When the six boys and two girls, who somehow eluded fainting, so I put them
in anyway, (thanks for pointing that out, Slytherin Gal) regained
consciousness, they were in a very dark room.
"Ouchie." Said Lupin, having had a nasty blow on the head.
"MMmmMMMMmmmMM" a voice came out of the darkness. "Werewolf. The other other white meat."
Lily, Cas and Sev (who in my mental universe didn't already know about Remy's lyconthrapy) backed away from the boy nervously.
"I do not back away nervously." Sev told the author contemptuously. "I flat out run for my life."
"Do you like terrorising people?" Remus called to the person/thing terrorising him.
"It's a hobby." Said the voice. A person stepped out of the darkness and gave the group a swift, sad smile.
"Must apologise about Mr. Egomaniac's behaviour." The girl said. "He forgot to take his pills this morning."
An indignant answer pierced the air
"Excuse me!?! I forgot to take my pills? Lookie, little girly, and ya may recognise some of these people."
The girl looked closer and screamed when her eyes rested on Sev.
"Yeah. I know." Said Sirius. "The sight of his face is enough to make anyone scream." Sev smacked him. The girl smashed her head twice against the wall, then pinched herself and looked back at the group.
"Damn!" She snarled. " I'd hoped I was dreaming."
"So was I." Sirius said in a stage whisper that everyone could here. Sev smacked him again.
"Quit smacking me, arsewit!" Black growled.
"Quit deserving it then." Snape growled back.
The girl, who had not yet introduced herself, looked closely at Sev. Very closely.
"Don't go too close, girl. In the interests of personal hygiene, don't go too close!" James said mockingly. Sev frowned.
"Please tell these pricks to stop pissing me off." He told the ceiling. The girl looked at him.
"Does he always do that?" She asked.
"Yeah. Commenting to some unseen author person who lives in heaven." Remus told her.
(A/N .MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA I LIVE IN HELL AND WAS SENT BY THE ONE CALLED 'I AM.')
"I heard that." Sev muttered darkly.
(A/N MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA SATAN CHOSE ME AS HIS WIFE BECAUSE I WAS THE ONLY ONE STUPID ENOUGH TO APPLY TO LIVE IN HELL FOR ETERNITY!!!)
"Hear hear." Said Sev. The girl looked at him again, and silence ensued.
"P-professor. Professor Snape?" She asked fearfully.
In the instants that followed, three things happened: Sev fainted, Remus and Quirrell started giggling insanely and the rest just looked at the girl like she was nuts.
(A/N Ay)
"What?" She asked them. James groaned and smacked Remus and Quirrell, who were doubled up in fits of hysterical laughter.
"What's so funny?" He asked. Remus was too hysterical to answer, so Dan answered for him.
"We worked it out. Whatsername here is obviously from the future, so in the future Sev is a teacher at Hogwarts."
"God!" said Peter. "That doesn't bear thinking about"
"I'm guessing he teaches Potions and is Head of Slytherin, huh, Sirius?" chuckled Remus.
"Oh, Lord! Is this another one of those fics where I go back in time and end up falling in love with Remus or Sirius or Snape? Good grief!" The girl stormed.
(A/N You know it. Not that you can hear me, of course. Only Sev can hear me. Unfortunately as that may be)
"I'm Hermione Granger by the way." Said the girl, so now I can stop calling her 'the girl.'
"Hermeeoninny?" asked Peter stupidly. Hermione looked at him as though he were a lump of shit.
"Hermione."
"Oh." Said Peter, still not getting it.
(A/N Why am I getting déjà-vu here? Oh yes. Someone can't say Hermione. God's sake, it's not that hard.)
At that moment Sev woke up and glared at Hermione.
"Hello? Who is the person terrorising us who forgot to take his pills?" Remus asked.
The six boys and three girls looked expectantly into the dark, swirling mists of Wherever-They-Where. And, right on cue, out of the shadows stepped.....
"Dumbledore?"
