Learning To Love and Learning From Love
A/N: I CAN'T BELIEVE I REACHED 100 REVIEWS!!! THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! THANKS TO ALL OF YOU WHO REVIEWED!!! I'M SO HAPPY!!!!! THANK YOU TO ALL THESE PEOPLE:
EyRieya: Oh, please don't kill me! I'm just trying to write the best I can! I know I made Eriol mean but I'm sure he doesn't want to be, hehe. Thanks for reviewing!
cool camzy blue: Yup, those are the couples in the story! I'm glad you find it interesting. Please keep reading!
SAKURA LOVER: Yeah, I'm taking a lot of stuff from CCS *ashamed* I just hope you think it's good. Thanks for the review! Glad you keep up reading!
ardicana: Ooooooooooh, I'm so glad you love it! Thank you for the enthusiastic review!
Card Mistress: Well, Syaoran has the cards... *shrugs* Well, anyways, thanks for reviewing!
rini124: Here's the next chapter! Glad you like it ^_^ Thank you for the review!
kitty kat: Hehe, I'm so glad that many people think it's interesting! Thanks for the review!
kawaiiaznangel36: Yup, complications, complications. Don't worry, I'll untangle them ^_^ Thanks for constantly reviewing!
Lil DragonLex: Well, even if it seems that E+T will take the longest, I'll try to get their confessions in nearly the same. I do think that they'll take the longest especially in developing feelings, hehe. Thanks for reviewing!
SweetAznPnai4eva: Hehe, I'm sure what you said is true and I'm trying to follow your advice as best as I can -_-; Thanks for encouraging me to go on!
iii_sis: Hehe, why are you sorry? I'm glad you read it at all! Hehe, thanks so much for reviewing all the time!
usal-lover888: I guess the previews are bait for readers, hehe. Not really, though. Thanks for reviewing!
LiL DreameR: Hehe, glad you're liking the story! Thanks for reviewing!
cherrytree: Well, here's the next chapter! I'm glad you like it that much. Never thought that anyone would. Thanks for the review!
I got over 10 reviews this time! Omg, I can't believe it! Thanks to all of you especially the ones that constantly review! I'm glad you all like it and if this is late, as usual, I'm sorry. Well, I'll stop blabbering. Please R+R and Enjoy!
Disclaimer: How stupid of me. I've been forgetting this thing. Well, I don't own CCS or the little scene with Eriol and Meiling in it. They both belong to CLAMP.
Chapter 9: Thinking of You
"..." = Dialogue
'...' = Thoughts
~*~ = Scene/time change
~...~ = POV change
-...- = Italicized words
"Last night, my grandma told me a really great and romantic legend!"
A skeptic look. "Naoko, is it one of your grandmother's stories with ghosts falling in love and stuff?"
Eyes widened in disbelief. "No! This one's actually is quite interesting for your tastes!"
Another skeptic look. "Don't tell me your becoming like Takashi."
A sly smile. "It might show if Yamazaki does love you as much as you love him."
A light blush. "Okay, go on."
A smirk. "It involves a teddy bear."
Eyes widen in surprise. "Really? Your grandmother usually doesn't use things like that as subjects of a legend."
Eyes narrow. "It's a real legend! Now listen."
Full attention.
A deep breath. "There was a boy and a girl who loved each other dearly but couldn't tell each other."
A bored look. "There's a million stories like that."
A glare. "Just keep listening!"
A sigh. "Okay, keep talking."
A smile. "They decided that they should show their love through a gift of a teddy bear."
Intent listening. "Go on."
A smug smile. "They had given each other the bear and were confused at why they had given it to each other. They both found out it was because they loved each other all along."
Disbelief. "Is that it?!"
A smirk. "No. At one point, they had to be separated for a while. They swore each other that if they named the bear they received by the name of the person who they received it from, they'll be together bounded by their love and their destiny is tied."
Dazzling eyes. "It -is- romantic! Such a cute legend!"
Fang-Fei had been listening since the conversation had started. She stared at Chiharu and Naoko, now giggling, wide-eyed at the story she had just heard. A teddy bear... a chain of fate for her and Syaoran. She had to know if it was true. Fang-Fei took a deep breath and strode up to Chiharu and Naoko. She gave a small tap on Naoko's shoulder, whose back was too her.
