3rd chap! I have this nagging feeling that Sendoh is getting more and more OOC. *bends head in shame* if that's true, I hope you won't mind it and enjoy the story nonetheless. I think I had some problems getting in touch with Sendoh's character!
*kicks Sendoh in the butt*
authoress: Why must you be so hard to get in touch with, you smiley baka!
Sendoh: Huh?
*nothingtodo rages on angrily, chasing Sendoh all the way to South Pole*
Anyway, back to business.
Patty g: I really AM confusing you, am I? First the Fujima fic and now this one! *drops onto knees* Forgive me, patty-san. I don't know how to explain, so won't. Try reading it again, maybe it'll make sense then? *crosses fingers*
Tensaispira: What's that 'ahem' supposed to mean? *eyes study tensaispira suspiciously*
Jo-sen7: Yeah, I'll make him return A.S.A.P I'm not gonna write without him for the whole 12 months! So you can uncross your fingers, jo-sen!
Fer-chan: Heh heh, misspelled your name again, didn't I? Sorry! Loved your self-insert there!
Alexia: I'm surprised you laughed through the fic. Pleasantly surprised, that is. : ) My nickname is the result of uncreative-thinking at the time I was signing up. Heh heh. I'm a dumbo at times. But I rather like my nick! And yes, you're having the Maki fic. No one's going to steal it from you. : )
Silhouette Panther: Trust me, SP, I myself don't know what on earth I'm thinking of at times. But you can wait on if you want! Ha ha!
Joy: I am hurrying up all I can with the chappies! Hope you like this one!
Reika Zelon: Yes, I was thinking of pigs and ham when I typed that name out! Ha ha! How can you have hentai thoughts about Porka alleviating her boredom when Sendoh's away? Who's she going to get all cosy with? The horse? : )
SLL: I did make Akira seem cruel, didn't I? I don't know why I did it. I think I felt like giving Sendoh something else to do other than smile away in this fic at that time. Ha ha!
Tiran: Pissed she is. And yes, I'm making Sendoh go away for a year. But he's coming back now, so don't worry. : )
Shirodachi: YOU READ DAVID EDDINGS TOO??? *jumps around excitedly* he's cool, isn't he? Can't resist his sense of humour! Yeah, I got the idea after re-reading the Mallorean for God-knows-how-many-times. : ) You don't read yaoi fics? They're not that bad, some of them. Still, am pleased you like this fic. : )
Fiery Ice: What type of slave? I don't know. The half-slave type? I see that my fics make you rather emotional – and that's a good feeling! Ha ha! *beams at fiery ice* And I love you too. : ) of course, not in 'that' way either. Ha ha ha!
Kka: 'Porka' makes you hungry? I wonder why… ;P
Rei-142: Next chapter dished up! You feel sorry for Porka? I think it's her fault really. I originally wanted to make her ANNOYING, but and I think I did quite well, but everybody else seems to like her. ???
Jo: Not stopping! Read on, Jo!
Lazuli: Inviting… oh yeah. Wonder if he's generous with the invitations, hmm? Nah, I think I'm okay with the name Porka. And yay! Another DAVID EDDINGS fan! You and I and Shirodachi should get together! Ha ha! I really like Ce'Nedra, though sometimes I feel like sticking her head down the toilet bowl. And Kheldar is amazing.
Dreamiegal: Hi, ice1387 (hah! Got the numbers right!!) Congratulations on becoming new member of FF! Looking forward to when you start writing fics!! And yes, your new name IS easy to remember *wink*. Hi there in the Phillippines!
He was returning.
After eleven months, thirty days and 6 hours 50 minutes, he was finally returning.
Porka watched the hustle and bustle of the maids and stable boys as they scurried around preparing for the banquet with an expression of obliviousness. Everyone, in her opinion, was making too much of a fuss about the entire thing. Even Aki was primly dressed up in coat and tie, eagerly waiting at the doorstep of the mansion, shuffling his long, awkward legs restlessly.
Everybody was so outrageously happy.
Porka frowned a little at that. She herself hadn't figured out what she personally felt about it. Her master and her did not part on friendly terms the last time they were together, and it was unlikely they'd meet again any other way. Porka had sacrificed a good part of yesterday to figure out an impossibly polite but sarcastic welcome, but couldn't come up with one that delivered her feelings perfectly.
