January 6th, 2002 - January 8th, 2002
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This chapter takes place about right after the last one.
You know what I just realized? I just realized that if Carol left in Season 1, she never would have met Jeanie. So....Now that I already posted the previous chapter and cannot fix that, I'm just going to say that Jeanie was there from the beginning too. That'll just make everything with the last chapter and this chapter much easier.
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Tess and Kate headed back into the kitchen where Doug and Carol were finishing up their coffee.
"Hey." Carol said to the girls. They nod and stand beside the table.
"We wanna spend the night with Daddy." Tess said. Kate nodded.
"Well you can't tonight because Daddy has to work in the morning." Carol said. Tess and Kate both looked at Doug. He nodded.
"Not tonight, girls. But I don't have to work Friday or Saturday. You could spend the day with me Friday and stay the night." He suggested. They nodded.
"Can we, Mommy, can we?" Kate asked, getting excited. Carol nodded.
"If that's what you want."
"Yup!" Kate said happily.
"We will only spend the night if you do too, Mommy." Tess informed them. Carol glanced at Doug.
"Girls, I'm sure you can spend the night all by yourself with your father." Carol said. The girls shook their heads.
"No!" Kate said. "I wanna spend the night with Daddy and Mommy!" She said, putting her hands on her hips and glaring at Carol.
"It's fine with me, Carol." Doug said. Carol sighed and looked at him.
"No, it's not fine." Carol said, growing uncomfortable. They were all ganging up on her.
"Please Mommy." Tess asked quietly, putting on her best puppy dog face. Doug chuckled and tried to disguise it once again for a cough. "Just one night." Tess said. Carol sighed and rolled her eyes.
"Fine." She muttered.
"Yay!" The girls yelled and cheered and dashed off to the living room. Doug laughed.
"They've got you under lock and key." Doug said. Carol glared at him. He lifted his hands. "Hey, truce! They did it, not me."
"You didn't help any."
"Is it such a bad thing, spending one night with me?" He asked, becoming somewhat serious. She stared at him, so confused. She didn't know what to say. Instead she just turned and headed into the living room with the girls. Doug watched her go and he sighed. "Apparently so." He whispered and then followed them into the living room.
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The next night around 9 PM Doug was just arriving home from being at work all day. Just as soon as he walked in the door, the telephone rang. He hurried toward it and picked it up.
"Hello?" He asked.
"Hey Doug." He heard Carol's voice on the other end.
"Oh, hey Carol. What's up?" He asked.
"Nothing, I just wanted to make plans about what we are doing tomorrow." She said.
"Alright."
"I have an interview at County at 4 PM with Romano, Kerry, and Mark."
"Well good for you!" He said.
"Yeah, I called Mark and asked him about it and he said that I was hired as long as Romano cleared it. So Romano requested a meeting, probably because of all the buzz that's going on about me, and that's tomorrow at 4."
"You'll definitely get it." Doug said.
"I hope so." She replied. "Anyhow, I didn't know what time you wanted me to bring the girls over. Plus I sort of need a babysitter for when I am at the hospital."
"I'm their father, of course I'll watch them."
"I know you will, I just wanted to ask you." He nodded.
"Okay. You can drop them off anytime."
"How about I just drop them off before my interview." Carol suggested.
"That's fine by me." He replied.
"Okay. Well then I'll see you tomorrow at about 3:30 then."
"Alright. I'll talk to you later, Carol."
"Bye." She said.
"Bye." He replied and they hung up.
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The next day the twins and Doug were sitting in Doug's living room, watching television when Carol arrived home from her interview. Doug looked at her, expectantly, waiting for the good or bad news. Carol didn't say a word, just smiled at them and listened to the girls recount all the adventures they had encountered watching cartoons. Carol listened intently and then just went into the kitchen. Doug looked at her, puzzled. He got up and walked into the kitchen after her. She was pouring herself a glass of water when he went in.
"So?" He asked.
"So what?" She asked. He sighed.
"Carol...the job? Did you get it?"
