A/N: Hello! I'm back! Dun dun dun! Are you excited? I am!
Wellllllllllllll. . . . Not too many people reviewed. I know more people
must be reading this. Lazy people, you. I'm just kidding. Sometimes I
see a fic that has about three chapters and fifty reviews! Other times, I
see a fic with about ten chapters and long ones too, that has fifteen
reviews. I think my fic is pretty average. I'd say about half of the
people who read this review it; and I think that it could be better or it
could be worse. Look! I'm just rambling on and on. No one is probably
reading this anyway. The important author's note is at the end. Read that
one.
Disclaimer: Ok, Ok, I am the very proud owner of this chapter. I own pretty much none of the characters that you recognize, but I made up some people. YAY! Ok on with the story. . .
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In the Dictionary
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Chapter Seven: You Don't Know What You Do to Me.
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Lily regained consciousness about thirty minutes later. Hellen and Diana were still attending lessons, so she was all alone in her room. It took her a minute to figure out why she felt so awful. Then, it came back to her in full swing. She was a bit over the shock. She wasn't about to faint again, but she wasn't ready to accept it. She was just staring, blankly, into space.
James? she thought. Anyone but HIM. No, no, no! It can't be. . . That book is just another one of his pranks. . . if he thinks that he can mess with Lily Evans, he is sorely mistaken. . .
Ahhhhh. . . said that nasty voice in the back of her head. You were friends when he gave you that. He wouldn't play a trick on one of his friends. That was enough for Lily. She tried to force these thoughts out of her head by opening her Charms textbook and trying to teach herself how to do a Healing Charm. Being so talented at Charms, she quickly mastered it. It was still an hour before afternoon lessons were dismissed. This gave her time to plan what to say to Diana and Hellen when they returned. Hellen would know if Lily didn't want to talk about it, but Diana would interrogate her until she was satisfied.
Lily also could now think about what was going on between her and James. Right now, all she could feel towards him was hatred. Hatred for complicating her life; hatred for making her lose control of everything around her; and hatred for loving him without her brain's permission.
Lily was so caught up in her thoughts, she was surprised to find that she only had ten minutes before she could expect her peers to come back to Gryfinndor Tower to drop off their books. They would then all head down for dinner. Lily got out her bag of make-up and set to work. Within five minutes, a paler, more sickly Lily with sallow skin was looking out of the mirror at her. She had decided to tell Hellen and Diana that she was suffering from cramps and she had needed her rest.
Minutes later, Lily's best friends entered the dorm, their faces filled with concern. Diana was the first to speak.
"Where were you? You've been acting strangely all day. First you zone out, then you skive us off, next thing we know, you don't show up to any of the classes for the rest of the day."
Diana would have gone on, but Hellen silenced her with a look.
"Is something wrong? You hate having to make up work, so tell us what happened." Her face suddenly paled as a horrid thought popped into her head. "It doesn't have anything to do with You-Know-Who does it?" Hellen said this in a voice that was just above a whisper. She looked as if she expected him to barge through their door at the mere mention of his name.
Lily was amused by her friend's reactions and she let out a small giggle. "No, no, no. I'm afraid it was just a bad case of cramps. You know what I mean."
The other girls' mouths contracted to form a small "o".
"Not to be mean or anything, but Lily you really don't look too great. Why is this just happening now? You don't usually get them," said Diana.
"Who knows? I just wish they didn't have to happen on a school day. I absolutely hate doing extra work to catch up!" Lily then feigned a sharp pain in her abdominal area. "I'm feeling loads better though. I think I'll join you guys and come down for a little dinner."
Hellen and Diana nodded their heads and waited a short length of time for Lily to primp herself. No matter how sick she, supposedly, was, she would never allow herself to be seen with a flawed appearance. The three girls then walked to the Great Hall together. Hellen and Diana were fulfilling their duties as best friends and filling Lily in on all the gossip that she had missed. Nothing really big happened when Lily was out of action so that topic of conversation was short lived.
The girls wound up sitting next to a group of second year boys who were fawning over a Hufflepuff in the same year. Lily didn't catch the name but her father apparently owned the pub in Hogsmeade. They all were explaining what Hogsmeade was and how wonderful the pub was, to an obviously Muggle-born boy.
"Vince, just wait until we're third years and get to go there! It's ten times better than Diagon Alley even!" exclaimed one boy.
