MIRROR
Author's Note: In the last chapter Spike has moved out of Buffy's house after failing to convince her that she needs a soul. While going through the nerds' abandoned lair looking for things to hock, he switches on the computer, finds the cameras, and catches Buffy and Xander kissing. Furious, he arrives at Revello Drive and confronts Buffy.
CHAPTER 7- - - - - -
She was apologizing to me, but I didn't really care. She knew that it wasn't enough, so she started explaining.
"It was nothing...it didn't mean anything. We were drinking; both of us were feeling sorry for ourselves. It just…happened."
"But when it happened, you decided to go with it. Use it to hurt me. Make me jealous."
Rapidly blinking, she raised her eyes to mine.
"I had to have you back. I need you."
She flicked her hair back and took a deep breath before continuing.
"I need you," she repeated. "Without you here with me…it's like I'm lost. I can't find my way."
"So I'm what…your moral compass, your center?" I gave a harsh laugh. "Hate to break this to you, but evil undead here."
"And I hate to break it to you, Spike, but so am I. Evil. Undead."
For moment, she turned her back on me, her emotions high, then spun back around, pushing her face close to mine.
"Don't you get it yet, Spike? We belong together. A matched set. Look carefully at me and you know what you'll see? You. Your reflection. Your mirror.
I backed away a few steps until I was up against the wall, but she followed. I shook my head in denial.
"No…not true. I'm a vampire. You're the bloody Chosen One."
"It is true. And I need you with me."
"What you need is your soul back."
At the mention of her soul, she furiously pressed me into the wall. Then her expression shifted, her hands starting to rub up and down my shirt.
"I thought you liked me like this."
Her small fingers began to nimbly unbutton my shirt, caressing the flesh they revealed, and I took a deep, unnecessary breath. She leaned forward, and her mouth skimmed over my cheek to hover next to my ear.
"Souled Buffy wouldn't give you the time of day. She'd never touch you like I touch you. She'd never kiss you like I kiss you."
Those hands moved lower and rubbed against my rapidly growing bulge, before starting to work on my belt. Her warm breath tickled my ear as she whispered to me.
"And souled Buffy would never let you fuck her. You're beneath her. But you and me…we're on the same level."
Gathering all my inner strength, I gripped her arms and pushed her away.
"But it's souled Buffy that I want."
At first, she just stood there, shocked. As the seconds ticked by, I watched her face fill with anger before she punched me hard in the face. Once. Twice. When I managed to block her third swing, she grabbed me, and brutally threw me against the sink. My head hit the mirror behind it and it shattered, raining shards of glass around me, dazing me a bit.
She reached out and knocked me to the ground, then straddled me.
"Oh, you want me. I know you want me."
She was so damn strong. Had known she was stronger than I was when she'd picked up that sodding troll hammer and started to swing it around, when I could barely move it. Now, I struggled against that strength.
"The problem is, you've been going around pretending to be a man. Pretending to be in love. Trying to do the right thing."
She put her hands on my exposed chest and dug her nails in, then raked them down, and blood welled in the red furrows she carved into my flesh. I hissed in pain and arousal, and she leaned in closer, her voice cutting into me.
"But you're not a man; you're a monster. And this isn't love. It was never love."
Desperately trying to deny it, I pushed up in an effort to knock her off, but she simply laughed and ground herself against me.
"Remember telling me about killing your first Slayer? About how her blood was an aphrodisiac…how you and Dru got off on it?
She reached over for a broken piece of the mirror and swiftly slashed the fleshy part of her palm below her thumb. As the blood started to flow, she pressed her hand against my mouth.
"You're a demon, Spike. A monster. That's all you'll ever be. And that's what I want. So, why don't we let the real you come out and play?"
I could feel her warm blood in my mouth, and I tried not to drink. Didn't want her to be soulless and eternally damned, like I was. Frantically, I tried to spit it out. She lifted my head and slammed it back to the tiled floor.
"Swallow, damn you."
That life-giving substance trickled down my throat, and I could feel my face begin to shift. Knew I'd failed then. Knew after this, I'd never be strong enough to leave her again.
"Buffy, stop! You're hurting him!"
Dimly, I heard the Niblet. I felt Buffy's grip loosen as she lifted some of her weight off me; then, there was a sound of a thud and a cry. With a roar, I shifted fully into game face, took advantage of the Slayer's distraction, and threw her off of me.
Dawn was lying in a heap, next to the tub, moaning. When she'd tried to protect me, Buffy had lashed out and sent her flying across the room. I rushed to her side, kneeling down to examine her. Buffy lay sprawled near the sink, her face beginning to register what she'd done.
Grabbing my duster off the tub, I wrapped it around Dawn, and gently gathered her into my arms. Still on the floor, Buffy began to stammer excuses, but I ignored them as I started to carry her little sis from the room. Then, in a voice full of pleading, the Slayer questioned me.
"What are you going to do with her?"
With my game face gone, I turned and looked at Buffy, still on the floor, the horror of what she'd done reflected on her face.
"Supposed to protect her…'til the end of the world."
Then, with a sneer, I added my next words.
"Made a promise to a lady."
tbc