Hey everyone! Heh, I haven't been able to figure out how to work
italics... and having to go through and add //// slashes is really
annoying, so I hope you don't mind having to pick out thoughts or that the
idea of non stellar formating has deterred anyone from reading this fic.
It looks nice on word pad, but I just can't seem to get it to translate
onto fanfiction.net. If you know how to get italics to show TELL ME!! I
will worship you and your superior knowledge!
Disclaimer: I own nothing in the world of Harry Potter. I own the rights to nothing. Even the plot that I intend to force upon the characters of Harry Potter. Though, the plot is of my own creation; I just don't own it in any legally binding sense.
Thanks so much to girlofpoision for reviewing and previewing this chapter for me!!
Now onto the fic!
*******************************
I think it was second year when they found out. I have no idea how, bloody staff. They even wanted me to see a specialist. I made a fuss of course. I screamed at, cursed at, and maimed every thing in my sight. None of the paintings stayed on the wall for long, the canvas' torn from their wooden supports. Most of those at the end of the hall had the good sense to take leave of their frames. Vases shattered while candle wax played patterns against the gray stone wall. I vaguely recall my fist breaking off the granite nose of Jonet Spaldarg, one of the Aberdeen Witches, before a comfortable blackness consumed me.
I think Dumbledore told Filch that Peeves did it. I inflicted more damage in that one corridor than Peeves ever could of.
In the end, I gave in. They threatened to tell my parents. As long as Father and Mother were not told, I would comply. The aftermath of them knowing would of been dreadful. I think they expected me to be docile after that. That my mental status would make me more submissive to their demands. Of course I wasn't going to be willingly obedient, it's not in my nature.
I became more tumultuous, more of a bother to Potter and his gang of followers, and a terror to all first years. Damn Potter and his friends. They've always been an annoyance. It was a great grievance, to have had to deal with the unpleasantries of meeting them.
But still, it doesn't mean anything. Nothing means anything, and everything means nothing.
All the nuances of life are lacking importance. Life, itself, is pointless means of existence. What is it? Nothing more than a series of depressively dreary days, compiled into months, which form years that stretch on through eternity.
They said it would make me better. That it would cure the sickness growing in my mind. Their 'cure' only made it worse, accelerated its exponential growth. But I've found my own cure. Well, not really a cure, but a defense. It stops the darkness from overtaking my soul the way it has possessed my body and mind. It focuses reality, melts the numbness better than any medical potion of theirs has been able to. Lacking in words, the cure came to me. Unbidden. Apparently, the fates heard my muted pleas for salvation, and took pity on my blackened soul. Last summer was very nice.
*************************
For Draco Malfoy, summers at the manor were dull. By himself in a gargantuan mansion there was very little for him to entertain himself with. Between the summer of 6th and 7th year, Draco found himself, once again, alone in the manor library. His father had gone to Egypt on business for the Dark Lord. Lucious Malfoy was in charge of enlisting new Death Eaters. Were any spies found with in the party, the blame would fall solely on Mr. Malfoy.
His mother could be found having liaisons in a discreet part of the Malfoy homestead. The summer before, displaying little intelligence, she had forgotten to perform a protection charm prior to meeting her lover. Draco had assisted in the abortion spell. She had been so distraught over the thought of Lucious finding out. It hadn't been pretty. The fact that Draco's father never caught wind of the affairs was quite amazing.
Sitting in the Malfoy library Draco stared blankly at the book in front of him, idly flipping the pages. He shivered in the oppressive cold of the room and pulled his robes tighter to his body. He had been sitting there for several hours; lost in thought, completely unaware of the time.
Suddenly, he stood, glancing out the window at the night darkened sky. Turning from the window, he headed down to the elf quarters. Knocking on a door, half the size of a normal one, Draco sighed. He had to get out of the manor. Immediately, the door opened.
"Master Malfoy!" the house elf squeaked in surprise, "Can Millie help young sir?"
"I need muggle clothing. Get me some."
"What kind does--"
"It doesn't matter." Draco interrupted the nervously twitching house elf, "Something none conspicuous, anything. Just make it quick."
"Yes sir... M-Millie will get young m-master muggle c-clothes." The stuttering elf disappeared around a corner, and returned minutes later with a pile of black fabric. "It was all Millie could find.."
