The ratings are going to change in a little while, so those of you who
don't keep stories like this in your favorite author's list, (I can't find
a story if I don't put one I'm reading in my favorite author's list) then
you might want to, because in a few chapters, the rating is going to change
to "R".
Chapter 12: Frickn' Hopeless!
"Kagome-sama!" Miroku and Sango said at the same time. She ran over to them super excited, "I'm so glad you're back!"
"Have you had any trouble?" Sango asked. (AN: WOULDN'T SHE LIKE TO KNOW!!!)
Kagome laughed fakely, "No trouble at all!" she lied.
Just then the demon Inu Yasha came over and stood behind her.
Miroku and Sango jumped back clutching their weapons. Miroku shouted, "Look out, Kagome! The demon is lose!"
Kagome looked over her shoulder, "Oh, him," she said casually and smiled at her confused comrades. "Don't worry, he knows his place."
Demon Inu Yasha growled, "Feh! Wench."
She sweat dropped, "Sit."
WHAM!
"Well he's LEARNING his place."
Miroku, Kagome, and Sango sat inside the huge hut. Kagome told them about how crafty demon Inu Yasha was and how he got Shippou to free him. She told them he was perverted but didn't want to get into any detail. Then they told her about Wiltsrose's counter-curse.
"You couldn't get those two to act opposite if you tried." Kagome said.
"We'll try anyway," Miroku said. "I'll go look for the demon and get to work on him. He'll be enlightened, emotional and refined in no time." He left the hut.
"Then I'll work on the human one!" Sango said as she smacked her right fist into her left hand and smiled. "Send him in!"
Miroku went looking around the village until he found him. Demon Inu Yasha was standing by the road. He growled at little kids as they went by making them scream and/or cry and run away. He wiggled his tongue and young women making them blush and look away uncomfortably. Miroku sighed and calmly walked over to him.
Demon Inu Yasha's ears perked as he heard the priest's footsteps. He looked up at him as he approached and growled low in his throat. Then he smiled and flexed his claws. He jumped at Miroku, but he was well trained.
Miroku reached into his robes and pulled out a spell scroll. "Forgive me!" he said. He tossed the scroll and it hit demon Inu Yasha square in the face. It immediately acted by sending an electric charge through the demon's body. "DAAAAHHHH!!!!" he screamed and fell on the ground writhing.
Miroku walked past him in a dignified manner toward the lake. "Follow me, please. We have much work to do."
Shippou and human Inu Yasha sat on the floor of the hut. Sango paced in front of them. Both boys watched her in silence until Inu Yasha spoke up, "Sango, if you would like to sit dow-"
"Stop!" Sango said quickly turning to him. "If you want me to sit down, you don't ask me, you tell me. Get mad and tell me!"
"Um," Inu Yasha sweat dropped uncomfortably. "Sit down?"
"I won't sit down!" she shouted.
He held up his hands in defense, "Okay, you don't have to-"
"No, Inu Yasha! You want me to sit down! You're tired of me pacing around, right?"
"Well-"
"Then MAKE me sit down!"
"But-"
"But what?!"
He tilted his head and looked up at his sheepishly. "I'm confused. First you tell me to tell you to sit down, then you tell me you don't want to sit down then you tell me to make you sit down and I can't tell what you're telling me what you want me to tell you."
(AN: Did anyone catch that?)
Sango looked at him, "What?!"
Inu Yasha suddenly became twice confuse, "Huh?"
Sango smacked herself in the face and sighed, releasing her frustration. "Okay, it's early in the game, we'll try something else."
"Inu Yasha," Miroku said. "Would you like to hear about a dream I had?"
The demon sighed boredly and said in flat sarcasm, "Sure, why not? Go ahead." Miroku looked upward, "It started out with the darkness and cold then colors started to collect together, colors that only come from delicate rainbows, swift winds and perfect sunsets. The colors swarmed together and collaborated into a giant mass of water, earth, air, and life. It was a symbol of Earth and all of the beauty within." He turned to the demon who almost looked moved. "What do you think of that Inu Yasha?"
