Simon's Choice
Chapter 9/?
A 7th Heaven Fan Fic by Lucky Star
Chapter 9:
The nurses wouldn't let me take Mykaela back to see Dad, something about babies in ICU being against hospital policy. I almost refused to go then, but I gave in because I knew it was important to Mom that we all see Dad. No one said it out loud, but we all knew seeing him now might be the last time.
Mom stayed with him, the rest of us were allowed one at a time. Lucy went first, then me. I left Mykaela with The Colonel and Grandma Ruth.
Lucy came out of Dad's room in tears. I wanted to ask her how bad it was in there, but she hurried past me and into Kevin's arms before I had a chance.
I took a deep breath and went in. The smell assaulted my nose and made me feel like throwing up. The whole hospital smelled sterile, but inside the room, the smell of bleach mixed with urine and I don't know what else.
The room was small, barely big enough for the bed and all the machines. I took baby steps to the side of the bed, stopping about halfway. Mom sat on the other side, holding his hand.
He didn't even look like my father. He didn't really even look human. His skin was real pale and pastey, his hair matted away from his head. They had tubes stuck in his nose and taped to his mouth.
I wanted to turn around and walk right out of that room. I didn't want to touch him or talk to him. He probably couldn't hear me anyway. I could barely hear myself think over the beeps and hums of the machines they had him hooked up to.
His hand felt rubbery. Like a fake hand. I only touched it because of Mom. I didn't want her to know how scared and upset I was.
"Hey, Dad. It's me, Simon. I'm here. I just wanted to let you know I'm here and Mykaela is here, but I had to leave her with The Colonel and Grandma Ruth because the nurses wouldn't let me bring her in to see you." I felt like once I stopped talking, I would start crying, so I wanted to keep talking until my three minutes was up, but my words dissolved into tears when Mom reached out and put her hand over mine where I held Dad's.
I looked at her, and I knew I couldn't stay in that room another second. I jerked my hand away from her and stumbled backward. I crashed into the wall, but I used the hard surface to propel me forward and out the door.
I couldn't see where I was going, and I didn't care. I only knew I had to get out of there, out of the hospital, away from the pain and the sickness and the fear. I just kept going, taking the stairs instead of the elevator so I could keep moving. I had to keep moving.
I didn't stop until I got outside. Even then I didn't want to stop, but my legs felt weak and I didn't want to fall on my face. So close to the hospital, someone would no doubt rush me back inside to see a doctor.
My bench was empty, so I sat down there. And I realized I had left Mykaela in the waiting room. Panic filled me, wild, crazy eyes panic. I knew I wasn't thinking straight, but I couldn't help it. My father was dying and I just left my baby upstairs.
I tried to run back inside, but slammed into someone as soon as I moved forward, and the impact made me fall on my butt. I just covered my face with my hands and cried right there on the ground. I didn't care who saw me, or what they thought of me sitting there crying like a baby.
The person I ran into knelt in front of me and reached out to touch my shoulder. I yelped, a sound inhuman even to my own ears, and tried to move away.
"Simon, Simon, relax, man. It's okay. It's only me."
I didn't care who it was. I just wanted to get away. I wanted Mykaela so I could run away from here and never look back. I don't know where I would go, but anywhere, somewhere far far from Glen Oak.
I scrambled to my feet, and the person caught my shirt and pulled me back, and the person wrapped his arms around me to keep me from running. I struggled against the hold, fought with all my strength, but I couldn't break away. After a minute I collapsed against the person, with no more will to fight left inside of me.
"Shhh, shhhh. I've got you. I've got you."
I looked up to see who it was, because my mind couldn't identify the voice. Matt? I blinked, wiped at my eyes. But Matt couldn't get away from school. Matt was still in New York...
"Matt?"
"I made it. I couldn't stay in New York. I talked to my professors again, and they agreed to let me have a week's personal leave."
I fell against him, crying again.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Okay, so I still haven't decided if I want to kill Eric off or not, so any reader's thoughts on that issue would be greatly appreciated. Tell me in review or personal email. You guys are the best. Thanks! Lucky Star (JjsLuckyStar@aol.com)
Chapter 9/?
