Rating: R, as a precaution. Just some little references to Chapter Eight, which had the same rating.
For disclaimers, see earlier chapters.
A/N: Since the last chapter was getting closer to explicitness for those of you who appreciate such touches, this chapter will probably be better about avoiding that. Judge for yourself. And don't get on my case for the way I'm going to portray Sirius. It's just my view, after all, and if you disagree, say so politely. I ignore flames, except for using them to roast marshmallows. Anywho, on to the story!
~Chapter Nine: A Winning Battle~
Does Sirius mean it?
Remus turned ever so slightly, just enough to see what was happening. He heard every word that Sirius spoke to James, and heard small sniffs that signified Sirius was crying. Remus had never known Sirius to cry before. He felt a quick pang, before he remembered what Sirius had done to him – and what he had been trying to do. To feel sympathy for Sirius was betrayal to himself, since Remus knew that he had made himself clear. He would let Sirius know when he was ready. That should have been enough.
But clearly, it was not enough, and Sirius had tried to push things farther, much too quickly for Remus's taste. It would be a lie to say that he wouldn't have enjoyed it, at least initially, although Remus knew that it would also be a lie to say that he wasn't scared about letting Sirius have his way. He loved Sirius, despite his current fury, and he would like to remain together, but he would have some conditions: it would be on his terms.
"Does it hurt?" James asked, obviously referring to the bruised jaw and the tiny trail of blood that Sirius had not bothered to clean off.
"Yeah." Sirius grimaced. "He told me he punched you in the jaw, too."
"In defense of you," James replied solemnly. "You were wrong to force it on him, Sirius."
"I know," whispered Sirius. "You don't have to remind me. I lost him, okay? I don't need to think about it. I already have too much on my mind."
"He loved you," said James. "He probably still does, despite what happened."
Sirius wiped the tears away from his eyes, and attempted to clean off the blood that was still trickling over his chin. "I love him, too. The problem is that I want what I can't have, and he's keeping it from me on purpose. It would be heaven to sleep with him, I have to admit, but it would be better to know that we both care about each other. Nothing else matters." He sighed. "Of course, Remus isn't going to see it that way. I hurt him too badly."
You can be sure of that, Padfoot.
James nodded gravely. "He'll eventually forgive you. Don't stress over it too much."
"I can't help it," Sirius moaned. "Remus is like part of me. If he's gone…I don't know what I'll do."
James enfolded Sirius in a tight hug, and Sirius rested his head against the other boy's shoulder, the tears starting in his eyes again. At least there was no longer any blood flowing from his mouth, although Remus personally felt that Sirius deserved a bit of pain, to teach him that you didn't always get what you wanted. "I'm sorry it had to be this way, Sirius," said James.
"Not any more than I am. If only I hadn't done that. I asked him there with the intention of seducing him. I knew it was wrong, really, but I let lust take over me." Sirius sighed deeply, mournfully. "He has no idea what he does to me."
"I'm sure he felt something," said James, a hint of teasing in his voice.
"Stop reminding me. I shouldn't have pushed so hard. I probably bruised him. He was stuck between me and a stone wall, and I wasn't giving him any space." Sirius pulled out of the hug slowly, looking at James with sorrowful eyes. "I think it scares him when I push him to the wall like that, and when I make sure that he knows how turned on I am." Sirius shuddered. "He probably gets disgusted with it."
"Have you ever stopped to notice how he reacts?"
"Er – no," Sirius admitted. "I'm always too caught up in the moment."
"Well, did you notice anything while the two of you were in here, when he made the first move?" James was looking at Sirius pointedly.
"Of course not," said Sirius. "I told you, I never pay attention to anything but my hard on, except for how beautiful and perfect he is, and how good he tastes…" he trailed off with a longing sigh. "Remus is marvelous, isn't he?"
"Yes," James said warily. "He is quite important."