Naoko turned to Fang-Fei, her eyes widening at who had just tapped her shoulder. "L-Li, is anything wrong?" Naoko asked with Chiharu gaping behind her. They both knew. Everyone did. Fang-Fei had never really gotten close to anyone but Syaoran. Not even Meiling despite the fact that Meiling was her own cousin. Whenever she -did- have something to say to anyone, the conversation would usually be composed of a "Don't get near my Syaoran" and an "okay" or something of that sort.
"Nothing's wrong..." Fang-Fei finally spoke, after some hesitation, but trailed off. Naoko and Chiharu stared on expectantly. "...but... is that story... true?" Fang-Fei asked, clearly embarrassed. "O-Of course not it's because I think my love with Syaoran is doubtful!" she defended quickly without a response from Naoko. Chiharu and Naoko exchanged glances.
"Well..." Naoko began, not really knowing how to answer her question. "Well?" Fang-Fei inquired impatiently. "I'm sure it's true because everything my grandma tells me is true..." Naoko began, a bit uncertain about her question. Chiharu tried to hide her snort. "And... she told me that the story of the girl and boy was the story of her and herself." Naoko added, a smile crossing her face.
Fang-Fei's eyes filled with determination. Determination that she'll maybe reveal if the person she loved so much might love her back just as much. Then she realized that Naoko and Chiharu had been watching her. She wrapped up the look of determination and hope back and threw her head back and laughed. "Hahaha! Of course me and Syaoran will be together no matter what!" She then laughed again and turned away from them, her head still up high. Naoko and Chiharu stared after her. "That was... odd." Chiharu stated and Naoko nodded in agreement.
~*~
She walked along the path in deep thought. Of course her and Syaoran were bounded tight. She loved him and he loved her just as much... somehow her heart didn't agree. A sweet, familiar fragrance filled the air and she looked up to her side to find bunches of peonies hanging from a tree. She smiled as she knew just how special peonies were. Just the simple fragrance in the air reminded her of Syaoran. Syaoran...
She just had to do it. She would ask Syaoran for a bear. If he gave her a bear, her dreams would come true for sure. If he didn't...
Flashback
"Syaoran!" a 9 year old Fang-Fei shouted as she ran up to him. "What's wrong Iowa?" he asked coldly, glancing at her. She giggled in response. "And don't you usually call me Xiaolang?" he asked suspiciously. She giggled again. The giggles were starting to grate on his nerves. "Syaoran, you don't have to call me formally anymore!" she announced happily. "Well, I want to." he stated simply and started walking away. She caught on his arm. He turned back to her.
"Syaoran!" she shouted once again, her voice showing signs of frustration. "What is it?" he asked, impatience showing in his voice. "We're to be married when we grow up!" she announced, her voice filled with excitement. He choked and sputtered at the announcement, shocked.
'But why?!' he thought, looking at the girl smiling happily. She was only part of the Li Clan. Yes, she had magic, but her mother was from the Li Clan. Her father was a non-magic person from a non-magic family. Even if Fang-Fei's father had passed away, -why- would the elders and his mother want him to be married to -her-?
"Promise me you will!" she cried out. He stuttered. He didn't know what to say. He had never spent much time with his cousin before and he even called her by last name. "But if you promise, I'll promise that I'll let you go if you find the person you love best other than me." she said softly, holding out her pinky. He looked at it and hesitantly hook his to hers. With Syaoran's true kindness she had learned of earlier and dashing good looks, it wouldn't be very hard to fall in love with him. Fang-Fei smiled as she looked at their pinky promise. The promise had been made.
End Flashback
And she did. She had fell head over heels in love with him. She had learned to love him. But the question was, had he learned to love her? He never seemed like it, but Fang-Fei had a burning hope in her that he did love her. But if he didn't... if he didn't give a bear in return for her endless love for him... Fang-Fei shook off the thought. A little voice repeated something she had told her Syaoran two years ago.
-"But if you promise, I'll promise that I'll let you go if you find the person you love best other than me..."-
And she would. With much pain. She knew she had to let him go if she loved him so much. She had learned that in courtesy of Tomoyo Daidouji, that girl she had always kept a close eye on. But Syaoran had never shown any sign of interest more than friendship towards her and Tomoyo had barely shown her interest.-Barely.- But if Tomoyo did love Syaoran, she needn't worry.
