Note to Jen if she's reading this: I feel better than John Brown. I feel
better now. O.o everyone else, ignore that.
Disclaimer: IT'S MINE IT'S ALL MINE AHAHAHAHA *gets K.O.ed* Okay, okay, bow to Tolkien and Colfer everyone. -_-
Chapter Four: The Cousins Denver, Colorado, U.S.A:
Artemis awoke in a low-ceilinged room, covers strewn about his feet. Slowly, he sat up, trying to remember why he wasn't in his own bed in Fowl Manor. Memory came streaking back, making him slump back onto his pillow; how he and Holly had bought tickets to the ocean liner, and from the shores of New Jersey taken a plane to Denver and bribed the clerk to let them stay at the hotel with a good three hundred dollars.
The bedroom door was closed; Holly must have slept on the couch, for the other bed was undisturbed. Pulling on a fleecy beige bathrobe, he stalked out.
A soft snore told him his companion had not yet risen. Holly was splayed on the couch, breathing lightly and gripping her buzz baton even in her sleep.
Artemis shook his head and returned to his room, turning on his laptop. He paged through his web site, noting with satisfaction that the plans he had so painstakingly written had not accidentally downloaded.
A few moments later, Holly appeared in the doorway, blinking tired hazel eyes. She came to watch as he typed in a small sentence:
Current success.
Examining the stitching on her kiddie overalls, the captain asked casually, "Are you going to get dressed and come have breakfast, or do I have to drag you downstairs in that bathrobe?"
The mastermind allowed himself a rare grin. "Be careful. You're supposed to be my little sister, and if people see you bossing me around, they'll be worried."
"Little sister indeed." Holly snorted and put her face up close to his, eyes narrowed to slits. "I'm six times older than you, Mud Boy. I don't care how you disguise it, I'm the one who's going to be bossing you around, and don't you forget it either. Do you want breakfast or not?"
Artemis silenced her by jamming a floppy rainbow hat down over her eyes. She sputtered and pushed it up over her brows, causing the smash-pink tassel to flop down over her right eye. "I have to wear this?"
"If you don't want to waste your magic shielding, then you ought to play the part of a little girl as thoroughly as you can," the teen said firmly, hiding a smile at the sight of the captain dressed as an extremely colorful child. "And that includes costume."
She grumbled to herself and flipped the tassel to the back of her head. "Foaly would laugh himself sick if he could see me now."
The mastermind snatched a few garments from his suitcase, ducking inside the bathroom to get dressed. He reappeared a moment later in a storm-gray blazer, white bow tie, and stiff jeans.
Holly struggled to stop laughing. "Artemis, surely you're not going out in that?"
He glared at her. "Americans wear jeans. I'll fit right in."
"I know they wear jeans. It's the bow tie that gives you away. How many teenagers do you know exactly that go around on weekdays with ties?"
Artemis was losing his patience. "Holly, of the two of us, remind me again which lives above ground?"
The captain sighed. "Fine. Pretend you don't know me when we go down to breakfast, okay? And if anybody gives you odd looks, well, don't say I didn't warn you."
The teen fumed. "Are you ready?"
For an answer, the elf skipped out the door. Her companion sighed and followed her, though he did not take off the bow tie.
Fowl Manor: Butler was in a panic. Artemis's bed was not slept in, and a thorough search of the grounds proved the teen to be gone. Even his laptop was missing, and it was protected so as to be untraceable.
He finally informed Artemis Senior. Not the best idea. The man was not resourceful when in a panic, and was currently driving around bellowing for his son.
It was turning out to be quite a day.
Artemis smiled triumphantly at Holly as they left the hotel restaurant. "You see? Not a single person gave me 'odd looks'."
The captain was still chewing on a rind of honeydew. She took a last nibble and tossed it into a trashcan. "You obviously weren't watching the waitresses, or the large family, or the group of tattooed men in the corner, or the thin wiry women with the toddler. Which was nearly everyone in the room. Did I mention the twin college students were staring at you too?"