Inu Yasha leaned forward and said, "What ever you're taking, I'll take two of them."
Miroku sweat dropped. Well, it was sort of progress-sort of.
Sango left the hut for a second and came back with a bag of rice. She set it on the floor and said. "Pretend this is Shippou."
The human Inu Yasha looked at it then at her, "It's a bag of rice."
"I know," she said. "But let's pretend this is Shippou for a second. Let's say Shippou has done the worst thing in the world. What are you going to do to him?"
Inu Yasha looked at the bag of rice, then Shippou, then the bag of rice, then at Sango, "But it's a bag of rice?"
Sango growled, "She was trying hard not to lose her temper. "Fine." She hissed. She kicked the bag of rice into the corner and went off screen. She came back with Shippou tied up and flailing like a fish. "WHY ME!"
"It's for a good cause, Shippou!" Sango said. She made Inu Yasha face her and she said, "Okay, what do you think the worst thing anybody could do is?"
Inu Yasha scratched his head. "I-I don't know."
"Try to think for a minute. What would make you mad?"
A few minutes passed by and Inu Yasha shrugged and said, "I guess if someone were to hurt Kagome."
"Aw, in't that sweet? ^_^" Sango said then got her war face on again. "Okay, now pretend that Shippou hurt Kagome, what are you going to do to him."
Human Inu Yasha turned to frown at Shippou and Sango thought, 'This may actually work!'
Shippou started shaking and mumbling a prayer. Inu Yasha kneeled down beside him and said in a calm and parental voice, "That wasn't a very nice thing to do Shippou." He untied the kitsune and said, "I think you should go find Kagome and apologize."
Shippou fainted. Sango thought she was going to faint.
Miroku and demon Inu Yasha paid a visit to the village idiot. The idea was to get Inu Yasha to laugh and think happy thoughts. The village idiot said, "There was this demon who walked into a bar and said, 'Ouch!'"
Miroku and the village idiot laughed. Inu Yasha looked at them like they were morons. (An: Keep in mind, back then, it was a new age joke.) Miroku realized he wasn't laughing, "Inu Yasha, don't you think that's funny?"
Inu Yasha looked from one moron to the other, "What, you want me to laugh? Do you want me to tell a joke?"
Miroku nodded, "Sure, go ahead!"
Inu Yasha smiled nastily and said, "Knock, knock."
Miroku said, "Who's there?"
Inu Yasha looked at both guys smiling then said, "Go f*ck yourselves!"
Silence............
Sango sat across from Inu Yasha. "The real Inu Yasha used to swear all the time and it didn't bother him." She looked over at Shippou. "Shippou, go out and collect osme twigs."
He jumped up and ran out.
Sango turned to Inu Yasha, "Repeat everything I say. Basterd."
His eyes widened like she had just flashed him.
"Say it."
is Inu Yasha looked around like he would see god staring at him from some corner of the room. He cleared his throat nervously and said, "Baaaaaaaaaaaaaa-" he cleared his throat again. "Ba-baaaaaaaas-ba-"
Sango ran out of patience. "Come on you sound like a sheep!"
Inu Yasha sweat dropped and looked at the floor. "I can't."
"How hard is it to say one word?"
"I just can't."
Sango stood up and walked toward the door, "I'll be right back, I need to go stick my head in the lake."
Miroku had allowed demon Inu Yasha a break as well. (He probably had to go stick his head in the lake, too.) Demon Inu Yasha walked down the dark street bored out of his mind. He hated having to spend the day with a priest, learning how to be a gay 'care bear.'
Why wouldn't Kagome just let him have her? It wouldn't take long, in and out and he would have a fresh batch of pups. If it wasn't for that stupid rosary, he would already be there. Stupid Kagome and her stupid heat!
Then he was passing by the hut and he saw the human Inu Yasha sitting inside with a long face. Look at him, the demon thought. He's not even a demon, he's bearly even a man. What did the demon have that the real Inu Yasha didn't? Gold eyes, a white kimono shirt......
Then he got another twisted and evil mentally disturbing plan. He started to walk toward the hut with a murderous look in his eye. "Sorry, Kagome, but I'm going to have to make up your mind for you!"