"Ohhh, that." She said and smiled at him.
"Carol..." He said. She laughed.
"I got it!" She exclaimed, not even touching the water and then she laughed.
"Woohoo!" Doug shouted and she laughed even more. "So are you head nurse again, or not?" He asked.
"Well they said that I could go back as just a regular nurse for awhile and if I decided I thought I could take on more, then I could be the head nurse. Haleh is fully willing to give up her position as the head nurse." Carol said. Doug laughed.
"She bitches about that a lot." He said. Carol smiled. What Doug and Carol didn't know was that Doug's shouting had intrigued the girls. So they had crept up to the kitchen and were peeking around the corner. "C'mon, dance with me!" He said and held out a hand.
"What?" She asked and just stared at him. He laughed and grabbed her waist and twirled her around.
"We have reason to celebrate." He said. Laughter began to bubble up inside of her and she just let it loose, not caring right now what happened. He tangoed with her across the kitchen and they both laughed. He twirled her under his arm and she twirled back up against his chest. The girls giggled quietly behind the way, but Doug and Carol were so caught up in the moment that they didn't hear. Then he dipped her back and her curls danced along the floor for a few seconds before he lifted her back up to him. She laughed and leaned against him and he couldn't contain himself any longer. He leaned down and pressed his lips to hers. Carol's eyes flew open, but her lips stayed on his. He felt her jolt and he only knew that holding her had led to needing and wanting. She watched his eyes as he kissed her before something inside of her shifted and she realized what was happening. Her eyes slid closed and she sank into him. The heat from his body seeped into hers and melted her. Even though they stood perfectly still, Carol felt like she was tumbling. She lifted her hand to his cheek and touched, always wanting to touch.
A few moments later, Doug realized that he couldn't continue this or else he'd want even more and they couldn't take more, not now, not yet. He pulled back and she stared up at him, breathless. The girls quietly tiptoed back to the living room.
"Daddy kissed Mommy." Kate whispered. Tess nodded.
"Do you think they love each other now? And are gonna get married?" Tess wondered aloud. Kate nodded and Tess nodded back at her. Back in the kitchen Carol was pulling herself out of his arms.
"Doug, I.." She started but he cut her off.
"No, Carol, it was my fault. I'm sorry." She nodded. "Why don't we go get the girls and see if they want to go out to dinner to celebrate." He suggested. Carol nodded once more. He smiled quickly and walked to the living room where the girls pretended they hadn't seen anything.
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For the rest of the night, Doug and Carol didn't talk much to each other. Only when it was polite and needed. But the twins didn't notice. They were just excited because they thought they would all get to live together now.
When Carol was putting Tess and Kate to bed in Doug's spare bedroom after he had given them bedtime stories, Kate couldn't hold it in any longer.
"Mommy, are you and Daddy gonna get married and we're all gonna live together?" Kate asked and Carol looked at her.
"We saw you and Daddy kiss." Tess supplied. Outside the room, Doug stopped just beside the door, having heard Tess' comment. He wanted to hear Carol's reply without her knowing he was there.
"Girls....I." She stopped. "It's not the simple." She said.
"Why not?" Tess asked.
"Your daddy and I just kissed as friends. He was congratulating me on my new job." Carol said, trying to think of something.
"It didn't look like a friends kiss." Kate said.
"Yeah, when you kiss Uncle Chuck it's not like that. It's always on the cheek." Tess said. "Uncle Chuck is your friend."
"Well...Uncle Chuck is a different kind of friend." Carol said, trying to pull something out of her mind that would satisfy the girls, even if they were sort of lies.
"So we aren't going to live with Daddy, all three of us?" Kate asked. Carol shook her head.
"No, baby, we aren't."
"But Mommy, we wanna live with you and Daddy." Tess said, her voice quivering.
"Yeah." Kate replied, both of them with tears in their eyes. Carol looked at them helplessly.
"Girls, I'm sorry. I know how much you want us all to live together, but we just can't."
