Hi all! I'm completely bored, so I've started the 'what to do' series.
Hope you find it funny.
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What to do when Grandma is after you with a carving knife for nicking her chocolate cake
1. Scream, pretty easy.
2. Run away, standing waiting to be chopped up isn't too clever.
3. Don't think she can't hurt you, just ask Lucille how she died....
4. Hide behind Scott, he's taller than her, so what if he gets chopped up?
5. Leap inside the piano, Virgil wouldn't let her hurt the piano.
6. Apologise, don't blame me if you don't get a chance to say anything.
What NOT to do when Grandma is after you with a carving knife for nicking her chocolate cake.
1. Try and make a compromise.
2. Be sensible at all.
3. Try to bribe her.
4. Ask Jeff for help, he's scared of her, too.
5. Hide behind Alan, he's about five inches shorter than you.
What to do when you crash TB 2.
1. Commit suicide, Virgil will do it for you when he finds out, anyway.
2. Hide, someplace good, like in the top leaves of a hundred foot tree, not anywhere stupid, like in a bush, Virgil was champion hide-and-seeker once, you know.
3. Blame it on whoever is with you in Thunderbird 2, like Alan, everyone knows he can't fly.
4. Cry, people says it don't do no good, but if you look sweet, then he might only remove and arm.
5. Pray, only God can help you now.
What NOT to do when you crash TB 2.
1. Pretend it never happened, Virg might noticed the missing wings and the crumpled nose (that's Thunderbird 2, not you)
2. Plead, Virgil is deaf when he's angry.
3. Whine, again, he can't hear you.
4. Run, he'll find you, even if it kills him.
What to do when TB 1's engines fail while you are flying.
1. Die.
What NOT to do when TB 1's engines fail while you are flying.
1. Think you are going to live, no ejector seat, just Jeff's stupid advice to pull your nose up.
What to do when Jeff, Grandma, Brains, Tin-Tin and Kyrano go out.
1. Leave the island, the boys will manage to burn it down, or Alan will find a big plug, say 'ooooh, wonder what this does....' pulls it out, and the whole island sinks.
What NOT to do when Jeff, Grandma, Brains, Tin-Tin and Kyrano go out.
2. Stay at the island.
What to say when Alan flies TB 1.
1. 'Oh fuck.......'
What NOT to say when Alan flies TB 1.
1. Anything longer than 'Oh fuck.....' Alan will be distracted and your death will be earlier.
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Thanks! r&r, and I'll write some more.
Hope you find it funny.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What to do when Grandma is after you with a carving knife for nicking her chocolate cake
1. Scream, pretty easy.
2. Run away, standing waiting to be chopped up isn't too clever.
3. Don't think she can't hurt you, just ask Lucille how she died....
4. Hide behind Scott, he's taller than her, so what if he gets chopped up?
5. Leap inside the piano, Virgil wouldn't let her hurt the piano.
6. Apologise, don't blame me if you don't get a chance to say anything.
What NOT to do when Grandma is after you with a carving knife for nicking her chocolate cake.
1. Try and make a compromise.
2. Be sensible at all.
3. Try to bribe her.
4. Ask Jeff for help, he's scared of her, too.
5. Hide behind Alan, he's about five inches shorter than you.
What to do when you crash TB 2.
1. Commit suicide, Virgil will do it for you when he finds out, anyway.
2. Hide, someplace good, like in the top leaves of a hundred foot tree, not anywhere stupid, like in a bush, Virgil was champion hide-and-seeker once, you know.
3. Blame it on whoever is with you in Thunderbird 2, like Alan, everyone knows he can't fly.
4. Cry, people says it don't do no good, but if you look sweet, then he might only remove and arm.
5. Pray, only God can help you now.
What NOT to do when you crash TB 2.
1. Pretend it never happened, Virg might noticed the missing wings and the crumpled nose (that's Thunderbird 2, not you)
2. Plead, Virgil is deaf when he's angry.
3. Whine, again, he can't hear you.
4. Run, he'll find you, even if it kills him.
What to do when TB 1's engines fail while you are flying.
1. Die.
What NOT to do when TB 1's engines fail while you are flying.
1. Think you are going to live, no ejector seat, just Jeff's stupid advice to pull your nose up.
What to do when Jeff, Grandma, Brains, Tin-Tin and Kyrano go out.
1. Leave the island, the boys will manage to burn it down, or Alan will find a big plug, say 'ooooh, wonder what this does....' pulls it out, and the whole island sinks.
What NOT to do when Jeff, Grandma, Brains, Tin-Tin and Kyrano go out.
2. Stay at the island.
What to say when Alan flies TB 1.
1. 'Oh fuck.......'
What NOT to say when Alan flies TB 1.
1. Anything longer than 'Oh fuck.....' Alan will be distracted and your death will be earlier.
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Thanks! r&r, and I'll write some more.