tried to steal our underwear!"

"What happened?" Wanda asked.

"I'll tell you later," Rogue said. "Well think of this as our revenge."

"Yeah don't you wanna show your boyfriend you care by ripping off his jockeys?" Althea asked.

"No I don't!" Kitty snapped.

"Since when are you the party pooper?" Wanda asked.

"Yeah that's Jean's job," Althea said.

"Hey!" Jean snapped.

"Aw lay off her," Amara said. "She and Peter are having kind of a rough patch."

"What happened?" Althea asked.

"I really don't wanna talk about it," Kitty sighed.

"Look all you have to do is phase us through the ceiling," Althea said. "Jean can levitate us up there. If you don't want to play Jockey Shorts Safari you can always just blast them with whipped cream!"

"I'll help you up but that's all!" Kitty snapped. "You're all just going to get caught anyway! The adults will catch you!"

************************************************************************

"What you mean they took off?" Xavier snapped.

"Just what it means," Low Light snapped. "Wolverine, Spirit and the Blind Master disappeared. Probably went out to the ninja dojo or one of their secret hangouts on the base to get plastered or something."

"Oh great," Roadblock sighed. "I gotta go find them before it's too late! Hold down the fort!" He took off.

"Where's Hank?" Cover Girl asked.

"With Shipwreck," Xavier sighed.

"Oh no…" Low Light said. "He didn't!"

"Take a look for yourself," Xavier wheeled into the kitchen. Cover Girl and Low Light went with him. They found the two of them at the table singing and drinking.

"How did this happen so quickly?" Xavier yelped.

"I dunno," Shipwreck hiccuped. "We thought it would be a good idea with so many kids in the house that we should put all the alcohol away where they couldn't get at it!"

"I think you've succeeded," Low Light looked at the empty bottles.

"Not yet!" Hank said cheerfully as he reached for another bottle.

"This cannot get any worse," Xavier moaned. At that very moment the two babies scampered in screaming wildly. They were dragging rolls of toilet paper behind them. Following them was Polly and Freedom.

"AWK! ONE ADAM TWELVE! ONE ADAM TWELVE! BABY ESCAPE ALERT! BABY ESCAPE ALERT!" Polly flew wildly around the room while Freedom followed the babies out the back door.

"You know you should really learn not to say things like that," Low Light grumbled as he and Cover Girl chased after the babies. "COME BACK HERE!"

"AWK! Polly wants a drink! Polly wants a drink!"

"NO!" Xavier snapped.

"Oh let him have a drink!" Shipwreck waved. "It's a party!"

"PARTY!" Hank, Polly and Shipwreck shouted.

"Isn't this great?" Shipwreck laughed. "Aren't we all buddy-wuddies here?"

"Buddy-wuddies?" Hank looked at him. "Shouldn't that be wuddy-buddies? Or Bubbly-wubblies? Charles what's the correct grammar for being sloshed?"

"Oh shut up and pass the drinks," Xavier moaned.

***********************************************************************

Meanwhile Lance was in his room trying desperately to ignore the sounds coming from outside. He lay there in his bed holding a pillow over his head. "This cannot get any weirder," He grumbled.

"I am so out of here!" Kitty snapped as she phased into the room. She blinked when she realized where she was. "Oh!"

"Kitty!" Lance sat up.

She looked at him, blushing as he sat there bare-chested wearing only a long pair of sweatpants. "Umm…Sorry," She turned to leave.

"Wait," Lance said. "Don't go…I…I wanted to say something to you. What are you doing up here anyway?"

"Oh," Kitty fidgeted. "All the girls are planning a raid on the boys. I helped them sneak up here but I'm really not in the mood right now."

"Yeah well," Lance waved. "I didn't really want to hang with those guys anyway."

"I've just been going through some stuff and I…I don't know," She sighed. "I've been really down."

"You did look a little depressed at dinner."

"You noticed?"

"Well yeah," Lance admitted. "I still care about you even if we aren't…"

He stopped. "Look," Lance sighed. "I know we didn't exactly end things on a good note. I'm sorry."

"Yeah I'm sorry too," Kitty sighed. "There's something different about you. You've changed somehow."

"That's putting it lightly," Lance sighed.

"No I mean it," Kitty sat down on the edge of the bed. "You look well…" She pointed.

"Well I have been training and stuff," Lance shrugged. He caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror. He then noticed that he did look more muscular, more toned and fit than he ever had before.

"Not just that," Kitty said. "The old Lance would have never apologized like you did. And I saw how you were playing with the babies during dinner."

"No big deal," Lance told her. "They're annoying but ya know. They're just little kids. Besides, they have it rough enough with their mutations. Especially Beak. Shipwreck found him in a bar. They were using him as some kind of entertainment," He clenched his fists. "It makes me sick just thinking about it."

"Yeah things aren't getting any easier in Bayville," Kitty sighed.

"I can imagine," Lance sighed. "Kitty I swear the whole thing with the school was an accident! My powers have been evolving lately. I couldn't control it."

"Yeah…I know now," Kitty said. "I overheard Roadblock saying something about Magneto drugging you. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have judged you so quickly."

"It's okay," Lance waved. "I guess I can understand why you'd feel that way. Let's face it, I don't exactly live up to the Boy Scout Code."

"Yeah but with the way things are going for mutants lately I'm not so sure you were totally wrong about mutants and humans living together," She sighed.

"I wasn't totally right either," Lance pointed out. "I'm just figuring out there's a whole lot of gray area in this. I'm happy with the Joes Kitty. They're really good to the guys and me. It's not that bad around here. Actually it's pretty interesting."

"I can imagine. You know I've forgotten how easy it was to talk to you," Kitty sighed.

"What about Peter?" Lance asked. "Can't you talk to him? I mean he is your boyfriend now."