"It's wicked," added another friend of Vince.
"Wow! Are there many hags there?" asked Vince.
On the other side of the three friends was a group of sixth years who were discussing a much more serious matter.
"Have you heard anything about You-Know-Who lately?" asked a tall boy with dirty blonde hair and brown eyes.
"`es `rom `at I `ear, `e's ov'r by `Istol," commented a cubby boy with his mouth full of food.
"Anthony, we can't understand a word you are saying. Swallow your food and try again. Anyways, you sprayed food everywhere," ordered a nice- looking girl who was looking at Anthony with disdain, while picking pieces of steak and kidney pie out of her black hair.
Anthony did as he was told and moments later, he said, "I hear he's over Bristol."
The nice-looking girl then replied, "There. Now was that so hard?"
Anthony was just about to retort, when Diana said something that caught Lily's attention.
"Hey Lily? What do you want to do once we graduate Hogwarts?"
She moaned, "I don't even want to think about that for another two months."
"You must have some idea," said Hellen.
"Two months. Please just give me those two more months of bliss."
Diana opened her mouth to say something, but Lily cut her off. "Don't make me get down on my knees and beg. That sixth year by us was spraying food and I don't particularly fancy kneeling in steak and kidney pie."
The friends laughed at this and Lily seemed to be back to her normal self. Lily had mastered the art of prevaricating. She appeared to be her normal, happy self. Inside, however, she was hurting like never before. Her brain was aching from her very confused thoughts. Her torso hurt from lying unconscious in a strange position. But those things weren't what was bothering her- for some odd reason her heart hurt.
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Lily was lucky that she only missed Charms. As it turned out, they had learned the Cooling Charm, which Lily had already taught herself. She felt as though it wouldn't hurt for her to get another book on the subject from the library. Without realizing it, she was walking towards the spot where she and James had last been in contact with each other.
She stopped as she passed by the exact spot. It sent chills up her spine to think about it- the chills were not unpleasant, however. Was it only last night? A lot could change in a matter of moments. She lost herself in a reverie of that kiss. Distant footsteps brought her out of it and she felt a bit ashamed. She shouldn't have enjoyed anything about last night. Lily quickly fled from the spot and went on to the library. Once there, she discovered it was useless to try and study now.
Lily was almost to the portrait of the Fat Lady when she ran into the person she least wanted to see at the moment-James.
"James!" she cried out in surprise. He was looking very preoccupied; it didn't dimish anything from his good looks that he had acquired over the summer.
"Lily, I've been looking for you everywhere!" His tone suggested that he had intended to find me, but he was not looking forward to it.
"Why?" She didn't see any reason for them to have a conversation.
"I think we need to talk." James motioned for Lily to follow him, and set off towards a deserted corridor. They walked at a fast pace, down paths that Lily wasn't even sure Filch knew about. James obviously didn't want to be disturbed. He stopped at an alcove in the wall. There weren't even any rooms off of this passageway, hence no reason for anyone to be down there. Lily was about to ask James where he had found this area, but thought better of it.
James was the first to speak when they were sure that they wouldn't be overheard.
"I know last night affected you." He spoke calmly, in a would-be-calm type of voice. Lily didn't know why, but his tone unnerved her.
"What gives you that idea?" she defiantly asked. If she had to have a confrontation with James, she might as well put up a good fight and not be some weak little girl.
James let out a hallow laugh, "You never miss classes. I know it's not a direct result from last night, but I want to know what is."
"I don't think that it's any of your business." Lily was not in the mood to play games with James.
"Well I think that it is," said James, mocking Lily's tone.
That was it for Lily. She snapped and showed off her redheaded temper. "James, I really don't need this! What makes you think that you can just walk into my life and shift it off course? You do nice things for me like giving me that dictionary, and I love you for that. Then, you steal the attention that I deserve, and I a hate you for that. Then, you pull something like you did in the hallway. I hate you for not giving me a choice, then I hate you even more when I realize that what you did was what I really wanted in the first place." Her green eyes flashed menacingly. They held a fire that James had never seen before. It frightened him. "I've never felt more like I belonged than when I was in your arms; and I hate you for that! I hate you for doing this to me!