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Uh-oh! What's going to happen next!? Reviews would be loverly.
Chapter 12: Frickn' Hopeless!
"Kagome-sama!" Miroku and Sango said at the same time. She ran over to them super excited, "I'm so glad you're back!"
"Have you had any trouble?" Sango asked. (AN: WOULDN'T SHE LIKE TO KNOW!!!)
Kagome laughed fakely, "No trouble at all!" she lied.
Just then the demon Inu Yasha came over and stood behind her.
Miroku and Sango jumped back clutching their weapons. Miroku shouted, "Look out, Kagome! The demon is lose!"
Kagome looked over her shoulder, "Oh, him," she said casually and smiled at her confused comrades. "Don't worry, he knows his place."
Demon Inu Yasha growled, "Feh! Wench."
She sweat dropped, "Sit."
WHAM!
"Well he's LEARNING his place."
Miroku, Kagome, and Sango sat inside the huge hut. Kagome told them about how crafty demon Inu Yasha was and how he got Shippou to free him. She told them he was perverted but didn't want to get into any detail. Then they told her about Wiltsrose's counter-curse.
"You couldn't get those two to act opposite if you tried." Kagome said.
"We'll try anyway," Miroku said. "I'll go look for the demon and get to work on him. He'll be enlightened, emotional and refined in no time." He left the hut.
"Then I'll work on the human one!" Sango said as she smacked her right fist into her left hand and smiled. "Send him in!"
Miroku went looking around the village until he found him. Demon Inu Yasha was standing by the road. He growled at little kids as they went by making them scream and/or cry and run away. He wiggled his tongue and young women making them blush and look away uncomfortably. Miroku sighed and calmly walked over to him.
Demon Inu Yasha's ears perked as he heard the priest's footsteps. He looked up at him as he approached and growled low in his throat. Then he smiled and flexed his claws. He jumped at Miroku, but he was well trained.
Miroku reached into his robes and pulled out a spell scroll. "Forgive me!" he said. He tossed the scroll and it hit demon Inu Yasha square in the face. It immediately acted by sending an electric charge through the demon's body. "DAAAAHHHH!!!!" he screamed and fell on the ground writhing.
Miroku walked past him in a dignified manner toward the lake. "Follow me, please. We have much work to do."
Shippou and human Inu Yasha sat on the floor of the hut. Sango paced in front of them. Both boys watched her in silence until Inu Yasha spoke up, "Sango, if you would like to sit dow-"
"Stop!" Sango said quickly turning to him. "If you want me to sit down, you don't ask me, you tell me. Get mad and tell me!"
"Um," Inu Yasha sweat dropped uncomfortably. "Sit down?"
"I won't sit down!" she shouted.
He held up his hands in defense, "Okay, you don't have to-"
"No, Inu Yasha! You want me to sit down! You're tired of me pacing around, right?"
"Well-"
"Then MAKE me sit down!"
"But-"
"But what?!"
He tilted his head and looked up at his sheepishly. "I'm confused. First you tell me to tell you to sit down, then you tell me you don't want to sit down then you tell me to make you sit down and I can't tell what you're telling me what you want me to tell you."
(AN: Did anyone catch that?)
Sango looked at him, "What?!"
Inu Yasha suddenly became twice confuse, "Huh?"
Sango smacked herself in the face and sighed, releasing her frustration. "Okay, it's early in the game, we'll try something else."
"Inu Yasha," Miroku said. "Would you like to hear about a dream I had?"
The demon sighed boredly and said in flat sarcasm, "Sure, why not? Go ahead." Miroku looked upward, "It started out with the darkness and cold then colors started to collect together, colors that only come from delicate rainbows, swift winds and perfect sunsets. The colors swarmed together and collaborated into a giant mass of water, earth, air, and life. It was a symbol of Earth and all of the beauty within." He turned to the demon who almost looked moved. "What do you think of that Inu Yasha?"
Inu Yasha leaned forward and said, "What ever you're taking, I'll take two of them."
Miroku sweat dropped. Well, it was sort of progress-sort of.
