Four

October 30, 2023

With a plea deal finally reached in his latest case, the court is recessed. Carisi started to pack up his briefcase.

"So, I understand this is the last we're gonna see of the beard, Counselor?" Judge McNamara asked him, as he descended from the bench. The bailiffs snicker.

Carisi ran his hand down the full beard and chuckled. Word had gotten out and pretty much every judge and defense attorney he'd met with over the past few weeks knew that he was growing a beard for a Halloween costume. If he'd known doing something like this would ingratiate him to all the judges, Carisi would've grown a beard years ago. They'd all get this little twinkle in their eyes before teasing him about it. He smirked and looked back at the Judge.

"Actually, Judge McNamara, tomorrow the beard goes, but the mustache is stayin' around till Saturday."

The judge raised his eyebrows. "A mustache huh...you dressing up as Magnum PI, Counselor?"

Carisi picked up the briefcase and walked over to the much older man chuckling. A reference to a show from the 80's.

"No, my daughter...she uh…wanted us to dress up as the Addams Family...so Gomez Addams, at your service." Carisi took a small bow.

"She knows the Addams Family? Well, I think you're gonna need to bring photos back on Monday. That's all Nancy and the other bailiffs have talked about since you started growing that beard." He motioned to the long-time bailiff who's been in charge of his courtroom for years. Carisi had seen her even back when he was a detective. McNamara must request her, and he carried a lot of clout in the courthouse.

When Carisi looked her way, she quickly blushed and busily started checking doors to make sure they were locked. He wondered if Barba had grown a beard when he was still an ADA, would they have reacted this way with him. Probably. He checked his watch and said his farewells so he could get back to his office to meet Sienna. He'd promised Amanda he'd take the girls out to Staten Island to pick up all their costumes. His mother was still working on a few final details, and then she was making Amanda's dress a bit more...kid friendly. She also had the costumes ready for all the kids, including Mason, who Amanda was picking up tonight from her mother's. It was going to be a busy night...and he was having another in a long line of moments where he was incredibly happy that this was his life now.

Carisi walked down the long hallway to his office and bristled when he saw Ms. Maxwell with Declan Murphy coming from the opposite direction. He'd had very little interaction with Jesse's biological father. He didn't think he'd have any at all since Amanda had told him she didn't think it was a good idea for him to be involved in Jesse's life. They'd only met once since Rollins and Carisi went public. An awkward meeting at the Police Benevolent Association ball last year when they'd bumped into him. It would've been even more awkward NOT to say something. Carisi couldn't get the memory of this big burly cop pistol whipping him when they were both undercover so many years ago. Murphy looked different now, but that image would always be in Sonny's head. Not to mention the fact that this man knew Rollins was having his baby, even flew back to the states to confirm it...and still chose to walk away. That blew his mind.

"Counselor." Ms Maxwell caught his eye as they drew closer. "I see the beard is still here." She smirked. She'd told him originally that she wasn't sure how she felt about it, but there were no rules against it so she couldn't flat out forbid it. When he told her it was temporary, and why, she changed her tune.

"Your daughter must be thrilled you're going to such...lengths for her."

"Well...actually Jesse is", his eyes darted over to Murphy, "but...at first, Billie cried when it started to grow in." He wasn't sure why he shared that...a part of him felt a little territorial and maybe jealous when it came to Declan Murphy. If this man had behaved differently when Jesse was born, then Sonny might not have this life. All those days and nights Sonny and Amanda had bonded over Jesse...that could've been Declan. That's when Sonny fell hard for Amanda...what if it had been Declan… He tried not to think about it.

He smiled back at Ms. Maxwell, then his eyes nervously flitted back to Murphy.

"Captain Murphy…" Carisi held his hand out, whatever feelings he had about the man, Carisi was good at his job, and surely this was work related. Murphy nodded, clearly surprised. Maybe Ms. Maxwell hadn't told him who she was bringing him to.

"Hate Crimes has asked me if I could lend them my best to try and work out a plea for them." Maxwell placed a hand on Carisi's shoulder, then hesitated. She seemed to recognize a bit of a strange vibe between them. "You two already know each other?"

Murphy and Carisi both nodded and Murphy told her, "We've met."

He opened the door to his office, letting them both in.

Twenty minutes later, just as they were wrapping up explaining the case to Carisi, he heard a woman's voice out in the hall. "Do not run!" It was Sienna. A moment of panic hit Carisi in the stomach. He'd almost forgotten the girls were being brought here so he could take them with him out to Staten Island. Murphy had only seen Jesse in photos, never in person. This was what Amanda had wanted...and now, he was about to meet his daughter…well, biological daughter. In every way that mattered, Dominick 'Sonny' Carisi was her dad.

"I'm sorry…" He didn't have a chance to finish, because Jesse and Billie came barreling around the corner into his office. They didn't even see the other adults sitting on the sofa, just their dad leaned up against the front of his desk.