The teen deftly changed the subject, peering out their hotel room window to the large building across the street. "D'you want to go to the mall?" he asked lamely.
Holly sighed. "Are you going to take off that bow tie?"
"No."
"Oh, fine. What else is there to do above ground?"
Artemis fished for an answer, but stopped as he realized it was a rhetorical question. The captain was already halfway out the door.
They crossed the street together, nearly being run over by a Pepsi truck in the process; other than that, they entered the mall without great incident.
A few minutes later, they took a seat on an iron-framed bench. Holly fingered the trunk of a fake potted tree next to them, watching a three- dimensional ad for cigarettes. Her eyes traveled up to the crystalline elevator, down to a store that seemed to feature low-necked autumn sweaters, and across a jewelry store. She looked horrified. "What have you done to the surface?"
Artemis tried to dissuade her, but she was already up and running toward the nearest couple.
"Shame on you, I thought you'd just polluted the earth, I didn't realize you had turned it into a - a -"
The teen charged after her, clamping firm hands onto her shoulders. He looked apologetically at the bewildered people. "I'm terribly sorry, just my little sister, sort of, you know, hurt in the head -"
He shooed them away and thrust Holly back onto the bench. "Don't DO that," he said through gritted teeth. "You can't go around telling everyone they're evil, you'll be arrested or something and then everyone will find out you're an elf - you're acting like an imbecile. Cut it out!"
Holly nodded weakly. She stood up and led the way through the shops, taking in everything, the candy and food counters, the pet shops, the toy stores.
Finally, they reached the last doorway (a very busy Target). Artemis took a seat in the movie aisle, watching two girls who were giggling over a film copy of The Return of the King.
" '...began with the forging of the great rings...'"
"Frodo is so cute!"
"Gandalf was awesome... I seriously cried in the first movie when he died..." " '...so, Gandalf Grayhame thinks he's found the Lost King of Gondor... it matters not, the world of men will fall...'"
"Christopher Lee played Saruman so well... anybody else would've bungled it..." "No kidding... Pippin was really sweet, though... 'mushrooms!'"
The shorter one gradually became aware that they were being watched. She dug her elbow into the other's side, and they looked back at Artemis together before resuming their whispering.
"Who's he?"
"The little girl's cute..."
"He looks about your height, Jen..."
"Why do you think he's wearing a bow tie?"
"A bow tie? On a weekday?"
Holly smirked at the crimson mastermind from where she was examining a copy of Shrek.
"What's your name?" Jen inquired of the elf. "You look like you're maybe, what, seven?"
Artemis choked.
"My name is Holly," said the captain, glaring up at the teenage girl before remembering that she was pretending to be little. "And yes, I'm seven. This is my... brother -" she made a face and waved her hand vaguely at the boy.
"I'm Jennifer, and this is my cousin Tessa," the girl went on cheerfully.
"I'm fourteen, and she's fifteen," Tessa put in. "We're cousins."
"Our moms told us not to tell anyone our names while we're at the mall," Jennie remarked, looking up at the mastermind. "But you're my age, right? and nobody I know at fifteen would abduct someone." - Holly snorted loudly at this point, but the cousins ignored it - "Aren't you from my science class?"
Mutely, he shook his head, and examined the girls with an expression close to bewilderment.
Jennifer had brown-gold hair, light and sleek; in contrast, her cousin had a head of thick brown hair, with a tinge of auburn in the light. Both had storm-blue eyes, though Tessa's had a ring of gold around the pupil, and both were wearing tye-dyed blue shirts.
The younger one sat cross-legged on the floor, watching the captain. She leaned forward, remarking, "You know, for brothers and sisters, you don't look anything alike -"
She froze.
"Her ears," she whispered, and dove for her copy of The Return of the King.
Holly's eyes went wide with fright and she shielded hurriedly. Jennie sprang after Tessa and they stared at the movie together, referencing with a picture that Artemis could not see.
"She has to be one -"
"Not exactly your standard Legolas though..."
Tessa put aside the movie and stared at Artemis. "That was an elf."
