NOTE: Started to watch the season 3 dvds and got a clear picture of what I wanted to do with the story so I had to go back and change some things, and explain thing better then in the original draft. Chapter 2 might be out some time this weekend but I make no promises, I am at heart extremely lazy.

Not Beta-read, I do not have a beta reader, I desperately need one if you want the job contact me.

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It all started with Buffy from the moment a saw her I wanted her. At the time I foolishly called it love, but that was wrong. Buffy oozed power and a powerful woman is unbelievably attractive. I wanted her with every fiber of my being but alas I could not have her, but that did not detour me I vowed that one day she would be mine.

Time passed and then Kendra came, but she wasn't like Buffy. Buffy had confidents along with power and that made her more attractive, Kendra didn't have that same confidents, so in the end she didn't have as much of hold over me as Buffy did.

I guess if you think about my relationship with Cordelia can be attributed to my attraction to power. She my have not had the power of a Slayer but she had the looks and confidents to bend men to her will. I also have a fascination with the unobtainable; hell I would have never given a second look in the romantic sense if she hadn't got together with Oz. But when she did I realized she was out of my grasp and then I wanted her.

Then came Faith. Faith was a whole different beast; she could walk into a room and every man and a good portion of the women would instantly take notice. She radiated power on whole different level then Buffy. I had to have Faith she was my new obsession. I wanted her more then Buffy and that was something I never thought possible, me wanting someone more Buffy it was just inconceivable. But if I had to choose between the two, Faith would always win. I had Faith for a brief second but the minute she was on top of me I knew I was nothing more then a plaything. That little encounter just deepened my obsession though. I would have another taste but I would make her beg for me first. And maybe I would have both of them beg to be with me, now that me friends was a wonderful thought.

Some times I would ponder the Slayers for hours on end. They fascinated me, what gave them there power and how did it chose who to give it to, was there only purpose to kill vampires or were they meant for more.

One night I came up with an interesting theory about why I was nothing more then a friend or a quick fuck to these two women. A Slayer is the physical perfection of the human body; you could never surpass a Slayer with out taking something foreign into you body. Granted there are more powerful humans on the earth, but they gain this power with mean like letting a vampire take over their body or begging for power from a higher source like in witchcraft. No human can naturally surpass the Slayer.

So if a Slayer were the perfection of the human form it would make sense to say that a Slayer would only be continual interested in some one who was her equal. This explains the whole Buffy and Angel relationship, here was a creature from the race that Buffy was destined to destroy and yet she still anted him, why because he was her equal.

Now that I knew why they didn't want I also knew how I could make them want me, I had to gain what they had and what I lacked power. I knew I would never be able to gain enough power naturally so I would do it supernaturally.

It was around this time that Faith killed a human, the deputy mayor of Sunnydale. I briefly toyed with idea of going to her and trying to talk to her maybe tell her that we had had some kind of connection. But in the light of my resent revelation I knew we had nothing, because she had nothing to connect with in me, but soon she would.

I started my search for power by going looking through my memories as a Scooby gang member; I was looking for anything like a reference in one of Giles' books to an artifact or ritual. Then a remembered that I had what I wanted at one point in my life when the Hyena possessed me. But that spell wasn't perfect in didn't make me nearly strong enough and I was becoming stupid at the end instinct was taking over and replacing intelligence.

With that event in mind it gave me a clearer focus for my research. It didn't take long for me to find the spell I needed roughly translated its called Soul of the Beast. Now granted my Latin skills are pathetic by I was able after some work to translate the spell and what it would do to me, or so I though later it did the most wonderful and unexpected thing to me, but more on the later.

I wouldn't be able to use the Hyena's again they were pack hunters I wasn't going to have a pack so I needed something else. I soon remembered the zoo had a magnificent male leopard, oh yes he would do just fine. Getting into the zoo would be no problem the back fence and a pair of bolt cutters would take care of that. It would take me a day or two to get all the ingredients. By the following week I would have everything I ever wanted.

I had to build up me courage I was terrified of doing the spell. I wasn't scared of what it would do to me I was scared of screwing it up. I had never done big magic like this before so. My mind kept telling me that if you could do it by accredit you could do it on purpose, but that didn't help my nerves too much when the night finally came.

When night fell and I made my way to the zoo. I quickly made my way to the leopard's enclosure, but not with out incident. Not thirty seconds in to the zoo I ran into some trashcans and made one hell of a racket, but the security gourds never showed them selves, obviously they were Sunnydale natives.

I prepared the spell as close the enclosure as possible and it was if the leopard knew what was going on. He didn't make noise or move he just sat close the bars and watched as I prepared. One thing that made this so much easer was that this spell didn't involve a predator act to work; it involved a sacrifice of blood by the caster.

It was time to start. I took my seat in the middle of the circle and stared in to the leopard's eye as I began to chant. As I reached the end of the spell I clasped my hand around the blade of my double edge dagger, a blade against each one of my palms. I squeezed down on the blades letting my blood spill forth in to the circle. Then a beam of yellow light shot form the leopard's eyes t mine but only for brief second, for that was all it took.

I regained by bearings quickly and went about bandaging my hands and then I realized I was exactly the same. I was sure I had failed so I gathered everything up and left. As I was walking away I could have sworn I had heard some one say, "just wait young one, it will come." I quickly turned around only to find the leopard still watching me. Are eyes locked for a brief moment before he turned away. I told my self it was just my imagination and made my way home.

I made it home just as the pain started. It began with skull splitting head ach I barley made to my room before I collapsed. From there it only got worse it felt like every muscle was tearing, every bone was shattering; it was to much and I soon passed out.

I awoke next morning groggy and vaguely remembered searing pain before passing out. That was when I got my first look at my new body. Every ounce of fat that was on me the night before had been replaced with tone muscle, I hadn't bulked up a great deal but all the muscle I had the night before was now sculpted to absolute perfection. My fingernails had domed slightly and when I flexed my hand the right way sharp black claws emerged from under them. My senses flared, I could hear children playing in the school two blocks away. I could smell the flowers in the garden next door, my vision was so clear it was if I was blind before.

Then I looked the mirror and noticed a few changes I hadn't anticipated. My eyes were now a golden yellow, my canine teeth on both the top and bottom of my jaw had extended slightly and now came deadly point, they were not a large as a vampires fanges but they would do. Those things paled in comparison to the biggest surprise yet my hair. It now reached just past my shoulder blades and was now a golden brown just like the leopard and I two lines of small rosettes each one started at my ears and went all the way down the length of my hair.

These changes were very unexpected, but I could careless what any one would think. The spell had worked and I had everything I dreamed of I could feel the power surging through veins I could have torn my house down with my bare hands if I wanted to, that was how powerful I felt. They had to notice me, they had to see I was just what they wanted, they would relies I was perfect. There was no question of that in my mind of that fact. I changed my clothes nothing overly colorful like the old me used to wear, I didn't need those clothes to draw attention any more. I was walking perfection and people would take note of that, or I would make them see that. I put on a pair of blue jeans and a black t-shirt and quickly made my way out of my new house and in to my new life.