Flashback
"Daidouji." Tomoyo turned and found herself eye to eye with Fang-Fei's piercing cerulean eyes. "Hello Iowa." Tomoyo said, giving a smile to her. "Daidouji." Fang-Fei repeated, ignoring Tomoyo's greeting. "Tell me what you feel about Syaoran." Fang-Fei demanded, eyes suspicious. Tomoyo had almost spilt it. She had almost let the blood rush to her cheeks, let the horror show in her eyes, let a gasp out. But she hadn't, fortunately for her.
"Syaoran's my best friend, and I love him dearly as a friend." Tomoyo stated simply, knowing that what she was stating wasn't true. Fortunately for her, Fang-Fei didn't notice. "Is that all?" Fang-Fei asked, suspicion still lacing her voice. Tomoyo nodded, wondering just how Fang-Fei had found out that if there was someone to be careful of, it should be Tomoyo.
But Fang-Fei needn't worry.
"So, who do you love?" Fang-Fei asked as she sat down on the bench next to Tomoyo who had been reading a book. (A/N: Hehe, do you notice that I use benches a lot with scenes of Tomoyo? Ok, sorry for the interruption.) "Someone." Tomoyo said teasingly, smiling at Fang-Fei. "Daidouji... I'm warning you... if it's Syaoran-" Fang-Fei started but Tomoyo cut her off. "Don't worry, it's not him." she assured, trying with all her might to hide the truth once again. Fortunately for Tomoyo, it worked again.
"But, it doesn't matter if the person I love doesn't love me back." Tomoyo said wistfully. Fang-Fei gaped at her. "What are you talking about? You should go for your love!" she pressed on, not believing how incredibly strange Tomoyo was. "No. I know he'll never be mine. But I don't need his love. His happiness is mine." Tomoyo said, regretting that she had said the first part. To her luck, Fang-Fei was too shocked too notice that the description kind of matched her Syaoran.
"So what your saying is that your happiness is fed by the happiness of your loved one, no matter who you're loved one is with." Fang-Fei said, confused at how Tomoyo would be able to do that. Tomoyo giggled. "Yup, that's happiness enough for me." Tomoyo declared and got up from her seat. "See you later Iowa." she said and walked off, her heart not really agreeing to what she had said. It was hard, yes very hard for one to live off another's happiness.
Fang-Fei didn't really notice when Tomoyo left. She sat, her mind repeating what Tomoyo had said. She thought of Syaoran and the promise had come back to her. If she loved Syaoran so much... she would have to let him go if he had found another to love...
End Flashback
And since Fang-Fei did love Syaoran more than life itself, she'd let him go, but not without pain. It would hurt a lot to see him with another girl in his arms. It would hurt plenty. But Fang-Fei would rather go through that pain than to see Syaoran tied with her, forever bounded by love that he doesn't even have for her. But she would rather have it so Syaoran would love -her.-
The teddy bear would be a test, a test to see just how much Syaoran really did love her. She had to have it that way or she'll have to see him go. She shook her head. She had been thinking too hard for the past half-hour. Suddenly, she realized that she had reached her small mansion. Since her husband had passed away, her mother had a chance to be back as an official Li family but she had declined, remaining loyal to her husband. She even decided to remain in the small mansion despite the fact that the Li manor was still a lot bigger. Fang-Fei wouldn't have really minded living in the Li manor if it meant that she could spend more time with Syaoran.
Fang-Fei went in through the front door, still in deep thought. Tomorrow at school, she would talk to Syaoran and ask for a bear. She didn't want to tell him today since she was a bit tired after walking around the town all day. The sun had started setting and Fang-Fei sat on her bed, staring out the window at the bright sun sinking behind the horizon.
She didn't know why she was so troubled at heart. She was sure Syaoran would get her the doll... wasn't she? She sighed and continued watching the sinking sun, her thoughts twirling around Syaoran, a bear, her love, his love, and maybe even a bit about a certain emerald-eyed girl with short auburn hair and a big smile.
