Title: Wish List
Author: Donna donna__rose@hotmail.com
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: They're not mine, if you think they are you are obviously either insane or a very dumb lawyer.
Summary: Syd wishes, Vaughn delivers, a happy ending. I dunno, read it and then you can write my summary for me.
Notes: I went out today and saw Lord of the Rings and that was an 8 hour thing what with lunch and shopping and tomorrow I have to be up at 5 to go fishing, so be very impressed that I am up at 11pm writing the notes for ALL FOUR STORIES! But hey I love it and I love it because I love all of the reviews I get. I was upset this morning because there were none there, but that was cause the site broke, but when I got back from the movies, there were heaps, so thank you, I love them and look how hard they make me work. Be warned, none of these have been proofed because I'm way too tired, so any major problems, I apologise in advance. Enjoy them and if you don't know how to get more you're obviously brain dead: reviews!!!!
Chapter Fourteen
Jack nodded first, trying to see if that would do, if that was all he needed to sacrifice but she just continued to look at Jack, confused and unsure. Vaughn too was looking at him, hope and an urgency in his eyes. Trying again, Jack reinforced the nod, "Basically, yes."
It was at this moment that the thought struck Vaughn that he might not pull this off, he'd picked his words so carefully, scared of it coming out wrong and it had still sounded so stupid to his ears and probably hers, so what if Jack didn't fix it, what if Jack ruined it more. Vaughn rarely thought of his future, quite happy to live in the moment, his life full as it was, but when he did there was always mention of Sydney, always.
But what if there wasn't, what if she'd turned and left and he couldn't find her ever again. Would he be able to live like that? It wasn't a question he wanted to face again; Can I live without Sydney Bristow? Sure, every time she went on a mission he was stuck at home, lying in bed, sleepless and asking the same question over and over again. If he walked into work the next day and there was no more Sydney, what the hell would he do?
This was different again; he was stuffed if she left. 'I love her', he thought to himself. It was simple, the thought pure and easy, but a first. Every other time he'd avoided it and said attracted or liked or something else, but just then, when everything was so precious, so volatile, so crucial, he thought it and the realization made him scared and sure and hopeful all at once.
Sydney shook her head slightly, snapping Vaughn from his thoughts, she was opening and shutting her mouth, unsure of what she was expected to do and still completely unaware of what this all meant. Vaughn's voice traveled over to her as though she was in a dream, "Sydney..." She didn't answer him, still waiting for her dad to explain, hoping he could make it all clear.
"Um," it was the first um in Jack's adult life and he hated it, "Look, Sydney," Sydney just looked at him, shocked out of her mind, possibly because two of the leading men in her life were acting so totally wrong. "I know this is hard to accept, but he's telling the truth, there are...exceptions."
She cut him off, "And we're one of them?" Jack nodded, thinking she had finally got it and turned to leave, the situation all too wrong for him. "And you back this?"
He looked at her, shocked by the question. He looked at Vaughn, and saw fear enter his eyes again. He wasn't sure how to answer this one, either way there was going to be a follow up question and either way he was going to end up in trouble, either with Vaughn, not that this scared him, or with anyone heard he'd given them the green light. Shrugging, he'd aimed for indifferent, "Hey, I don't mind. If you want to go, go."
Sydney's face became a severe look of incredulity. "After all of this, you're going to say you don't mind?" He nodded, slowly, not sure what was about to happen. Sydney faltered for a moment, knowing if she pushed this she might throw it all away. Why not settle for half now and not risk losing all to gain all? She didn't need her father's blessing, didn't need to know that what they were doing was right. She just wanted it because she knew without it she could never be sure she was being careful, doing her best and not just hiding behind an unofficial stuff up where the CIA had thought that starting a relationship might have been the right thing but had later changed their minds and not had the balls to say so.
Should she push him? Make sure she had it all worked out, had everything down pat? Or just settle for half of everything when there was a possibility of having a whole? Loosing Vaughn or having him fro real, they were her two choices and neither looked better than the other until she imagined trying to hide it.
What if the CIA decided it was wrong and her father had always known but she hadn't made him say so right now? The relationship would end and they would be back to where they were now but with perhaps years of hurt built up between them and no where left to go and with that thought, she realized that she no longer had this huge choice, she realized that she hadn't to ask him, to push her father into saying what he thought, whether it was a yes or a no, she hadn't to know.
"But, you must have had a hand in setting this up..." he just looked at her, knowing he had made a huge mistake. "Hmmm?" she looked at Vaughn who nodded, "Wanting to just get on with it and give him an answer. "So what? You're just going to leave now? Because I swear if you leave now, I'm going to walk out with you because if you think it's wrong, I'm going to trust you over the CIA."
