Most Unlikely Cause of Death
Ayako
Murdered by Ryota
[Ayako is getting married. Ryota plans on killing her.
Ryota thinks to self If I can't have her no one can. Goes into Ayako's dressing room with knife in pocket.
Ayako: Ryo…why are you here?
Ryota heart shape eyes: Aya-chan…
Ryota decides he can't kill her, after all she is his Aya-chan: Nothing…you look so lovely today…
Ryota hides knife and decides he's going to go kill the groom instead. Runs out.
Ayako: …]
Hikoichi
Nagged to Death
[Hikoichi's wife: Didn't I tell you to put the toilet seat back down when your done?
Hikoichi search through notebook: Nope. You told me to wash my hands after I use the washroom. Mop up the wet floor after I shower. Roll the toothpaste from the bottom. Put…
Hikoichi's wife: …
After 5 minutes Hikoichi: Maybe it's in my old notebooks…]
Rukawa
To Die of Thirst He drools every time he sleeps, and he sleeps all the time. Bottle up what he drools and well you got an endless water source though I'm not sure how much you'd want to drink that. Plus he conserves his saliva by not talking.
Attack by Grizzly Bear (Grizzly Bears won't eat you if you play dead)
[A pack (?) of grizzly bears come and raid Shohoku's campsite.
Everyone runs and bears chase them and kills most of them.
Rukawa: Zzzzzz…
Grizzly bear roars and begins pawing at Rukawa.
Rukawa is being rolled around like a rag doll: Zzzzzz…
Grizzly bear determines Rukawa is dead and leaves him alone.]
Coach Anzai
Starving to Death look at him. He has so much fat reserve. Like a camel except it's all on his belly and not back. Plus he's always in a hibernation like state (people on Ryonan's team thought it was a cardboard cut out *L*) I'm sure he can survive the entire winter without food.
Sendoh
Being Killed by Crazy Monkey's Throwing Coconuts and Fruit
[Sendoh has gotten separated from Team Ryonan in the jungle. Monkeys screeching. Feels head getting heavy. Touch hair. Pulls out a coconut.
Shrugs. Drinks the juice from the hole in the coconut ( hole was caused by his spiky hair).
Is hungry now. Feels that head is still heavy than usual.
Pulls out some bananas that has as many holes as Swiss cheese.
Sendoh wonders 'Are there any lemons stuck in my hair? Cause I got a craving for some.'
Sendoh begins searching his hair]
Starving to Death in Jungle obvious reason isn't it? His hair is a fruit trap. *S*
Haruko
Murdered by Hanamichi Read Ayako's (just switch her name with Ayako and Ryota with Hanamichi).
Die because she's Heartbroken If she's going to die because of that she should be dead a long time ago. Does Rukawa even know her name?
Akagi
Dying from Embarrassment he survived being butt naked in a gymnasium full of people didn't he? (Butt naked not stark naked *shudders*)
Attack by Overprotective Female Gorilla
[Team Shohoku walks in forest, runs across a baby gorilla. Hanamichi goes and bugs it. Mother gorilla attacks. Everyone runs for their lives and a lot are killed.
Mother gorilla traps Akagi and suddenly her vicious eyes change to heart-shaped ones.
Akagi: …
Mother gorilla grabs Akagi and begins kissing him.
"…"]
Hanamichi
Death from any Head Trauma or Injury
[Hanamichi driving car without seat belt. Spots Haruko waving at him. Waves back eagerly with both hands. BAM!! Hit's a cement building. Flies out the windshield and through the wall.
Hanamichi gets out and rubs head: Stupid wall!
Headbutts the wall which is reduced to rubble.
Runs out to find his Haruko-chan]
Being Eaten by Bears or Killed by Angry Gorilla Why? Is it not obvious? Because he can run so fast. His friends and team mates will surely be eaten before him.
Kiyota
Bored to Death
[Kiyota's imagination:
Kiyota looked at Sendoh, Rukawa, and Sakuragi who have shrunken to his height: Bring it on you 3.
Sendoh coming at him. He easily steals the ball from Sendoh and passes the super rookie Rukawa, he then proceeds to dunk on Hanamichi's head.
Kiyota: What do you 3 have to say now?
Hanamichi: You are the true genius.
Rukawa: The true super rookie.
Sendoh: I lost to you but I don't mind losing to such a handsome, wise, talented player.
Kiyota: Nyahahahaha.]
A guy with such a vivid imagination won't die of boredom.
Fukuda
Being Suffocated by Crazy Fans
[The SD characters are having an autograph signing. There is a lot of pushing, shoving, groping, kissing, yelling and such going on.
Rukawa's fans: Get away from him!! I want his drool!! I'm sleeping beside him! You get away!!
Hanamichi's fans: Awwww, I love your fuzzy monk haircut!! It looks so cute!! Can I touch it?!
Ryota's fans: I love you Ryo-kun!! Dump that stupid violent Ayako and go out with me!!
Kogure's fans: You're so cute!! Can I have you glasses as a souvenir? Please!!
Anzai's kiddie fans that still believe in Santa Claus: This is sooooo cool! Your stomach can do the wave!! And it's soooo bouncing. Can I jump on it?! Lay down!! I want to use it as a trampoline.
Maki's middle age fans: I just looooove mature men. And you're so well built too…soooo sexy!!
Hikoichi's note taking fans: You think I can look at your notebook and compare it with mine?!! Please Hiko-kun….
(You get the point every has fans. Yes, even Hikoichi and Anzai)
Fukuda's couple of fans that are dressed goth like (Fan 1 in a low voice): So you're Kicchou Fukuda, huh?
Fukuda: Yes.
Fan 2 in a not quite awaken voice: You think you can give me and my cousin your autograph?
Fukuda: I guess. Where shall I sign?
Fan 1 holds out a pen: My hand. It's permanent, water proof ink.
"…"]
The End of Most Unlikely Cause of Death