"Fine, give me the clothes." Grabbing the fabric Draco proceeded to undress in front of the house elf. Modesty was never one of his strong points. Without looking at the outfit he pulled the muggle clothing on, and instructed the elf to take his other clothes. Taking his wand from the discarded robes, he shoved the magical piece of wood into one of his new pockets.
"Always a good idea to be prepared." Muttering to himself Draco made his way to the grand entrance, or in his case exit. The foyer lighted by several floating candles had haunting shadows climbing the entrances walls. Standing at the door, no one tried to stop him, or ask where he was going and when he'd be back. No one cared when he left.
Outside Draco ran. He ran until his legs gave out and lungs were burning through his chest. Unable to go farther, he summoned The Knight Bus. With a deafening bang, the bus appeared.
"Welcome to the Knight Bus, emergency transport for the wizard and witch. My name is Stan Shunpike, and I will be your conductor this evening." A man who had small dents in his face, from years of bad acne, looked down at a heavily breathing Malfoy. "Where to?"
"I. want to. visit. muggle London." Draco forced out between several heavy breaths.
"Twelve sickles."
"Money? Oh, crap." Draco whispered to himself as he started to check his pockets, "I forgot about that." Reaching into the jacket pocket, he extracted a medium sized silken pouch, that conveniently was filled with many, many galleons and an equal amount of muggle money. Apparently, the house elves are not a stupid as I thought.
The stairs of the bus were steep to Draco's run-tired legs. As he got to the top, he handed the man a galleon and, without bothering to receive change, picked out his own bed. Thankful for the rest, he sat, pulled back the curtain beside his beside his bed, and stared at the quickly passing scenery.
*************************
Muggle London for Draco Malfoy was an experience. The particular street he was on was crowded with sparsely clad men and women waiting to get into clubs. Look at all the stupid muggles waiting to get into these places. What's the pull?
Confused as to why so many muggles wanted to get behind the doors of numerous buildings with flashy lights, Draco approached the door of one radiating the name San-J, which had a particularly long line.
"ye' can't g'in 'ere." A burly man, with a distinct Scottish accent stopped Draco at the door, and quickly checked him out at the same time.
He just looked me over. I could use this. "But I want to see what's inside." Coming up to the man, Draco placed a light hand on his shoulder and slowly rubbed up against his side. "Please." Pleading wasn't exactly his thing, but Draco was willing do anything to get his way.
"Dam', ye' ar' eh sexay lil' thin'." Groaning deeply, the man reluctantly opened the door for the blonde Slytherin.
"I knew you'd see my way." Walking in Draco failed to notice a sign that said: "San-J's the best gay club in London. Free Vodka when you participate in our extra activities." Inside the club was dark and the air held a unique musk scent. A dimly lit and narrow hallway led to an open door. The floor was filled with a mesh of moving bodies which Draco absently noticed were all men. Techno blared from the ceiling speakers and seemed to overpower the senses, and deep purple lights coloured the dance floor. A bar was to the right, and over in the left corner Draco spotted a muggle alone on a couch. Maybe he can enlighten me as to the nature of this place.
Sitting down on the couch next to the muggle Draco looked at him. The guy appeared no older than twenty. Hair dyed green hung over his eyes, and his outfit clung to the contours of his body. Lips painted black were accentuated by a small silver loop that pierced the lower lip. Leaning over Draco spoke into his ear.
"What is this place?"
Turning to face Draco the man studied him for a moment. Then stated, "It's a club." before looking back out at the chaotic dance floor.
Slightly miffed by the simple response Draco tried again. "I've realized that, but what is it's purpose?"
The man started to talk after giving Draco another long look. "Wait," the Slytherin interrupted "I can't hear you over this...music." Moving forward until their legs touched slightly Draco look at the other man expectantly.
"People come here to dance, have fun relax, to get pissed off their asses, and to find another guy to warm their bed for the night." Then he paused as if measuring the character of the smaller blonde. "But what really draws people here is upstairs. They find a kid that works here, and then they get shown the wonders that are upstairs, for a price of course."
"Oh." Draco thought for a second, "Do work hear?"
The green hair-ed man leaned over Draco, so their faces were mere inches apart. "Do you want me to show you upstairs?"