(A/N I don't know where this story's going. I really don't. I'm not even typing it anymore, the Red Bull is. MmmMMmMMmM. Red Bull. the other white drink.)
"Ouchie." Said Lupin, having had a nasty blow on the head.
"MMmmMMMMmmmMM" a voice came out of the darkness. "Werewolf. The other other white meat."
Lily, Cas and Sev (who in my mental universe didn't already know about Remy's lyconthrapy) backed away from the boy nervously.
"I do not back away nervously." Sev told the author contemptuously. "I flat out run for my life."
"Do you like terrorising people?" Remus called to the person/thing terrorising him.
"It's a hobby." Said the voice. A person stepped out of the darkness and gave the group a swift, sad smile.
"Must apologise about Mr. Egomaniac's behaviour." The girl said. "He forgot to take his pills this morning."
An indignant answer pierced the air
"Excuse me!?! I forgot to take my pills? Lookie, little girly, and ya may recognise some of these people."
The girl looked closer and screamed when her eyes rested on Sev.
"Yeah. I know." Said Sirius. "The sight of his face is enough to make anyone scream." Sev smacked him. The girl smashed her head twice against the wall, then pinched herself and looked back at the group.
"Damn!" She snarled. " I'd hoped I was dreaming."
"So was I." Sirius said in a stage whisper that everyone could here. Sev smacked him again.
"Quit smacking me, arsewit!" Black growled.
"Quit deserving it then." Snape growled back.
The girl, who had not yet introduced herself, looked closely at Sev. Very closely.
"Don't go too close, girl. In the interests of personal hygiene, don't go too close!" James said mockingly. Sev frowned.
"Please tell these pricks to stop pissing me off." He told the ceiling. The girl looked at him.
"Does he always do that?" She asked.
"Yeah. Commenting to some unseen author person who lives in heaven." Remus told her.
(A/N .MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA I LIVE IN HELL AND WAS SENT BY THE ONE CALLED 'I AM.')
"I heard that." Sev muttered darkly.
(A/N MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA SATAN CHOSE ME AS HIS WIFE BECAUSE I WAS THE ONLY ONE STUPID ENOUGH TO APPLY TO LIVE IN HELL FOR ETERNITY!!!)
"Hear hear." Said Sev. The girl looked at him again, and silence ensued.
"P-professor. Professor Snape?" She asked fearfully.
In the instants that followed, three things happened: Sev fainted, Remus and Quirrell started giggling insanely and the rest just looked at the girl like she was nuts.
(A/N Ay)
"What?" She asked them. James groaned and smacked Remus and Quirrell, who were doubled up in fits of hysterical laughter.
"What's so funny?" He asked. Remus was too hysterical to answer, so Dan answered for him.
"We worked it out. Whatsername here is obviously from the future, so in the future Sev is a teacher at Hogwarts."
"God!" said Peter. "That doesn't bear thinking about"
"I'm guessing he teaches Potions and is Head of Slytherin, huh, Sirius?" chuckled Remus.
"Oh, Lord! Is this another one of those fics where I go back in time and end up falling in love with Remus or Sirius or Snape? Good grief!" The girl stormed.
(A/N You know it. Not that you can hear me, of course. Only Sev can hear me. Unfortunately as that may be)
"I'm Hermione Granger by the way." Said the girl, so now I can stop calling her 'the girl.'
"Hermeeoninny?" asked Peter stupidly. Hermione looked at him as though he were a lump of shit.
"Hermione."
"Oh." Said Peter, still not getting it.
(A/N Why am I getting déjà-vu here? Oh yes. Someone can't say Hermione. God's sake, it's not that hard.)
At that moment Sev woke up and glared at Hermione.
"Hello? Who is the person terrorising us who forgot to take his pills?" Remus asked.
The six boys and three girls looked expectantly into the dark, swirling mists of Wherever-They-Where. And, right on cue, out of the shadows stepped.....
"Dumbledore?"
(A/N I don't know where this story's going. I really don't. I'm not even typing it anymore, the Red Bull is. MmmMMmMMmM. Red Bull. the other white drink.)