~*~
'I'm gonna do it today! ...Even if my heart won't be that into it..." Meiling thought as she paced around her room back and forth. The sky was still a darkish blue with hints of pink and yellow in the distance. Meiling had been up before dawn and had been dressed since hours before. She couldn't sleep a wink since she had decided to admit her love to Eriol -today.- She sighed as she went out onto the balcony watching the sun slowly rising in the horizon. She sighed heavily.
"What the heck are you doing up so early?" Feimei asked as she approached Meiling suspiciously. "B-Big sister?! What are -you- doing up so early?" Meiling asked, surprised at her usually lazy sister's earliness. Then Meiling started giggling due to the fact that her supposedly "cooler" older sister was dressed in pajamas while she, herself, were in her school uniform, washed up and ready to go. Feimei glared at Meiling. "What exactly does that supposed to mean?" she asked, her eyes narrowed at Meiling, ready to explode. Meiling just shook her head. "It's nothing." she mumbled, looking down at the ground.
"What's going on here?" a masculine voice asked as the person entered the door. Feimei brightened up as Meiling froze, dreading the moment. "Touya! Good morning!" Feimei yelled loudly, excitement bursting from her voice. "Good morning." Touya said nonchalantly and kept his eyes on Meiling. Again, Meiling looked into his eye. She had made another mistake.
She could feel herself almost sinking into his eyes, the dark color surrounding her. It was uncomfortable yet very relaxing. "What are you doing up so early again?" he suddenly asked, snapping Meiling back to reality. Before she could look into his absorbing eyes once again, she swiftly turned toward the horizon. Her breath caught in her throat as the sun was halfway up.
Bright colors spread from the light making the scene look gorgeous. A small smile lit across her face as she stared, mesmerized by the sunrise. 'I have seen a million sunrises before in my life...' Meiling thought in wonder, her eyes glimmering. 'I must have never gazed at one at this point before.' she concluded, agreeing that this was beautiful.
Suddenly she felt a strong hand on her shoulder. She whirled to find Touya looking at her in concern. She closed her eyes to keep herself from looking at it, -again.- "Are you okay? Why are you awake so early again?" he asked as he looked down at her. Feimei watched from the back, caught in a feeling between mad and amused.
Meiling finally opened her eyes to look at him. She looked down after a moment. "I... just felt like waking up early." she mumbled, feeling very uncomfortable in this situation where his hand was firmly gripping her shoulder and he was looking directly at her. "Is there something bothering you?" Touya asked softly and incredibly gently. "No." she confirmed, trying to sound as sincere as possible.
Touya sighed. He knew it was no use. He had found the members of this tough Chinese family stubborn. There was no way Meiling could be any less stubborn. But when Meiling had looked up into Touya's eyes, he had seen doubt, confusion, fear... whatever was going on in that mind of hers had to be serious, especially if she had insomnia for a few days straight now. He desperately wanted to help her but he didn't know how especially if he didn't even know what the problem was... and the worse part was he didn't know why he cared so much. She was just a little kid like his sister and he hadn't even gotten attached to any other family members that much. It was all confusing and some of the confusion had caused him mild insomnia.
Touya finally released his hold on Meiling's shoulder and turned to leave. He suddenly stopped next to Feimei and looked at her for a while, confusion sketched on his face. "What the heck are you wearing?" he asked after a moment and Feimei just blushed in embarrassment. "Hehe... I, uh... my pajamas." she finally said, her hand to the back of her head. Touya sweatdropped and strode out of the room.
Feimei sighed then turned to Meiling who was still looking to the ground, utterly confused and lost. "Meiling." Meiling looked up and saw Feimei smiling or smirking at her. She couldn't tell. "I think someone has a thing for you." Feimei said slyly. Meiling raised an eyebrow. "What?" Meiling asked, not quite catching on no matter how perceptive she can sometimes be. "You'll know what I mean soon." Feimei told her and went back to her room to dress into her school uniform. "What the hell..." Meiling muttered, staring after her weird, hopelessly romantic sister. She shook her head and turned back to the sunrise which was almost up now.
~*~
"WHAT?!?!?!" a loud scream made its way around the whole Daidouji mansion. Servants, butlers, and maids looked up from their job, all wondering what in the world had possessed the calm and polite Tomoyo Daidouji to scream so loud. "Tomoyo!" Sakura shouted, covering her ears from the loud shrill sound of Tomoyo's scream.