For a minute, Vaughn thought she was joking, but then he realized that she wasn't and he quickly looked at Jack, knowing that all he had to do to make his daughter happy was say, 'I think it's a good idea,' but positive he wouldn't say it. Jack's eyes flickered to Vaughn's as he obviously went through his options.
He could say nothing walk out and ruin his daughter's life, he could give them both his blessing and risk the downfall of his reputation or he could...well, that was it. No matter what, one thing was going to end up ruined. His reputation or Sydney. She stared at him and memories started coming back in a rush.
She had been three years old when it happened; she'd fallen over while he'd had her in the park. He'd been rung by his senior and had answered the phone, stupidly; he'd also turned his back on her, the action normal for him. When he'd turned back, hanging up the phone she was twenty meters away, in the centre of the park, blood gushing from her knee and whimpers escaping her lips.
From that day forward, whenever he was with her alone, he'd kept his phone off. He'd seen the damage he could do with neglect and hadn't bothered to risk it again.
At her fourth birthday, he'd rushed out of the house at six am, not to return for a week from a mission in France. He remembered kissing his wife at the door before rushing off, her angry cries behind him, a tear running down her cheek and then the guilt the entire time he was on the mission, much of it, just sitting around in cars, watching fat French rich men with a woman on each arm walk in and out of their houses. Someone else could have gone on that mission, he hadn't been ordered, it had been an offer, for an extra credential and a little extra money. And he'd taken it.
When he'd gotten home she'd been in her room, sitting on her bed, the new cover still smelling fresh and foreign in the room. She hadn't cried, hadn't yelled at him, she had acted maturely and it was only when he turned his back that the tiny, four year old Sydney broke down and cried, Jack returning to hold her in her arms for the next hour until she had managed to cry herself to sleep.
That was the last time he ran out on a mission without asking her first. He'd seen that he could hurt her and hadn't tried it again, the guilt and anguish being enough to last a life time the first time around.
And then he's lied to her. Of course there were such lies as Santa Clause, magic and faeries, but when he started lying to her, at first about his work and his safety and when he was coming home and then, when she grew older, about her mother, about SD-6 and about his entire life. And then, in less than a few months, everything had come out and it had hurt both of them. Too much and he had decided to never lie to her again. And he hadn't if she asked, he told her the truth, whether this meatn telling her she wasn't allowed to know or avoiding questions, he wouldn't lie.
And then there were more things, stupid things he'd done only once but once too many times. That he had learnt from but that he had always wished he had learnt the rules before he committed the crime. Now, looking at Sydney, her face stone and her eyes icy while at the same time full or warmth and hope, the emotion only a tiny spark, waiting for him to light it and add the fuel.
Pursing his lips, he scratched his head. "Sydney," she looked at him, hopefully, "I think that." He stopped himself and started again, "This is totally unofficial and I'll deny it if you ever bring it up," she grinned at him, thinking that Jack was kidding, but seeing the serious look, she smothered her laughter and listened carefully. "I started this whole idea, you act irrationally when your handler isn't around, we all know that thanks to this afternoon's performance, and your instinct in better than mine when his life is at stake. I mean, look at France, at going after the antidote at the millions of things you've done wring but done them so well."
He paused and looked around, trying to base everything on facts in the hope that no one would read into this words as them being sentiment. "So I went and looked into it and Devlin backed me up, unofficially," he quickly added, "Agent Vaughn aggress with me," Vaughn dipped his head as he felt both Jack's and Sydney's eyes sweep to him, but Sydney's vision quickly returned to Jack as he continued.
"And I haven't changed my mind. If you think it's best, which you do," he reinforced it with a strong stare, "Then I believe that a relationship," this was where it became awkward, "Between you and Agent Vaughn would perhaps be beneficial to your work with the CIA and SD-6"
He breathed a sigh of relief and looked at Vaughn who nodded at him, thanking him and then, without daring to look at his daughter, Jack spoke, "Now, I have to go and I remind you, this is unofficial and not to be let out of this room."
Sydney watched him leave with high hopes but a closed off face. "Is he serious?" She asked Vaughn who was still watching her, worried that Jack's speech hadn't worked as well as he had at first thought.
"Yes," it was a quick answer and certain. "Of course he is. So am I."
It was sappy, Sydney and Vaughn both saw it for a fluffy little add on, but if almost forced the stony look from her face, one last question to ask before she could grin at him. "So...
Well, okay, I went out and came home and my back hurts and my neck hurts and my fingers and I haven't watched TV in days, argggg, But I love it so review please.
