Disclaimer: Inu Yasha and all the characters in it are the sole creation of
Rumiko Takahashi.
Japanese Notes for those of you that know absolutely none:
"sama"- The formal form of "Mr" or "Ms" used to express one of the highest
degrees of
respect
daijoubu- "It's fine", or "It's ok"
Ane- casual form for "older sister"
Ano- "um"
Youkai- "demon"
Sugoi- amazing
Uun, betsuni- no, nothing in particular
Ni-san - big brother
Houki- if you read the manga and/or watch the anime, you know what it is.
Not sure how to explain it. It's kind of the fighting aura the youkai
(demons) give off.
Gomen nasai- the formal way to say sorry, or forgive me
Kuso- a swear word, meaning "damn" or "shit"
"Rin. Rin? Don't you want to come inside?" Kohaku's voice broke through her reverie.
"Gomen. I was just thinking." She looked up at the night sky. The sky was dusky, yet peaceful. She had been reminiscing over the many nights she had spent watching the sky, waiting for Sesshoumaru sama to return from his adventures. Those nights she didn't try to run off and join him that is.
Suddenly, as though on que, a shooting star flickered across the sky.
Rin caught her breath. It wasn't often that she saw two shooting stars in a row. They had been a rare occurrence, yet there was another, as though it knew she would be watching.
"A shooting star. You know, if you make a wish on it, it might come true."
Rin smiled sadly. She already had.
"Too late," she whispered. The pale flower between her fingers glowed eerily.
Kohaku quietly sat down next to her and rested his hand on her shoulder. She looked up at him in surprise, but he wasn't looking at her. Instead, he stared off into the sky.
"I once made a wish. " There was no laughing in his voice. He stared into the space beyond the trees; the slowly rising glimmer of evening stars. "Of course I was much younger then. Before the shikon no tama returned and Naraku entered our lives." He paused. His eyes lowered, he seemed to struggle within himself.
Rin remembered that Kohaku had lost his memory while serving Naraku. Rather, he had wanted to forget. She could only imagine what he delved into as a myriad of expressions played across his features.
"Kohaku kun?"
"Daijoubu. It's still difficult sometimes . . . remembering." Rin nodded.
"Ano. . .what did you wish for? Did it ever come true?"
Kohaku smiled. Pulling away his hand he stared at the palms of his hands.
"I wished I could be brave. I was still so young then, but in our tribe, it was time for me to begin joining the hunts, to become one of the hunters. Ane understood my feelings. She knew how scared I really was. But then. . . on my first hunt. . .that's when everything went wrong. That was the night when Naraku took over my body and made me slay my own family. It was the night I died."
Rin shuddered. She remembered that feeling all too well no matter how many times she tried to shut it out.
"I don't remember anything much after that. My mind was void. All except for the image of my sister, . . . and strangely, the night I spent guarding you."
Rin blinked in surprise.
"Naraku tried to erase it from my mind, but I held on. Slowly I began to regain control of my mind. But it was hard. The memories were hard to bear. So much pain, guilt, rage, . . .all of it was suppressed for so long that once my mind was set free, it was overwhelming.
For a long time I ran. Once I was free from Naraku, I knew my sister would be looking for me, but I ran away. I couldn't bear to look at her, knowing what I had done. It hurt to see her."
Rin frowned. For all the years she had been isolated from the human world, she had at least had Jaken sama and Sesshoumaru sama. But to be completely alone. . .
"I made my sister think I was dead."
Silence. The words hung heavily upon the stifled air.
Kohaku sighed. "I thought it would be easier if I disappeared. I was such a coward. . . "
The leaves rustled. Rin shifted uncomfortably, but said nothing.
" I wandered for awhile. I hired myself out to farmers or hunted youkai when the need arose, but I preferred facing youkai rather than my own sister. It took me so long to come back."
"What made you come back?"
"I stopped running. For so long I ran because I was afraid. How could I ever be forgiven for what I had done? How could she ever forgive me? But then I realized one day that I was bringing more shame upon myself for running. It was strange. . . Serving Naraku and then wandering on my own afterwards, I had no longer become afraid of youkai. It was my sister whom I feared. It was answering to the past that frightened me more than anything. For so long, I really didn't know true bravery. But it was when I realized this . . . that the pain wouldn't go away until I confronted it, that I learned true bravery.
I finally came back two years ago. By then Ane was married and little Kohaku was already a year old. She named him after me believing that I was dead. "
Rin nodded.
"Of course she was thrilled when she saw me. Ecstatic even. She thought nothing of what had happened in the past. For all my apologies she dismissed them all. For her, I had come back from the dead. She wanted nothing of that past. She only saw the future. I wish now that I could have been as optimistic and forgiving as she is. So many years were wasted because of my cowardice. But that is all behind me now. I still struggle sometimes, but I try my best now to be there for my family. . . and to protect others now the way I couldn't protect them. It's the one thing that has kept me going."