Tomoyo took a moment to take a deep breath and calm down. "Sorry Sakura... could you repeat that again?" Tomoyo asked, hoping with all her might that she had heard wrong. But the chances were against her. Tomoyo had no memory of returning home herself whatsoever. But she can still hope, can't she? It just couldn't be...
"I said, last night, Hiiragizawa brought you home in a piggy-back ride saying he found you asleep on a bench at the park. Is everything okay Tomoyo?" Sakura repeated gently, her inquiry filled with concern. Tomoyo nodded, but she was looking very pale at the moment. "Tomoyo? You're looking -really- pale!" Sakura exclaimed, starting to panic. "No, I'm fine Sakura." Tomoyo reassured, falling into a thinking mode.
Damn. She just had lost her pride. Of course she remembered her run in with Eriol clearly and she couldn't help but fall asleep because of all the emotion pain her heart had been yielding. Now she would have to hear her enemy rejoicing at her little confession and she had spilled the key to her emotion pain. Now Eriol knew it all and who knew if he'd use it for blackmail? But nonetheless she had to... thank him and apologize.
She gulped.
It wasn't a very easy thing to do. Actually if Tomoyo had a list of 'The Most Hardest Things To Do Ever', 'Apologizing/thanking/admitting to Hiiragizawa' would be in the top three. "Tomoyo, I'll go and get ready." Sakura said and got a nod from Tomoyo before dashing out of the room. Tomoyo buried her face in her hands. This would be a very embarrassing afternoon, but Tomoyo couldn't just let it go by. She heaved a sigh and heard a knock at the door. "Who is it?" she asked and her mother came in. "Mother, good morning." Tomoyo said, surprised that her mother had come by. She usually waited for Tomoyo at the breakfast table.
"Tomoyo, is everything alright?" Sonomi asked hesitantly. Tomoyo nodded her head, the fact that everyone thought that something was wrong was starting to grate on her nerves... Well something was wrong but nobody really needed to know... "Are you sure?" Sonomi pressed on, the concern radiating from her. Tomoyo nodded her head vigorously. There was a moment of silence while Sonomi seemed to be studying Tomoyo very carefully. "You're lying." Sonomi concluded.
"What's wrong?" Sonomi asked again, her voice now firm. Tomoyo shook her head again. "Nothing's wrong." she confirmed again. "Is it about..." Sonomi began then stopped. She knew that Tomoyo was just as stubborn as her in... that aspect. What else could be bothering Tomoyo? It sure bothered Sonomi. It was a very painful experience and Sonomi never wanted to experience it again...
Flashback
A small piece of paper fluttered to the floor. A frozen Sonomi fell to the floor on her knees. Tears darkened the carpet as they fell from her eyes. "How could he..." she whispered as her heart shattered into a million pieces. She reread the note to make sure that this couldn't be real... it just couldn't be. Her life was perfect... why?
Dearest Sonomi,
I love you very much. You know that... but I don't think you may truly realize that you love me as much as I truly realize love you... please forgive me for this. I -will- return after you have learned to love me. You can expect that. But not for a very long time. Please take good care of Tomoyo for us and remember that I will always love you.
Love, Konoko
She ripped the note up in half and let the piece fall... she didn't believe a bit of that shit. "What kind of an idiot expects me to learn to love him when I won't even be seeing him? I -do- love him for crying out loud! He just wants to leave this place... well let him leave." she whispered harshly, anger and sadness filling her heart. Of course she realized that she loved him.... that was why she married him... right?
'No...' she thought and she knew it wasn't. She had seen everyone around her age getting married. Her cousin Nadeshiko at age 16, her other cousins around her, her friends... everyone. She wanted to get married so badly but nobody had ever learned to love her with her nasty attitude and her air of importance. Except Konoko. When he had proposed to her, she jumped at the chance and she finally realized that she didn't marry from love... but if she didn't really love him... why was her heart aching so badly?
She looked over to one year old Tomoyo. She was a beautiful child with a patch of dark gray hair and big, lovely amethyst eyes. Sonomi's anger flared again. How could he just leave them with her daughter to still grow up? He was her -father.- She might even grow up without him. But Sonomi knew that he wouldn't come back. She looked over to Tomoyo firmly. 'I swear, my dear Tomoyo, that I won't ever let you get hurt by a man... or love. I swear.' Sonomi vowed, staring hard at the baby that was all hers now. To raise on her own.
