Simon's Choice
Chapter 6/??
A 7th Heaven Fan Fic by Lucky Star
Chapter 6: The Colonel
The Colonel and Grandma Ruth flew in from Buffalo the Sunday before Dad's surgery. Lucy and Ruthie went to pick them up after church, and I was glad I had to work so I couldn't go with them.
I had requested an all-day shift to try to make up a few hours I would miss because of the surgery. Mom wanted everyone to be with her at the hospital while she waited.
My only regret was that I wouldn't see how the Colonel and Grandma reacted to meeting their great grand daughter. But, maybe that was a blessing. The Colonel could drone on about anything, especially something like safe sex and premarital sex and his disappointment in me.
With a little luck, the Colonel would fall so in love with Mykaela that he would forget all about lecturing me. Maybe meeting her would soften his old, bitter, lonely heart.
Part of me wanted to tell him the truth. I didn't want them-The Colonel, my parents, my siblings, my pseudo siblings, or anyone-thinking I had done something so foolish. I had earned the nick name "Virgin Camden" even though I hated it. I was proud of it, proud to be a virgin.
I just can't lose Mykaela, and telling them the truth would be the end of that. They would know Mykaela wasn't my daughter and I would have no legal claim to her.
Kevin offered to use his influence as a cop to help me get a birth certificate without Claire's signature. I had no idea what he meant to do, or how to go about it, but I trusted Kevin to take care of the details.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
I never expected them to come to Pete's Pizza for dinner. Pizza with a side of grease was the last thing Dad needed to eat the night before his double bypass surgery, and I couldn't remember ever seeing the Colonel eat pizza.
I probably should have known they would come anyway.
They needed three tables pushed together to accommodate all of them. Grandma and the Colonel, Mom and Dad, Lucy and Kevin, Ruthie and the twins, Robbie, Ben, and Mykaela in her infant seat. The best part about it was seeing Mykaela when I didn't expect to see her for several hours.
I waited until they were settled before I went to the table. I went to Mykaela first and tickled her leg. Her eyes seemed to light up seeing me, as if she recognized me. I smiled and kissed her cheek before straightening up to greet my grand parents.
The Colonel wore his face of indifference, and I knew he couldn't wait to get me alone for the lecture of the century. Maybe I would just tell him I don't want to hear it. Not with Dad about to go in for surgery. And, what's it to him anyway? Mykaela is my daughter and I'm not asking for his help at all. I would love to look him in the eye and tell him he has no right to lecture me anyway.
"Hello, Simon," He said and offered his hand. I took it. His grip nearly crushed my fingers. "It seems congratulations are in order."
"Yes sir," I answered without missing a beat.
"She's a fine girl."
"I'm glad you think so, sir." I held his gaze. I just knew he had to be keeping his cool because of the public setting. Once I was home, and on one could see or hear, he would go off on me. I could see the ache of disappointment in his eyes.
Grandma Ruth put her hand on my arm, and the Colonel let go of my hand so I could lean down to kiss Grandma. "She is beautiful, Simon."
"Thank you." I smiled. I knew she meant those words, but she had a cloud of disappointment in her eyes too.
They would just have to understand I made a choice and I'm willing to accept the consequences of it, even if that meant a thousand lectures.
I took the order and sent it back to the kitchen. At first I avoided the table as much as I could because I felt like I was under a microscope, but then I decided not to let their ignorance get to me. After that, I stopped by the table to see Mykaela as often as I could.
Pete tried to get me to go home with them, but I refused. I need the money. I didn't tell Pete I just didn't want to go home with them, with the Colonel and his lecture.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
He was waiting for me when I got home. I sighed and hung my coat then joined him at the kitchen table because I would rather face him there than in my bedroom, and I knew he would follow me if I went upstairs.
"You've grown quite a bit since the last time I saw you."
I nodded and dug at the dirt under my fingernails. No. I decided at the restaurant that I would not let him intimidate me. I looked up and met his eyes. "Yes sir. I have."
"You're a man now, Simon."
I knew then he was not going to make this easy. I wish I could think of something clever to say to show him I wouldn't take his crap. I know he means well, but sometimes...many times I have wanted to tell him to butt out.
"Your father tells me the child's mother is gone?"
"Yes. She told me her father would kill her if he found out she was pregnant. So I helped her. I delivered Mykaela in a phone booth. I tried to convince Claire to come home with me, and I told her my parents would help her any way they could. She was too scared. I tried to call her, but her mother said she isn't home. She wouldn't tell me where she is."
"I see."
"Do you? Mykaela is my daughter, Colonel, and I love her. I'm going to raise her and take care of her. I don't need you or anyone else to lecture me about it."