"I love him so much, Prongs – you would never even begin to imagine," Sirius flopped on his back. "And to think that I lost him…it's almost more than I can bear. He deserves better than me. I'm just trash, and he knew it. He kicked me down and threw it in my face that I wasn't worth his time or his love. He was right. You were right, Prongs. I hurt him. You knew it would happen, and look – it did."
James exhaled heavily. "I didn't want to believe it at first, Padfoot."
"It's true," Sirius said vehemently. "You know it is – stop being so nice about it and admit that I'm a prick. I should throw myself off the Astronomy tower, although that's too honorable a death for me. I'm low, James. I disregarded his wishes, even though I wanted nothing more than to make him happy. I wanted him to love me so much that I tried to rush things. I went about everything the wrong way. Remus needs stability, someone who can take better care of him than I can."
"Oh, stop degrading yourself," James said heavily. "He loves you. Remus is happy with just you – not your security, not your lustful attitude, although I'm certain that the latter is quite helpful in those…er, heated moments you have." He smiled, pleased that the mood had lightened a shade. "He just wants you and your love. Is there anything else to give?"
"Yes," said Sirius. "I owe him an apology. I should beg him to forgive me."
James grinned. "It's a rare occasion indeed when Sirius Black begs for forgiveness, or anything, for that matter. Are you sure that you're feeling all right?" He put his hand to Sirius's forehead. "You must care about him a lot, if you're willing to get down on bended knee and plead with him to forgive you."
"I would do anything for Remus," Sirius stated simply, but with power. He meant it.
"Let's hope so," James replied, "since he'd do the same for you."
Sirius nodded, looking out the window. The tears in his eyes were evident, despite the darkness. "I think I'd better go to bed," he murmured to James. "I need to get up early."
"Why?" James demanded. Sirius never wanted to wake up early. "Are you sure you're feeling all right?"
"I don't want to have to face him yet. I'll face him soon, but not now. I can't do it," Sirius explained, looking defeated. Remus was surprised; he had never seen Sirius look defeated. It was a revelation, to know that Sirius Black was not a god, even if some people worshipped him as one. Remus shook himself slightly as he remembered that he had once been among those people. Sirius had been the only one who moved him that way. But Sirius had been moving him the wrong way recently – he was always trying to move their relationship a step further, no matter how many times Remus told him to take it slow. He was jarred out of his thoughts when he heard Sirius say, "Goodnight, James."
James nodded and went back to bed, dropping off to sleep almost immediately. On the other hand, Sirius tossed and turned for hours before finally tiring. Remus allowed himself to settle down and rest as soon as he was sure that Sirius would finally fall asleep. He had to get up as early as possible, even if it meant confronting Sirius. He needed to think, and early morning was the best time for that.
When Remus next opened his eyes, the light outside was very faint, the sun's rays hardly penetrating the dark sky. He fumbled around inside his trunk and changed into clean robes, then slid off his bed. Just as he turned around to leave the dormitory, he found himself face to face with Sirius. "What are you doing up?" he demanded, raising a skeptical eyebrow at the other boy. He needed to make it convincing that he knew nothing about the conversation last night. Sirius would be furious if he knew that Remus had heard him pouring his heart out to James, since it made him vulnerable. It brought him down from his celestial perch, and that was something that he was not willing to forsake.
Sirius stared at him for a long, tense moment, his jaw slightly slack. There was a bruise there quite similar to James's, although this was – if possible – even more livid. Finally, getting a hold of himself, Sirius answered, "Thinking. Is that against the law?" He tried staring Remus down, and failed miserably.
"Well, think somewhere else. Most people don't like seeing filth the moment they wake up," Remus snapped. He pushed past Sirius, gathering no resistance from the other boy, which was surprising. Under normal circumstances, Sirius would protest and try to hold him back. But these were obviously not normal circumstances.
