I Hate You (Parody of 'I Want You' by Savage Garden)
Disclaimer: (To the tune of 'I Love You, You Love Me...' by Barney)
I don't own
Gundam Wing
So big companies don't sue me please
I don't own Savage Garden
Or their wonderfully-written songs
Won't you please review my work?
A/N: I like "Rebel' best. I think most people liked that better, too. But this...isn't so bad. I guess this takes second place. Or something like that.
Ooh... Someone asked me to do a Savage Garden parody. Ami, I think? Here ya go.
Other stuff: Relena bashing. Hmm. Why do all my parodies seem to have those two ubiquitous words? Anyway, as always, you've been warned. So no flaming, please. Flames make my skin break out in huge, red blisters.
(A few months after Zechs checks himself out of rehab, he consents to direct another video for our Gundam pilots. From this point, he's the director, Noin's the assistant, and Nichol is still the cameraman.)
Zechs: Lucrezia, get the hospital. Tell them to have an ambulance standing outside the studio in case I suffer a heart attack or a seizure. Get me a few tons of Prozac, a few kilos of the finest pot, a couple cartons of smokes, and a few kegs of beer. Can you do all that?
Noin: Yeah, duh. That's what you don't pay me for.
Zechs: And while you're at it, make your name shorter. Why the hell did your parents name you Lucrezia?
Can't they have followed the whole number scheme? Couldn't they have named you Uno, Dos, or Tres?
Something less outrageous than Lucrezia?
Noin: ::sigh:: I guess I'm directing this sorry video. SECURITY!
(A few burly guards rush in and evacuate Zechs. Okay, they locked him in the ladies' room.)
Noin: Stop fooling around with the fucking vending machine and start warbling, ya loonies!
(Gundam pilots automatically stop jiggling, punching, kicking, and headbutting the softdrink vending machine and rush over to Noin.)
Wufei: Darn. No free drinks.
Noin: I'll show you babies how to jiggle the damn thing properly later. Now croon, ya washed-up middle-aged saps!
Quatre (protesting): Miss Noin, I'm only 17!
Noin: And I'm 21. Shut up. Who's the lead singer for this one?
Heero (sullenly): Me. Again. The authoress seems to be quite partial to me.
Mandelarae (from out of nowhere): I DO NOT! I LIKE QUATRE BEST BECAUSE HE LOOKS LIKE EDWARD NORTON!!!!!!!!
(Quatre blushes)
Mandelarae (shrugging): Well, he does.
Heero: Damn.
Noin: Sing.
(She signals to Nichol to roll tape. Heero positions himself in a metal contraption that projects his face on a huge screen)
Heero: Anytime I need to see your face
I just close my eyes
And I am taken to a place where
I am blind and
Suicidal feelings take up shelter
In the base of my spine
Bittersweet like Quatre's Earl Grey Tea
I don't want to try and explain
I just fasten my seatbelt tight
And if it you chase me I might move
So quickly
To the deepest, darkest most remote corners
Of the world
I need to, I want to
Get away from you
Go stand in that corner
Breathe in the carbon monoxide, get a bit higher
You'll never know what hit you
When I get someone to kill you
All pilots: Ooh, I hate you
I know that I don't need you
But ooh, I wouldn't die to find out
Ooh, I hate you
I know that I don't need you
But ooh, I wouldn't die to find out
Heero: I'm the kind of person who says screw a deep commitment
Getting comfy, getting perfect,
A life without you is what I'm living for
You come in the door
I'm on the floor
I pray to God that you don't see me crawling out the fire escape
Eluding you has a time and place
In the interaction of a soldier and a lunatic
But the time of talking
Using symbols, using middle fingers,
Can be likened to a mobile suit pilot
With all his shields down
Go stand in that corner
Breathe in the carbon monoxide, get a bit higher.
You'll never know what hit you
When I get someone to kill you
All pilots: Ooh, I hate you
I know that I don't need you
But ooh, I wouldn't die to find out
Ooh, I hate you
I know that I don't need you
But ooh, I wouldn't die to find out
Heero: Anytime I need to see your face
I just close my eyes
And I am taken to a place where
I am blind and
Suicidal feelings take up shelter
In the base of my spine
Bittersweet like Quatre's Earl Grey Tea
I don't want to try and explain
I just fasten my seatbelt tight
And if it you chase me I might move
So quickly
To the deepest, darkest most remote corners
Of the world
I need to, I want to
Get away from you
All pilots: Ooh, I hate you
I know that I don't need you
But ooh, I wouldn't die to find out
Ooh, I hate you
I know that I don't need you
But ooh, I wouldn't die to find out
Get the hell away from me, don't wanna find out...
(Noin signals to Nichol to cut, and the video's over.)
Noin (to pilots): I don't know what Zechs finds hard in directing a video! You guys were SO well behaved!