A 7th Heaven Fan Fic by Lucky Star
Chapter 9:
The nurses wouldn't let me take Mykaela back to see Dad, something about babies in ICU being against hospital policy. I almost refused to go then, but I gave in because I knew it was important to Mom that we all see Dad. No one said it out loud, but we all knew seeing him now might be the last time.
Mom stayed with him, the rest of us were allowed one at a time. Lucy went first, then me. I left Mykaela with The Colonel and Grandma Ruth.
Lucy came out of Dad's room in tears. I wanted to ask her how bad it was in there, but she hurried past me and into Kevin's arms before I had a chance.
I took a deep breath and went in. The smell assaulted my nose and made me feel like throwing up. The whole hospital smelled sterile, but inside the room, the smell of bleach mixed with urine and I don't know what else.
The room was small, barely big enough for the bed and all the machines. I took baby steps to the side of the bed, stopping about halfway. Mom sat on the other side, holding his hand.
He didn't even look like my father. He didn't really even look human. His skin was real pale and pastey, his hair matted away from his head. They had tubes stuck in his nose and taped to his mouth.
I wanted to turn around and walk right out of that room. I didn't want to touch him or talk to him. He probably couldn't hear me anyway. I could barely hear myself think over the beeps and hums of the machines they had him hooked up to.
His hand felt rubbery. Like a fake hand. I only touched it because of Mom. I didn't want her to know how scared and upset I was.
"Hey, Dad. It's me, Simon. I'm here. I just wanted to let you know I'm here and Mykaela is here, but I had to leave her with The Colonel and Grandma Ruth because the nurses wouldn't let me bring her in to see you." I felt like once I stopped talking, I would start crying, so I wanted to keep talking until my three minutes was up, but my words dissolved into tears when Mom reached out and put her hand over mine where I held Dad's.
I looked at her, and I knew I couldn't stay in that room another second. I jerked my hand away from her and stumbled backward. I crashed into the wall, but I used the hard surface to propel me forward and out the door.
I couldn't see where I was going, and I didn't care. I only knew I had to get out of there, out of the hospital, away from the pain and the sickness and the fear. I just kept going, taking the stairs instead of the elevator so I could keep moving. I had to keep moving.
I didn't stop until I got outside. Even then I didn't want to stop, but my legs felt weak and I didn't want to fall on my face. So close to the hospital, someone would no doubt rush me back inside to see a doctor.
My bench was empty, so I sat down there. And I realized I had left Mykaela in the waiting room. Panic filled me, wild, crazy eyes panic. I knew I wasn't thinking straight, but I couldn't help it. My father was dying and I just left my baby upstairs.
I tried to run back inside, but slammed into someone as soon as I moved forward, and the impact made me fall on my butt. I just covered my face with my hands and cried right there on the ground. I didn't care who saw me, or what they thought of me sitting there crying like a baby.
The person I ran into knelt in front of me and reached out to touch my shoulder. I yelped, a sound inhuman even to my own ears, and tried to move away.
"Simon, Simon, relax, man. It's okay. It's only me."
I didn't care who it was. I just wanted to get away. I wanted Mykaela so I could run away from here and never look back. I don't know where I would go, but anywhere, somewhere far far from Glen Oak.
I scrambled to my feet, and the person caught my shirt and pulled me back, and the person wrapped his arms around me to keep me from running. I struggled against the hold, fought with all my strength, but I couldn't break away. After a minute I collapsed against the person, with no more will to fight left inside of me.
"Shhh, shhhh. I've got you. I've got you."
I looked up to see who it was, because my mind couldn't identify the voice. Matt? I blinked, wiped at my eyes. But Matt couldn't get away from school. Matt was still in New York...
"Matt?"
"I made it. I couldn't stay in New York. I talked to my professors again, and they agreed to let me have a week's personal leave."
I fell against him, crying again.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Okay, so I still haven't decided if I want to kill Eric off or not, so any reader's thoughts on that issue would be greatly appreciated. Tell me in review or personal email. You guys are the best. Thanks! Lucky Star (JjsLuckyStar@aol.com)