Remus left the common room and headed down the corridor, not sure where he was going until he was outside, standing in the dewy grass on the grounds. He began to walk, taking a leisurely pace so that he could concentrate on other things. Such as Sirius, and what would happen now. He still loved Sirius, no matter what had happened between them, but the problem was that to forgive the other boy, even now, would be pointless. Sirius had to know that he had done something wrong. He already repented, but that was because he couldn't have what he wanted. Remus remembered what he had heard the night before. He knew that Sirius was used to getting what he wanted, and he knew that Sirius wanted nothing more than to have him back. Hand Sirius what he wanted, and Sirius was the winner.
I'm going to win this one, and I'm going to do it on my own terms.
Remus went to breakfast feeling empowered, although his resolve began to crumble the instant he saw Sirius, and the misery on his face. He was speaking quietly to James, who seemed sympathetic. Gathering his wits, Remus sat down beside James. The only acknowledgement of his presence was James's brief nod. Sirius flicked his eyes over Remus, despondency pouring from him with every breath he took. It was clear to anyone that Sirius was suffering, but why he was suffering was known only to three people. Remus personally wanted to keep it that way.
They ate in silence; Sirius refused to continue his conversation with James when Remus was present, and Remus hadn't the heart to attempt talking to anyone, not even James. Peter was sitting down the table, sensing that the other three needed their space and wanted their silence. James got up first, and moved down to discuss something with Lily in urgent, hushed voices. She nodded solemnly and they were silent, but neither moved from their spot.
Sirius and Remus were left alone, but where James and Lily's silence was understanding, theirs was tense. The situation was a ticking bomb – if either of them did anything to set it off, everything would worsen. Remus, tiring of the oppressive silence and the cloud of sadness that hung around Sirius, dampening the spirits of everyone around him, got up and went to Transfiguration. He didn't bother talking to James. No one was going to understand, anyway – no one but himself, and he wasn't even sure that he understood.
He heard James and Lily enter, saw them sit down, but he did not utter a word in greeting, nor did he wave or show that he noticed them. Remus was too lost in thought, busy pondering what to do about Sirius, to care when everyone else came in. He had inked his quill and had it poised on the paper, ready to take notes, but when he looked down he noticed that he had ruined the parchment: a large blot had formed, coating an entire corner of the sheet. Cursing silently, Remus threw it away and got out a new sheet. This time he did not poise his quill. Rather, he sat staring out the window until he heard the classroom door open again.
At first he thought it was Sirius, but when he turned to look, Professor McGonagall was striding into the classroom, her mouth pulled tighter than usual. As she began to talk, Remus started to absently take notes, glancing towards the door constantly. Throughout the lecture, he was too busy looking for Sirius to hear what Professor McGonagall was saying. He almost didn't care, come to think of it. Although technically, he reminded himself, he shouldn't have been waiting for Sirius. It wasn't his problem if Sirius skived off and got into trouble later. He wasn't supposed to care what Sirius did anymore.
The problem was that he did, and it was unavoidable. Sirius was a fixture in his life. Remus had come to depend on Sirius. The thought scared him, though in a way it was relieving to admit the truth, even if he was only telling himself. At least he accepted it. At least he knew that he hadn't been dreaming the whole time they were together. Right now, though, it seemed as though the fantasy had come to a sudden halt. Remus was awake again. This was real life, and he was no longer playing Sirius's game.
Throughout the entire day, Sirius showed up at only one lesson. Ten minutes into Herbology, he came banging into the greenhouse. If it was possible, he seemed more pained than before. He sat down with James and Lily, starting a conversation. Somehow, Remus got the feeling that Lily knew what had been happening. He wasn't sure yet if he appreciated it or not, but at least they could trust Lily. She was one who could understand. She already knew that he and Sirius had been together; what harm could more knowledge of their currently shattered relationship do?
Remus immediately knew the answer to the puzzle. He would talk to Lily and James, the only ones who knew about it who were neutral. Tonight he would tell them his side, the whole story, and ask their advice. They were in a relationship, and they knew all about Sirius. They knew about what had happened between Remus and Sirius. If anyone would understand, if anyone could help, it was them. The mere thought of going to someone like Peter and confessing his innermost feelings was absurd. Remus almost laughed.