(All pilots cross their fingers behind their backs and nod energetically.)
Disclaimer: (To the tune of 'I Love You, You Love Me...' by Barney)
I don't own
Gundam Wing
So big companies don't sue me please
I don't own Savage Garden
Or their wonderfully-written songs
Won't you please review my work?
A/N: I like "Rebel' best. I think most people liked that better, too. But this...isn't so bad. I guess this takes second place. Or something like that.
Ooh... Someone asked me to do a Savage Garden parody. Ami, I think? Here ya go.
Other stuff: Relena bashing. Hmm. Why do all my parodies seem to have those two ubiquitous words? Anyway, as always, you've been warned. So no flaming, please. Flames make my skin break out in huge, red blisters.
(A few months after Zechs checks himself out of rehab, he consents to direct another video for our Gundam pilots. From this point, he's the director, Noin's the assistant, and Nichol is still the cameraman.)
Zechs: Lucrezia, get the hospital. Tell them to have an ambulance standing outside the studio in case I suffer a heart attack or a seizure. Get me a few tons of Prozac, a few kilos of the finest pot, a couple cartons of smokes, and a few kegs of beer. Can you do all that?
Noin: Yeah, duh. That's what you don't pay me for.
Zechs: And while you're at it, make your name shorter. Why the hell did your parents name you Lucrezia?
Can't they have followed the whole number scheme? Couldn't they have named you Uno, Dos, or Tres?
Something less outrageous than Lucrezia?
Noin: ::sigh:: I guess I'm directing this sorry video. SECURITY!
(A few burly guards rush in and evacuate Zechs. Okay, they locked him in the ladies' room.)
Noin: Stop fooling around with the fucking vending machine and start warbling, ya loonies!
(Gundam pilots automatically stop jiggling, punching, kicking, and headbutting the softdrink vending machine and rush over to Noin.)
Wufei: Darn. No free drinks.
Noin: I'll show you babies how to jiggle the damn thing properly later. Now croon, ya washed-up middle-aged saps!
Quatre (protesting): Miss Noin, I'm only 17!
Noin: And I'm 21. Shut up. Who's the lead singer for this one?
Heero (sullenly): Me. Again. The authoress seems to be quite partial to me.
Mandelarae (from out of nowhere): I DO NOT! I LIKE QUATRE BEST BECAUSE HE LOOKS LIKE EDWARD NORTON!!!!!!!!
(Quatre blushes)
Mandelarae (shrugging): Well, he does.
Heero: Damn.
Noin: Sing.
(She signals to Nichol to roll tape. Heero positions himself in a metal contraption that projects his face on a huge screen)
Heero: Anytime I need to see your face
I just close my eyes
And I am taken to a place where
I am blind and
Suicidal feelings take up shelter
In the base of my spine
Bittersweet like Quatre's Earl Grey Tea
I don't want to try and explain
I just fasten my seatbelt tight
And if it you chase me I might move
So quickly
To the deepest, darkest most remote corners
Of the world
I need to, I want to
Get away from you
Go stand in that corner
Breathe in the carbon monoxide, get a bit higher
You'll never know what hit you
When I get someone to kill you
All pilots: Ooh, I hate you
I know that I don't need you
But ooh, I wouldn't die to find out
Ooh, I hate you
I know that I don't need you
But ooh, I wouldn't die to find out
Heero: I'm the kind of person who says screw a deep commitment
Getting comfy, getting perfect,
A life without you is what I'm living for
You come in the door
I'm on the floor
I pray to God that you don't see me crawling out the fire escape
Eluding you has a time and place
In the interaction of a soldier and a lunatic
But the time of talking
Using symbols, using middle fingers,
Can be likened to a mobile suit pilot
With all his shields down
Go stand in that corner
Breathe in the carbon monoxide, get a bit higher.
You'll never know what hit you
When I get someone to kill you
All pilots: Ooh, I hate you
I know that I don't need you
But ooh, I wouldn't die to find out
Ooh, I hate you
I know that I don't need you
But ooh, I wouldn't die to find out
Heero: Anytime I need to see your face
I just close my eyes
And I am taken to a place where
I am blind and
Suicidal feelings take up shelter
In the base of my spine
Bittersweet like Quatre's Earl Grey Tea
I don't want to try and explain
I just fasten my seatbelt tight
And if it you chase me I might move
So quickly
To the deepest, darkest most remote corners
Of the world
I need to, I want to
Get away from you
All pilots: Ooh, I hate you
I know that I don't need you
But ooh, I wouldn't die to find out
Ooh, I hate you
I know that I don't need you
But ooh, I wouldn't die to find out
Get the hell away from me, don't wanna find out...
(Noin signals to Nichol to cut, and the video's over.)
Noin (to pilots): I don't know what Zechs finds hard in directing a video! You guys were SO well behaved!
(All pilots cross their fingers behind their backs and nod energetically.)