Startled Draco blurted, "I'm not gay." and then tried intently not to squirm under the intense stare of the other.
Then suddenly, after another measuring look, the club worker leaned down and closed the few inched between their lips. Instinctively, Draco's hands reached up to caress the smooth skin of the others cheek and to curl in the green hair of his neck. The man licked Draco's bottom lip, and Draco could do nothing but willing open his mouth at the others request. The lip ring, surprisingly, did not take away from the kiss, its metallic taste added to the pleasure.
Pulling back, the others mouth made its way to Draco's ear and asked, "Are you sure?"
Gasping Draco didn't know what to say. "I thought I wasn't," he whispered back. His body was tingling as energy ran through him. He felt alive.
"You sure you don't want me to show you up stairs?" He punctuated the question by rubbing Draco through his pants. "I'll even give you a discount, since I want you." He continued to rub the blonde.
"I've never..." Was all Draco could manage to say.
"Really?" Green Hair practically purred. "Well then, I can make you feel thing you've never felt before. I can make you feel higher than you've ever been before, and I can make you feel alive." By now the man was grinding his hips into Draco's.
He can make me feel alive? It was the only thing Draco was able to grasp. "What's... your name?" The man relentless.
"You can call me Zach." He spoke directly into the younger boys ear before kissing him again.
"Zach... sure... why not?" With that Zach immediately pulled Draco off the couch and rushed him up the side stairs. Reaching a plain door, with a simple silver 9 stuck to the center, Zach slammed the shorter Slytherin against it and ravished him a bit more. Pulling back for a second he pushed them through the door and slammed it behind them.
***************************
The experience was amazing, not to mention addictive. Vodka is also especially calming. I kept going back for more, and didn't visit home the rest of the summer. My parents didn't notice, I gained a new appreciation of house elves, learned drugs can add a special kind of kick to the whole experience, and are quite nice on their own. Drugs and sex are a powerful combination. They made me feel more whole then I had in years. It has become my 'cure'. My own secret combination defense against the darkness. One I made sure I'd be able to get once the summer was over. I compiled an ample store of mind altering chemicals before I returned to Hogwarts for the school year. It's keeping me sane. The sex was the harder part of the 'cure' to ensure, but it's surprising what some people will do in Hogsmeade for a bit of cash.
Disclaimer: I own nothing in the world of Harry Potter. I own the rights to nothing. Even the plot that I intend to force upon the characters of Harry Potter. Though, the plot is of my own creation; I just don't own it in any legally binding sense.
Thanks so much to girlofpoision for reviewing and previewing this chapter for me!!
Now onto the fic!
*******************************
I think it was second year when they found out. I have no idea how, bloody staff. They even wanted me to see a specialist. I made a fuss of course. I screamed at, cursed at, and maimed every thing in my sight. None of the paintings stayed on the wall for long, the canvas' torn from their wooden supports. Most of those at the end of the hall had the good sense to take leave of their frames. Vases shattered while candle wax played patterns against the gray stone wall. I vaguely recall my fist breaking off the granite nose of Jonet Spaldarg, one of the Aberdeen Witches, before a comfortable blackness consumed me.
I think Dumbledore told Filch that Peeves did it. I inflicted more damage in that one corridor than Peeves ever could of.
In the end, I gave in. They threatened to tell my parents. As long as Father and Mother were not told, I would comply. The aftermath of them knowing would of been dreadful. I think they expected me to be docile after that. That my mental status would make me more submissive to their demands. Of course I wasn't going to be willingly obedient, it's not in my nature.
I became more tumultuous, more of a bother to Potter and his gang of followers, and a terror to all first years. Damn Potter and his friends. They've always been an annoyance. It was a great grievance, to have had to deal with the unpleasantries of meeting them.
But still, it doesn't mean anything. Nothing means anything, and everything means nothing.
All the nuances of life are lacking importance. Life, itself, is pointless means of existence. What is it? Nothing more than a series of depressively dreary days, compiled into months, which form years that stretch on through eternity.