But he had the key now, and it fit the lock perfectly.
He went through Herbology attempting not to look at Sirius, but he caught himself staring several times. What was wrong with him? He wanted nothing more than to push Sirius out of his mind for a moment, and here he was, right there, but so unreachable. Remus knitted his eyebrows together and forced himself to concentrate on Professor Sprout's instructions. This was no time to give in, especially after last night. He couldn't forgive Sirius for that. Remus wouldn't give him the satisfaction of knowing that he had won.
Remus waited until the common room was nearly empty before he caught Lily and James. They were about to go out the portrait hole when he stopped them. "I need to talk to you," he said, trying not to sound desperate. He wasn't begging for help or throwing himself at their mercy. He wasn't that type of person. Usually he relied on himself to deal with things. If Sirius were still with him, then he would have been the one to help.
He isn't your boyfriend anymore, you twit, Remus told himself fiercely. Get over him.
"What is it?" asked James.
"It's about Sirius," Remus said.
James exchanged a concerned look with Lily. "All right," he said. They moved back to one of the couches and sat down. When the last stragglers had gone, he added, "What is it about Sirius?"
Remus sighed. He was going to do it, and he wasn't going to cry – he was going to be strong. He would prove that he didn't need Sirius. They probably already assumed that, but he needed to prove it to himself. "I know that Sirius has overstepped his boundaries," he began, drawing a shaky breath. Anxiety was beginning to settle in. "I know that he was wrong, and I hated him for what he did. The problem is that I still care for him."
"That's not so much of a surprise," James said.
"No, it's not really, but I was starting to depend on him too much. I can easily live without him," he added, seeing the look on James's face. "I just don't know what I'm supposed to do. Obviously I want to fix things, but Sirius is probably pissed at me for hitting him and making a fool of him. Even more important, to go to him and forgive him is to let him win. I don't want him to think he can get away with trying to push himself on me. I explicitly told him to let me take it at my own speed."
"Remus, if you aren't ready to do anything with Sirius – platonic or not – then don't do it," said Lily reasonably. "If it makes you feel that bad, it isn't worth concentrating on."
"She's right," James agreed. "Put Sirius out of your mind. Since he disregarded your feelings and your wishes to take it slower, he disregarded you as a person. He doesn't need to be forgiven yet. And you're right, too – he would be winning if you handed him the one thing he wants the most."
Remus thought about their words for a minute. He wasn't sure whether to agree with them, or tell them that Sirius was too important to push away. The thought of losing Sirius was excruciating. He had already distanced himself, punishing Sirius in his own way for what had happened, but he didn't want to sever their ties completely. He still loved Sirius, and he knew, from what he had heard Sirius telling James, that Sirius felt the same way. Perhaps they had a chance. Or perhaps not; Sirius was too quick to anger, and too hard to forgive. Remus shook his head, trying to clear it, but all that did was make his headache worse. "I can't just stop thinking about him," he said aloud. "I've been thinking about him since second year. I just can't let his stupid mistakes govern my life. I want to believe that what he did, he did out of passion. But that's just wishful thinking, isn't it? He did push himself on me, and he does seem to want me to have sex with him quite a lot, more than anything else."
"You can refuse him," Lily pointed out. "If he tries to do anything then, like he did last night, you have grounds to lose him. He doesn't deserve you if he can't respect your wishes."
"That's why I'm so confused," said Remus. "I don't want to lose him, but I can't forgive him. I'm going to win this round."