"Why did you have to choose me to play your horrid mind games with? What's the problem with one of the many girls who would gladly do this," Lily saw the outraged look on James' face, but still, she continued her tirade. "Oh yes, I know about that. Not much goes on that I don't know about. You say that we have a special connection, yet when you kiss me, you have forgotten to end your current relationship with a certain Ravenclaw. Don't deny it. She was still hanging on you all through breakfast."
James was about to open his mouth, before Lily cut him off, "What can you possibly say? What I said was pure truth. There's no denying it."
James was turning red from fury. Lily's last comment had only made him angrier. His eyes where showing a look, a look that was new. He had not even looked this way at Snape, not even when he had almost gotten his friends and him expelled last year. "You know what Lily? If you weren't so self-centered, you would realize you aren't suffering the most here. You bring out the worst in me. You play like you want me, then you turn around and avoid me as if I'm a leper. Sometimes I don't know what it is the whole world sees in you to consider you so special. Then there are times when I wonder why I'm lucky enough to have you near me- if not to touch, then to admire.
"What did I ever do to you? I never did anything to make you hate me. I didn't even know that you hated me until tonight. I could understand you hating me for kissing you, but you said that you wanted that. Why are you so afraid of me? Every time I try to talk to you, you either run away or turn it all into a big joke. Why, Lily, why?" James waited for a response, but Lily gave none. This made James's temper rise again. "What is wrong with you? Stop acting like you are so much better than me! I know you Lily Evans," he spat out the name as if it was poison, "you are no better than me. You won't ever become happy with the way you want to live your life. You'll go off and become a prize trophy wife; a very many suitors will be after you, for you are exceptionally beautiful. You will marry the richest one of them all, but you will refuse to have children; it may ruin your youthful figure. But then, you will get older, you'll do all that you can to prevent it, but it's inevitable. Your rich husband will either go off and find a mistress or divorce you. Then, you will be all alone; you have had no children. You will be broke, since your rich husband has cleverly taken all of your inheritance. Nobody will want you, for what is an aged beauty without even a penny to her name?"
"Don't. You. Dare. Tell. Me. How. I. Am. Going. To. Live. My. Life," Lily said this with gritted teeth. She then pulled herself to her full height, it was only a mere 5'6", but her posture made it seem as if she was 6'9". "You know nothing about me! What is your life going to amount to? You will stupidly go off fighting Voldemort and get yourself killed. Your goal of dying a hero's death will not be fulfilled, though. Everyone will just look at your memory with a sense of regret. 'This man could have done so much more for our cause, had he not gone off and taken a suicide mission. If only he had listened to wiser heads,' is what people will say about you!" Lily had never been this angry before.
"Why are we fighting like this, Lily? Why?" James said this in an almost remorseful voice. The look on his face was too much for Lily. It was a mixture of regret, a bit of anger and something else. It was the something else that got to Lily. She knew what it was- she just didn't want to admit it to herself.
"You made me love you James." With that, Lily collapsed in James's arms and broke down, crying. "I hate you, James. . . Damn you. . . I hate you. . . Hate you. . . . Hate you. . . Hate you. . ."
James was near tears as well, "Why Lily?. . . Why?. . . Why?. . . Why?. . ."
It took five minutes of crying for Lily to realize that James was still there. He was still there, even after she had said so many awful things.
"Oh, James, I never meant any of the things I said. You know that, don't you?"
"I know, I know. I don't know what came over me. . . Are things okay between us now?"
"Things can't be the same James. Not with you being you and me being me," Lily then started a new round of crying. James was doing his best to soothe her by rubbing her back and saying kind things to her. Lily was surprised at how safe she felt at the moment. James's muscular build was more than sufficient to engulf Lily. She just burrowed her head, deeper into his chest, she knew she had to have been drenching his robes with her tears, but he didn't seem to mind. The world could have been coming to an end at that very moment, but neither of them could have possibly been at all worried.
Through her tears, Lily smiled as the fact of how strange this would look to someone who was passing by. Lily, who never showed emotion, was bawling like a baby, and James, who was rarely ever seen alone with Lily, was holding her up in his arms.
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A/n: Wow! I got really into this chapter. I really am about to cry right now. Maybe it only works for me because I wrote it and all that good stuff. I think that it has to be one of my best, so far. What do you think? This is kind of an experiment with Microsoft Word. I have no idea how to use it.
Does this chapter make up for the last one? I was really surprised at how short it was! Shame on me! I feel really bad about that. Really, really bad. I'm soooooooo sorry.