"Sugoi. Kohaku kun is so brave. . . " The flower dropped from her fingers. She was happy for Kohaku. He had learned how to confront his fear. Though he struggled for so long he was finally able to come back to the ones he loved. Sesshoumaru sama . . . Would she be able to one day do the same?
"What's wrong Rin? I'm sorry to bore you with my story. I'm sure you probably have other things on your mind. . ."
"Uun. Betsuni.
"I see." Kohaku stood up, walked a few paces and stopped. He looked like he was looking for something. He searched the trees, focused for a moment, then came and calmly sat down.
"Don't force yourself Rin. I know it can't be easy. You've been with him so long, it must be hard to be amongst all us strangers now, even though you've met some of us before. We can't make up for his absence, but you're welcome among us. You're always welcome." He smiled at her. Rin was so surprised she didn't even know what to say.
Maybe it was in the way he smiled. Or perhaps it was the reassurance in his voice; the way he spoke with certainty and knew what was troubling her. Suddenly Rin felt like a child again. The barriers she slowly built up, holding back the pent up grief, came crashing down.
"I miss him." A tear trickled onto her hand. She didn't know how they had arrived so quickly. "I miss both of them. Sesshoumaru sama, Jaken sama. I want to go home. But I can't. Kohaku ni-san what should I do?"
Kohaku looked at her, startled a moment by the way she addressed him. But then his face relaxed and he put his arms around her. He tightened his grasp when he felt her begin to shake with sobs.
"Shh. It will be alright. Things always work out in the end." "AHH!!"
Jaken quickly made his way through the forest. After returning to the location where he originally found Rin, he discovered that both of them were no longer there.
"Well of course they aren't here anymore, they are probably at the village now," Jaken reminded himself.
It didn't take long before he reached the edge of the village and noticed two kids sitting outside. He gave them a passing glance, muttered over how indecent children were nowadays and proceeded along.
"Eh?" Jaken suddenly turned back. There was something strangely familiar about those two.
Jaken crept up as closely as possible. He noticed Rin, was concerned when he saw the sad expression on her face. He couldn't hear what they were saying, but he imagined it couldn't be anything too pleasant.
Then Kohaku put his arms around Rin. "AH! It's an emergency, that. . that. . that menace is trying to seduce dear innocent Rin! I should go teach him, . . but no, he spent many years as a youkai slayer, and Rin seems to get along with him. She did say she was going to stay here and live with him. Gah! He's going to steal her away! I have to warn Sesshoumaru sama immediately! He will know what to do. . ."
Sesshoumaru walked slowly through the forest. He followed his nose, his fingers itching with anticipation. He could feel the houki rising, surrounding him with the essence of the other youkai's fighting spirit. He always got a temporary high off of it. The peace before a battle, the adrenaline running off his competitor. He could feel it. He could smell it too. Like a subtle hint of wildflowers immersed in the forest, he could detect the other's nervousness and grinned. Well naturally they all got nervous around him. But this one was also determined. He would put up a fight.
"Sesshoumaru sama! Sesshoumaru sama!"
Sesshoumaru's lips sneered with annoyance. "Not now Jaken."
Jaken paused a few yards in front of Sesshoumaru. He too had finally noticed the youkai's houki.
"Gomen nasai Sesshoumaru sama, but it's an emergency. Kohaku kun, the former servant of that loathsome Naraku whom Sesshoumaru sama so graciously and magnificently used Tenseiga to resurrect is back, and he has Rin!"
Those last words rung in his ears louder than the sudden crashing of trees as the youkai Sesshoumaru traced began to flee.
Kuso. She always seemed to have the perfect timing. Gone only a day and she already run herself into trouble. His first reaction was a desire to protect her. He had grown so accustomed to it the past five years that it had become almost instinctual. But then he stopped himself. Why should he go rescue her? He had a fight to pick and had no desire to allow his prey to run.
Sesshoumaru tried to ignore the way Jaken's words still echoed in him mind, trying to concentrate on the movements of the youkai he'd tracked down. He tried to ignore the way he suddenly felt split, as though he was trapped between two immediate tasks. The girl didn't matter, he tried repeating to himself. She wanted to leave. She was asking for it as soon as she spoke of nonsense such as love.
Sesshoumaru stuffed all thoughts of Rin into corner of his mind and focused on the moving youkai. He could still sense him. His houki had grown. In it, there was a sense of anger, a drive for revenge. But towards whom?
Suddenly it snapped. Kohaku, a youkai hunter, the demon dashing as soon as Jaken mentioned his name.
The youkai wanted Kohaku. For a moment Sesshoumaru felt a slight grim satisfaction. He had no desire to get in the way of the youkai's revenge. He could wait for his own fight. But with the realization came a brief flash of panic.