They said it would make me better. That it would cure the sickness growing in my mind. Their 'cure' only made it worse, accelerated its exponential growth. But I've found my own cure. Well, not really a cure, but a defense. It stops the darkness from overtaking my soul the way it has possessed my body and mind. It focuses reality, melts the numbness better than any medical potion of theirs has been able to. Lacking in words, the cure came to me. Unbidden. Apparently, the fates heard my muted pleas for salvation, and took pity on my blackened soul. Last summer was very nice.
*************************
For Draco Malfoy, summers at the manor were dull. By himself in a gargantuan mansion there was very little for him to entertain himself with. Between the summer of 6th and 7th year, Draco found himself, once again, alone in the manor library. His father had gone to Egypt on business for the Dark Lord. Lucious Malfoy was in charge of enlisting new Death Eaters. Were any spies found with in the party, the blame would fall solely on Mr. Malfoy.
His mother could be found having liaisons in a discreet part of the Malfoy homestead. The summer before, displaying little intelligence, she had forgotten to perform a protection charm prior to meeting her lover. Draco had assisted in the abortion spell. She had been so distraught over the thought of Lucious finding out. It hadn't been pretty. The fact that Draco's father never caught wind of the affairs was quite amazing.
Sitting in the Malfoy library Draco stared blankly at the book in front of him, idly flipping the pages. He shivered in the oppressive cold of the room and pulled his robes tighter to his body. He had been sitting there for several hours; lost in thought, completely unaware of the time.
Suddenly, he stood, glancing out the window at the night darkened sky. Turning from the window, he headed down to the elf quarters. Knocking on a door, half the size of a normal one, Draco sighed. He had to get out of the manor. Immediately, the door opened.
"Master Malfoy!" the house elf squeaked in surprise, "Can Millie help young sir?"
"I need muggle clothing. Get me some."
"What kind does--"
"It doesn't matter." Draco interrupted the nervously twitching house elf, "Something none conspicuous, anything. Just make it quick."
"Yes sir... M-Millie will get young m-master muggle c-clothes." The stuttering elf disappeared around a corner, and returned minutes later with a pile of black fabric. "It was all Millie could find.."
"Fine, give me the clothes." Grabbing the fabric Draco proceeded to undress in front of the house elf. Modesty was never one of his strong points. Without looking at the outfit he pulled the muggle clothing on, and instructed the elf to take his other clothes. Taking his wand from the discarded robes, he shoved the magical piece of wood into one of his new pockets.
"Always a good idea to be prepared." Muttering to himself Draco made his way to the grand entrance, or in his case exit. The foyer lighted by several floating candles had haunting shadows climbing the entrances walls. Standing at the door, no one tried to stop him, or ask where he was going and when he'd be back. No one cared when he left.
Outside Draco ran. He ran until his legs gave out and lungs were burning through his chest. Unable to go farther, he summoned The Knight Bus. With a deafening bang, the bus appeared.
"Welcome to the Knight Bus, emergency transport for the wizard and witch. My name is Stan Shunpike, and I will be your conductor this evening." A man who had small dents in his face, from years of bad acne, looked down at a heavily breathing Malfoy. "Where to?"
"I. want to. visit. muggle London." Draco forced out between several heavy breaths.
"Twelve sickles."
"Money? Oh, crap." Draco whispered to himself as he started to check his pockets, "I forgot about that." Reaching into the jacket pocket, he extracted a medium sized silken pouch, that conveniently was filled with many, many galleons and an equal amount of muggle money. Apparently, the house elves are not a stupid as I thought.
The stairs of the bus were steep to Draco's run-tired legs. As he got to the top, he handed the man a galleon and, without bothering to receive change, picked out his own bed. Thankful for the rest, he sat, pulled back the curtain beside his beside his bed, and stared at the quickly passing scenery.
*************************
Muggle London for Draco Malfoy was an experience. The particular street he was on was crowded with sparsely clad men and women waiting to get into clubs. Look at all the stupid muggles waiting to get into these places. What's the pull?
Confused as to why so many muggles wanted to get behind the doors of numerous buildings with flashy lights, Draco approached the door of one radiating the name San-J, which had a particularly long line.
"ye' can't g'in 'ere." A burly man, with a distinct Scottish accent stopped Draco at the door, and quickly checked him out at the same time.