Author: Donna donna__rose@hotmail.com
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: They're not mine, if you think they are you are obviously either insane or a very dumb lawyer.
Summary: Syd wishes, Vaughn delivers, a happy ending. I dunno, read it and then you can write my summary for me.
Notes: I went out today and saw Lord of the Rings and that was an 8 hour thing what with lunch and shopping and tomorrow I have to be up at 5 to go fishing, so be very impressed that I am up at 11pm writing the notes for ALL FOUR STORIES! But hey I love it and I love it because I love all of the reviews I get. I was upset this morning because there were none there, but that was cause the site broke, but when I got back from the movies, there were heaps, so thank you, I love them and look how hard they make me work. Be warned, none of these have been proofed because I'm way too tired, so any major problems, I apologise in advance. Enjoy them and if you don't know how to get more you're obviously brain dead: reviews!!!!
Chapter Fourteen
Jack nodded first, trying to see if that would do, if that was all he needed to sacrifice but she just continued to look at Jack, confused and unsure. Vaughn too was looking at him, hope and an urgency in his eyes. Trying again, Jack reinforced the nod, "Basically, yes."
It was at this moment that the thought struck Vaughn that he might not pull this off, he'd picked his words so carefully, scared of it coming out wrong and it had still sounded so stupid to his ears and probably hers, so what if Jack didn't fix it, what if Jack ruined it more. Vaughn rarely thought of his future, quite happy to live in the moment, his life full as it was, but when he did there was always mention of Sydney, always.
But what if there wasn't, what if she'd turned and left and he couldn't find her ever again. Would he be able to live like that? It wasn't a question he wanted to face again; Can I live without Sydney Bristow? Sure, every time she went on a mission he was stuck at home, lying in bed, sleepless and asking the same question over and over again. If he walked into work the next day and there was no more Sydney, what the hell would he do?
This was different again; he was stuffed if she left. 'I love her', he thought to himself. It was simple, the thought pure and easy, but a first. Every other time he'd avoided it and said attracted or liked or something else, but just then, when everything was so precious, so volatile, so crucial, he thought it and the realization made him scared and sure and hopeful all at once.
Sydney shook her head slightly, snapping Vaughn from his thoughts, she was opening and shutting her mouth, unsure of what she was expected to do and still completely unaware of what this all meant. Vaughn's voice traveled over to her as though she was in a dream, "Sydney..." She didn't answer him, still waiting for her dad to explain, hoping he could make it all clear.
"Um," it was the first um in Jack's adult life and he hated it, "Look, Sydney," Sydney just looked at him, shocked out of her mind, possibly because two of the leading men in her life were acting so totally wrong. "I know this is hard to accept, but he's telling the truth, there are...exceptions."
She cut him off, "And we're one of them?" Jack nodded, thinking she had finally got it and turned to leave, the situation all too wrong for him. "And you back this?"
He looked at her, shocked by the question. He looked at Vaughn, and saw fear enter his eyes again. He wasn't sure how to answer this one, either way there was going to be a follow up question and either way he was going to end up in trouble, either with Vaughn, not that this scared him, or with anyone heard he'd given them the green light. Shrugging, he'd aimed for indifferent, "Hey, I don't mind. If you want to go, go."
Sydney's face became a severe look of incredulity. "After all of this, you're going to say you don't mind?" He nodded, slowly, not sure what was about to happen. Sydney faltered for a moment, knowing if she pushed this she might throw it all away. Why not settle for half now and not risk losing all to gain all? She didn't need her father's blessing, didn't need to know that what they were doing was right. She just wanted it because she knew without it she could never be sure she was being careful, doing her best and not just hiding behind an unofficial stuff up where the CIA had thought that starting a relationship might have been the right thing but had later changed their minds and not had the balls to say so.
Should she push him? Make sure she had it all worked out, had everything down pat? Or just settle for half of everything when there was a possibility of having a whole? Loosing Vaughn or having him fro real, they were her two choices and neither looked better than the other until she imagined trying to hide it.
What if the CIA decided it was wrong and her father had always known but she hadn't made him say so right now? The relationship would end and they would be back to where they were now but with perhaps years of hurt built up between them and no where left to go and with that thought, she realized that she no longer had this huge choice, she realized that she hadn't to ask him, to push her father into saying what he thought, whether it was a yes or a no, she hadn't to know.
"But, you must have had a hand in setting this up..." he just looked at her, knowing he had made a huge mistake. "Hmmm?" she looked at Vaughn who nodded, "Wanting to just get on with it and give him an answer. "So what? You're just going to leave now? Because I swear if you leave now, I'm going to walk out with you because if you think it's wrong, I'm going to trust you over the CIA."