Rin.
Authors note: I'm hoping that will appease all you who were so patiently waiting for Sesshoumaru to appear. Yes, I'm delaying the battle since I'm not particularly good at describing them ^_^; But next chapter should have Sesshoumaru in abundance. Thanks for the patience all you who have kept reading, and thanks for the reviews. =)
"Rin. Rin? Don't you want to come inside?" Kohaku's voice broke through her reverie.
"Gomen. I was just thinking." She looked up at the night sky. The sky was dusky, yet peaceful. She had been reminiscing over the many nights she had spent watching the sky, waiting for Sesshoumaru sama to return from his adventures. Those nights she didn't try to run off and join him that is.
Suddenly, as though on que, a shooting star flickered across the sky.
Rin caught her breath. It wasn't often that she saw two shooting stars in a row. They had been a rare occurrence, yet there was another, as though it knew she would be watching.
"A shooting star. You know, if you make a wish on it, it might come true."
Rin smiled sadly. She already had.
"Too late," she whispered. The pale flower between her fingers glowed eerily.
Kohaku quietly sat down next to her and rested his hand on her shoulder. She looked up at him in surprise, but he wasn't looking at her. Instead, he stared off into the sky.
"I once made a wish. " There was no laughing in his voice. He stared into the space beyond the trees; the slowly rising glimmer of evening stars. "Of course I was much younger then. Before the shikon no tama returned and Naraku entered our lives." He paused. His eyes lowered, he seemed to struggle within himself.
Rin remembered that Kohaku had lost his memory while serving Naraku. Rather, he had wanted to forget. She could only imagine what he delved into as a myriad of expressions played across his features.
"Kohaku kun?"
"Daijoubu. It's still difficult sometimes . . . remembering." Rin nodded.
"Ano. . .what did you wish for? Did it ever come true?"
Kohaku smiled. Pulling away his hand he stared at the palms of his hands.
"I wished I could be brave. I was still so young then, but in our tribe, it was time for me to begin joining the hunts, to become one of the hunters. Ane understood my feelings. She knew how scared I really was. But then. . . on my first hunt. . .that's when everything went wrong. That was the night when Naraku took over my body and made me slay my own family. It was the night I died."
Rin shuddered. She remembered that feeling all too well no matter how many times she tried to shut it out.
"I don't remember anything much after that. My mind was void. All except for the image of my sister, . . . and strangely, the night I spent guarding you."
Rin blinked in surprise.
"Naraku tried to erase it from my mind, but I held on. Slowly I began to regain control of my mind. But it was hard. The memories were hard to bear. So much pain, guilt, rage, . . .all of it was suppressed for so long that once my mind was set free, it was overwhelming.
For a long time I ran. Once I was free from Naraku, I knew my sister would be looking for me, but I ran away. I couldn't bear to look at her, knowing what I had done. It hurt to see her."
Rin frowned. For all the years she had been isolated from the human world, she had at least had Jaken sama and Sesshoumaru sama. But to be completely alone. . .
"I made my sister think I was dead."
Silence. The words hung heavily upon the stifled air.
Kohaku sighed. "I thought it would be easier if I disappeared. I was such a coward. . . "
The leaves rustled. Rin shifted uncomfortably, but said nothing.
" I wandered for awhile. I hired myself out to farmers or hunted youkai when the need arose, but I preferred facing youkai rather than my own sister. It took me so long to come back."
"What made you come back?"
"I stopped running. For so long I ran because I was afraid. How could I ever be forgiven for what I had done? How could she ever forgive me? But then I realized one day that I was bringing more shame upon myself for running. It was strange. . . Serving Naraku and then wandering on my own afterwards, I had no longer become afraid of youkai. It was my sister whom I feared. It was answering to the past that frightened me more than anything. For so long, I really didn't know true bravery. But it was when I realized this . . . that the pain wouldn't go away until I confronted it, that I learned true bravery.
I finally came back two years ago. By then Ane was married and little Kohaku was already a year old. She named him after me believing that I was dead. "
Rin nodded.
"Of course she was thrilled when she saw me. Ecstatic even. She thought nothing of what had happened in the past. For all my apologies she dismissed them all. For her, I had come back from the dead. She wanted nothing of that past. She only saw the future. I wish now that I could have been as optimistic and forgiving as she is. So many years were wasted because of my cowardice. But that is all behind me now. I still struggle sometimes, but I try my best now to be there for my family. . . and to protect others now the way I couldn't protect them. It's the one thing that has kept me going."
"Sugoi. Kohaku kun is so brave. . . " The flower dropped from her fingers. She was happy for Kohaku. He had learned how to confront his fear. Though he struggled for so long he was finally able to come back to the ones he loved. Sesshoumaru sama . . . Would she be able to one day do the same?