Thanks to everyone who has reviewed. I really put too much feeling into this chapter to not get tons of reviews for it! That sounds really bad, I know, but I need them. They are food for my creative soul. By the way, this fic is not over yet! I have loads more to say!
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Disclaimer: Ok, Ok, I am the very proud owner of this chapter. I own pretty much none of the characters that you recognize, but I made up some people. YAY! Ok on with the story. . .
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In the Dictionary
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* ~*~*~*~
Chapter Seven: You Don't Know What You Do to Me.
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Lily regained consciousness about thirty minutes later. Hellen and Diana were still attending lessons, so she was all alone in her room. It took her a minute to figure out why she felt so awful. Then, it came back to her in full swing. She was a bit over the shock. She wasn't about to faint again, but she wasn't ready to accept it. She was just staring, blankly, into space.
James? she thought. Anyone but HIM. No, no, no! It can't be. . . That book is just another one of his pranks. . . if he thinks that he can mess with Lily Evans, he is sorely mistaken. . .
Ahhhhh. . . said that nasty voice in the back of her head. You were friends when he gave you that. He wouldn't play a trick on one of his friends. That was enough for Lily. She tried to force these thoughts out of her head by opening her Charms textbook and trying to teach herself how to do a Healing Charm. Being so talented at Charms, she quickly mastered it. It was still an hour before afternoon lessons were dismissed. This gave her time to plan what to say to Diana and Hellen when they returned. Hellen would know if Lily didn't want to talk about it, but Diana would interrogate her until she was satisfied.
Lily also could now think about what was going on between her and James. Right now, all she could feel towards him was hatred. Hatred for complicating her life; hatred for making her lose control of everything around her; and hatred for loving him without her brain's permission.
Lily was so caught up in her thoughts, she was surprised to find that she only had ten minutes before she could expect her peers to come back to Gryfinndor Tower to drop off their books. They would then all head down for dinner. Lily got out her bag of make-up and set to work. Within five minutes, a paler, more sickly Lily with sallow skin was looking out of the mirror at her. She had decided to tell Hellen and Diana that she was suffering from cramps and she had needed her rest.
Minutes later, Lily's best friends entered the dorm, their faces filled with concern. Diana was the first to speak.
"Where were you? You've been acting strangely all day. First you zone out, then you skive us off, next thing we know, you don't show up to any of the classes for the rest of the day."
Diana would have gone on, but Hellen silenced her with a look.
"Is something wrong? You hate having to make up work, so tell us what happened." Her face suddenly paled as a horrid thought popped into her head. "It doesn't have anything to do with You-Know-Who does it?" Hellen said this in a voice that was just above a whisper. She looked as if she expected him to barge through their door at the mere mention of his name.
Lily was amused by her friend's reactions and she let out a small giggle. "No, no, no. I'm afraid it was just a bad case of cramps. You know what I mean."
The other girls' mouths contracted to form a small "o".
"Not to be mean or anything, but Lily you really don't look too great. Why is this just happening now? You don't usually get them," said Diana.
"Who knows? I just wish they didn't have to happen on a school day. I absolutely hate doing extra work to catch up!" Lily then feigned a sharp pain in her abdominal area. "I'm feeling loads better though. I think I'll join you guys and come down for a little dinner."
Hellen and Diana nodded their heads and waited a short length of time for Lily to primp herself. No matter how sick she, supposedly, was, she would never allow herself to be seen with a flawed appearance. The three girls then walked to the Great Hall together. Hellen and Diana were fulfilling their duties as best friends and filling Lily in on all the gossip that she had missed. Nothing really big happened when Lily was out of action so that topic of conversation was short lived.
The girls wound up sitting next to a group of second year boys who were fawning over a Hufflepuff in the same year. Lily didn't catch the name but her father apparently owned the pub in Hogsmeade. They all were explaining what Hogsmeade was and how wonderful the pub was, to an obviously Muggle-born boy.
"Vince, just wait until we're third years and get to go there! It's ten times better than Diagon Alley even!" exclaimed one boy.
"It's wicked," added another friend of Vince.
"Wow! Are there many hags there?" asked Vince.
On the other side of the three friends was a group of sixth years who were discussing a much more serious matter.
"Have you heard anything about You-Know-Who lately?" asked a tall boy with dirty blonde hair and brown eyes.