"Why?" Tess asked, tears streaming down her face. Kate buried her face in her baby blanket, keeping nothing but her eyes peeking out.
"I.." Carol didn't know what to say. Doug could sense the distress in Carol's voice, so he decided he should go in and rescue her. He walked into the room and they all three looked at him. The girl's with tears in their eyes and on their face, and Carol with stress written all over her face. He sat down beside Carol, squeezing her shoulder gently.
"What are my little flowers crying for?" He asked. "Where's the sunshine I like to see on your face?" He asked. This made Kate giggle.
"I'm not a flower, Daddy." Kate said.
"You are!" Doug insisted. She giggled and shook her head. Tess' tears had stopped, but she wasn't happy. She wouldn't be happy unless she lived with her entire family. Doug looked at Tess and smiled at her. She just looked at him. He glanced at Carol and worry was etched in her brow. He reached out and touched Tess' curls.
"C'mon, it's time for bed." He said. The two of them tucked the twins in before they left the room and headed downstairs. Carol sat on the couch and just stared. Doug sat beside her and looked at her.
"You okay?" He asked. She nodded.
"Yup. I'm fine."
"They're just kids, Carol. You can't make them understand."
"I know." She said.
"I'm sorry." He replied.
"I'm tired." She said, trying to ignore him. Doug nodded slowly.
"You can have my bed." He said.
"I don't want it. I'd rather sleep on the couch." She said, looking him in the eye. He nodded.
"Okay." He paused. "I'll go get you some blankets." He said and stood up. He headed down the hallway and stopped in front of a closet that he had filled with various items. He pulled out two blankets and two pillows and carried them back to the couch. She took them from him and smiled slightly.
"Thank you." She said and then began to make her bed.
"You're welcome." He said and stared at her. Then he sighed quietly. "Goodnight." He said.
"Night." She said without looking up at him. He nodded briskly and walked up the stairs, away from her and her cold front. He walked into his bedroom and sat on the edge of his bed after shutting his door. He didn't really know what to do. He wanted to live with the girls and Carol and that's what the girls wanted, but he didn't know what Carol wanted. Well, he could pretty much gather that she didn't want to live with him, from what she told the girls, but he wanted to know if that was the truth, or just what she was telling the girls. He sighed and laid back on the bed, too confused to change into pajamas just yet.
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The next morning the girls had gone into Doug's room and jumped on him to wake him up. He had woken with a surprise, not used to be wakened by a couple of kids. But he thoroughly enjoyed it and tickled them on his bed for awhile.
"I'm hungry." Kate announced.
"Well why don't we go downstairs and fix some breakfast." Doug suggested. Kate and Tess nodded.
"And wake up Mommy." Tess said. Doug nodded.
"Okay, if you want to." He said. The girls both nodded again. The girl tiptoed quietly down the stairs and into the living room where Carol was sleeping on the couch. Doug followed them quietly. "Wake her up." Doug whispered. Tess shook her head.
"No, Daddy, you kiss her first." Tess said. Kate giggled and nodded eagerly.
"Yeah, Daddy, you kiss her first." Doug shook his head, nearly grinning.
"Girls, I can't do that." He said, even thought he very much wanted to.
"Why not? You kissed her yesterday." Tess whispered.
"Yeah, Daddy, it's the same thing." Kate said, urging him on. He chuckled quietly under his breath.
"Do it, Daddy, please. She'll like it." Tess said. Doug chuckled some more.
"Okay. Once." He said and walked to the couch. He got down on his knees and looked at the girls. They giggled and nodded. He bent over Carol and shook his head briefly before pressing his lips to hers softly. Then he pulled away. She didn't stir. Kate and Tess sighed. That wasn't the plan.
"Again." Tess ordered. Doug nearly laughed.
"Tess.." He said.
"Again." Kate ordered this time. Doug couldn't help but grin. He sighed and bent over Carol. The girls crept closer. He pressed his lips to Carol's letting them linger.