James seemed to be fighting a battle with himself, although Remus didn't know which side won until he said, "Last night, when Sirius came back from trying to seduce you, he told me a couple things. I know that I'm betraying his trust by telling you, but you have a right to know, since they involved you." He glanced around, as though expecting Sirius to come charging in and attack him, but they were alone in the room. "He said that he asked you to meet him with the intention of seducing you, but he also said that he did it because he let his lust get to him. Then he said that he loved you. He said the thought of losing you was more than he could bear. He brought himself down. He said he didn't deserve you. Just the way he was saying it – he felt his words. He meant it. Sirius is guilty for what he did, and he's paying the price. Did you see how miserable he was today?"
Remus nodded. "I noticed," he said. "But Sirius can't have meant all that, could he?"
"I guess you would have to ask him," James said. "I don't care if he comes after me for telling you what he said. You had a right to know anyways."
"He won't come after you, because I'll tell him the truth," Remus said. "I should have told you sooner, James, but I didn't want you to be angry. Last night, when you were talking with Sirius, I was awake. I heard everything. And that's why I feel so low for trying to get over him. We should be able to talk over things, shouldn't we? Ignoring each other and pretending to hate each other doesn't solve the problems."
"Then go tell him that," Lily prompted. "Sirius needs to hear it from you."
"If you heard what we said last night, you know he still loves you, no matter what he did," said James. He did not seem angry that Remus had overheard. If he cared at all, he wasn't showing it, or did not feel badly about it.
"I'll do it tomorrow, then. I'll have to catch him alone, but that won't be difficult, considering the way he mopes around by himself." He felt a pang of guilt as he remembered that Sirius was so miserable because he thought that his remaining love was no longer returned.
Lily and James nodded as one unit, and Remus stood up. He vowed to be true to his word. He owed it to himself, and – much as he might regret it later, or perhaps reap a benefit from it – he owed it to Sirius. Sirius had to know the truth. He might not think that he deserved Remus, but he deserved that much. Hell, he deserved the world. Remus smiled to himself. Right now, he didn't even mind if Sirius came in. He would tell him the truth. He glanced back at the other two. Well, maybe not right now. They were still in the room, and that would just be embarrassing for both Remus and Sirius. But another time. Any time they were alone. Remus felt his resolve strengthen and his mood lighten. He could do this. He was fighting a winning battle.
As usual, Remus was up with the sun. He was practically before it today, for he still had a strange happiness and determination left from last night. Somehow, confessing his thoughts aloud made them even truer than they had ever been. All it took now was Sirius to wake up, or to provide the opportunity for them to be alone. Remus's smile faltered a bit when he remembered what had happened the last time they were alone, but that was past. Sirius felt badly about it – he certainly regretted it – and it had only happened because Sirius let passion and lust get the better of him. He had learned his lesson. Remus was willing to give second chances.
He got dressed and was about to go down to the common room to think over exactly how to tell Sirius, but a small noise stopped him. He turned around and Peter was climbing out of bed, looking tired, but with a strange expression of epiphany on his face. Remus only stared at him, but Peter seemed not to care. He met Remus's gaze eye for eye, until he spoke, his voice shaking slightly, as though he were nervous. "Remus," he said, "I heard the strangest conversation last night. You, and Lily, and James…you were all in the common room, talking about something that Sirius did to you." He paused and tried to stop his hands from quivering, but he was unsuccessful. Giving up, he added, "It isn't true, is it? You and Sirius can't be together." He fixed an unwavering gaze on Remus, which was a rare and spectacular feat, since Peter never looked anyone in the eye, not even his own best friends.
"If it would make you feel better, I would tell you that it's not true," Remus replied. "But I can't tell you that, because I don't want to lie, even if it would help you. Sirius and I are boyfriends, or rather, we were. But I don't feel like discussing what he did. It's over, and I want to forget it and forgive him."
Peter took a small step back. "So it wasn't a joke," he murmured. "You and Sirius – I had a feeling, but I never knew that it was based on reality… I can't believe that Sirius is gay."
"He is, Peter," sighed Remus. "Sirius only slept with girls for the image. It's over now."
"He sleeps with you now, I suppose," Peter said, looking almost sullen.
