Thanx to everyone who reviewed! They mean so much to me!
Wow, it's three months since I last updated, oops.
And thanks for the ideas! I've used one of them for, a starter for my section for them, keep 'em coming, without you, I can't do them!
I've added two new sections, one for reader's requests, and one for translations, hope you enjoy!
Phoenix
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What to do if someone gets in the way when you are flying Thunderbird 1
1. Well, I wonder what THAT button does? *presses button* *loud explosion* *a second later, every other plane in a twenty-six mile radius is dead.
2. Stick a large sign out of the window saying *MOVE YOU BASTARDS!* in big letters.
3. Yell at them using the loudspeaker.
What NOT to do if someone gets in the way when you are flying Thunderbird 1
1. Yell at them without the loudspeaker, what's the point yelling yourself hoarse at nothing whatsoever? They can't hear you.
2. Ask them politely with the loudspeaker to move, I mean, where's the fun in that? Yeah, you don't get arrested, but there's no fun.
What to do if you hear that there is an axe murderer somewhere in town.
1. Make sure you stick Alan outside where the axe murderer is most likely to go.
2. Go and help the axe murderer, the planet is way too overpopulated, anyway.
3. Sigh and go and kill him with the biggest gun you can find, you still get to kill someone, even if you don't get to commit major extermination.
What NOT to do if you hear there is an axe murderer somewhere in town.
1. Get in his way. Nuff said.
2. Hide away WITH Alan, what's the point in that? I mean, there, in front of you, is the perfect chance to get rid of Alan without getting arrested!
What to do if you find out that Tin-Tin is two-timing Alan.
1. Think about it for a while, then tell Alan, I mean, you're annoying Tin-Tin, but you get to hurt Alan!
2. Kill Alan, yeah, I know it has nothing to do with it, but killing Alan is always a good thing.
What NOT to do if you find out Tin-Tin is two-timing Alan.
1. Keep it to yourself, you are not hurting Alan, in the future, this may be a cause for mental breakdown.
READER'S REQUESTS!!!!
Submitted by: cyberwulf
What to do if you crash the Rolls Royce.
1. You may well be dead by now, so, I can't help.
2. Watch out for Parker, he's an ex-con, buy some Parker repellant. (Sold only in the US)
3. Cry.
What NOT to do if you crash the Rolls Royce.
1. Hide, as I said earlier, Parker is an ex-con, he can open safes, he can find someone hiding in bushes (if you hire a man in a big 'moneybag' suit, perhaps you have a chance.)
TRANSLATIONS
Note: I do not like Alan, I apologise for any annoyance, inconvenience, bother, fuss, distress or any other form of harassment provoked by this element, anyone who repudiates this statement may perish, or, I will, of course, be open for any annoyances, inconveniences, bothers, fusses, distresses or any other form of harassments from you.
Another note: I will now translate for my last paragraph: If I ever met Alan, I would say 'I trust you would not take if offensively if I told you to sod off and die' anyone who disagrees can either sod off and die or report their inconvenience to me.
A note for Charon: I would have no trouble driving a tank, I am well aware of how to drive one, since I studied them in great detail.
Another note for Charon: I also enjoy taking the piss out of Alan
Thank you.
1.
Alan: Dad! Can I fly Thunderbird 1?
Translation:
Alan: Dad! Can I commit suicide?
2.
Scott: Right, Virg and Gordo, go down and check out the situation, I will evaluate it from Mobile control.
Translation:
Scott: You go and get killed while I sit on my ass in Mobile control yelling at you.
3.
Virgil: I understand.
Translation:
Virgil: I have no idea what you are talking about.
4.
Gordon: It's okay, Alan can go with Virg.
Translation:
Gordon: Alan can go, but I will clobber him when he get's back.
5.
John: This is International Rescue, how may I help?
Translation:
John: This is International Rescue, fuck off and die, I am trying to sleep, do you realise I never get a moments peace?
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Alright, now, whadda think? I know, I know, bad, but hey! Nobody reads anyway!
Disclaimer: I did not intend to offend anyone whatsoever. (Yeah, right!)