Through the fog of sleep, Carol could feel lips on hers. Doug. She immediately knew it was him. She stirred slightly and the girls covered their mouths with their hands and giggled. Carol didn't hear or feel anything but Doug's lips on hers. Then he pulled back. She moaned slightly in her sleep and the girls giggled some more.
"Again, Daddy, again." Kate said. Doug chuckled and leaned over Carol, capturing her mouth again. Carol pushed back, kissing him, thinking it was all just a dream. Doug nearly moaned now that she was nibbling back against his lips. He had to pull back, so he did.
"More!" Tess said. Doug laughed.
"No, girls, she's almost awake now." He said and Carol, finally hearing the girls, turned her head into the pillow, letting the blush she felt rise to her cheeks hide against the pillow. Well, she thought and turned her head towards Doug and the girls, blinking her eyes open. The girls giggled and Doug couldn't help but grin.
"Morning sleepyhead." He said and he looked so sexy in nothing but his pajama bottoms that she half wished her daughters would disappear somewhere and she could pull him onto the couch and make love to him all day. But that wasn't possible.
"Hi." She said quietly, her voice somewhat raspy from sleep.
"Mommy, I'm hungry." Kate said. Doug chuckled.
"I'll get breakfast started. You stay right where you are." He said and he and the girls went to the kitchen to decide what to do for lunch. Carol turned onto her back and listened to the quiet clatter in the kitchen. She wished that this was how it could always be, only with her waking up in a bed beside Doug. She sighed and shook those thoughts away. That couldn't happen. Why not? she then asked herself. Because it can't, she replied back and sighed. She wasn't sure why, but it just couldn't. She was going to have to talk to Doug about it, too, because he couldn't keep kissing her like that.
Oh but how she wished he'd never stop.
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After they had all sat down to breakfast and the girls were now in the living room watching television as Doug and Carol cleaned up, Carol thought now was as good a time as any to talk to him.
"We need to talk." She said simply. He nodded.
"Okay." He said.
"I just wanted to let you know that you can't go on kissing me like that." She said. He stopped and stared at her. Then he swallowed.
"Alright." He replied, trying not to sound and act hurt.
"It's just that you're getting the girl's hopes up and we can't do that."
"Why not?" He asked.
"Because it'll just break their hearts when we can't live together. You saw how they acted last night." She said.
"Yes, but why can't we live together?" He asked.
"First of all we aren't dating." Carol said.
"And we can't change that?" He asked. She stopped and stared at him.
"No."
"Why?" He asked.
"Because." She said simply. They stared at each other for a few minutes.
"Would it be that bad?" He asked her. She didn't reply. He put down the dish towel he had been holding and stepped closer to her. She backed up until her lower back was pressed against the counter.
"Doug." She whispered, seeing the look in his eyes. He walked toward her until his entire body was pressed against hers lightly. She put her hands on his chest, trying to hold him back. His arms slipped around her, drawing her close with a lazy arrogance and then he lowered his head and kissed her, despite the fact that she didn't want him to. Well, that was a lie. She did want him to, she was just scared for him to. With barely any pressure he could melt her knees and make her grip him just so she could stand. Her mind raced with questions of whether this was right or wrong before it clouded over. But a part of himself made him hold back, made him restrain. She wanted him, he could feel that. But even as his blood began to stir and thicken, his hands pulled her away as if of their own will.
"I know you feel it, don't deny it." He said, staring her deep in the eyes. She shuddered a bit.
"That doesn't mean it can work." She whispered. He pulled away, pissed.
"Why not?" He asked, his eyes heated.
"It didn't work every other time." She said. His eyes flashed with anger and if she could have, she would have backed up farther.
"I changed my entire life around because of you. And yet you still can't see that." He said. She stood perfectly still, staring at him until he turned on his heel and went into the living, hoping his girls could calm him down. Carol stood in the kitchen, her back still against the counter, completely confused.
He had changed because of her? But that didn't make any sense. He had been the exact same until after she had left, so how had she changed him? She sighed and brought her hands to her face, trying to rub the worries out of her.