"`es `rom `at I `ear, `e's ov'r by `Istol," commented a cubby boy with his mouth full of food.
"Anthony, we can't understand a word you are saying. Swallow your food and try again. Anyways, you sprayed food everywhere," ordered a nice- looking girl who was looking at Anthony with disdain, while picking pieces of steak and kidney pie out of her black hair.
Anthony did as he was told and moments later, he said, "I hear he's over Bristol."
The nice-looking girl then replied, "There. Now was that so hard?"
Anthony was just about to retort, when Diana said something that caught Lily's attention.
"Hey Lily? What do you want to do once we graduate Hogwarts?"
She moaned, "I don't even want to think about that for another two months."
"You must have some idea," said Hellen.
"Two months. Please just give me those two more months of bliss."
Diana opened her mouth to say something, but Lily cut her off. "Don't make me get down on my knees and beg. That sixth year by us was spraying food and I don't particularly fancy kneeling in steak and kidney pie."
The friends laughed at this and Lily seemed to be back to her normal self. Lily had mastered the art of prevaricating. She appeared to be her normal, happy self. Inside, however, she was hurting like never before. Her brain was aching from her very confused thoughts. Her torso hurt from lying unconscious in a strange position. But those things weren't what was bothering her- for some odd reason her heart hurt.
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Lily was lucky that she only missed Charms. As it turned out, they had learned the Cooling Charm, which Lily had already taught herself. She felt as though it wouldn't hurt for her to get another book on the subject from the library. Without realizing it, she was walking towards the spot where she and James had last been in contact with each other.
She stopped as she passed by the exact spot. It sent chills up her spine to think about it- the chills were not unpleasant, however. Was it only last night? A lot could change in a matter of moments. She lost herself in a reverie of that kiss. Distant footsteps brought her out of it and she felt a bit ashamed. She shouldn't have enjoyed anything about last night. Lily quickly fled from the spot and went on to the library. Once there, she discovered it was useless to try and study now.
Lily was almost to the portrait of the Fat Lady when she ran into the person she least wanted to see at the moment-James.
"James!" she cried out in surprise. He was looking very preoccupied; it didn't dimish anything from his good looks that he had acquired over the summer.
"Lily, I've been looking for you everywhere!" His tone suggested that he had intended to find me, but he was not looking forward to it.
"Why?" She didn't see any reason for them to have a conversation.
"I think we need to talk." James motioned for Lily to follow him, and set off towards a deserted corridor. They walked at a fast pace, down paths that Lily wasn't even sure Filch knew about. James obviously didn't want to be disturbed. He stopped at an alcove in the wall. There weren't even any rooms off of this passageway, hence no reason for anyone to be down there. Lily was about to ask James where he had found this area, but thought better of it.
James was the first to speak when they were sure that they wouldn't be overheard.
"I know last night affected you." He spoke calmly, in a would-be-calm type of voice. Lily didn't know why, but his tone unnerved her.
"What gives you that idea?" she defiantly asked. If she had to have a confrontation with James, she might as well put up a good fight and not be some weak little girl.
James let out a hallow laugh, "You never miss classes. I know it's not a direct result from last night, but I want to know what is."
"I don't think that it's any of your business." Lily was not in the mood to play games with James.
"Well I think that it is," said James, mocking Lily's tone.
That was it for Lily. She snapped and showed off her redheaded temper. "James, I really don't need this! What makes you think that you can just walk into my life and shift it off course? You do nice things for me like giving me that dictionary, and I love you for that. Then, you steal the attention that I deserve, and I a hate you for that. Then, you pull something like you did in the hallway. I hate you for not giving me a choice, then I hate you even more when I realize that what you did was what I really wanted in the first place." Her green eyes flashed menacingly. They held a fire that James had never seen before. It frightened him. "I've never felt more like I belonged than when I was in your arms; and I hate you for that! I hate you for doing this to me!
"Why did you have to choose me to play your horrid mind games with? What's the problem with one of the many girls who would gladly do this," Lily saw the outraged look on James' face, but still, she continued her tirade. "Oh yes, I know about that. Not much goes on that I don't know about. You say that we have a special connection, yet when you kiss me, you have forgotten to end your current relationship with a certain Ravenclaw. Don't deny it. She was still hanging on you all through breakfast."