"Well, we're not exactly …dating right now," Kitty pulled her knees to her chest.

"What?" Lance blinked.

"For the past month things haven't been that great," Kitty sighed. "I mean I like him but…something's happened."

"What?" Lance was starting to get very interested. "Come on you can tell me. What is it?"

"Tabitha."

"Say no more," Lance said. "Wait, you gotta say more! Peter and Tabitha?"

"Not exactly," She sighed. "Well maybe…I don't know!"

"Well what happened?" Lance asked. "You can tell me. I'll understand…"

************************************************************************

"I don't understand it!" Todd yelped. "You and Tabitha?" The remaining males were camped out in Todd and Xi's room because it was the largest.

"NO! NO!" Peter shouted. "It's all a big misunderstanding!"

"What happened?" Fred asked.

"It's complicated…" Peter groaned.

"I'll tell you what happened," Scott said. "You remember how Tabitha and Ray broke up? Well she blamed Kitty for it even though she was innocent. So naturally…"

"Naturally she decides to get even and flirt with Peter," Pietro groaned. "Yeah that sounds like something our Tabby would do."

"There's more," Ray groaned.

"More?" Pietro asked. "Do tell!"

"Well," Peter sighed. "I was in the pool taking a swim, minding my own business when all of the sudden Tabitha shows up. The next thing I know, she jumps in, takes her top off and attacks me."

"I think I get what's coming next," Todd groaned. "That's when Kitty walks in and sees the whole thing, am I right?"

"Bimbo," Peter groaned.

"The phrase is bingo," Bobby told him. "Bingo."

"Actually in this case Bimbo is more accurate," Remy sighed. "Not to mention the little incident in the Danger Room!"

"Tabitha was wearing a wig!" Peter protested. "It was dark! I thought it was Kitty! Besides nothing happened. Well nothing much…"

"Oh this is getting better," Todd snickered.

"Needless to say things are at an all time low," Peter sighed. "It cannot get any worse!"

That was when the door to the room banged open. The boys found themselves staring at a pack of very happy girls. "Hello boys!" Amara smiled. "Wanna play?"

"ATTACK!" Althea shouted as she shot the whipped cream at the boys.

Soon there was mindless screaming, shouting and chasing each other from one room into another. "Can't catch me!" Todd hopped around.

"Yes I can!" Althea shouted.

"Silly string attack!" Daria, Brittany, Xi and Wanda ganged up on Pietro, Fred and Ray.

"Run for your lives!" They screamed.

"JEAN!" Scott screamed from one of the rooms.

"HAHAHAHA!" Jean ran around in the hall waving a pair of boxer shorts wildly above her head. "They're mine! All mine!"

"Now Cher…" Remy was backing away slowly. "You don't want to do this!"

"Come to mama sweet cheeks," Rogue grinned.

"They're everywhere!" Bobby screamed.

"We gotta hide!" Peter screamed as he opened up a door.

And immediately saw Kitty in her pajamas hugging a shirtless Lance on his bed.

"WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE?" Peter shouted.

"Uh…" Lance blinked. "It's not what you think!"

"Oh yes it is!" Kitty snapped.

"It is?" Lance blinked. "It is!" He grinned. "Ha!" He stuck his tongue out at Peter and put his arm around Kitty.

"Why you lousy hood!" Peter rushed at Lance. Soon the two of them were fighting like mad.

"What's going on?" Scott (Who had found some sweatpants) and the others rushed in and saw the scene.

"Hey way to go Kitty!" Althea hooted.

Fred, Todd grabbed Lance and held him back as Rogue, Remy and Scott held on to Peter. "What happened?" Scott snapped.

"I think it's pretty obvious what happened," Daria snickered. "Kitty dumped Metal Muscles for the Rock Head!"

"I do not believe this!" Pietro groaned.

"Neither do I!" Peter snapped. "One misunderstanding and you go right back to this…this slime?"

"Watch it Tin Man!" Lance snarled.

"Who are you calling Tin Man you…" Immediately Peter started swearing in Russian.

"I may not speak Russkie but I know what that means!" Lance snarled as he tried to tackle Peter.

"KNOCK IT OFF!" Low Light shouted as he and Cover Girl stormed up the stairs. "What is going on here? Why are all of you upstairs? What's with all the silly string and whipped cream?"

The kids all started to talk at once. "One at a time!" Low Light shouted.

"We were just having a little fun," Amara said. "When Peter caught Lance and Kitty…Ummm."

"Doing the horizontal mambo," Althea said.

"WE WERE NOT!" Kitty snapped. "We were just talking!"

"Didn't look like talking to me," Jean said.

"Jean are those boxer shorts in your hand?" Cover Girl asked. Jean blushed and hid them.

"Wanda go see if any of the adults left downstairs are sober enough to help us handle this," Low Light ordered. "I can't believe all of you! In case you've forgotten we have a mission tomorrow morning! This is no time to be fooling around!"

"Oh yeah?" Quinn asked. "Then what were you and Cover Girl doing outside all this time?"

"What?" Althea asked.

"When you guys were planning the final stages of the raid I decided to do some reconnaissance," Quinn told them. "I have pictures!" She held up a digital camera.

"We were just talking!" Cover Girl said hotly.

"Yeah we were trying to get some peace and quiet away from you loons!" Low Light snapped.

"Yeah, right," Lance snickered.

"Nothing was going on I swear!" Cover Girl shouted.

"We've heard that before," Brittany laughed.

"They're all plastered in the kitchen," Wanda told them as she came back. "Xavier's doing wheelies. It's pretty funny."

"Oh I gotta get this on tape!" Pietro zoomed downstairs. Soon all the kids followed, several were still arguing.

"Lord help us all," Low Light groaned. "Tomorrow's mission is going to be a disaster. I know it."