Hi people! Just wanted to tell you all how much I appreciate your reviews. You are way too cool! Sorry about the delay... But I have an excuse! It is the holidays, and I was away. Just in response to some of the reviews- Taryn: yes, this is in response to the Snape Makeover challenge. I meant no harm, I give you credit for any of the plot that is specified by the rules, but all the decoration (i.e. Minerva in a thong) is mine. Aeiou- I mean no insult to Dame Maggie Smith; she is one of my favorite actresses. It's just that she doesn't have the looks or demeanor of a playboy model, and the thong thing is rather disturbing. Auror198- I hope that the remus/minerva romance was sufficient. You said whirlwind, and that was exactly what it was. Snakecharmer- I hope the chapters are long enough! By the way, I hate Ron too. Rupert Grint, especially with his real hair and clothes, is awesome. OK, OK, I'll get to the story now. Thanx all!
~Manisha~
The whole class, and even the Professor stared at Hermione in amazement. She turned a bright red, and tried to squeeze past the Potions Master, who was transfixed in shock, but she found her way blocked by his solid, muscular, leather-encased self. She looked down, waiting for the burst of angry words that would inevitably be followed by a string of detentions. But when he spoke, his voice was soft. "Thank you. And so are you. Now go to your seat, and get out your cauldron. We have some work to do." She looked up in astonishment at this new man who had been created out of leather, testosterone, and a nice soft teddy bear. The perfect combination in a man.
She blushed becomingly. "Thank you. Where do I sit? Next to Harry? But Pansy is sitting there."
"Oh yes. We got new seats, mixing the Slytherins and Gryffindors, encouraging calm between the houses. You'll be with Mr. Malfoy."
"Oh great," she muttered.
"What was that, Miss Granger?"
"Nothing, Professor." She sat down obediently beside Malfoy who was grinning evilly at her.
"Looking good, Granger."
"Oh, go to Hufflepuff, asshole. Just don't show me your ugly face again. Anyway, won't your mother be unhappy that you're coming on to a muggle-born mudblood? Oh, I forgot. I'm not."
"What?!?!?!?!?" Malfoy was VERY confused.
"Yeah. Turns out I had been adopted. My biological parents were both purebloods, but they weren't married, and the father were engaged to be married. They tried to hush up my birth by having my mother give birth in a muggle hospital, but she died. The father's name was written on my birth certificate."
"Is he alive?"
"As, a matter of fact, kind of. Probably not really. He's in Azkaban."
"Seriously? He was a Dark Wizard? Who was he?"
"Lucius Malfoy."
Malfoy gaped. "You're- But- you're my SISTER?"
"Yeah, Malfoy. Can't you hear what I'm saying?"
"You can't call me Malfoy anymore." He was smirking now, and had obviously gotten over the shock. "You are one too."
"Yeah, yeah. You're dad abandoned my mom, so I don't have to take his name. Unless you're saying that because you want me to marry you, but I seriously hope that's not what you're implying, because that would be REALLY wrong, on MANY levels."
"EWWWW! THAT"S GROSS!" Draco didn't realize that he had yelled this last phrase at the top of his lungs. As a shadow fell across his desk, he looked up to find Snape staring down at him.
"What's gross, Mr. Malfoy? Ms. Granger? I hope that she is not who you are talking about, because you are sadly mistaken. Ms. Granger is a beautiful and kind young woman, unlike you."
"Yeah, Malfoy," Harry whispered. "You are so unladylike."
"Shut up!" Draco was enraged.
"Did you just tell me to shut up, Mr. Malfoy?" Snape was almost spitting with rage. Hermione giggled. "And, what are you laughing at, Ms. Granger? I cannot stand your insolence, either of you. You have detention tonight, at eight. Be prompt. Class dismissed." Hermione went to his desk timidly as the rest of the class left.
"Professor?"
"Yes, Ms. Granger."
"About what just happened..."
"I know you don't deserve detention. I had to give you one, so the other teachers wouldn't think that I was playing favorites, and that my favorite would be you. I am supposed to have a favorite, but it is supposed to be Mr. Malfoy, not you. I am sorry. You need not serve it if you do not want to , although I have a rather interesting extra credit project you might want to consider doing for your seventh-year thesis. What about it?"
"Oh, I would love that!" At that moment, Harry called to her.
"Coming, Hermione?"
"Just a second, Harry. You go ahead. I don't have divination with you anyway."
"All right. If you're sure you can get to Arithmancy by yourself, that is."
"Of course I can, silly. Shoo." She turned to the Professor, who was staring at her, half amused, half angry. "What!!"
"He seems very protective of you."
"He is. One of these days, his protectiveness will choke me."
"Are you dating?" The question came out of no where.
"Huh?" It was not at all in character of Professor Snape to ask questions about a Gryffindor's personal life. But then again, everything about Snape was out of character these days. "I mean, no. No with a capital N. He's dating Ginny, and they already seem like they're married. Why do you ask?"
"Oh, just wondering. You seem tired. Why is it?"
"AAAAAH! Do I have circles under my eyes? I used concealer, but..."
"Don't worry, Ms. Granger. You look beautiful. I only said that because of the way you walked and talked, and your lack of enthusiasm."
"Oh. Well, if you must know, I was at a night club last night, because my brother and his fiancŽ took me. I met this man and I stayed out too late." The story seemed uncannily familiar to Severus.