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On Monday Carol walked into the ER for her first day of work. Carol had enrolled the girls into a new elementary school which they were starting that day. When they got out Helen was going to pick them up and they had decided that that's what they would do every day that Carol had to work. Carol was grateful and Helen was thrilled to death to get to see her granddaughter's every day instead of twice a year as before.
Everyone was glad to see Carol back and everybody seemed to want to talk to her all day. She liked getting to see her friends again, but the attention was overwhelming. All she wanted to do was work. A little later Carol and Doug were working on a trauma together.
"We saved that one." Carol said. Doug smiled.
"Yeah, we did. You did a good job." She grinned at him.
"What, do you think I can't do my job anymore?" He shook his head.
"No, I knew you'd do fine."
"I just hope nobody dies today." Carol said. He nodded.
"I hope that every day, especially about kids." He said. Carol nodded.
"I'm hungry. Have you eaten lunch yet?" She asked. Doug shook his head.
"No, I was about to head to the cafeteria. You wanna come?" He asked. She nodded.
"That'd be great." She said. They walked to the admit desk and told Randi where they'd be if anybody needed to contact them before they headed up to the cafeteria. They went through the line and got a tray which Doug carried before they took a seat. Carol took her plate and Doug took his and they began to eat their lunch.
"So, I was thinking." Carol said and took a bite off her fork. Doug looked up at her.
"Yeah?" He asked.
"Well, the girls were bothering me all weekend about moving in with you." Carol said. Doug's heart started to pound. "And it's very, very hard to resist those girls, especially when they want something that bad." She paused and watched him, waiting for his reaction. "So I was wondering if you would want to give it a try." She said.
"Honestly?" He asked. She nodded.
"Yeah. I haven't found an apartment yet and all of our stuff is in storage, except our clothes. So all we would have to do is clean up the hotel room and we'd be ready." Carol said. Doug stared at her.
"Why the sudden change of mind?" He asked. She shrugged.
"I...I don't know really." She paused. "I realized what happened between us happened a long time ago. You may have hurt me then, but you've changed a lot. You love the girls and they love you so much already, even Tess. And I don't want to be the reason why you are kept away from them." She paused again. "And to be completely honest, what I want more than anything in the world is a real family." She said. He reached across the table and squeezed her hand.
"We can always try." He said. She smiled and nodded.
"And that's why I changed my mind. To try."
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Later that night after both Carol and Doug had gotten off work, Carol and the girls had packed up their bags and were moving to Doug's house. When they walked in the door, Doug immediately helped them get settled in. Because it was almost their bedtime, Doug and Carol got the girls ready, even though the girls were never going to go to sleep because they were so excited to be living with both their parents. As soon as Carol and Doug shut out the light and headed downstairs, Tess and Kate began to quietly chatter.
"We did it, Kate, we did it." Tess said.
"I know." Kate said and faced her sister. "We're a family."
"Finally." Tess said and they smiled, snuggling together before closing their eyes.
Downstairs Carol and Doug were sitting on the couch, talking quietly.
"We need to buy them some twin beds." Doug said.
"We have two of them in storage. We can use the same ones." Carol said. Doug nodded.
"That works. What other stuff do you have in there?" He asked.
"Standard stuff. Furniture and kitchen utensils and all that. Mostly stuff we don't need right now." Carol said. Doug nodded.
"Okay. Well we can get their beds and other stuff for their room out tomorrow." Carol nodded.
"That's fine."
"Now we need to worry about our sleeping arrangements." Doug said. Carol's head whipped up and she stared at him. He chuckled.
"What I mean is we only have one other bedroom. But two of us." He paused. Carol stayed absolutely silent. He chuckled. "So what I was thinking is that I could take the couch and you could take the bed. That way you'd be upstairs with the girls, if they needed you." Doug said. Carol shook her head.
"I can't take your bed." Carol said. He smiled.
"It's no big deal, I promise. This couch is quite comfortable." He said. Carol said.
"Look, Doug, it's not so much that...it's just....I don't think I could sleep on your bed...knowing....I.." She stopped. She didn't know how to continue without insulting him.
