Clues and Kind Words
Jo had left Rae and Jesse together and once she had been to the cafeteria had some breakfast and freshened up herself, she returned to the Rae's floor but tapped on the glass to Alex's room. He was awake and smiled a small smile as he saw who it was.
"Hey, an' how are you feelin' this mornin'?"
"I still feel as if the sky fell on me, but I know I am lucky to be alive, so I guess I have to be grateful."
Jo was instantly concerned, she moved over, looking at Shannon as she did so. "Honey, can I have a word with Alex for a moment, maybe you would like to go get some breakfast?"
"Ok, I won't be long though." Shannon left the room, and looked back for a moment as she passed the guard. Jo had taken her place next to the bed and had Alex's hand in hers. Shannon was glad for her presence, she hadn't been able to get Alex to say two words to her since he had woken up, and even though she knew that depression was common after such severe injuries, she hadn't expected him to feel so low so soon.
"Alex, look at me." Jo was concerned that he was avoiding her gaze.
"Why?"
"Because I love seein' your handsome face, why d'you think?" Jo felt a little cheered as her comment gained a smile. "Ok, you can either listen to me, or interrupt all you like, but I will say what I have to, it may just take a little longer that way." Jo tightened her grip slightly on her friend's hand. "You're right, you are lucky to be alive, an' everyone of us is just so relieved that you are on the mend, but you don't have to be lyin' here, feelin' that you should be grateful. When Rae came in from the prison an' you treated her, did you want her to be grateful for that?"
"No, of course not, it's my job, I know she's my friend, and I would always do what I could to help her, but I don't need anything other than the knowledge that I had done just that for anyone."
"An' why then, do you think it would be different for Wil? He was just doin' his job, an' I am sure that he was mighty relieved an' maybe even grateful himself that you survived the surgery, but he won't expect you to be grateful to him, that isn't why he does it."
Alex looked down at the bed sheets. He could see the dressing across his wound, and the bruises, which were becoming more livid; it seemed, by the minute. "But if I hadn't had that harebrained idea to take Eliana to see her mom then none of this would have happened. Rae wouldn't be even more badly hurt, we wouldn't be having this conversation, and … and Eliana would still be here… Jo, the whole thing is my fault." Alex could feel the tears rush up into his eyes, and then he felt Jo's hands on his arms.
"I know it is easy to blame yourself, but you have to stop it. Rae hasn't said anythin' about blamin' you, neither has Jesse, in fact Jesse sat in here with you, the whole time that Shannon was tellin' Steve all she knew about Eliana an' Louise, would he have done that if he blamed you for anythin'?"
"No, I guess not. Jo, I'm sorry, I'm just so scared… and … and Shannon, well we haven't been together very long, I can't expect her to stay here, but there's no one else." This time the tears fell and Alex began to cry. Jo moved herself onto the bed, making sure that she didn't pull down on the covers, and then very gently she took the young man into her arms.
"Oh, Alex, darlin' you have us all, you know that. You are a part of a very special family of friends, an' we will all be here helpin' you every step of the way." Jo stopped talking then and let her friend cry himself out. Gradually after a few minutes she could tell that he was beginning to get himself under control and she ran her hand over his hair and then looked into his eyes. "I would guess that you will be feelin' a little better for that."
Alex had nodded, not trusting his voice, and then he had taken her hand in his. "I'm sorry. Nothing like this has ever happened to me like this before, I'm not normally this weak, I've only ever been in the hospital once before."
"An' that was when you saved Jesse's life, if I remember what Rae told me correctly. I know nothin' like this has happened to you before, Alex, it happens to very few people, but you are gettin' better, an' all of us will be here for you, you do know that now don't you?"
"Yes I do, and thank you Jo, I guess I was feeling a bit sorry for myself, huh?"
"Honey, you had every reason, but nothin' good ever comes from it, ok?"
"I'm sorry, Jo."
"Well, don't be, an' if you need me again, you just holler, y'hear?" Jo looked towards the door then and saw Shannon standing the other side of it. "I think I am just about to be replaced, by a younger model no less." Jo leant over and kissed Alex gently on the cheek. "You take care now, or you will have me to answer to."
"Yes, Ma'am." Alex smiled, he had to admit, he did feel a little better.