End Flashback
And what scared Sonomi was that she might have really, truly loved her husband. Wait, no, ex-husband. There had never been a day when her heart hadn't ached from that. Tomoyo had asked many times when she was younger about her father and where he was. Sonomi had barely managed to force back the tears. Sonomi had simply answered divorce. This had saddened Tomoyo and this may have pushed Tomoyo a bit away from Sonomi but Sonomi couldn't bear to face the truth let alone tell Tomoyo about it.
"Mother?" Tomoyo asked, worried about the deep and lost look her mother had in her eyes for the past minute. Sonomi's attention snapped back and she found Tomoyo staring at her, concerned etched on her face. "Oh, Tomoyo. Yes, let's go down to breakfast." her mother said a bit hurriedly and got up on her feet from her sitting position on Tomoyo's bed.
Tomoyo nodded and got up also and mother and daughter strode down to the dining room.
~*~
"It was very strange, Sakura... Mother was just staring into space with a wistful look. After I got her attention, she was in a bit of a rush and announced that we should hurry and get down to breakfast." Tomoyo said, concern for her mother etched on her face again. Sakura listened intently, concern and curiosity etched on her face as well. Sakura thought for a moment. "I think a memory from long ago was maybe coming back to Aunt Sonomi and maybe she was lost in the thought of that." Sakura suggested and Tomoyo had to smile. Despite Sakura's usual density, she could just be right. But what could be troubling Tomoyo's strong mother...
"Oh, good morning Hiiragizawa!" Sakura suddenly shout out. Tomoyo's shoulders stiffened and she almost stopped her walking. "Good morning Kinomoto." Eriol greeted back, avoiding eye contact with Tomoyo. "GOOD MORNING!!!" a shrill voice shouted and the two turned to find Nakuru in a cheerful mood as usual.
"Hoe? Who's that?" Sakura whispered to Tomoyo. "Tomoyo-chan!!! Hi!!! And you!!! You're so kawaii, just like Tomoyo-chan!" Nakuru shouted, grabbing Sakura in a death grip. "Tomoyo-chan? What's the -chan for?" Sakura whispered/choked out to Tomoyo. "Oh, well you see, little Chinese speaker, in Japanese, they add honorific endings to names! Now what's you're name?" Nakuru asked in one breath, letting go of Sakura. Sakura breathed a sigh of relief.
"Sakura." she answered, hoping that this hyper girl wouldn't shout again or hug her in a death grip. But Sakura liked her cheerfulness though. "OH!!!" Nakuru shouted, causing Sakura to cover her half-deaf ears. "You're Japanese aren't you 'cause Japanese people have names like those and I like your name 'cause it means cherry blossom which are very pretty flowers." Nakuru said all in one breath once more. Sakura smiled nervously and Tomoyo giggled.
Despite the fact that she and Eriol were sworn enemies, Tomoyo never had a problem liking Nakuru. It was almost impossible to hate Nakuru. She smiled to herself and while she saw Nakuru blabbering off to Sakura, she noticed Eriol waiting for Nakuru to be finished.
Tomoyo would hate to do this, but she had to.
She walked up to Eriol quietly and very hesitantly. "Um... Hiiragizawa..." Tomoyo began and Eriol turned to look at her fidgeting with her hands behind her back and staring at the ground. Eriol stared on, wondering just what she had to say. Then it hit him. Last night came to his mind and he wanted to run. She would probably either yell at him or laugh at him even though he should be the one laughing. But today, he didn't feel like yelling or laughing or fighting with Tomoyo.
"About last night..." Tomoyo began but couldn't get the words right. "It never happened." Eriol said simply, regretting that he said that. Tomoyo nodded slowly, although she wanted to say something else entirely different. But she couldn't say it. It just wasn't her in the situation of her and Eriol. She nodded more firmly this time and walked away from him to find that Nakuru had stopped blabbering.
"Let's go now!" Nakuru announced and started marching towards her school. Sakura, who was a bit in a 'hoe' mood, and Tomoyo followed Nakuru followed by Eriol who was staying behind. Tomoyo started fuming as she thought about what had just happened. 'Bastard. If he doesn't want a thank you, he won't get a thank you.' Tomoyo thought haughtily.