"Knowing other women have slept there?" He asked. She let out a breath and her shoulders slumped.
"Well...yeah."
"Just to let you know, only two other women have slept there. I've dated two women since you left. One didn't last for very long, only a few months. And I dated Jo for two years." He stopped, waiting for her.
"Yes, but I already feel like I am to blame for you and Jo's relationship ending and I wouldn't feel right sleeping there."
"Carol, be reasonable." He said and she looked at him quickly.
"First of all you weren't the cause of our relationship coming to an end. We both knew that.....it was over." He said, deciding to change what he was going to say. He wasn't ready yet to tell Carol that they ended it because Jo knew he loved Carol more than he loved her. "You and the girls coming was just the catalyst and if it bothers you that much, I'll wash the sheets." Carol sighed. Doug stared at her. "Alright...How about tonight I sleep on the bed and you sleep on the couch. Tomorrow after work I will change the sheets and you can sleep there."
"That's fine, but I still don't feel right taking your bed away from you when we took over your house."
"First of all you did not take over my house. Having my daughters and their mother move into my house makes me happy, it doesn't make me feel taken over. I've wanted this all my life, Carol. A family. A stable family. I never had that and I always wanted it."
"Then why didn't you have that with Jo?" Carol asked, changing the subject back to Jo for a minute.
"Because she wasn't the right person." He said softly and stared into Carol's eyes. Carol's heart pounded, wondering if she herself was the right one, but she quickly looked away. "I don't want you to sleep on the couch every night and you don't want to take my bed every night, so why don't we just take turns?" He asked.
"What?" She replied.
"Every other night we will switch. I'll take it tonight and then you'll have it tomorrow and then we'll switch again. How does that sound?" He asked. She sighed.
"I suppose that's alright." He laughed.
"You're so stubborn." He said.
"Me?" She asked and stared at him. He laughed some more.
"Yes, you."
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A week later Carol was at work and Doug had the day off so he was watching the girls since it was a Saturday and they didn't have school. Kate and Tess had just finished breakfast and were now sitting beside Doug on the couch, watching television. Suddenly Kate turned to look at Doug.
"Daddy?"
"Yes, Katie dearest?" She grinned and then continued.
"Why don't you kiss Mommy?" She asked. He chuckled.
"I guess because your mommy doesn't want me to." He said.
"How come?" Kate asked.
"I dunno, baby."
"She wanted you to the other day." Tess said. Doug shook his head.
"No, she didn't. I just kissed her anyway."
"So Mommy didn't like it?" Kate asked. Doug smiled. Well he was pretty sure she liked it, she just didn't want it to happen again.
"I think she liked it, but it made her sad."
"Why does it make her sad if she likes it?" Tess asked. "I like Rugrats and it doesn't make me sad. I like Katie and you and Mommy and you don't make me sad. I like sugar cookies, and they don't make me sad." Tess said. Doug laughed and ruffled her hair.
"Well, it makes her sad because before you guys were even born, I made your mommy really sad. What happened was I kissed her and then I left. It made your mommy sad so she moved to live by your Aunt Molly. And so when I kiss her now, it makes her sad because she remembers when it made her sad before." Doug said, lying only a little. Kate and Tess nodded. "She likes kisses, but since they made her sad once, they make her sad sometimes still." The twins watched him, understanding what he told them, but not really understanding everything that was behind it, that he wasn't telling them. But they turned back to the television, seemingly satisfied with his answer.
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Later that night when Carol was giving Kate a bath, Kate was still thinking about kisses.
"Mommy?"
"Yes, baby?" Carol asked and squeezed the wash cloth out so warm water ran over Kate's back.
"Does it make you sad when I kiss you?" She asked. Carol grinned.
"Of course not, Katie, where'd you get that idea?" Kate stayed silent for a moment.
