Goodbye My Love, My Life... My Light
a fanfiction complete by DeusExMachina
I do not own these exquisite creations known to the world as the characters of Yu-Gi-Oh. However, I do my best to weave around them the fabric of fantasy. They become mine in the sense that I control their every thought, word, and deed.
As such, if you do not relish hearing implied suicide, this fiction will do more harm than good. If it does not bother you, then read on.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
I... I do not know how to begin this. My hand trembles, making lettering and even holding a pen virtually impossible. My eyes are blurred with unwanted tears. In the dim lamplight, all I can see are shadows within shadows, and I am reminded of my mind, my soul. My side of life has always been the darkest. However when you, my hikari, solved the Sennen puzzle, I felt completed, as though your brilliant light were the perfect complement to my utter darkness.
Please do not be angered by my actions. I know in my heart of hearts that this is the necessary path to take. I am sorry for the agony I cause you. Your pain will cease, my hikari. Do not fear.
You are my light, my life, my very existence. You are my reason to live. You give voice to my inner pleasure, and the beauty of all that I desire, simply by existing. No words can tell, though some may try, of your pristine, angelic grace nor of your shimmering innocence. Those wide, pure, amethyst eyes shine with such childlike wonder... and your body fairly radiates the same. Your hair is onyx silken strands, melded with chartreuse satin and streaked with star-spun gold. Your mind is young but your spirit is strong, courageous, steadfast and true.
Many a time have I peered into your soul room to gaze in awe and soft pride at your serenely sleeping essence. The very sight of your beautiful face calms me. You are more precious than you know.
Ah, my light, you cannot possibly comprehend how my heart swells with every thought of you; when you speak, that accursed organ is sent thudding painfully against my chest; and your eyes, those portals into innocence this world has gone too long without, when they meet mine I cannot help but want to fall to my knees and thank the gods for sending you to me. 'Twas destiny that brought us together, my dear, sweet hikari...
And now it is destiny that tears us apart.
I know all the sorrow, pain, anguish and heartache that you know, but you know not the agony within my soul. How could you know, for you are but a youth and the fate of your world will never rest upon your pale shoulders as it once rested upon mine.
I took great pains to shield you from the evils of your world and mine, evils whose motives are beyond even my understanding. My light, your destiny is to follow your dream of becoming Duel Monsters champion once and for all, make your grandfather proud, as well as being a wonderful and doting husband and father someday.
That destiny need not include me.
I leave you now in order to save you, little hikari. For the evils that hunt us will leave you and follow me if I choose to go elsewhere, for it is me they want. It is for my blood they cry. And I do choose to go elsewhere: the shadow realm. I say that you are my reason for living, yes, however my life is not so important as the future which lies ahead of you. I choose to do this simply because... because I love you, my hikari. My light.
Do not waste any more moments of your young, precious life on me than you have reading this burden of a letter. Do not grieve. Do not weep. Forget me and my troubles. Forget me. Forget... I am old, far older than I appear. It is time for me to once again leave this mortal realm, however no puzzle solved will bring me back this time.
When I was Pharaoh, they called me heartless. I hope that, in my quest to find my past and defeat the growing evil, I did not seem that way to you.
Sayonara, watashi no tomodachi, watashi no ai, watashi no hikari... aishiteru, kirei na ko domo... watashi no ai... anata no watashi no seikatsu... aishiteru, watashi no hikari...
(Goodbye, my friend, my love, my light... I love you, beautiful child... my love... you are my life... I love you, my light...)
Watashi wa saru anata ima, so anata temo ii ryoku suru no ho ni hitori no soshite jiyu na watashi no shutsubotsu suru kako soshite kurayami sonzai.
(I leave you now, so you may journey on alone and free of my haunting past and dark presence.)
Kotoba dekinai iu jibun na, watashi no hikari.
(Words cannot say enough, my light.)
Demo, a soko de hitotsu koto karera dekiru iu.
(But, there is one thing they can say.)
Sayonara, watashi no ai, watashi no seikatsu.
(Goodbye, my love, my life.)
Watashi no hikari...
(My light...)
Yami