It was hard to decide who was going to have a worse day, Sendoh or her. But she was sure each would try their very best to irritate the other.
"Darling," Ayako, the Head Cook, called her, bustling with a huge, three layer cake. "will you please help me?"
Porka smiled sweetly. "No."
Ayako placed the cake down and crossed her arms, a posture that made her look more threatening than her favourite paper fan could ever accomplish. "Don't be silly." She ordered crisply, suddenly ballooning up to her full height. "You WILL help me. You WILL do something nice for Sendoh. And you WILL decorate this cake as nicely as you can."
Porka wasn't easily scared, but Ayako pulled out the worst in her. Still, she rebelled. "And what if I won't?"
"I'll carve out your belly with this knife here," she held up a huge, butcher's knife, "and roast you up nicely."
She looked so serious. Porka paled a bit. "You wouldn't."
"Who's going to stop me?"
Deciding she'd rather have her belly intact that cooked, Porka grudgingly started labouring over the cake.
"Do be a dear and write a nice little message," Ayako told her, going back to her normal nice self. "You know, something like, 'We missed you' or whatever."
Porka smiled, imaginary devil's horns poking up from her head. "No problem, Ayako," she crooned, her tone sugar-sweet. "No problem at all."
He wasn't even halfway up the steps leading up to the main door when Aki emerged out of nowhere and jumped on him. Both toppled over and landed butt-first on the brown earth. Sendoh grunted audibly as Aki's full weight rested on him.
"You're back!" Aki was blabbering to him. "It's so good to have you back! How was the hunt? Were there many animals? Did you see a tiger?? Did you hunt anything? Did you get anything for me??"
"I can't breathe," Sendoh wheezed.
Aki blinked. "Oh." He pulled himself and his brother up. "Well? What have you got to say??"
Sendoh rubbed his stomach where Aki's knee had landed. "You've put on more than just a few pounds, boy."
Aki pouted. "That's not what I was hoping to hear."
"You've grown taller too."
Aki shook his head. "That's still not it."
Sendoh grinned. "Look into that trunk over there," he pointed behind him. "You might find some surprises."
Aki quickly rushed over and was soon screaming in delight. "Leopard's skin! Super! Wah! There's a deerskin too! And look! Here!" His inspection and comments grew more and more elaborate as he dug deeper into the pile.
"He'll be busy for the next few hours," Ayako commented as she stepped up beside Sendoh.
"Days," he corrected. "I've got more trunks."
"Oh dear." Giving the ecstatic young boy a disapproving look, Ayako led Sendoh into a room where dinner was laid out. "Welcome back. It's been a nice hunt, I take it."
"Very nice," Sendoh agreed, helping himself to a tart. He greeted the other maids and stable boys warmly. Something was missing, but since he couldn't put a finger on it, he shrugged it off and started to tell his story in the past one year. "It was huge," he was saying to the wide-eyed audience. "I've never seen a leopard so big. It was right in front of me, eyes narrowed and mouth agape, teeth glinting –"
"Here's the cake," Ayako told him.
"Right," Sendoh absently opened the box. "Luckily, I had a weapon with me, and I just –" he stopped abruptly. "Aah."
On the surface of the cake, in bold blue and yellow, were scrawls of greetings. It started nicely enough, saying: Welcome back. Then – How come you're not dead yet? There was a nicely drawn picture of a tomb with his name on it.
Sendoh couldn't stop the smile. Porka.
Ayako's face was one of unbearable humiliation. "I'm so sorry," she stammered, quickly closing the box to hide the cake from view. "If I had known that troublemaker would –"
"It's all right," Sendoh dismissed it, digging into his pocket for a fair-sized, glossy pot. "I have a surprise for her too." He bounded off in search, leaving Ayako fussing over the disastrous cake.
It wasn't all that hard to find her. Porka had this habit of making as much noise as possible when she moved that echoed through the empty hallways. He found her busily cursing over a book. "Stupid!" she yelled at the object, down on her knees on the floor, her arms ready to fling the book to the other end of the world. "How can you say a ball is square??"
