Jess's POV
This takes place after Rory has left for D.C, after the season 2 finale,
leaving Jess alone
I can't stand her. I can't stand the way she makes me feel. She's a suffocating cloud that surrounds me, controlling my actions, thoughts and feelings. Sometimes I think that she controls my breathing. But somehow, how much it can be distracting, it still feels sort of uplifting, intoxicating and plain addictive. Almost as good as love.almost.
The problem is I don't know how she feels. Sure, she kissed me. One hell of a kiss. A kiss that felt like it was releasing all the tension that had built up between us. But those beautiful, big, blue eyes hide what she is really thinking, inside.
But I'm not patient. Anyone will tell you that. I'm not going to sit around and wait until she figures out what she feels. As much as, oh god, I can't believe I'm saying this. want her.I'm not like Dean. I can't believe that me, James Jesse Marino, can't get a girl. It's never happened beofre. My friends back in New York would never believe it. No way. I guess that's one way Rory makes me a better person. She makes me realise that you just can't charm everyone. Hell! She's even making me admit all this crap. I don't feel anything. Well, I haven't until now. I guess I have felt emotions before, but never as strong as this. I'm noticing things I've never noticed before.I'm experiencing the world in a whole new light. I have something to look forward to. All just because of her.
Every night, I close my eyes and I see her. I daydream about just her saying my name, just saying hi to me. Often, when I can't sleep, I turn on my music, sit by the window and look out on the starry sky, thinking about her. Think about her smile, think about her perfect glossed lips, think about her voice, think about her.
But as always, anything good happening to me always has a side effect. I miss her. I hate the fact that she's left me dangling here on a string. I hate the fact that she has such an effect on me, makes me so vunerable. But, I can't hate her.
I can't take this lonliness much longer. She has left a huge hole inside me. I need someone. Anyone. Just someone that will distract me. From her. Take way this suffoctaing cloud that's surrounding me. Hey! It might even teach her a lesson, see how she likes it. Wait, teach her a lesson? Hurt someone I love? I love her? Oh god, thanks a lot heart; letting me fall for her, letting me love her.
I can't stand her. I can't stand the way she makes me feel. She's a suffocating cloud that surrounds me, controlling my actions, thoughts and feelings. Sometimes I think that she controls my breathing. But somehow, how much it can be distracting, it still feels sort of uplifting, intoxicating and plain addictive. Almost as good as love.almost.
The problem is I don't know how she feels. Sure, she kissed me. One hell of a kiss. A kiss that felt like it was releasing all the tension that had built up between us. But those beautiful, big, blue eyes hide what she is really thinking, inside.
But I'm not patient. Anyone will tell you that. I'm not going to sit around and wait until she figures out what she feels. As much as, oh god, I can't believe I'm saying this. want her.I'm not like Dean. I can't believe that me, James Jesse Marino, can't get a girl. It's never happened beofre. My friends back in New York would never believe it. No way. I guess that's one way Rory makes me a better person. She makes me realise that you just can't charm everyone. Hell! She's even making me admit all this crap. I don't feel anything. Well, I haven't until now. I guess I have felt emotions before, but never as strong as this. I'm noticing things I've never noticed before.I'm experiencing the world in a whole new light. I have something to look forward to. All just because of her.
Every night, I close my eyes and I see her. I daydream about just her saying my name, just saying hi to me. Often, when I can't sleep, I turn on my music, sit by the window and look out on the starry sky, thinking about her. Think about her smile, think about her perfect glossed lips, think about her voice, think about her.
But as always, anything good happening to me always has a side effect. I miss her. I hate the fact that she's left me dangling here on a string. I hate the fact that she has such an effect on me, makes me so vunerable. But, I can't hate her.
I can't take this lonliness much longer. She has left a huge hole inside me. I need someone. Anyone. Just someone that will distract me. From her. Take way this suffoctaing cloud that's surrounding me. Hey! It might even teach her a lesson, see how she likes it. Wait, teach her a lesson? Hurt someone I love? I love her? Oh god, thanks a lot heart; letting me fall for her, letting me love her.