"Where is he?" Remus asked Sirius at breakfast. "He's not one to
skip breakfast. Even if he has a million things to do, breakfast is his
number one thing."
"Too true," Sirius said as he finished the last of his cereal.
"Where's who?" Kylie asked as she sidled next to Remus. I sat down on her other side and ended up also next to Sirius.
"James," I said absentmindedly.
"How'd you know he was missing? Don't you hate him or something?" Remus asked peering at me suspiciously.
"The way she was looking at him last night," Sirius chuckled, "you have beyond love.more like sheer want."
"Shut up!" I screamed as I shoved him off of his chair.
"Lily, calm down," Kylie cooed.
"I'm not a dog, that really does NOT work," I snapped.
"Please?" she asked begging with her eyes. Okay. It does work. Sue me. I lied.
"I'm going to go take a very long walk off of a very short cliff," I said as I got up and headed outdoors. I found myself treading towards the wood, and I didn't know why. Maybe there was food there or something. "Maybe because James flew there," an evil inner demon told me. "Oh shut up," I retorted to myself. I saw a broom broken in half against a tree. You know, that was the perfect comfort because as soon as I saw that, my pulse raced and I automatically assumed the worst. Great. Potter died. It's all my fault. I could have said, "Wait, no, come back." But noooooooooooooooooooooooo. Now Potter's dead, how the heck is a girl supposed to have revenge when a guy is dead!?
I continued on through the woods, and found his school robes. Well, I can tell one thing, wherever he had died, he had taken off his school robes willingly. Just like a guy. My last wish before I die is.I stopped the train of thought because I realized if he is dead he's dead and unclothed. Bad mental images. I made a direct U-Turn, and went back into the dorm. Who do I tell? I mean, I can't go up to Remus and Sirius and say, "Hey, you guys.I know I hate your best friend and all, but he's dead in the woods and I had the chance to stop him, but I was too cross with him for ruining my plots of revenge." Um, no. That is totally the WRONG way to look at it. "Um, hi, Remus Sirius, sorry if I'm interrupting anything, but you see your friend died in the woods. Oh, and by the way, he's not wearing anything so I would wear something to protect your eyes." Yeah, that seemed like a no go as well.
I sat on my bed in deep thought, and then I wondered what James would have done if our positions had been reversed. If he knew I was dead in the woods, and he hadn't stopped me when he had the chance. He would probably go straight to Dumbledore. A tear rolled down my cheek as it finally set in. It was all my fault. I provoked him, and I let him go without asking him about what he was doing or even attempting to stop him. Tear after tear fell onto my pillow, and I glared at the collecting pool noting my reflection was foggy. I hated mirrors; it was the result of being half vampire. Every time I looked in a mirror I saw a foggy reflection, I had finally given up, and now.now I can't even see my whole reflection in my own tears.
I flipped the pillow over so I wouldn't have to see myself in this pathetic state. I dragged myself out of the bed and washed my face. I walked to Professor Dumbledore's room and rapped on the door with my knuckles. I straightened my robes. Here I am, the bearer of news of death and I'm trying to be fashionable. I sighed as the door opened.
"Hello, Miss Evans. Can I help you with something?" Professor Dumbledore asked.
"Well, Sir, I have to report some news that will probably devastate the females of the first through fifth years," I paused to breathe properly and think of how I was going to say that James is a dead ringer.
"Okay then, Miss Evans, what is this news?" he asked.
"James Potter died," I said trying to not seem too uncaring, guilty, or happy.
"I miss breakfast and people automatically think I'm dead," the cold voice I recalled from the shadows last night drawled.
"James, you're not dead. You're not even half dead. You're.alive," I stammered.
"Yes, Lily. I'm well aware of the fact that I'm alive," he said sarcastically. I walked over to him and slapped him harshly. "Hey! What was that for?"
"That, James Potter, was for being alive and having the ability to breathe when you are SUPPOSED to be dead!" I screamed forgetting Professor Dumbledore was there.
"You're lucky I follow the rule not to hit girls, or you'd be in big trouble, Lily Evans," he warned.
"I'm shivering in my boots. Oh, I'm not wearing boots, so screw that idea.unless you'd rather screw your cow."
"I don't have a cow, and I don't believe it civilized to use profanity in the office of a highly sophisticated educator such as Professor Dumbledore." I rolled my eyes.
'Yeah, well, your broom is broken and your school robes are a mess," I said trying to make him feel bad.
"No matter, I can get new ones," he said glaring down at me. Suddenly, I felt intense heat directed at my head and I suddenly felt dizzy. He looked away, and after I stumbled slightly I regained my composure.
"Are you and Mr. Potter done flirting or would you like another go? I was talking to him about something very important, you know," Professor Dumbledore said filling the silence.
"We never flirt. I have more to do with my life then go crazy over that womanizer," I sneered.
"I've never done anything to you or anyone aside from a few harmless goddamned pranks, so go bother someone else!" he said on the brink of yelling but keeping his anger in check. I forced my eyes to meet his. What had happened to them? Not long ago, they were only chocolate brown and now they had a deeper more intense feeling behind them, as though he's experienced more then people of our age should. I stopped pondering and said what I had wanted to say.
"Go to Hell."
"I couldn't," he retorted
"Why not?"
"Because whenever I'm with you, I'm already there," he snarled and with that he was gone.
"That was unpleasant," Professor Dumbledore observed. Okay, maybe I did provoke the boy but that statement was a little harsh. "Whenever I'm with you, I'm already there" Yeah, very harsh.