"No," Remus said, taken aback. Peter never spoke out like that, and he never showed displeasure with his friends. He always went along with them, no matter how dangerous or how foolhardy their actions might seem. It hit Remus that a lot was changing about Peter this year, although he wasn't sure if he liked it. Fear oozed from Peter's every pore, cowardice floated from the air with each shaky breath. But that wasn't what made Remus wonder. No, it was the way Peter seemed sulkier this year, so much…angrier. He had an aura of hatred and negativity that was hard not to sense, even without enhanced senses. With a deep breath to calm his mind, Remus added, "We've never slept together, Peter. I don't think I'm quite ready for that yet."
Peter nodded. "I don't really mind," he said, looking down and folding his fingers together to stop his hands twitching. "Just – don't do anything in front of me, please. I don't like the thought of seeing two men…snogging." He shuddered, as if the very words were unholy.
"You have nothing to worry about," Remus assured him. "Privacy is important to us, at least to me. Most people aren't very – er – tolerant."
"Yes," Peter said. "They aren't." He was nodding to himself.
Remus thought it was probably wise to go on down to the common room, while it was still empty. He needed a little time to work things out with himself before he went and admitted everything to Sirius. He wasn't even sure how his words would be received. After all, he and Sirius had gone a day without talking – longer than they had ever done in their years as best friends. Remus was determined to make up for it – and make up for it he would.
Sirius got up too early for his taste. He was still feeling like jumping off the Astronomy tower, and being forced to wake up was not helping. Sliding out of bed, he glanced over to Remus's bed. It was empty, the curtains open and the sheets rumpled. It had been made in great haste, as though Remus had been eager to leave. Probably to avoid me. I don't blame him. Sirius dragged himself to his trunk and pulled out some clean robes. He got dressed and made himself look decently human, then slinked down the stairs to get some time alone before the common room filled up with chattering people.
He plopped down on one of the couches and was staring into the fire when he noticed that he was not alone. In one of the chairs across the room, Remus was sitting, his hair falling across his face as he propped his chin on his knee with one hand. Sirius caught his breath. He didn't want to disturb Remus and ruin the moment; it was simply too peaceful, too good an opportunity to pass up. Yesterday morning, Remus had been very cold to him – with good reason, he knew – and if he spoke now, he had no doubt that Remus would act similarly.
Remus was the first to look up. "Sirius," he breathed, jumping to his feet. His face turned a very faint, almost unnoticeable, shade of pink. Sirius was sure that he was about to leave, but instead, Remus came over and slowly seated himself beside Sirius on the couch. He was almost close enough for their hips to be touching. Sirius breathed in the pleasant smell that was so uniquely Remus, the smell he had been missing ever since he made the worst mistake of his life. "Sirius, I have to tell you…"
"Remus, I'm so sorry," Sirius said, sliding off the couch and to his knees. He knelt in front of Remus, looking pleading and submissive. "I let passion and lust take over me. I violated you, Remmie, and I should have never even asked you to meet me…" Sirius reached for his hands, grasping them in his own. "I want you to forgive me. Even if you don't, though, I want you to know that I will always love you."
"Sirius – that was what I meant to tell you," Remus said, feeling tears starting in his eyes. "I want to forgive you. I'm going to forgive you." He smiled just as the tears began rolling down his cheeks. He would have wiped them away, but he didn't want to take his hands out of Sirius's grip. "I love you, Siri. I always have – I always will."
Sirius slowly moved his hands and placed them gently on either side of Remus's face, brushing the tears away with his thumbs. "Please don't cry, Remmie…you know I can't stand it when you cry."
"I'm not crying because I'm sad," Remus said with a teary smile. "I'm just glad that you care this much…I thought I'd lost you, after what I did to you."
"No," Sirius said, taking Remus's hand in his own again and kissing it softly. "I was the one who was wrong. I asked you there just to seduce you, and I pushed myself on you. I knew that I was disrespecting your wishes. For some stupid reason I thought you would just give up and let me win. I didn't deserve to win, Remmie, and I know it. You should win. You're too good for me, love. You always will be."