"What's wrong Rin? I'm sorry to bore you with my story. I'm sure you probably have other things on your mind. . ."
"Uun. Betsuni.
"I see." Kohaku stood up, walked a few paces and stopped. He looked like he was looking for something. He searched the trees, focused for a moment, then came and calmly sat down.
"Don't force yourself Rin. I know it can't be easy. You've been with him so long, it must be hard to be amongst all us strangers now, even though you've met some of us before. We can't make up for his absence, but you're welcome among us. You're always welcome." He smiled at her. Rin was so surprised she didn't even know what to say.
Maybe it was in the way he smiled. Or perhaps it was the reassurance in his voice; the way he spoke with certainty and knew what was troubling her. Suddenly Rin felt like a child again. The barriers she slowly built up, holding back the pent up grief, came crashing down.
"I miss him." A tear trickled onto her hand. She didn't know how they had arrived so quickly. "I miss both of them. Sesshoumaru sama, Jaken sama. I want to go home. But I can't. Kohaku ni-san what should I do?"
Kohaku looked at her, startled a moment by the way she addressed him. But then his face relaxed and he put his arms around her. He tightened his grasp when he felt her begin to shake with sobs.
"Shh. It will be alright. Things always work out in the end." "AHH!!"
Jaken quickly made his way through the forest. After returning to the location where he originally found Rin, he discovered that both of them were no longer there.
"Well of course they aren't here anymore, they are probably at the village now," Jaken reminded himself.
It didn't take long before he reached the edge of the village and noticed two kids sitting outside. He gave them a passing glance, muttered over how indecent children were nowadays and proceeded along.
"Eh?" Jaken suddenly turned back. There was something strangely familiar about those two.
Jaken crept up as closely as possible. He noticed Rin, was concerned when he saw the sad expression on her face. He couldn't hear what they were saying, but he imagined it couldn't be anything too pleasant.
Then Kohaku put his arms around Rin. "AH! It's an emergency, that. . that. . that menace is trying to seduce dear innocent Rin! I should go teach him, . . but no, he spent many years as a youkai slayer, and Rin seems to get along with him. She did say she was going to stay here and live with him. Gah! He's going to steal her away! I have to warn Sesshoumaru sama immediately! He will know what to do. . ."
Sesshoumaru walked slowly through the forest. He followed his nose, his fingers itching with anticipation. He could feel the houki rising, surrounding him with the essence of the other youkai's fighting spirit. He always got a temporary high off of it. The peace before a battle, the adrenaline running off his competitor. He could feel it. He could smell it too. Like a subtle hint of wildflowers immersed in the forest, he could detect the other's nervousness and grinned. Well naturally they all got nervous around him. But this one was also determined. He would put up a fight.
"Sesshoumaru sama! Sesshoumaru sama!"
Sesshoumaru's lips sneered with annoyance. "Not now Jaken."
Jaken paused a few yards in front of Sesshoumaru. He too had finally noticed the youkai's houki.
"Gomen nasai Sesshoumaru sama, but it's an emergency. Kohaku kun, the former servant of that loathsome Naraku whom Sesshoumaru sama so graciously and magnificently used Tenseiga to resurrect is back, and he has Rin!"
Those last words rung in his ears louder than the sudden crashing of trees as the youkai Sesshoumaru traced began to flee.
Kuso. She always seemed to have the perfect timing. Gone only a day and she already run herself into trouble. His first reaction was a desire to protect her. He had grown so accustomed to it the past five years that it had become almost instinctual. But then he stopped himself. Why should he go rescue her? He had a fight to pick and had no desire to allow his prey to run.
Sesshoumaru tried to ignore the way Jaken's words still echoed in him mind, trying to concentrate on the movements of the youkai he'd tracked down. He tried to ignore the way he suddenly felt split, as though he was trapped between two immediate tasks. The girl didn't matter, he tried repeating to himself. She wanted to leave. She was asking for it as soon as she spoke of nonsense such as love.
Sesshoumaru stuffed all thoughts of Rin into corner of his mind and focused on the moving youkai. He could still sense him. His houki had grown. In it, there was a sense of anger, a drive for revenge. But towards whom?
Suddenly it snapped. Kohaku, a youkai hunter, the demon dashing as soon as Jaken mentioned his name.
The youkai wanted Kohaku. For a moment Sesshoumaru felt a slight grim satisfaction. He had no desire to get in the way of the youkai's revenge. He could wait for his own fight. But with the realization came a brief flash of panic.
Rin.
Authors note: I'm hoping that will appease all you who were so patiently waiting for Sesshoumaru to appear. Yes, I'm delaying the battle since I'm not particularly good at describing them ^_^; But next chapter should have Sesshoumaru in abundance. Thanks for the patience all you who have kept reading, and thanks for the reviews. =)