"Too true," Sirius said as he finished the last of his cereal.
"Where's who?" Kylie asked as she sidled next to Remus. I sat down on her other side and ended up also next to Sirius.
"James," I said absentmindedly.
"How'd you know he was missing? Don't you hate him or something?" Remus asked peering at me suspiciously.
"The way she was looking at him last night," Sirius chuckled, "you have beyond love.more like sheer want."
"Shut up!" I screamed as I shoved him off of his chair.
"Lily, calm down," Kylie cooed.
"I'm not a dog, that really does NOT work," I snapped.
"Please?" she asked begging with her eyes. Okay. It does work. Sue me. I lied.
"I'm going to go take a very long walk off of a very short cliff," I said as I got up and headed outdoors. I found myself treading towards the wood, and I didn't know why. Maybe there was food there or something. "Maybe because James flew there," an evil inner demon told me. "Oh shut up," I retorted to myself. I saw a broom broken in half against a tree. You know, that was the perfect comfort because as soon as I saw that, my pulse raced and I automatically assumed the worst. Great. Potter died. It's all my fault. I could have said, "Wait, no, come back." But noooooooooooooooooooooooo. Now Potter's dead, how the heck is a girl supposed to have revenge when a guy is dead!?
I continued on through the woods, and found his school robes. Well, I can tell one thing, wherever he had died, he had taken off his school robes willingly. Just like a guy. My last wish before I die is.I stopped the train of thought because I realized if he is dead he's dead and unclothed. Bad mental images. I made a direct U-Turn, and went back into the dorm. Who do I tell? I mean, I can't go up to Remus and Sirius and say, "Hey, you guys.I know I hate your best friend and all, but he's dead in the woods and I had the chance to stop him, but I was too cross with him for ruining my plots of revenge." Um, no. That is totally the WRONG way to look at it. "Um, hi, Remus Sirius, sorry if I'm interrupting anything, but you see your friend died in the woods. Oh, and by the way, he's not wearing anything so I would wear something to protect your eyes." Yeah, that seemed like a no go as well.
I sat on my bed in deep thought, and then I wondered what James would have done if our positions had been reversed. If he knew I was dead in the woods, and he hadn't stopped me when he had the chance. He would probably go straight to Dumbledore. A tear rolled down my cheek as it finally set in. It was all my fault. I provoked him, and I let him go without asking him about what he was doing or even attempting to stop him. Tear after tear fell onto my pillow, and I glared at the collecting pool noting my reflection was foggy. I hated mirrors; it was the result of being half vampire. Every time I looked in a mirror I saw a foggy reflection, I had finally given up, and now.now I can't even see my whole reflection in my own tears.
I flipped the pillow over so I wouldn't have to see myself in this pathetic state. I dragged myself out of the bed and washed my face. I walked to Professor Dumbledore's room and rapped on the door with my knuckles. I straightened my robes. Here I am, the bearer of news of death and I'm trying to be fashionable. I sighed as the door opened.
"Hello, Miss Evans. Can I help you with something?" Professor Dumbledore asked.
"Well, Sir, I have to report some news that will probably devastate the females of the first through fifth years," I paused to breathe properly and think of how I was going to say that James is a dead ringer.
"Okay then, Miss Evans, what is this news?" he asked.
"James Potter died," I said trying to not seem too uncaring, guilty, or happy.
"I miss breakfast and people automatically think I'm dead," the cold voice I recalled from the shadows last night drawled.
"James, you're not dead. You're not even half dead. You're.alive," I stammered.
"Yes, Lily. I'm well aware of the fact that I'm alive," he said sarcastically. I walked over to him and slapped him harshly. "Hey! What was that for?"
"That, James Potter, was for being alive and having the ability to breathe when you are SUPPOSED to be dead!" I screamed forgetting Professor Dumbledore was there.
"You're lucky I follow the rule not to hit girls, or you'd be in big trouble, Lily Evans," he warned.
"I'm shivering in my boots. Oh, I'm not wearing boots, so screw that idea.unless you'd rather screw your cow."
"I don't have a cow, and I don't believe it civilized to use profanity in the office of a highly sophisticated educator such as Professor Dumbledore." I rolled my eyes.
'Yeah, well, your broom is broken and your school robes are a mess," I said trying to make him feel bad.
"No matter, I can get new ones," he said glaring down at me. Suddenly, I felt intense heat directed at my head and I suddenly felt dizzy. He looked away, and after I stumbled slightly I regained my composure.
"Are you and Mr. Potter done flirting or would you like another go? I was talking to him about something very important, you know," Professor Dumbledore said filling the silence.
"We never flirt. I have more to do with my life then go crazy over that womanizer," I sneered.
"I've never done anything to you or anyone aside from a few harmless goddamned pranks, so go bother someone else!" he said on the brink of yelling but keeping his anger in check. I forced my eyes to meet his. What had happened to them? Not long ago, they were only chocolate brown and now they had a deeper more intense feeling behind them, as though he's experienced more then people of our age should. I stopped pondering and said what I had wanted to say.
"Go to Hell."
"I couldn't," he retorted
"Why not?"
"Because whenever I'm with you, I'm already there," he snarled and with that he was gone.
"That was unpleasant," Professor Dumbledore observed. Okay, maybe I did provoke the boy but that statement was a little harsh. "Whenever I'm with you, I'm already there" Yeah, very harsh.