"That's not true, Sirius," Remus protested. "I don't deserve you. I'm a monster and you're…perfect."
"You're not a monster. You're my Remus, and I love you no matter what you do or what you are." Sirius kissed his hand again, but Remus only shook his head and leaned down to kiss him on the lips. He slid off the couch slowly and into Sirius's arms. "I'm sorry, love. I'm sorry for making things so hard for you," murmured Sirius between kisses.
"Don't be. It's over. All that matters is now."
They pulled apart, and Sirius brushed away the tears that were threatening to fall from his eyes. "So you are willing to forgive me after all I've put you through?" he asked. He looked hopeful, but still had a trace of pleading in his eyes.
Remus smiled. "Of course I'm willing to forgive you," he said. "It's in the past, I told you."
Sirius was about to kiss Remus again when he heard people coming down the stairs. He smiled apologetically and pulled back. They both stood up and nonchalantly moved to two of the chairs in a secluded corner and sat, watching, as several younger girls came down their staircase. James was next to come down, looking tired and rather cranky. It seemed that something had woken him before he wanted to be, because he was continually taking off his glasses to rub his eyes. Peter followed, murmuring apologies to James for waking him. James was too busy watching Sirius and Remus to do much else but nod. He smiled when he noticed that they were actually sitting together, and that when they looked toward one another, it was a look filled with love, not hostility. He nodded to himself and sat down across the room. Peter had already rushed out of the portrait hole, though no one knew where he was going. Sirius and Remus really didn't care. They were far more focused on one another.
Finally, after Lily came down and met James, they followed the other couple down to breakfast. As usual, they were ignoring what James was telling Lily until Sirius heard his name. He stepped up next to them. "What are you talking about?" he asked. Remus hurried up next to him, puzzled. He had assumed it was obvious the other two were talking about them.
"You and Remus, of course," James replied nonchalantly. "I was just telling Lily that you two got back together. It is true, isn't it? Or were my eyes deceiving me back in the common room?" Both he and Lily were watching them with raised eyebrows.
"It's true," Remus replied, before Sirius could open his mouth and protest.
"Oh," James said, "While I'm thinking about it, Peter woke me up this morning and said he had something to tell me. I was so cranky that I didn't bother to let him say it, but do you know what it was?"
Remus turned pink. Even Sirius was staring at him with interest now. "Last night, he overheard our conversation about Sirius and I," he said. "He wanted to know if what he had heard was true. He didn't know about us yet, and I think it scared him. You know Peter; he doesn't understand it if it's out of the ordinary."
"You guys talked about me last night?" Sirius asked, looking confused.
"Yes," James said. "You should feel honored that Remus wanted to talk about you when you two were broken up."
"Oh." Sirius looked pleased with himself.
Remus nudged him. "James, you shouldn't have said that. You just doubled his ego."
"My ego is fine, thanks," Sirius protested, but he was still smiling.
"Sure," James said.
They reached the Great Hall, and Lily and James split off to go to a different end of the table. Remus and Sirius sat down where they always did, saving a spot for Peter, but he never showed up. They didn't mind, not technically; it gave them time to talk between themselves about current events that Sirius had missed, and vice-versa. Mostly it was talk about how miserable Sirius had been, and how guilty and torn Remus had felt. But soon the conversation ended, so that they could go on to Herbology.
Finally, everything was right. And right was where Remus wanted it to stay.
A/N: Nice bit of fluff in there for those who like Sirius to be romantic. For the rest of you, though, don't kill me. I just like a bit of romance myself – is that too much to ask? Well, this is done sooner than I thought, which is a rare event for me. *Knocks on wood* Reviews are welcome, but no flames. I laugh at their stupidity and weakness. :D I'll write more and update later, hopefully soon. For now, this is it.