"I'm sure the book will explain," Sendoh muttered, "if only it could speak."
Her eyes shot to him angrily. Then, with what that must've caused her a lot of effort, she constructed a smile for him and bowed her head slightly. "Welcome back, Master," she said, though her tone indicated she didn't mean a single word. "I've missed you most terribly."
"I'm sure you did." He smiled sardonically. "You sure went through a lot of trouble over that cake."
Her eyes lighted. "I knew you'd like it." She stood up and deliberately pulled a pose that will benefit him with the best view of her. His eyes widened noticeably, and he seemed to forget his carefully prepared speech for a moment.
"You've grown." He murmured.
It wouldn't have been so insulting if he hadn't sounded so surprised. Porka gritted her teeth. "I have. It's pretty natural among human beings to do so, especially at my age."
He continued staring at her, and she found she rather liked being under his intense gaze. Then he blinked, and what little signs of admiration on his face disappeared, only to be replaced with a bright smirk. "I have something for you."
Disappointed at his less than enthusiastic reaction, Porka sighed. "How nice." She received the pot from him and opened it. Peering inside, she saw a flash of green. "What on earth – Aaaaaaaaaargh!"
"Cute, isn't it?"
Porka still held the pot, though her hands shook and she kept a clear distance between the pot and her face. "It's a snake!!" she shrieked. "It's a tiny green snake!"
Sendoh nodded. "Yep. Venomous." He gave her a sly look. "Just like you."
She was too stunned to speak.
"Her name's Pork. Named it after you, since you two are so alike." He grinned, apparently very satisfied, and headed out of the room. "Have fun."
She stood where she was for a couple of minutes before reality sank in. "You can't name her Pork, you idiot!" she screamed. "She's a SNAKE. A REPITILIAN! Not even a lunatic would name her Pork!"
"Well," came the muffled reply for afar. "That shows I'm not a lunatic." Laughing, he disappeared.
She was about to go after him with some ideas of educating him to differentiate between mammals and reptilians when Ayako stepped inside, towering over her. Porka gulped.
Aah…
Ayako regarded her with a cold look, a paper fan resting comfortably in her left hand. Porka desperately returned the look with a smile. "I have nothing to say to you," Ayako told her stiffly. "You have humiliated me beyond repair. Of all the things that you could have done, you had to write such an incredulously stupid message – and a picture too! Not a very flattering one, if I recall correctly. It's a miracle I didn't blow up …"
Nothing to say to me. Right. Porka thought as Ayako went on, paper fan waving dangerously in the air.
"… I could have dug myself a grave and planted myself there till the end of time if Master wasn't in a forgiving mood. I tell you, I never –"
"I'm sorry, Ayako dear." It was the smoothest way to stop her from talking.
"Sorry?" she scoffed. "Sorry won't fix anything. I will have to punish you."
Porka sighed. So what else is new? "Sure. What am I to do to please you?" The fact that she didn't look at all guilty aggravated Ayako.
Ayako's eyes glinted evilly. "We will be having a party tonight," she informed. "Lots of guests will be coming."
"To celebrate Master's return?" Porka groaned plaintively. "Again? Why is it such a big deal??"
Ayako ignored her. "You will wash tonight's dirty plates."
Porka refrained herself from frowning. She hated doing the dishes, absolutely loathed it. And washing several hundred dirty plates tonight didn't excite the mind or heart. She had to think of something fast. "Oh, okay. At least it's not sweeping the balcony. I hate sweeping, don't you? Especially at night."
Ayako's eyes narrowed. "I changed my mind." She said then. "Your punishment is to sweep the balcony tonight."
Porka feigned a horrified look. "Ayako! How could you??"
Ayako looked extremely pleased. "That's your punishment." She prepared to walk out and bask in her glory of giving Porka the worst task ever. "By the way, your dress for tonight is over there."
Porka looked at the material slung carelessly over a chair. "That? That's a dress?? I thought it was a rug." She stared at the supposed rug. "I'm supposed to sweep the balcony wearing that??"
"Why, yes."
"I'll look ridiculous!"
Ayako smiled again, though her eyes flashed dangerously, challenging Porka to protest again. "I suppose so. Isn't that just too bad?"
Imagine Porka in a dress. *chortles*