He just looked me over. I could use this. "But I want to see what's inside." Coming up to the man, Draco placed a light hand on his shoulder and slowly rubbed up against his side. "Please." Pleading wasn't exactly his thing, but Draco was willing do anything to get his way.
"Dam', ye' ar' eh sexay lil' thin'." Groaning deeply, the man reluctantly opened the door for the blonde Slytherin.
"I knew you'd see my way." Walking in Draco failed to notice a sign that said: "San-J's the best gay club in London. Free Vodka when you participate in our extra activities." Inside the club was dark and the air held a unique musk scent. A dimly lit and narrow hallway led to an open door. The floor was filled with a mesh of moving bodies which Draco absently noticed were all men. Techno blared from the ceiling speakers and seemed to overpower the senses, and deep purple lights coloured the dance floor. A bar was to the right, and over in the left corner Draco spotted a muggle alone on a couch. Maybe he can enlighten me as to the nature of this place.
Sitting down on the couch next to the muggle Draco looked at him. The guy appeared no older than twenty. Hair dyed green hung over his eyes, and his outfit clung to the contours of his body. Lips painted black were accentuated by a small silver loop that pierced the lower lip. Leaning over Draco spoke into his ear.
"What is this place?"
Turning to face Draco the man studied him for a moment. Then stated, "It's a club." before looking back out at the chaotic dance floor.
Slightly miffed by the simple response Draco tried again. "I've realized that, but what is it's purpose?"
The man started to talk after giving Draco another long look. "Wait," the Slytherin interrupted "I can't hear you over this...music." Moving forward until their legs touched slightly Draco look at the other man expectantly.
"People come here to dance, have fun relax, to get pissed off their asses, and to find another guy to warm their bed for the night." Then he paused as if measuring the character of the smaller blonde. "But what really draws people here is upstairs. They find a kid that works here, and then they get shown the wonders that are upstairs, for a price of course."
"Oh." Draco thought for a second, "Do work hear?"
The green hair-ed man leaned over Draco, so their faces were mere inches apart. "Do you want me to show you upstairs?"
Startled Draco blurted, "I'm not gay." and then tried intently not to squirm under the intense stare of the other.
Then suddenly, after another measuring look, the club worker leaned down and closed the few inched between their lips. Instinctively, Draco's hands reached up to caress the smooth skin of the others cheek and to curl in the green hair of his neck. The man licked Draco's bottom lip, and Draco could do nothing but willing open his mouth at the others request. The lip ring, surprisingly, did not take away from the kiss, its metallic taste added to the pleasure.
Pulling back, the others mouth made its way to Draco's ear and asked, "Are you sure?"
Gasping Draco didn't know what to say. "I thought I wasn't," he whispered back. His body was tingling as energy ran through him. He felt alive.
"You sure you don't want me to show you up stairs?" He punctuated the question by rubbing Draco through his pants. "I'll even give you a discount, since I want you." He continued to rub the blonde.
"I've never..." Was all Draco could manage to say.
"Really?" Green Hair practically purred. "Well then, I can make you feel thing you've never felt before. I can make you feel higher than you've ever been before, and I can make you feel alive." By now the man was grinding his hips into Draco's.
He can make me feel alive? It was the only thing Draco was able to grasp. "What's... your name?" The man relentless.
"You can call me Zach." He spoke directly into the younger boys ear before kissing him again.
"Zach... sure... why not?" With that Zach immediately pulled Draco off the couch and rushed him up the side stairs. Reaching a plain door, with a simple silver 9 stuck to the center, Zach slammed the shorter Slytherin against it and ravished him a bit more. Pulling back for a second he pushed them through the door and slammed it behind them.
***************************
The experience was amazing, not to mention addictive. Vodka is also especially calming. I kept going back for more, and didn't visit home the rest of the summer. My parents didn't notice, I gained a new appreciation of house elves, learned drugs can add a special kind of kick to the whole experience, and are quite nice on their own. Drugs and sex are a powerful combination. They made me feel more whole then I had in years. It has become my 'cure'. My own secret combination defense against the darkness. One I made sure I'd be able to get once the summer was over. I compiled an ample store of mind altering chemicals before I returned to Hogwarts for the school year. It's keeping me sane. The sex was the harder part of the 'cure' to ensure, but it's surprising what some people will do in Hogsmeade for a bit of cash.