I Miss You
Chapter 15: (you have only been) Gone Ten Days
He is back at Princeton for his senior year. He recognizes the tell tale signs of senior-itis as they begin to bite away at his work ethic. Homework? Nah. Class? Right, maybe later if he feels like it. He feels perennially on edge, drowning in anticipation, like a little boy unable to sleep on Christmas Eve. Anticipating what, he isn't sure. One thing is for certain. That things he thought he would be looking forward to, back when he was a freshman, are no longer guaranteed.
It's hard for him, seeing his college buddies fall in love, one by one, and propose to their loves. He can't imagine what it must be like to be promised to someone for that kind of commitment, not anymore.
He is a fool when it comes to love. He is too stubborn to admit that he needs her, because that would mean admitting that it is his fault that they aren't together. She has apologized more than enough. It's on his shoulders now. She asked him for a reason to stay and he gave her none. He doesn't know why he left things the way he did. She put the question out there, put her heart on the line. And he refused it.
Maybe he's some sort of masochist. A glutton for punishment. An emotional retard. Or maybe he's just an idiot. Whatever the reason, he can't bring himself to let on how much she means to him still. It used to be so easy in high school, when they were teenagers caught up in the dizzying spell that is teenage love.
There's had been the unlikeliest of loves. He had thought it would be impossible for them to ever be together, especially then. But somehow, they had overcome every obstacle to share one of the most unforgettable years of his life. Unfortunately, that had been the easiest part of their relationship. It had fallen apart from there. For the life of him, they just can't seem to get it together. They seem destined to hurt each other forever.
But that's what love is. Love is pain. Love is caring so much that it hurts, when even though the rational mind knows that there is no way, the heart still hangs on for the smallest glimmer of hope. His love for her is real, because if it were not, he wouldn't be hurting as much as he is.
Does love end? Diminish with time? Humbly sink beneath the surface, lying in wait for a chance to reemerge? Which adage is true, "out of sight, out of mind" or "absence makes the heart grow fonder"? He has plenty of time to find out for himself.
***
He sits under the arch, cramming for a philosophy exam. The surrounding trees shine glowing hues of yellow and brilliant reds. His attention is drawn to a couple not ten feet away. The guy is down on one knee, the girl standing before him, eyes wide open in shock, chin trembling. He cannot hear the words being exchanged. Their words are meant for their ears alone. The girl regains a modicum of composure, enough to mouth the words, tears flowing, leaking from her dewy eyes. The guy cannot comprehend her acceptance at first, then leaps to his feet and lifts her from the ground in a tight embrace. "We're engaged!" he shouts joyfully, the ecstatic smile stretching his face to impossibly wide angles. Scattered applause erupts from surrounding students, shouts of encouragement and congratulations exchanged.
Tristin feels a tiny smile pass over his features, genuinely happy for the couple. This is how it's supposed to be. Once again, his thoughts return to a certain coffee addicted brunette. Who is he kidding? He is a wreck without her. He would be a fool to think that any other girl could ever compare to the one he let get away. So what is he going to do about it?
Enough vacillating with the "are we" or "aren't we." He's tired of treading the same worn groove they find themselves stuck in. They are going to get it together, finally find themselves on the same plane of existence, and move to the next level together.
He has enough regrets in his life. There's no way in hell he is going to allow her to become another one. His mind made up and a course of action determined, he feels better for the first time in a long time. He is pulling out all the stops. He is going to win her back or die trying.
15/21
I am very sorry about the sporadic (and short) updates. For this chapter, I felt that to make it go any further would be to unnecessarily rush it. While length is something that I love in great Trory fic, I also believe that ten pages of crap is worthless. That being said, I can't promise frequent updates, but I do promise that I will see this through to the end. Thanks for reading!
Chapter 15: (you have only been) Gone Ten Days
He is back at Princeton for his senior year. He recognizes the tell tale signs of senior-itis as they begin to bite away at his work ethic. Homework? Nah. Class? Right, maybe later if he feels like it. He feels perennially on edge, drowning in anticipation, like a little boy unable to sleep on Christmas Eve. Anticipating what, he isn't sure. One thing is for certain. That things he thought he would be looking forward to, back when he was a freshman, are no longer guaranteed.
It's hard for him, seeing his college buddies fall in love, one by one, and propose to their loves. He can't imagine what it must be like to be promised to someone for that kind of commitment, not anymore.
He is a fool when it comes to love. He is too stubborn to admit that he needs her, because that would mean admitting that it is his fault that they aren't together. She has apologized more than enough. It's on his shoulders now. She asked him for a reason to stay and he gave her none. He doesn't know why he left things the way he did. She put the question out there, put her heart on the line. And he refused it.
Maybe he's some sort of masochist. A glutton for punishment. An emotional retard. Or maybe he's just an idiot. Whatever the reason, he can't bring himself to let on how much she means to him still. It used to be so easy in high school, when they were teenagers caught up in the dizzying spell that is teenage love.
There's had been the unlikeliest of loves. He had thought it would be impossible for them to ever be together, especially then. But somehow, they had overcome every obstacle to share one of the most unforgettable years of his life. Unfortunately, that had been the easiest part of their relationship. It had fallen apart from there. For the life of him, they just can't seem to get it together. They seem destined to hurt each other forever.
But that's what love is. Love is pain. Love is caring so much that it hurts, when even though the rational mind knows that there is no way, the heart still hangs on for the smallest glimmer of hope. His love for her is real, because if it were not, he wouldn't be hurting as much as he is.
Does love end? Diminish with time? Humbly sink beneath the surface, lying in wait for a chance to reemerge? Which adage is true, "out of sight, out of mind" or "absence makes the heart grow fonder"? He has plenty of time to find out for himself.
***
He sits under the arch, cramming for a philosophy exam. The surrounding trees shine glowing hues of yellow and brilliant reds. His attention is drawn to a couple not ten feet away. The guy is down on one knee, the girl standing before him, eyes wide open in shock, chin trembling. He cannot hear the words being exchanged. Their words are meant for their ears alone. The girl regains a modicum of composure, enough to mouth the words, tears flowing, leaking from her dewy eyes. The guy cannot comprehend her acceptance at first, then leaps to his feet and lifts her from the ground in a tight embrace. "We're engaged!" he shouts joyfully, the ecstatic smile stretching his face to impossibly wide angles. Scattered applause erupts from surrounding students, shouts of encouragement and congratulations exchanged.
Tristin feels a tiny smile pass over his features, genuinely happy for the couple. This is how it's supposed to be. Once again, his thoughts return to a certain coffee addicted brunette. Who is he kidding? He is a wreck without her. He would be a fool to think that any other girl could ever compare to the one he let get away. So what is he going to do about it?
Enough vacillating with the "are we" or "aren't we." He's tired of treading the same worn groove they find themselves stuck in. They are going to get it together, finally find themselves on the same plane of existence, and move to the next level together.
He has enough regrets in his life. There's no way in hell he is going to allow her to become another one. His mind made up and a course of action determined, he feels better for the first time in a long time. He is pulling out all the stops. He is going to win her back or die trying.
15/21
I am very sorry about the sporadic (and short) updates. For this chapter, I felt that to make it go any further would be to unnecessarily rush it. While length is something that I love in great Trory fic, I also believe that ten pages of crap is worthless. That being said, I can't promise frequent updates, but I do promise that I will see this through to the end. Thanks for reading!