"Really! I to was at a night club last night. I met a beautiful woman, and I was stayed out too late as well, but I remembered that I had classes, and left rather abruptly. I'm afraid the lady I was dancing with thought me quite rude." This seemed very similar to a story Hermione had heard elsewhere.
"Well... I just wanted to apologize for my earlier words. You must have thought me terribly impertinent."
"Not at all. Change takes everyone by surprise."
"May I ask you something rather personal, Professor?" Severus was apprehensive.
"I suppose so..."
"What was the name of the woman you met last night?"
"Hermia."
~Manisha~
The whole class, and even the Professor stared at Hermione in amazement. She turned a bright red, and tried to squeeze past the Potions Master, who was transfixed in shock, but she found her way blocked by his solid, muscular, leather-encased self. She looked down, waiting for the burst of angry words that would inevitably be followed by a string of detentions. But when he spoke, his voice was soft. "Thank you. And so are you. Now go to your seat, and get out your cauldron. We have some work to do." She looked up in astonishment at this new man who had been created out of leather, testosterone, and a nice soft teddy bear. The perfect combination in a man.
She blushed becomingly. "Thank you. Where do I sit? Next to Harry? But Pansy is sitting there."
"Oh yes. We got new seats, mixing the Slytherins and Gryffindors, encouraging calm between the houses. You'll be with Mr. Malfoy."
"Oh great," she muttered.
"What was that, Miss Granger?"
"Nothing, Professor." She sat down obediently beside Malfoy who was grinning evilly at her.
"Looking good, Granger."
"Oh, go to Hufflepuff, asshole. Just don't show me your ugly face again. Anyway, won't your mother be unhappy that you're coming on to a muggle-born mudblood? Oh, I forgot. I'm not."
"What?!?!?!?!?" Malfoy was VERY confused.
"Yeah. Turns out I had been adopted. My biological parents were both purebloods, but they weren't married, and the father were engaged to be married. They tried to hush up my birth by having my mother give birth in a muggle hospital, but she died. The father's name was written on my birth certificate."
"Is he alive?"
"As, a matter of fact, kind of. Probably not really. He's in Azkaban."
"Seriously? He was a Dark Wizard? Who was he?"
"Lucius Malfoy."
Malfoy gaped. "You're- But- you're my SISTER?"
"Yeah, Malfoy. Can't you hear what I'm saying?"
"You can't call me Malfoy anymore." He was smirking now, and had obviously gotten over the shock. "You are one too."
"Yeah, yeah. You're dad abandoned my mom, so I don't have to take his name. Unless you're saying that because you want me to marry you, but I seriously hope that's not what you're implying, because that would be REALLY wrong, on MANY levels."
"EWWWW! THAT"S GROSS!" Draco didn't realize that he had yelled this last phrase at the top of his lungs. As a shadow fell across his desk, he looked up to find Snape staring down at him.
"What's gross, Mr. Malfoy? Ms. Granger? I hope that she is not who you are talking about, because you are sadly mistaken. Ms. Granger is a beautiful and kind young woman, unlike you."
"Yeah, Malfoy," Harry whispered. "You are so unladylike."
"Shut up!" Draco was enraged.
"Did you just tell me to shut up, Mr. Malfoy?" Snape was almost spitting with rage. Hermione giggled. "And, what are you laughing at, Ms. Granger? I cannot stand your insolence, either of you. You have detention tonight, at eight. Be prompt. Class dismissed." Hermione went to his desk timidly as the rest of the class left.
"Professor?"
"Yes, Ms. Granger."
"About what just happened..."
"I know you don't deserve detention. I had to give you one, so the other teachers wouldn't think that I was playing favorites, and that my favorite would be you. I am supposed to have a favorite, but it is supposed to be Mr. Malfoy, not you. I am sorry. You need not serve it if you do not want to , although I have a rather interesting extra credit project you might want to consider doing for your seventh-year thesis. What about it?"
"Oh, I would love that!" At that moment, Harry called to her.
"Coming, Hermione?"
"Just a second, Harry. You go ahead. I don't have divination with you anyway."
"All right. If you're sure you can get to Arithmancy by yourself, that is."
"Of course I can, silly. Shoo." She turned to the Professor, who was staring at her, half amused, half angry. "What!!"
"He seems very protective of you."
"He is. One of these days, his protectiveness will choke me."
"Are you dating?" The question came out of no where.
"Huh?" It was not at all in character of Professor Snape to ask questions about a Gryffindor's personal life. But then again, everything about Snape was out of character these days. "I mean, no. No with a capital N. He's dating Ginny, and they already seem like they're married. Why do you ask?"
"Oh, just wondering. You seem tired. Why is it?"
"AAAAAH! Do I have circles under my eyes? I used concealer, but..."
"Don't worry, Ms. Granger. You look beautiful. I only said that because of the way you walked and talked, and your lack of enthusiasm."
"Oh. Well, if you must know, I was at a night club last night, because my brother and his fiancŽ took me. I met this man and I stayed out too late." The story seemed uncannily familiar to Severus.
"Really! I to was at a night club last night. I met a beautiful woman, and I was stayed out too late as well, but I remembered that I had classes, and left rather abruptly. I'm afraid the lady I was dancing with thought me quite rude." This seemed very similar to a story Hermione had heard elsewhere.
"Well... I just wanted to apologize for my earlier words. You must have thought me terribly impertinent."
"Not at all. Change takes everyone by surprise."
"May I ask you something rather personal, Professor?" Severus was apprehensive.
"I suppose so..."
"What was the name of the woman you met last night?"
"Hermia."