But she also felt sad that he didn't want to talk about last night or anything. He didn't want to be in her life and didn't want her in his. Why was Tomoyo feeling so sad about that?
~*~
'Take a deep breath Fang-Fei. Just breathe.' Fang-Fei thought to herself as she approached Syaoran. She didn't know why she was feeling so nervous. Syaoran loved her. She knew it for sure. But why was she so nervous about asking her -fiancé- for a small teddy bear- a representative of his love for her. She stepped up to Syaoran who was sitting in his desk, staring at nothing in particular.
She took a deep breath. "Syaoran." she said and he turned to Fang-Fei with a grunt. "I-I want a teddy bear!" Fang-Fei blurted out, getting a few people to look at her. She didn't care. She was getting more apprehensive as the seconds passed. "A teddy bear?" Syaoran asked a bit skeptically, an eyebrow raising. "Yeah, a teddy bear!" Fang-Fei repeated, bouncing excitedly. "If you give one to somebody, that's a sign that you love that person!" Fang-Fei said, even more excitedly. Unexpectedly and a little guiltily, Sakura came to Syaoran's mind...
"So, will you?" Fang-Fei asked and Syaoran sighed. "If you say so Fang-Fei." he mumbled and got nearly knocked over by Fang-Fei's force. Fang-Fei was hanging onto Syaoran and jumping up and down. "Syaoran, you're the best!" she cheered and the door opened to find Sakura, Tomoyo, and Eriol about to enter and they came across this little scene.
They were used to it by now well at least Tomoyo and Eriol were. But nonetheless, Tomoyo would feel a strike on her heart when she saw Fang-Fei hanging onto Syaoran. Sakura looked at the scene and felt a little, painful twitch in her chest. Even if it was little, it hurt. Sakura ignored it and the fact that Fang-Fei was hanging all over Syaoran.
Syaoran looked over to see Sakura was a bit withdrawn. He felt his heart ache a little as he watched Sakura in a not-so-cheerful mood. It almost mesmerized him and make him even feel sad. "Syaoran!" Fang-Fei shouted, her hand waving in front of his face. "Huh?" he grunted and found Fang-Fei glaring at him. "You're going to get the bear, right?" she demanded and Syaoran slowly nodded, his mind still on Sakura.
"Home room's starting!" somebody announced in the class and everyone scrambled to their seats. Syaoran sat down and felt Sakura's sad and withdrawn gaze. He didn't know what it was and he didn't know her very well, but he wanted to make her feel better. Badly.
~*~
"Meiling! Stop eating so fast! You'll choke!" Naoko demanded while the other girls just stared at Meiling eating at world record eating speed. "Sorry... I have to... go do something... after I eat." Meiling explained, in-between bites and drinks of tea. After a few more minutes, Meiling's plate and cup were empty and she discarded the trash. "Sorry, gotta go do something!" Meiling said and ran off, leaving the girls staring after her. "What's -that- all about?" Chiharu asked. Nobody knew... except maybe Tomoyo did.
~*~
"Um... Eriol... can I talk to you?" Meiling asked hesitantly and Eriol nodded, a smile lighting his face. Surprisingly, it didn't make her heart flutter as usual. Meiling joined Eriol on the steps of the school. She took a deep breath of fresh autumn air and glanced over at Eriol who had a calm smile on his face. Meiling gulped and began.
"Eriol... I love you...?" Meiling said, the statement ended up more like a question. "I'm not quite so sure you love me Meiling." Eriol said, smiling mischievously. "Then..." Meiling began, trailing off. "I'm sure that person will come to you." Eriol said, taking the whole thing a bit too well as if he had known everything. This did not occur to Meiling, considering she was thinking of something else.
Meiling nodded slowly as dark eyes came to her mind. She shook it off and looked at Eriol "So... are you saying I never really loved you?" Meiling asked, smiling weakly. Eriol nodded with calm eyes but an ominously hidden mischievous touch to them. "I guess you could say it was just a big infatuation." Eriol answered smiling at Meiling.