I think I saw the hint of a tear in his eyes. "I'm not going to lecture you, Simon." I almost laughed out loud. He took a deep breath and continued. "I wanted to commend you for what you're doing. But don't think for a moment that I believe that child is yours."
"What do you mean?"
He stared at me, his gaze solid, unflinching. "You're a good man, Simon. What you are doing, most men would not do. I am proud to say you are my grand son, even though it will take some time getting used to being a great grand father."
"Thank you, sir. I think." Honestly, I wasn't sure what to think. The Colonel seemed to be complimenting me and congratulating me when I thought he would be reading me the riot act.
"She's not really your child, is she, Simon?"
I wanted to tell him the truth. I really did. But I couldn't risk it. I couldn't risk losing Mykaela. "Yes, sir. She is."
"Then tell me how it happened."
"It?" I blinked at him. What would I say? What could I say?
He nodded. He looked so old. I never noticed that before. "How did it happen that you got this missing mother pregnant?"
"I...I..."
"That's what I thought. Simon..."
I shook my head. I wanted to cry. I wanted to crawl under a rock and hide. "She is my daughter, Colonel."
"Simon, you can't do this."
"Yes I can. I am doing it."
The Colonel shook his head. The lines around his eyes seemed deeper, the shadows darker. "There are other ways."
"Other ways?"
"Your parents could adopt her."
"No! She's my daughter! I don't want her to be my sister." How could he even suggest that? Because he doesn't know. He doesn't know how I felt when I brought her into this world. He doesn't understand how her cry touched my heart. He doesn't understand, he can't understand.
"Simon, be reasonable."
"I am! I am being reasonable! You're the one who isn't being reasonable!" And I was the one who was yelling. I clenched my fists ad hoped to channel my frustration there so I could calm my voice.
"You are so young, Simon. I don't want to see you sacrifice your youth."
"It's my choice, Colonel." I looked his dead-on, straight in the face. "I have my parent's blessing, and quite frankly that's all I need. I don't need your support and I certainly don't need your approval. Mykaela is my daughter, and that's the end of it. Good night, Grand Father."
I stood and turned and walked up the stairs to my room. I would not let an old man bully me into giving up my daughter, Grand Father, Colonel, or anything else.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
End chapter six. The story flows so much easier in a first person narrative. What do you think of the story now? Please R/R so I know! Thanks! Lucky Star (JjsLuckyStar@aol.com)
Chapter 6/??
A 7th Heaven Fan Fic by Lucky Star
Chapter 6: The Colonel
The Colonel and Grandma Ruth flew in from Buffalo the Sunday before Dad's surgery. Lucy and Ruthie went to pick them up after church, and I was glad I had to work so I couldn't go with them.
I had requested an all-day shift to try to make up a few hours I would miss because of the surgery. Mom wanted everyone to be with her at the hospital while she waited.
My only regret was that I wouldn't see how the Colonel and Grandma reacted to meeting their great grand daughter. But, maybe that was a blessing. The Colonel could drone on about anything, especially something like safe sex and premarital sex and his disappointment in me.
With a little luck, the Colonel would fall so in love with Mykaela that he would forget all about lecturing me. Maybe meeting her would soften his old, bitter, lonely heart.
Part of me wanted to tell him the truth. I didn't want them-The Colonel, my parents, my siblings, my pseudo siblings, or anyone-thinking I had done something so foolish. I had earned the nick name "Virgin Camden" even though I hated it. I was proud of it, proud to be a virgin.
I just can't lose Mykaela, and telling them the truth would be the end of that. They would know Mykaela wasn't my daughter and I would have no legal claim to her.
Kevin offered to use his influence as a cop to help me get a birth certificate without Claire's signature. I had no idea what he meant to do, or how to go about it, but I trusted Kevin to take care of the details.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
I never expected them to come to Pete's Pizza for dinner. Pizza with a side of grease was the last thing Dad needed to eat the night before his double bypass surgery, and I couldn't remember ever seeing the Colonel eat pizza.
I probably should have known they would come anyway.
They needed three tables pushed together to accommodate all of them. Grandma and the Colonel, Mom and Dad, Lucy and Kevin, Ruthie and the twins, Robbie, Ben, and Mykaela in her infant seat. The best part about it was seeing Mykaela when I didn't expect to see her for several hours.
I waited until they were settled before I went to the table. I went to Mykaela first and tickled her leg. Her eyes seemed to light up seeing me, as if she recognized me. I smiled and kissed her cheek before straightening up to greet my grand parents.
The Colonel wore his face of indifference, and I knew he couldn't wait to get me alone for the lecture of the century. Maybe I would just tell him I don't want to hear it. Not with Dad about to go in for surgery. And, what's it to him anyway? Mykaela is my daughter and I'm not asking for his help at all. I would love to look him in the eye and tell him he has no right to lecture me anyway.