"This morning I asked Daddy why he doesn't kiss you no more." Carol sucked in her breath. "And Daddy said it's 'cause before we was born, he kissed you and then he left and it made you sad. And so now when he kisses you, it still makes you sad sometimes. So I just wondered if when I kiss you it makes you sad now?" Kate asked, looking up at her mother with big brown eyes. Carol sighed and leaned over the bathtub and kissed Kate quickly on the lips.
"It doesn't make me sad when you kiss me." Carol rubbed her thumb under Kate's eye. "Or when Tess kisses me."
"But it does with Daddy." Kate said. Carol smiled briefly.
"Sometimes, yeah, it does." Carol paused. "But I'll try and work on making it not sad anymore, okay?" She asked. Kate nodded.
"Okay."
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Carol and Doug stood in the between the girl's twin beds after they had tucked them in. Carol turned to Doug.
"C'mere, Doug." She said. He turned towards her.
"What?" He asked. She stepped toward him and leaned forward, pressing her lips to his. He kissed her for a moment but then pulled back and looked at her with a confused look on his face. The twins stared at them, watching intently.
"I'm working on not making it sad anymore." She said. Kate's face lit up and she grinned. Doug nodded, wondering how she'd found out. Well obviously one of the girls had told her, but he hadn't known it. Until now. Carol bent down and kissed Tess and then Kate quickly.
"I love you girls." Doug followed behind her, kissing each twin one last time.
"I love you both." Doug said.
"We love you too." Tess and Kate said at the same time. Carol smiled and shut the light off. Doug followed her out and shut the door halfway behind him. They walked downstairs and headed into the kitchen.
"I didn't know one of them said something to you." Doug said.
"Yeah, when I gave Kate a bath, she was worried that her kisses made me sad."
"Oh." Doug said. "I guess my explanation wasn't so great after all." He said. Carol laughed and began to run the hot water for the dishes they hadn't done earlier.
"So what did you say to them anyway?"
"Well Kate just asked me why I didn't kiss you anymore and so I said that you didn't want me to. And then Tess wanted to know why you didn't want me to if you did the other day. And I said that you didn't really want me to kiss you the other day, but that I just did." Doug cleared his throat. "So then they thought you didn't like it and I had to explain to them that you did like it, but it just made you said when I kissed you because I kissed you before and it made you sad. And apparently Kate thought that meant it made you sad when they kissed you, not just me."
"Yeah. She was really worried about it." Carol paused, unsure whether to tell him the rest or not. Then she sighed. Might as well, she thought. "So I told her I would work on making it not sad anymore." She said and glanced up at him. He nodded.
"So you were putting on a show to make Kate feel better?" He asked. She shrugged.
"Partly." She murmured. He nodded and began to dry the plate she had just washed. They continued washing dishes in silence until they were completely finished. Carol was drying her hands off and Doug was putting away the last dish.
"Doug." She whispered, placing the towel down. He turned and looked at her. "I don't think it would make me sad anymore." She said. They stared at each other for a few moments before he reached out a hand. She took it and let him pull her closer until her body was resting against his. He cupped her cheeks in his hands and rubbed his thumbs under her eyes.
"I'm sorry I ever hurt you." He said. She nodded, accepting it. Then he lowered his head and pressed his lips to hers. She sighed and wrapped her arms around him, holding tightly. For right now she was just going to let herself need him.
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The next day Doug was at work and he had to run upstairs to consult with Jo on a patient. He got off the elevator and asked the desk clerk where he could find her. She gave him the room number and then he went in that direction, looking through the window at Jo. She glanced up and saw him and smiled briefly before turning back to the patient. He waited outside for a few moments until she finished with her patient. She came out of the room and smiled at him.
"Hey." She said. He smiled.
"Hi."
"What do you need?" She asked.
"Oh, I just had a question about Carly Michaels, the little girl who came in yesterday with a severe asthma attack." They talked for a few minutes, consulting about the patient and just getting work out of the way. When they were finished Doug began to walk with her.
"How have you been?" He asked, looking at her tenderly.
"Good actually." She said. He smiled.
"Great."
"How's everything?" She asked him in return.