That made her suspect just a little that Eriol knew all about her love for him. She nodded thoughtfully again. The effects that Touya had on her were stronger than what Eriol ever had on her. Meiling Li was just rejected by the person she had thought she had loved... and it didn't really hurt. She dismissed the thought before she could get a headache. But a thought came to her.
'If this was an infatuation... then what's real love?'
~*~
Step by step. Minute by minute. Syaoran got closer to the craft shop. And the closer he got, the more he doubted telling Fang-Fei he'd get her one. Teddy bears are valuable... they had to be given to the person you love... and Syaoran wasn't so sure he really wanted to give it to someone that he loved as a cousin. Again, emerald eyes came to him. Syaoran shook his head. 'Why is that girl always coming to my mind?' Syaoran thought, annoyed. But he had to admit, those eyes were so innocent... enchanting... beautiful. Syaoran shook his head again. "Damn." he grunted and kept on walking.
As Syaoran was walking, he wasn't looking in front of him. At the same time, a man wasn't looking where he was going either. The two collided. "Oh, I'm sorry." Syaoran apologized and looked up to see a man that reminded him very much of someone. "No, that okay. I apologize." the man insisted and Syaoran nodded. But what he really was thinking about was how he resembled so much of Tomoyo, his best friend with his amethyst eyes and dark gray hair covered his head.
"Okay, good-bye sir." Syaoran said politely and walked off. The man walked the other direction. The thought never crossed Syaoran's mind again the rest of the way.
~*~
"What to choose... what to choose..." Syaoran was trying to choose among the assortment of bear kits with different results. He couldn't find one for Fang-Fei. Then one caught his eyes. He looked at it and, to his horror, realized that it was -her- again. The fur of the bear was honey-brow/auburn and an emerald green ribbon was tied around its neck. It was perfect for her...
Syaoran reached out for it, but suddenly quickly withdrew his hand. 'The bear's not for her you idiot.' he told himself. He barely knew the girl. How the hell would he be in love with her? How to answer that question was impossible for Syaoran to answer.
He busied himself again to find Fang-Fei's bear. He finally found one that -might- suit Fang-Fei... but... Syaoran couldn't do it. He put the box back on the shelf and walked away, wondering to himself what the -heck- he was doing walking away from Fang-Fei's wish.
~End of Chapter
A/N: That was a long chapter! Damn, I didn't know I could write 6000 words in a single chapter. Anyways, I hope that satisfied you all! It's 12:20 right now and I'm damn sleepy. Anyways, I know I added a lot of weird things to this chapter, especially with Sonomi's husband thing. Just felt I needed to add that although it's really weird. I hope the story in the beginning of the chapter made sense... hehe, I know it's weird. I hope you liked it! Am I late? I t doesn't feel that late to me... oh well. Here is the preview for next chapter
*Preview*
-"Okay, Li and Kinomoto and Daidouji and Hiiragizawa, will you do our school the honors of performing in the musical duet contest?" Mr. Terada asked and the four gaped at him in horror. "I guess that's a yes." he assumed while everyone stared at the four who were in too much of a shock to decline his decision.-
-"I'll help you." Touya offered as he watched Meiling struggle with her math homework. "No, that's okay! I'm usually good at math... it's just that these problems are hard." Meiling insisted and Touya smiled at her, making her go weak in the knees. "Well, I'll help you on these." he said and Meiling didn't argue.-
-"So you decided to show up now when Tomoyo is already 11 years old?" Sonomi asked coldly, glaring at her ex-husband/husband.-
-"Hey, it's not like I want to work with you!" Tomoyo shouted angrily at Eriol. He glared back venom. "Don't start with me Daidouji." he warned ominously.-
-"So... do you have any musical talent?" Syaoran asked, trying to work up a conversation. "Well... I can sing..." Sakura trailed off, not sure about her answer. "I'm sure it would sound really nice." Syaoran said automatically then covered his mouth, embarrassed.-
-"You didn't get me one? WHY?!?!" Fang-Fei exploded, shaking Syaoran. "I was going to get you one today. I had plans yesterday." Syaoran lied. Fang-Fei let him go, a frown on her face. "And don't get to close to Kinomoto." she said warned. "WHAT?!?!"-
*End Preview*
Okay, so there were more previews than usual. I felt I needed that much, hehe. Again, I hope you liked this chapter. Please review and go easy on the flames! 'Til next chapter! Ja ne!