James was about to open his mouth, before Lily cut him off, "What can you possibly say? What I said was pure truth. There's no denying it."
James was turning red from fury. Lily's last comment had only made him angrier. His eyes where showing a look, a look that was new. He had not even looked this way at Snape, not even when he had almost gotten his friends and him expelled last year. "You know what Lily? If you weren't so self-centered, you would realize you aren't suffering the most here. You bring out the worst in me. You play like you want me, then you turn around and avoid me as if I'm a leper. Sometimes I don't know what it is the whole world sees in you to consider you so special. Then there are times when I wonder why I'm lucky enough to have you near me- if not to touch, then to admire.
"What did I ever do to you? I never did anything to make you hate me. I didn't even know that you hated me until tonight. I could understand you hating me for kissing you, but you said that you wanted that. Why are you so afraid of me? Every time I try to talk to you, you either run away or turn it all into a big joke. Why, Lily, why?" James waited for a response, but Lily gave none. This made James's temper rise again. "What is wrong with you? Stop acting like you are so much better than me! I know you Lily Evans," he spat out the name as if it was poison, "you are no better than me. You won't ever become happy with the way you want to live your life. You'll go off and become a prize trophy wife; a very many suitors will be after you, for you are exceptionally beautiful. You will marry the richest one of them all, but you will refuse to have children; it may ruin your youthful figure. But then, you will get older, you'll do all that you can to prevent it, but it's inevitable. Your rich husband will either go off and find a mistress or divorce you. Then, you will be all alone; you have had no children. You will be broke, since your rich husband has cleverly taken all of your inheritance. Nobody will want you, for what is an aged beauty without even a penny to her name?"
"Don't. You. Dare. Tell. Me. How. I. Am. Going. To. Live. My. Life," Lily said this with gritted teeth. She then pulled herself to her full height, it was only a mere 5'6", but her posture made it seem as if she was 6'9". "You know nothing about me! What is your life going to amount to? You will stupidly go off fighting Voldemort and get yourself killed. Your goal of dying a hero's death will not be fulfilled, though. Everyone will just look at your memory with a sense of regret. 'This man could have done so much more for our cause, had he not gone off and taken a suicide mission. If only he had listened to wiser heads,' is what people will say about you!" Lily had never been this angry before.
"Why are we fighting like this, Lily? Why?" James said this in an almost remorseful voice. The look on his face was too much for Lily. It was a mixture of regret, a bit of anger and something else. It was the something else that got to Lily. She knew what it was- she just didn't want to admit it to herself.
"You made me love you James." With that, Lily collapsed in James's arms and broke down, crying. "I hate you, James. . . Damn you. . . I hate you. . . Hate you. . . . Hate you. . . Hate you. . ."
James was near tears as well, "Why Lily?. . . Why?. . . Why?. . . Why?. . ."
It took five minutes of crying for Lily to realize that James was still there. He was still there, even after she had said so many awful things.
"Oh, James, I never meant any of the things I said. You know that, don't you?"
"I know, I know. I don't know what came over me. . . Are things okay between us now?"
"Things can't be the same James. Not with you being you and me being me," Lily then started a new round of crying. James was doing his best to soothe her by rubbing her back and saying kind things to her. Lily was surprised at how safe she felt at the moment. James's muscular build was more than sufficient to engulf Lily. She just burrowed her head, deeper into his chest, she knew she had to have been drenching his robes with her tears, but he didn't seem to mind. The world could have been coming to an end at that very moment, but neither of them could have possibly been at all worried.
Through her tears, Lily smiled as the fact of how strange this would look to someone who was passing by. Lily, who never showed emotion, was bawling like a baby, and James, who was rarely ever seen alone with Lily, was holding her up in his arms.
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A/n: Wow! I got really into this chapter. I really am about to cry right now. Maybe it only works for me because I wrote it and all that good stuff. I think that it has to be one of my best, so far. What do you think? This is kind of an experiment with Microsoft Word. I have no idea how to use it.
Does this chapter make up for the last one? I was really surprised at how short it was! Shame on me! I feel really bad about that. Really, really bad. I'm soooooooo sorry.
Thanks to everyone who has reviewed. I really put too much feeling into this chapter to not get tons of reviews for it! That sounds really bad, I know, but I need them. They are food for my creative soul. By the way, this fic is not over yet! I have loads more to say!
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