"Daddy!" Both of them crashed into his legs talking at the same time as they often did now. Both vying joyfully for his attention. Carisi picked Billie up as Jesse ran around to sit in his chair. Billie put both hands on the sides of his face. She'd gotten so used to the beard that she loved holding his face. Jesse froze when she saw there were other people in the office. Sienna stood, looking apologetic but Carisi waved her off.

"Thanks Sienna, I got 'em." Their beloved nanny blew them both kisses and left them in the care of their dad.

Ms. Maxwell stood up, grinning from ear to ear watching the display before her, and joined Carisi at his desk. "Your dad has told me so much about you girls, I feel like I already know you." She gave Billie's arm a light squeeze. Billie, always shy with new people, buried her face in Carisi's neck. He realized in that moment; she'd only seen them in photos too. If he was worried it might appear unprofessional to his boss having them come to work, the look of delight on Lorraine Maxwell's face put that thought to rest.

"You must be Billie."

"Can you say hi to Ms. Maxwell?" Carisi tried to turn so she could see Billie's face. Billie just snuggled deeper into him. The muffled 'hello' that followed made Ms. Maxwell laugh. She patted the younger girl's back then she walked around the desk. "And Ms. Jesse. Your dad tells me you might be coming to work for me in a few years." Jesse broke out into a huge grin and looked proudly over at Carisi.

"I'm gonna be a lawyer like my daddy and put away the bad guys." Jesse beamed with pride at Ms. Maxwell's words, but Carisi felt his stomach drop when he saw Murphy's face. All the color had drained from it, and he finally stood up. It must have stung hearing Jesse use daddy in reference to another man.

"You know what...we can uh... finish this up on Monday...Counselor." Murphy stalled at the door watching Jesse giggle as Ms. Maxwell continued talking to her. Carisi eyed him. It looked something like...regret on his face. Finally Murphy turned back to him and nodded before he walked out the door. It seemed like acceptance on Murphy's behalf. Jesse was happy. Amanda had been right. Introducing Murphy now would disrupt her whole life. He was the one who chose to be gone for her first six years. In the beginning, Amanda had emailed him photos regularly, but after a while it just became something she only did once a year. A picture at Christmas or on Jesse's birthday. She was hearing almost nothing back from Declan, so she moved on. It wasn't fair of him to show up now and expect to be a part of her life...of their life. Especially now...Amanda was finally supremely happy. With Sonny and her girls, Amanda had the family she'd yearned for her entire life.

Amanda had made it clear to Murphy that if Jesse asked, she would absolutely give her the opportunity to meet him. And when she was older and could understand all of this, maybe she and Carisi would sit her down and ask her if she wanted a relationship with him. And that was pretty much the end of it. Luckily Murphy was basically a good man, he recognized this was the best thing for Jesse, and he had not pushed or pursued legal action. Carisi tried to put himself in Murphy's shoes and feel bad for the man...but he couldn't. There just was no universe in which Dominick Carisi walked away from a child that was his. Even if he wasn't in love with the child's mother...

~oOo~

Hours later, when they finally had a few moments alone together, Sonny told Amanda what happened.

"So he didn't even introduce himself to them? Hmpf. Okay." They were finishing off a bottle of wine out by the fire pit after an incredibly busy afternoon and evening. The new outdoor furniture assembled just in time for this perfect fall weather. Sonny and Amanda sat together on the loveseat facing the back yard. Red and golden yellow leaves covered the grass. The sun had gone down, and giggling could be heard from inside the glowing tent. Jesse, Billie, and Mason were in there with a flashlight. Sonny had promised them they could spend some time out there before bed. He was almost positive all three of them were going to fall asleep inside that thing and he'd end up having to carry them inside. Again, he thought about how much he loved his life.

"No, he pretty much walked out, it was awkward, but I don't think Ms. Maxwell noticed. I've gotta meet with Hate Crimes again Monday. I'm wondering if he'll send Khaldun this time...avoid me altogether."

Amanda snuggled closer to him under the blanket he put over them. With her free hand she caressed the beard that had really grown on her. Changing the subject, she first drained the last of the wine in her glass.

"So we're really saying goodbye to the beard tonight, huh."

Sonny grinned and raised his eyebrows. "So you do like it!" He playfully elbowed her.

Amanda nuzzled his neck, her voice lowered. "Let's just say, I learned to appreciate it, but I'm gonna be excited to have clean shaven Sonny between my thighs again."

His arm tightened around her legs that she had curled over his lap, and he leaned over to capture her lips with his.

He growled when she finally broke the kiss. "How fast can I get these kids up to bed?" She nuzzled his nose with hers and used her leg to slowly rub back and forth against his jeans.

"Mmmmm that sounds nice, Counselor."