"Hello, Simon," He said and offered his hand. I took it. His grip nearly crushed my fingers. "It seems congratulations are in order."
"Yes sir," I answered without missing a beat.
"She's a fine girl."
"I'm glad you think so, sir." I held his gaze. I just knew he had to be keeping his cool because of the public setting. Once I was home, and on one could see or hear, he would go off on me. I could see the ache of disappointment in his eyes.
Grandma Ruth put her hand on my arm, and the Colonel let go of my hand so I could lean down to kiss Grandma. "She is beautiful, Simon."
"Thank you." I smiled. I knew she meant those words, but she had a cloud of disappointment in her eyes too.
They would just have to understand I made a choice and I'm willing to accept the consequences of it, even if that meant a thousand lectures.
I took the order and sent it back to the kitchen. At first I avoided the table as much as I could because I felt like I was under a microscope, but then I decided not to let their ignorance get to me. After that, I stopped by the table to see Mykaela as often as I could.
Pete tried to get me to go home with them, but I refused. I need the money. I didn't tell Pete I just didn't want to go home with them, with the Colonel and his lecture.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
He was waiting for me when I got home. I sighed and hung my coat then joined him at the kitchen table because I would rather face him there than in my bedroom, and I knew he would follow me if I went upstairs.
"You've grown quite a bit since the last time I saw you."
I nodded and dug at the dirt under my fingernails. No. I decided at the restaurant that I would not let him intimidate me. I looked up and met his eyes. "Yes sir. I have."
"You're a man now, Simon."
I knew then he was not going to make this easy. I wish I could think of something clever to say to show him I wouldn't take his crap. I know he means well, but sometimes...many times I have wanted to tell him to butt out.
"Your father tells me the child's mother is gone?"
"Yes. She told me her father would kill her if he found out she was pregnant. So I helped her. I delivered Mykaela in a phone booth. I tried to convince Claire to come home with me, and I told her my parents would help her any way they could. She was too scared. I tried to call her, but her mother said she isn't home. She wouldn't tell me where she is."
"I see."
"Do you? Mykaela is my daughter, Colonel, and I love her. I'm going to raise her and take care of her. I don't need you or anyone else to lecture me about it."
I think I saw the hint of a tear in his eyes. "I'm not going to lecture you, Simon." I almost laughed out loud. He took a deep breath and continued. "I wanted to commend you for what you're doing. But don't think for a moment that I believe that child is yours."
"What do you mean?"
He stared at me, his gaze solid, unflinching. "You're a good man, Simon. What you are doing, most men would not do. I am proud to say you are my grand son, even though it will take some time getting used to being a great grand father."
"Thank you, sir. I think." Honestly, I wasn't sure what to think. The Colonel seemed to be complimenting me and congratulating me when I thought he would be reading me the riot act.
"She's not really your child, is she, Simon?"
I wanted to tell him the truth. I really did. But I couldn't risk it. I couldn't risk losing Mykaela. "Yes, sir. She is."
"Then tell me how it happened."
"It?" I blinked at him. What would I say? What could I say?
He nodded. He looked so old. I never noticed that before. "How did it happen that you got this missing mother pregnant?"
"I...I..."
"That's what I thought. Simon..."
I shook my head. I wanted to cry. I wanted to crawl under a rock and hide. "She is my daughter, Colonel."
"Simon, you can't do this."
"Yes I can. I am doing it."
The Colonel shook his head. The lines around his eyes seemed deeper, the shadows darker. "There are other ways."
"Other ways?"
"Your parents could adopt her."
"No! She's my daughter! I don't want her to be my sister." How could he even suggest that? Because he doesn't know. He doesn't know how I felt when I brought her into this world. He doesn't understand how her cry touched my heart. He doesn't understand, he can't understand.
"Simon, be reasonable."
"I am! I am being reasonable! You're the one who isn't being reasonable!" And I was the one who was yelling. I clenched my fists ad hoped to channel my frustration there so I could calm my voice.
"You are so young, Simon. I don't want to see you sacrifice your youth."
"It's my choice, Colonel." I looked his dead-on, straight in the face. "I have my parent's blessing, and quite frankly that's all I need. I don't need your support and I certainly don't need your approval. Mykaela is my daughter, and that's the end of it. Good night, Grand Father."
I stood and turned and walked up the stairs to my room. I would not let an old man bully me into giving up my daughter, Grand Father, Colonel, or anything else.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
End chapter six. The story flows so much easier in a first person narrative. What do you think of the story now? Please R/R so I know! Thanks! Lucky Star (JjsLuckyStar@aol.com)