Jo passed Shannon as she left the room, and felt the girl's hand on her arm. "Thank you, he needed someone to do that with, and we haven't quite got to that stage yet." Jo felt relieved, she had worried that Shannon might feel that she was trying to muscle in on her boyfriend. Jo checked her watch; it was just after eleven thirty. She looked into Rae's room, and was worried to see that Rae was lying with her face away from Jesse, and he was just sitting, hunched up and scowling. Wondering whether she would be able to help either of the occupants of this room, as quickly as she had Alex, she moved cautiously inside.
"Rae, are you all right?"
"No, of course not. I just want to be left alone and Jesse won't go."
"Why do you want to be alone, Honey?"
"Yeah, maybe you will tell her, because you sure as hell won't tell me."
"Jesse!" Jo glared at her friend. Losing his temper wasn't going to help. She could understand why Rae wanted to be alone, she knew that when things got tough she retreated to her bedroom and watched from a distance for a while until she knew what to do and how to do it. Well right now this was her bedroom, and now that she was no longer dependent on the ventilator she wanted to be alone to work through the devastating events of the last weeks, and especially the last few days.
"Jess, why don't you an' me go an' get a cup of coffee, we can just let Rae have half an hour to herself, an' then we will come back. Honey, would that help you d'you think?"
Rae very slowly and painfully moved her head back so that she was facing them, and Jesse knew that he was going to have to put a brace on her before the day was out. "Yes, thank you."
"Rae…"
"Jesse, just leave it, she will be fine, she has a guard on the door, an' a buzzer under her fingers. So, cup of coffee, now." Jo put her arm gently around the doctor's shoulders and led him towards the door. They stopped and just informed the officers there where they were going, and then to her relief, Rae found herself alone.
She shut her eyes, and began to look back at the memories that she had only regained the day before yesterday. She could see herself standing in Jo's house, her beautiful wedding dress making her look more like a film star than a cop. She remembered the photo that she'd had taken, she had been sat on a stool, with the train of her dress swirling around the legs of her seat. Patrick and John had been standing behind her, one young man by each shoulder, Mara had been sitting on the stool next to her mother, and Eliana, in her beautiful lacy dress had been cradled in her mother's arms. Rae smiled to herself, despite the tears in her eyes. No one had ever seen that photo, not even Jesse. She kept it in her closet, on the shelf underneath her sweaters. She didn't know herself why she didn't have it on show, or why she hadn't let Jesse see it, or be in it, but she did know that if she had to give up or leave everything else in this world, the four people in that picture with her were more important than anything else.
She thought of Steve, and knew that he would be searching for her child as if his own life depended on it. She knew that he loved the little girl as if she was his, and that made her feel a little more confident about getting her back.
Jesse's face came into her mind, and she smiled fleetingly. She had treated him very badly over the last few weeks, and she wasn't sure if she would ever be able to explain to him why. But suddenly she felt that if she didn't talk to him now, she would keep it inside her for ever, and he might not be prepared to wait that long to hear her. Slowly and painfully Rae pressed down on the buzzer underneath her right hand and waited. She felt that the action hadn't been quite as painful as usual, but she didn't try it again.
A young nurse put her head round the door, and smiled. "Yes, Detective Yeager?"
"Could you page my husband, and ask him to come see me please?" Rae looked at the young woman in front of her, and smiled. It felt good to be called by her rank again.
"Yes, Ma'am."
Two minutes later, Jesse came into the room, the worry and anxiety evident in his face. Texas wasn't with him; Rae had known that unless she had mentioned her name she wouldn't come.
"Jess, please shut the door." Rae watched him as he did so. Then she carefully raised her right hand off the bed, so that he would come and sit that side of her. It seemed that he always went to the left, and that side hurt too much to even think about moving.
"Honey, please don't shut me out anymore, I don't think I can bear it." Jesse felt his voice waver.
"I know, and I won't. I need to talk to you, Jesse, I am so very sorry."
"What for?"
"For what you said, for shutting you out. I threw you out of our house, Eliana too, when what I really wanted to do was just have you hold me tight and never let go. And now, when I can finally see that, you can't do it to me any more." Rae swallowed down her tears. If she cried she wouldn't be able to finish what she wanted to say. "When you finally got me to talk, really talk, about the dreams, and what they meant, I felt better, and I should have realised then that the one person in the world who could really help me get through all my problems was the one person who really wanted to do so."
"Then, why, Rae, why did you make me go away?" Jesse didn't know if he should speak, he knew that Rae had more to say, but he had questions that needed answering, and that was the main one.