For a minute, Vaughn thought she was joking, but then he realized that she wasn't and he quickly looked at Jack, knowing that all he had to do to make his daughter happy was say, 'I think it's a good idea,' but positive he wouldn't say it. Jack's eyes flickered to Vaughn's as he obviously went through his options.
He could say nothing walk out and ruin his daughter's life, he could give them both his blessing and risk the downfall of his reputation or he could...well, that was it. No matter what, one thing was going to end up ruined. His reputation or Sydney. She stared at him and memories started coming back in a rush.
She had been three years old when it happened; she'd fallen over while he'd had her in the park. He'd been rung by his senior and had answered the phone, stupidly; he'd also turned his back on her, the action normal for him. When he'd turned back, hanging up the phone she was twenty meters away, in the centre of the park, blood gushing from her knee and whimpers escaping her lips.
From that day forward, whenever he was with her alone, he'd kept his phone off. He'd seen the damage he could do with neglect and hadn't bothered to risk it again.
At her fourth birthday, he'd rushed out of the house at six am, not to return for a week from a mission in France. He remembered kissing his wife at the door before rushing off, her angry cries behind him, a tear running down her cheek and then the guilt the entire time he was on the mission, much of it, just sitting around in cars, watching fat French rich men with a woman on each arm walk in and out of their houses. Someone else could have gone on that mission, he hadn't been ordered, it had been an offer, for an extra credential and a little extra money. And he'd taken it.
When he'd gotten home she'd been in her room, sitting on her bed, the new cover still smelling fresh and foreign in the room. She hadn't cried, hadn't yelled at him, she had acted maturely and it was only when he turned his back that the tiny, four year old Sydney broke down and cried, Jack returning to hold her in her arms for the next hour until she had managed to cry herself to sleep.
That was the last time he ran out on a mission without asking her first. He'd seen that he could hurt her and hadn't tried it again, the guilt and anguish being enough to last a life time the first time around.
And then he's lied to her. Of course there were such lies as Santa Clause, magic and faeries, but when he started lying to her, at first about his work and his safety and when he was coming home and then, when she grew older, about her mother, about SD-6 and about his entire life. And then, in less than a few months, everything had come out and it had hurt both of them. Too much and he had decided to never lie to her again. And he hadn't if she asked, he told her the truth, whether this meatn telling her she wasn't allowed to know or avoiding questions, he wouldn't lie.
And then there were more things, stupid things he'd done only once but once too many times. That he had learnt from but that he had always wished he had learnt the rules before he committed the crime. Now, looking at Sydney, her face stone and her eyes icy while at the same time full or warmth and hope, the emotion only a tiny spark, waiting for him to light it and add the fuel.
Pursing his lips, he scratched his head. "Sydney," she looked at him, hopefully, "I think that." He stopped himself and started again, "This is totally unofficial and I'll deny it if you ever bring it up," she grinned at him, thinking that Jack was kidding, but seeing the serious look, she smothered her laughter and listened carefully. "I started this whole idea, you act irrationally when your handler isn't around, we all know that thanks to this afternoon's performance, and your instinct in better than mine when his life is at stake. I mean, look at France, at going after the antidote at the millions of things you've done wring but done them so well."
He paused and looked around, trying to base everything on facts in the hope that no one would read into this words as them being sentiment. "So I went and looked into it and Devlin backed me up, unofficially," he quickly added, "Agent Vaughn aggress with me," Vaughn dipped his head as he felt both Jack's and Sydney's eyes sweep to him, but Sydney's vision quickly returned to Jack as he continued.
"And I haven't changed my mind. If you think it's best, which you do," he reinforced it with a strong stare, "Then I believe that a relationship," this was where it became awkward, "Between you and Agent Vaughn would perhaps be beneficial to your work with the CIA and SD-6"
He breathed a sigh of relief and looked at Vaughn who nodded at him, thanking him and then, without daring to look at his daughter, Jack spoke, "Now, I have to go and I remind you, this is unofficial and not to be let out of this room."
Sydney watched him leave with high hopes but a closed off face. "Is he serious?" She asked Vaughn who was still watching her, worried that Jack's speech hadn't worked as well as he had at first thought.
"Yes," it was a quick answer and certain. "Of course he is. So am I."
It was sappy, Sydney and Vaughn both saw it for a fluffy little add on, but if almost forced the stony look from her face, one last question to ask before she could grin at him. "So...
Well, okay, I went out and came home and my back hurts and my neck hurts and my fingers and I haven't watched TV in days, argggg, But I love it so review please.