Sango left the hut for a second and came back with a bag of rice. She set it on the floor and said. "Pretend this is Shippou."
The human Inu Yasha looked at it then at her, "It's a bag of rice."
"I know," she said. "But let's pretend this is Shippou for a second. Let's say Shippou has done the worst thing in the world. What are you going to do to him?"
Inu Yasha looked at the bag of rice, then Shippou, then the bag of rice, then at Sango, "But it's a bag of rice?"
Sango growled, "She was trying hard not to lose her temper. "Fine." She hissed. She kicked the bag of rice into the corner and went off screen. She came back with Shippou tied up and flailing like a fish. "WHY ME!"
"It's for a good cause, Shippou!" Sango said. She made Inu Yasha face her and she said, "Okay, what do you think the worst thing anybody could do is?"
Inu Yasha scratched his head. "I-I don't know."
"Try to think for a minute. What would make you mad?"
A few minutes passed by and Inu Yasha shrugged and said, "I guess if someone were to hurt Kagome."
"Aw, in't that sweet? ^_^" Sango said then got her war face on again. "Okay, now pretend that Shippou hurt Kagome, what are you going to do to him."
Human Inu Yasha turned to frown at Shippou and Sango thought, 'This may actually work!'
Shippou started shaking and mumbling a prayer. Inu Yasha kneeled down beside him and said in a calm and parental voice, "That wasn't a very nice thing to do Shippou." He untied the kitsune and said, "I think you should go find Kagome and apologize."
Shippou fainted. Sango thought she was going to faint.
Miroku and demon Inu Yasha paid a visit to the village idiot. The idea was to get Inu Yasha to laugh and think happy thoughts. The village idiot said, "There was this demon who walked into a bar and said, 'Ouch!'"
Miroku and the village idiot laughed. Inu Yasha looked at them like they were morons. (An: Keep in mind, back then, it was a new age joke.) Miroku realized he wasn't laughing, "Inu Yasha, don't you think that's funny?"
Inu Yasha looked from one moron to the other, "What, you want me to laugh? Do you want me to tell a joke?"
Miroku nodded, "Sure, go ahead!"
Inu Yasha smiled nastily and said, "Knock, knock."
Miroku said, "Who's there?"
Inu Yasha looked at both guys smiling then said, "Go f*ck yourselves!"
Silence............
Sango sat across from Inu Yasha. "The real Inu Yasha used to swear all the time and it didn't bother him." She looked over at Shippou. "Shippou, go out and collect osme twigs."
He jumped up and ran out.
Sango turned to Inu Yasha, "Repeat everything I say. Basterd."
His eyes widened like she had just flashed him.
"Say it."
is Inu Yasha looked around like he would see god staring at him from some corner of the room. He cleared his throat nervously and said, "Baaaaaaaaaaaaaa-" he cleared his throat again. "Ba-baaaaaaaas-ba-"
Sango ran out of patience. "Come on you sound like a sheep!"
Inu Yasha sweat dropped and looked at the floor. "I can't."
"How hard is it to say one word?"
"I just can't."
Sango stood up and walked toward the door, "I'll be right back, I need to go stick my head in the lake."
Miroku had allowed demon Inu Yasha a break as well. (He probably had to go stick his head in the lake, too.) Demon Inu Yasha walked down the dark street bored out of his mind. He hated having to spend the day with a priest, learning how to be a gay 'care bear.'
Why wouldn't Kagome just let him have her? It wouldn't take long, in and out and he would have a fresh batch of pups. If it wasn't for that stupid rosary, he would already be there. Stupid Kagome and her stupid heat!
Then he was passing by the hut and he saw the human Inu Yasha sitting inside with a long face. Look at him, the demon thought. He's not even a demon, he's bearly even a man. What did the demon have that the real Inu Yasha didn't? Gold eyes, a white kimono shirt......
Then he got another twisted and evil mentally disturbing plan. He started to walk toward the hut with a murderous look in his eye. "Sorry, Kagome, but I'm going to have to make up your mind for you!"
&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&
Uh-oh! What's going to happen next!? Reviews would be loverly.