Then he closed his eyes and shook his head. "Wait...I can't shave it tonight. I gotta let Billie help so she doesn't freak out again. Not to mention the stash is still here till Saturday."

"It's a date then? Saturday?" Amanda started pressing kisses against his neck, just below the beard. Creating just enough suction with her lips, but not so much to leave a mark. They were going to an elementary school tomorrow after all.

"That doesn't mean I can't take care of you tonight though," she whispered, wickedly, her calf continuing to move up his thigh.

"You're killin' me here Rollins." He groaned, jokingly, and she backed off. They still had three rambunctious children who'd be up for at least another hour or two.

Sure enough, by the time they'd finished the bottle, laid out everyone's costumes for the next day, and cleaned up the kitchen, all three kids plus Frannie were sound asleep in that tent.

Sonny hunched down, his tall frame bending in half to fit through the tent opening. He roused Jesse and Mason, getting them to walk on their own out to Amanda, who led them back into the house. They'd been smart enough to make the kids change into pjs before heading out to play in the tent. Then he picked Billie up. She opened her eyes for a second, and her arms wound around his neck so naturally, as he carried her inside, Frannie yawning and following behind. When he made it upstairs, Amanda was just tucking Mason into the trundle bed. Jesse already back asleep. Sonny gently laid Billie down, Amanda had pulled her covers back.

"Love you, Billie," he whispered as he tucked her in.

"I love you, Daddy", she mumbled. His heart still skipped a beat when either of his girls called him that. He looked up, meeting Amanda's eyes. He could tell, her heart did the same thing. They traded places, and Amanda kissed Billie while he did the same with Jesse, and Mason. His nephew had already had such a rough life in his first few years. Things were definitely better now. Amanda's mother, by all accounts, was great at being grandma. Mason was adjusting pretty well to living with his grandparents. Now what would happen once his mother got out of jail...that was a big unknown. Amanda had conversations with Beth Anne about it. The hope was that Kim would stay with Beth Anne and Jim, that way, Mason wouldn't be uprooted again. After all, Kim had a much better relationship with their parents than Amanda did. Maybe it would be okay with all of them together in one house. Only time would tell.

They stood in the doorway watching them sleep for a moment. Amanda pulled Sonny's arm around her and wrapped her arms around his waist. He kissed the top of her head.

Back in their room, Amanda hadn't forgotten her earlier promise. As soon as their door was closed, she took his hand, leading him towards the bed. He pulled her body against him, kissing her deeply.

Amanda's held his face in her hands, then slowly dragged her nails down the front of his shirt to unbutton his jeans. She started to go down on her knees, but he pulled her back up to him.

"Manda...you don't have to—" But she cut him off, pressing her index finger to his lips.

"Dominick Carisi...when have you ever known me to do something I don't want to do", she paused, then added, "in the bedroom." She kissed him again.

"Don't you know?" she asked, when they broke apart, breathless. She pushed him down on the bed and straddled him, wincing when her bad knee hit just the wrong spot. He caught her discomfort and shifted her so most of her weight was all on him.

"You know how much it turns you on when you...are...there for me." Amanda kissed him, light at first, then coaxing his tongue out to play while she rolled her hips against him. His hands tightened around her waist, and she broke the kiss. She lovingly caressed the side of his face.

"Don't you know? Can't you tell? It's the same for me." He raised his eyebrows in surprise.

She rolled her eyes but smiled. She got off his lap and pulled him up with her.

"Let me show you?" When she started to go down on her knees again, he stopped her, again. This time pulling her back to the bed.

"Your knee." He swept his hand lightly from her knee up her thigh and sat down next to her.

She felt a sudden rush of love for him. Giving her butterflies but filling her soul at the same time. He could go down on his knees no problem, but he knew how much her one knee bothered her, and he wasn't about to let her be in any pain. Fine, she could work with this.

Amanda pushed him back against the pillows and grinned salaciously while she started to unbutton his jeans...he was helpless against her when she set her mind to something...

"I told you." She giggled afterwards, crawling back up to lie next to him, letting him take her in his arms.

"You never said...I never knew..." He couldn't finish a sentence. He'd always assumed she was just showing him how much she loved him. That's why he'd never once asked her for... He was completely satisfied, being with the love of his life meant their sex life was always fulfilling, and it made him supremely happy taking care of her. It hadn't occurred to him that she felt the same way.

"It's never been that way for me before." She nuzzled against his neck and traced a finger through his beard as sleep began to overtake her.

"I love you...so much," she whispered, and his arm pulled her tighter against him.

"Love you too."

"Set your alarm early." She nudged him. He reached for his phone.

"Yea. Yea. If I'm gonna make it through seeing you in that dress all day tomorrow, I'm gonna need to have you at least twice before the kids are up."

Amanda giggled and settled back against him when he set his phone back on the charger. She kissed his shoulder, and fell asleep in her favorite place, wrapped up in his arms.