"Because, I thought that if you left then nothing bad could happen to you. That you would learn to stop loving me, and move on. I had so many problems, and I thought that if I was left alone I would be able to sort them out, and maybe even move on myself."
"And now?"
"And now, I know that I was wrong. Jesse, I love you, I don't ever want to be like that again. My life isn't complete without you, please Jesse, don't hate me."
"Oh, Honey, I could never do that. I didn't hate you when you threw me out, I just went to Steve's and tried to work out what had happened, but I never ever stopped loving you, not for one second."
"Oh, Jesse, please, is there someway you can hold me? I just need to feel your arms round me so much."
Jesse moved closer to the head of the bed, and very carefully he sat on the edge. Then he positioned himself so that he was exactly opposite Rae, and he leant into her. He felt her let out a breath, and then she slowly rested her head on his shoulder. He raised one arm, and stroked her face. "I can't put my arms round you, not yet, but when you get in the chair, then I will, I promise."
For a minute or two they sat, completely still, just needing the contact that the strange position gave them. Then Rae began to speak. "Jesse, what will we do if they don't find her? I just want my little girl back, so that we can be a family again." Jesse felt her shoulders begin to heave, as her tears fell, and the feelings of helplessness that were resting just below the surface came up in him too, and with a gasp he began to cry, deep and desperate sobs, for the daughter he'd waited so long for, and had for so short a time. The room was silent then, apart from the weeping of the two people in it as finally they found the support they needed in each other.
When Jesse had got the page to go to Rae's room Jo had known to stay away. She contemplated going to see Alex, but she didn't want to intrude into either couple's lives right now, and so in the end she had stayed where she was in the doctor's lounge, waiting until it seemed the right time for her to return to her friends. She had just checked her watch and found it to be a little after twelve when her cell phone began to ring.
"Hello? Steve, Honey, have you got any news?… Oh, God, an' Eliana, was she there with her?… Steve, how are you gonna find her now?… No, no, they needed some time on their own, but I will go tell them. Steve, do you want me to come to you?… Oh, ok, yeah, if Jesse doesn't need me then, I'll do that. Steve, you keep in touch now, y'hear?"
Steve closed up his phone and took a deep breath. He had heard the tremor in Jo's voice, and it had made his emotions waver for a moment. The body of Louise Willis was being transported to the local morgue, and they still didn't have Eliana. As he stood there, the female cop from inside the bank came running up to him.
"Sir, Sir. You need to look at this." She was holding a piece of paper in a gloved hand, and he could tell that she was delighted with herself.
"Yes, Officer… what is it?" Steve tried to remember her name, but his mind was too full of other things.
"It is the form she was filling out. There's an address on it, Sir."
Steve looked at the address, which was in North Fine Avenue. "Do you know where this is?"
"Yes, Sir, it's out by the air terminal. Would you like me to accompany you?"
"Yes, yes, that would be good. You get your partner, if you lead the way, we'll follow. We don't know who else will be there, but somebody will need to tell them about Louise's death. If Eliana is there we are gonna need to get her to a doctor as soon as we can. Ron, we have an address." Steve was walking and talking at the same time, and the FBI agent had to run to keep up.
Soon the two of them were in Steve's car and heading out towards the airport.
"Did you call Jo?"
"Yeah, she's gonna tell Jesse and Rae, and then she is gonna go and stay with Dad."
"Won't she want to stay with Rae?"
"Yeah, probably, I know she's Jo's best friend, and she loves her like a sister, but Rae will just want Jesse with her right now, she won't be able to cope with anybody else."
Ron looked over at his friend, and realised just how close he was to Rae. He seemed to understand just how she thought and would react, and he knew that however this case panned out, the four of them would survive because of the close friendship they shared.
It took just over an hour before the cars turned into a tree-lined road, and they began to look for house numbers. It was a nice area, and as they drove past a signpost they could see that Phillips Junior College was on North Fine Avenue. As they got closer to the intersection with Clinton Way the young officer in the car in front began to indicate.
"Steve, you need to slow down now, they are parking just over there on your left."
The place they wanted would have been easy to spot had they known what they were looking for. The houses either side were painted white, and had window boxes full of winter flowering plants on each ledge of their three storeys. The house in the middle was grey and peeling. It looked as if no one had been near it with a paintbrush since the invention of emulsion, and the garden was just a mess of weeds and thistles.
The four officers left the cars and walked slowly towards the house. Steve took his ID out of his pocket and then banged on the door. "Open up, Police." He could see that Ron had his gun in his hand, and when he turned his head slightly the two other officers, whose names still escaped him, were heading round to the back of the property.