"Explain yourselves," said Jennie.
LOL cough. REVIEW!
Disclaimer: IT'S MINE IT'S ALL MINE AHAHAHAHA *gets K.O.ed* Okay, okay, bow to Tolkien and Colfer everyone. -_-
Chapter Four: The Cousins Denver, Colorado, U.S.A:
Artemis awoke in a low-ceilinged room, covers strewn about his feet. Slowly, he sat up, trying to remember why he wasn't in his own bed in Fowl Manor. Memory came streaking back, making him slump back onto his pillow; how he and Holly had bought tickets to the ocean liner, and from the shores of New Jersey taken a plane to Denver and bribed the clerk to let them stay at the hotel with a good three hundred dollars.
The bedroom door was closed; Holly must have slept on the couch, for the other bed was undisturbed. Pulling on a fleecy beige bathrobe, he stalked out.
A soft snore told him his companion had not yet risen. Holly was splayed on the couch, breathing lightly and gripping her buzz baton even in her sleep.
Artemis shook his head and returned to his room, turning on his laptop. He paged through his web site, noting with satisfaction that the plans he had so painstakingly written had not accidentally downloaded.
A few moments later, Holly appeared in the doorway, blinking tired hazel eyes. She came to watch as he typed in a small sentence:
Current success.
Examining the stitching on her kiddie overalls, the captain asked casually, "Are you going to get dressed and come have breakfast, or do I have to drag you downstairs in that bathrobe?"
The mastermind allowed himself a rare grin. "Be careful. You're supposed to be my little sister, and if people see you bossing me around, they'll be worried."
"Little sister indeed." Holly snorted and put her face up close to his, eyes narrowed to slits. "I'm six times older than you, Mud Boy. I don't care how you disguise it, I'm the one who's going to be bossing you around, and don't you forget it either. Do you want breakfast or not?"
Artemis silenced her by jamming a floppy rainbow hat down over her eyes. She sputtered and pushed it up over her brows, causing the smash-pink tassel to flop down over her right eye. "I have to wear this?"
"If you don't want to waste your magic shielding, then you ought to play the part of a little girl as thoroughly as you can," the teen said firmly, hiding a smile at the sight of the captain dressed as an extremely colorful child. "And that includes costume."
She grumbled to herself and flipped the tassel to the back of her head. "Foaly would laugh himself sick if he could see me now."
The mastermind snatched a few garments from his suitcase, ducking inside the bathroom to get dressed. He reappeared a moment later in a storm-gray blazer, white bow tie, and stiff jeans.
Holly struggled to stop laughing. "Artemis, surely you're not going out in that?"
He glared at her. "Americans wear jeans. I'll fit right in."
"I know they wear jeans. It's the bow tie that gives you away. How many teenagers do you know exactly that go around on weekdays with ties?"
Artemis was losing his patience. "Holly, of the two of us, remind me again which lives above ground?"
The captain sighed. "Fine. Pretend you don't know me when we go down to breakfast, okay? And if anybody gives you odd looks, well, don't say I didn't warn you."
The teen fumed. "Are you ready?"
For an answer, the elf skipped out the door. Her companion sighed and followed her, though he did not take off the bow tie.
Fowl Manor: Butler was in a panic. Artemis's bed was not slept in, and a thorough search of the grounds proved the teen to be gone. Even his laptop was missing, and it was protected so as to be untraceable.
He finally informed Artemis Senior. Not the best idea. The man was not resourceful when in a panic, and was currently driving around bellowing for his son.
It was turning out to be quite a day.
Artemis smiled triumphantly at Holly as they left the hotel restaurant. "You see? Not a single person gave me 'odd looks'."
The captain was still chewing on a rind of honeydew. She took a last nibble and tossed it into a trashcan. "You obviously weren't watching the waitresses, or the large family, or the group of tattooed men in the corner, or the thin wiry women with the toddler. Which was nearly everyone in the room. Did I mention the twin college students were staring at you too?"
The teen deftly changed the subject, peering out their hotel room window to the large building across the street. "D'you want to go to the mall?" he asked lamely.