"Wonderful. You probably heard that they moved in with me." Jo nodded.
"Yeah, I did."
"The twins are wonderful. I honestly cannot believe how much I am enjoying being a father to them. They are like a breath of fresh air every time I see them." He said. Jo smiled.
"That's why I love kids so much." Jo said. Doug smiled.
"Yeah, me too, but with your own kids, it's different. You'll find that out." He said. She smiled.
"I hope so. So how's Carol?" She asked.
"We're working on things. I dunno how things will end up, but I'm trying." He said.
"That's great." She smiled then. "I met somebody." She said. His eyes lit up.
"Who?" He asked, genuinely happy for her. He didn't want her to be alone.
"Well, he's a patient's father, actually. There was a little girl in here a few days ago who had the flu horribly bad. We had to keep her over night and her father was so worried about her. Anyway, we got to talking late that night and he told me how her mother had left the little girl with him and he had only been 23 years old, but he had gotten through it. And he was just so scared for his daughter, but so strong for her. And then later he asked me out." She said. Doug grinned.
"That's great." Doug said. She nodded.
"We've been out twice already and we're going out again tomorrow night."
"I'm so happy for you, Jo." She smiled.
"And I'm happy for you." They grinned at each other and talked some more before they parted ways.
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About a week later Doug and Carol were lying on the couch together after they had put the twins to bed. Carol giggled as Doug ravaged at her neck, and she wrapped her arms around him. He lifted his head and smiled down at her.
"You....are....so beautiful, to meeeee!" He crooned softly, making her laugh more with his playful song. He chuckled and wrapped her up in his arms before he turned over, pulling her on top of him. She folded her hands underneath her chin and leaned on his chest. He stared at her, stroking his hands through her hair. He couldn't believe how much he loved her. When she was gone, he had realized his love for her and it had never really faded. It had even grown a little even though he never saw her. But now that he was spending his time with her and acting like they were a couple again, he had grown to love her so much he thought his heart would burst with it. But he was so afraid to tell her, afraid she would reject him. So he waited.
Carol sighed and leaned her cheek against his chest, just listening to his heartbeat. The way he was acting made her so hopeful. She loved him, she knew, but she wasn't really ready to accept it yet. He acted so different then he used to. She had loved him then, but now she got to see what it was like to have a real relationship with him. One where they lived together, had kids together, and where he didn't leave her every night. Even though they hadn't made love yet, she knew he wouldn't leave her if they did, even if it was only because they were already at his home. And she wanted to make love to him, she just didn't want to ask. She wanted to take the next step in their relationship, but at the same time she was so scared that he would turn into the old Doug and leave her and the girls. She didn't think he would really leave their daughters, but she couldn't bear for him to hurt her again. But she still wanted to make love to him.
Sighing again, Carol lifted her head and looked down at him. He smiled and she felt her heart swell. She slid further up his body until they were mouth to mouth and she turned on her side and he followed her, pressing her back into the couch and making love to her mouth with his own.
They had been making out heavily for a week now and it was nearly killing him. He wanted her so badly, but wasn't sure if she wanted to go further or not. So he decided to try and take it a little farther and see how she reacted. He slid his hand up the back of her shirt just slightly and stroked his fingers against her lower back. She didn't move, and just continued kissing him. He slid his hand up even farther until he felt her bra strap. He slid his hand underneath it and just kept it there, feeling the soft skin of her back underneath is fingers. She sighed and slid her own hand into the front of his shirt, just feeling the texture of him. He began to kiss down her neck, using his lips, his tongue, and his teeth, all very gently. She moaned and scraped her fingernails against his lower stomach. He shuddered a bit and they moved slightly so that he was lying on top of her and she was underneath him again. They kissed heavily for a little while more until he pulled his head away and leaned his forehead against her shoulder.
"I want you, Carol." He said, trying to fight it in case she didn't want him back.
"Let's go upstairs." She whispered. He looked up at her. "Together." She murmured. He smiled quickly and pressed his lips to hers quickly. Then he got up and led her up the stairs.
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