There was silence, but Steve was sure that the house was occupied. He had kicked his way into more houses than he would ever be able to imagine, and he had a kind of sixth sense about them now. This house may be quiet and tatty, but it was lived in. He banged on the door once more. "Open up, Police, now, or I'll kick the door in."
Gradually they heard the sound of feet walking down a hallway, and the door began to open. Steve stuck his badge into the gap as soon as it was large enough, and waited.
"What!" The voice was slurred, and after Steve had recovered from the fumes he began to speak.
"Are you Mr. Willis?"
"No. Reeves, Vernon Reeves."
"Reeves?"
"Yep. That's what I said." The man coughed, and the smell of whiskey wafted further out into the air.
Steve's mind raced, and then he realised what he had to ask. "Do you have a daughter, called Janine Reeves?"
"Nope, not any more. Bitch ran out on me ten years ago, she's been dead ever since."
"Vernon, who is it?" A voice floated through to the doorway and Steve took the opportunity as the man turned towards it, to put his foot in the door.
"Can we come in please, Sir, we need to ask you a few questions?"
"The step is good enough for you, cop."
"Ok, when did you say was the last time you saw your daughter?" Steve knew that he desperately needed the information that this man had, and so decided to stay where he was.
"Ten years ago. She walked out on me and her mom, ten years ago, an' we ain't seen her since."
"Sir, where did she go when she left you?"
"It was ten years ago, how the hell am I supposed to know."
"She was a minor ten years ago, you should have reported it." Ron moved slightly so he was standing behind Steve.
"Yeah, well, I didn't, so sue me."
"Did she have any friends, or other relations in Fresno that she might have gone to when she left here?" Steve knew that this was the only lead they had left. If this drunken bully didn't know the answer to his question, then they would have to go back to the station and start over, with TV appeals, flyers everything from scratch.
"Only that fool priest." Vernon Reeves turned his head slightly and spat, the globule he produced landing squarely on Steve's shoe. "Bingo!"
Steve repressed a shudder. "What priest?"
"Miles, Father Miles. Silly old goat, probably dead by now."
"Do you know where he lives? Or lived." Steve prayed that he was still alive; otherwise the dead end would come up to meet them once again.
"Nope, but his house was called, now what was it…? Mant something, mantl, no manse, that's it, he lived at the Manse."
"Vernon, Honey, come back inside. Mama needs you."
"I gotta go, cop. You have a nice day y'hear."
"Hold on, Sir." Steve looked over at Ron, and he walked to the side of the house and indicated to the two other officers to return to the front.
"You will need to let these two officers into your home, they have some bad news about your daughter."
"Sir, I'm Officer Nox, and this is Officer Albright, may we come in?"
"Seems like I have no choice."
"Vernon!"
"Juney, will you hush, get down here, the cops have something to say about Janine."
Steve looked over at the two young people in front of him, and Officer Nox began to speak. "Sir, you go and find that baby, we'll be fine here." The two officers watched as Steve and Ron headed back towards their car, and wondered just how close to the end they really were.
Jo had gone up to see Jesse and Rae, and had found them in each other's arms, crying together. She had sat outside the door for just over five minutes, trying to work out in her mind how to tell them that Eliana's kidnapper had been killed and they had no idea where the baby was. Jo still didn't know how to begin talking, and in the end she closed her eyes and waited until she became aware that the noise had stopped, and then taking a deep breath she walked into the room.
Steve and Ron could feel the urgency of their task building higher and higher, and Ron was on his phone before the engine started. "This is Agent Wagner, I need an address, the house is called the Manse, and the guy who lives there is Father Miles."
"Yes, Sir. Sir, is Lieutenant Sloan still with you?"
Steve could hear the dispatch officer's voice as she spoke.
"Yeah, why?"
"The manager from the bus depot called, he said that Fred dropped the girl off in the Michigan Avenue area."
"And the Manse, is that in the Michigan Avenue area?"
"I'm just checking, Sir."
There was silence in the car then, and for a moment Steve let the engine die. He picked up the map book, and found his way to the page with Michigan Avenue in it. He reckoned that it would take them about ten minutes to get there.
"328, Michigan Avenue, Sir. The Manse, Father Miles is the addressee I have here."
"Thank you."
Steve started the car again, and then the two men looked at each other. This could be all or nothing. If Eliana wasn't at this address, then she could quite literally be anywhere.