Phoenix
---x---
Wow, it's three months since I last updated, oops.
And thanks for the ideas! I've used one of them for, a starter for my section for them, keep 'em coming, without you, I can't do them!
I've added two new sections, one for reader's requests, and one for translations, hope you enjoy!
Phoenix
---x---
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
What to do if someone gets in the way when you are flying Thunderbird 1
1. Well, I wonder what THAT button does? *presses button* *loud explosion* *a second later, every other plane in a twenty-six mile radius is dead.
2. Stick a large sign out of the window saying *MOVE YOU BASTARDS!* in big letters.
3. Yell at them using the loudspeaker.
What NOT to do if someone gets in the way when you are flying Thunderbird 1
1. Yell at them without the loudspeaker, what's the point yelling yourself hoarse at nothing whatsoever? They can't hear you.
2. Ask them politely with the loudspeaker to move, I mean, where's the fun in that? Yeah, you don't get arrested, but there's no fun.
What to do if you hear that there is an axe murderer somewhere in town.
1. Make sure you stick Alan outside where the axe murderer is most likely to go.
2. Go and help the axe murderer, the planet is way too overpopulated, anyway.
3. Sigh and go and kill him with the biggest gun you can find, you still get to kill someone, even if you don't get to commit major extermination.
What NOT to do if you hear there is an axe murderer somewhere in town.
1. Get in his way. Nuff said.
2. Hide away WITH Alan, what's the point in that? I mean, there, in front of you, is the perfect chance to get rid of Alan without getting arrested!
What to do if you find out that Tin-Tin is two-timing Alan.
1. Think about it for a while, then tell Alan, I mean, you're annoying Tin-Tin, but you get to hurt Alan!
2. Kill Alan, yeah, I know it has nothing to do with it, but killing Alan is always a good thing.
What NOT to do if you find out Tin-Tin is two-timing Alan.
1. Keep it to yourself, you are not hurting Alan, in the future, this may be a cause for mental breakdown.
READER'S REQUESTS!!!!
Submitted by: cyberwulf
What to do if you crash the Rolls Royce.
1. You may well be dead by now, so, I can't help.
2. Watch out for Parker, he's an ex-con, buy some Parker repellant. (Sold only in the US)
3. Cry.
What NOT to do if you crash the Rolls Royce.
1. Hide, as I said earlier, Parker is an ex-con, he can open safes, he can find someone hiding in bushes (if you hire a man in a big 'moneybag' suit, perhaps you have a chance.)
TRANSLATIONS
Note: I do not like Alan, I apologise for any annoyance, inconvenience, bother, fuss, distress or any other form of harassment provoked by this element, anyone who repudiates this statement may perish, or, I will, of course, be open for any annoyances, inconveniences, bothers, fusses, distresses or any other form of harassments from you.
Another note: I will now translate for my last paragraph: If I ever met Alan, I would say 'I trust you would not take if offensively if I told you to sod off and die' anyone who disagrees can either sod off and die or report their inconvenience to me.
A note for Charon: I would have no trouble driving a tank, I am well aware of how to drive one, since I studied them in great detail.
Another note for Charon: I also enjoy taking the piss out of Alan
Thank you.
1.
Alan: Dad! Can I fly Thunderbird 1?
Translation:
Alan: Dad! Can I commit suicide?
2.
Scott: Right, Virg and Gordo, go down and check out the situation, I will evaluate it from Mobile control.
Translation:
Scott: You go and get killed while I sit on my ass in Mobile control yelling at you.
3.
Virgil: I understand.
Translation:
Virgil: I have no idea what you are talking about.
4.
Gordon: It's okay, Alan can go with Virg.
Translation:
Gordon: Alan can go, but I will clobber him when he get's back.
5.
John: This is International Rescue, how may I help?
Translation:
John: This is International Rescue, fuck off and die, I am trying to sleep, do you realise I never get a moments peace?
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Alright, now, whadda think? I know, I know, bad, but hey! Nobody reads anyway!
Disclaimer: I did not intend to offend anyone whatsoever. (Yeah, right!)
Phoenix
---x---