Holly sighed. "Are you going to take off that bow tie?"
"No."
"Oh, fine. What else is there to do above ground?"
Artemis fished for an answer, but stopped as he realized it was a rhetorical question. The captain was already halfway out the door.
They crossed the street together, nearly being run over by a Pepsi truck in the process; other than that, they entered the mall without great incident.
A few minutes later, they took a seat on an iron-framed bench. Holly fingered the trunk of a fake potted tree next to them, watching a three- dimensional ad for cigarettes. Her eyes traveled up to the crystalline elevator, down to a store that seemed to feature low-necked autumn sweaters, and across a jewelry store. She looked horrified. "What have you done to the surface?"
Artemis tried to dissuade her, but she was already up and running toward the nearest couple.
"Shame on you, I thought you'd just polluted the earth, I didn't realize you had turned it into a - a -"
The teen charged after her, clamping firm hands onto her shoulders. He looked apologetically at the bewildered people. "I'm terribly sorry, just my little sister, sort of, you know, hurt in the head -"
He shooed them away and thrust Holly back onto the bench. "Don't DO that," he said through gritted teeth. "You can't go around telling everyone they're evil, you'll be arrested or something and then everyone will find out you're an elf - you're acting like an imbecile. Cut it out!"
Holly nodded weakly. She stood up and led the way through the shops, taking in everything, the candy and food counters, the pet shops, the toy stores.
Finally, they reached the last doorway (a very busy Target). Artemis took a seat in the movie aisle, watching two girls who were giggling over a film copy of The Return of the King.
" '...began with the forging of the great rings...'"
"Frodo is so cute!"
"Gandalf was awesome... I seriously cried in the first movie when he died..." " '...so, Gandalf Grayhame thinks he's found the Lost King of Gondor... it matters not, the world of men will fall...'"
"Christopher Lee played Saruman so well... anybody else would've bungled it..." "No kidding... Pippin was really sweet, though... 'mushrooms!'"
The shorter one gradually became aware that they were being watched. She dug her elbow into the other's side, and they looked back at Artemis together before resuming their whispering.
"Who's he?"
"The little girl's cute..."
"He looks about your height, Jen..."
"Why do you think he's wearing a bow tie?"
"A bow tie? On a weekday?"
Holly smirked at the crimson mastermind from where she was examining a copy of Shrek.
"What's your name?" Jen inquired of the elf. "You look like you're maybe, what, seven?"
Artemis choked.
"My name is Holly," said the captain, glaring up at the teenage girl before remembering that she was pretending to be little. "And yes, I'm seven. This is my... brother -" she made a face and waved her hand vaguely at the boy.
"I'm Jennifer, and this is my cousin Tessa," the girl went on cheerfully.
"I'm fourteen, and she's fifteen," Tessa put in. "We're cousins."
"Our moms told us not to tell anyone our names while we're at the mall," Jennie remarked, looking up at the mastermind. "But you're my age, right? and nobody I know at fifteen would abduct someone." - Holly snorted loudly at this point, but the cousins ignored it - "Aren't you from my science class?"
Mutely, he shook his head, and examined the girls with an expression close to bewilderment.
Jennifer had brown-gold hair, light and sleek; in contrast, her cousin had a head of thick brown hair, with a tinge of auburn in the light. Both had storm-blue eyes, though Tessa's had a ring of gold around the pupil, and both were wearing tye-dyed blue shirts.
The younger one sat cross-legged on the floor, watching the captain. She leaned forward, remarking, "You know, for brothers and sisters, you don't look anything alike -"
She froze.
"Her ears," she whispered, and dove for her copy of The Return of the King.
Holly's eyes went wide with fright and she shielded hurriedly. Jennie sprang after Tessa and they stared at the movie together, referencing with a picture that Artemis could not see.
"She has to be one -"
"Not exactly your standard Legolas though..."
Tessa put aside the movie and stared at Artemis. "That was an elf."
"Explain yourselves," said Jennie.
LOL cough. REVIEW!