Amnesia

By Jo March

Disclaimer: See chapter one

Summary: Elrond decides to take a walk in the woods, and he receives a nasty knock on the head. This blow to the head results in serious amnesia. Will Elrond ever be able to remember? How will his family cope with this news?

Chapter Four: What is Wrong with Elladan?

"Well, how is your head?" Gandalf questioned Elrond, the silence was to drawn out, and Gandalf's voice sounded foreign to himself.

Elrond blinked. He had gotten use to the silence. "Well," he hated to admit that it was pounding, and was making him a bit dizzy in the meanwhile. "Yes, it hurts a little bit, but not much." Elrond tried not to wince as he spoke, but it was in vain, Gandalf picked up on the slightest movement. It pained him to see his friend suffer so.

"You have a headache don't you?" He gave Elrond a stern look. "Does it make you dizzy to focus on things?" Gandalf bent forward in his chair and stared into Elrond's eyes. Yes, the pupils were dilated more than normal; they did not recede, as they should. The Elven lord had a very sever concussion.

Well, he certainly goes straight to the point. Very honest and open, not one to hide anything. Why does he wish to know? Is it something serious? Elrond searched Gandalf's face for an answer, but had to quite shortly, for it was exceptionally painful to focus. "A slight one yes, but nothing I cannot handle." He tried to sit up, but the room seemed to spin. Elrond fell back to his bed.

"How are your children?" Gandalf wished to see if the Elven king could remember any single detail of his life. Even the smallest thing could be immensely helpful in regaining his former memories.

"There fine, I think." Is this a test? thought Elrond, what does he want of me? I cannot remember anything, not even my own name. "I did not remember them at all, so I cannot really judge if there was a difference or not."

"Hum," Gandalf's bushy eyebrows rose in a question like form. "You cannot remember a single detail of your life before the accident? Most unusual. What about your name, can you remember what they called you before now?"

Elrond looked down at the quilt covering him and his bed. He was trying as hard as he could to surface any memory that would come to mind. "No there's nothing. Not even my name. I cannot remember anything, not a single, simple detail.

"This is worse than I had thought", Gandalf muttered under his breath.

"What can we do to get my memory back?" asked Elrond, vulnerability in his voice. Gandalf couldn't think of a single thing he could do for Elrond.

He sounds scared. I've never seen him so vulnerable before. He had always been so strong, so royal, but not now. I wonder.... "There is one thing I could possibly do for you, but I must warn you that this could be potentially dangerous. It could result in serious damage to your brain."

"What are the odds it would work?" There was a hopefulness if Elrond that Gandalf could not ignore. So trusting, just like a small child who has lost his parent's and hoping to find them again, mused Gandalf.

"Not very high. This a great chance you could die from this."

"Is there any hope that it would work at all? If so, then get on with it." Elrond practically giddy, if you can imagine a great Elf lord giddy that is.

Gandalf's lips were drawn in a tight line across his face. "Your children should agree to this. If they refuse this offer to retrieve your memory then I shall not perform the procedure."

"I'll send for them later this evening. So, tell me about this 'procedure.' What risks does it involve? What is it exactly? How will it help me?" There was a smile on Elrond's face, something Gandalf had not seen since Celebrian had gone to Valinor.

Gandalf chuckled, "You are as curious as my young friend Frodo Baggins, Master Elrond. Well, I already told you that it is highly dangerous procedure. It involves selecting a part of your memory and subjecting it to an electric shock to help revive the memory cells. It could completely kill that section of your brain and you would never have use of it again. If, I say, if it works you will have that section of your memory usable again."

"Which section of my memory will I be getting back?" Elrond tilted his head upwards so he could better focus on Gandalf without becoming too dizzy.

"It depends on which section the brain I chose to work on. No one knows exactly were everything is located in the brain. I have a 50/50 chance of hitting your adult memory, or the memories you had when you were a child. There is no telling what part I might hit. Are you still willing to attempt it?"

"Yes I am." The danger and risk had only strengthened Elrond's resolve to go through with it. A little bit of memory was better than no memory at all. Even if he died it would be better than living without memory. I just hope those children say "yes" to Gandalf's proposal. I hope they will not be too sad if I do not make it. If I stayed around without memory, what kind of father would I be to them? I hope that this works. "Alright, please get the children it's time to tell them what we had decided upon.

Gandalf left to get the children and promised to come right back. Twenty minutes had passed and Elrond was getting impatient. When Gandalf finally returned he was leading Elladan, Elrohir, Arwen, and Aragorn. Elrond blinked, I was under the assumption that I only had three children. Wait, that one is not an Elf, who is he?

"Father, this is Estel. He our foster brother, you might not remember him though." Arwen smiled as she introduced the two. They stepped back, holding hands, their eye's radiated an unsurpassable love.

"Well, I suppose Gandalf has told you what we decided this afternoon. What is your verdict?" He gazed around the faces in the room, it was a grim moment for Elrond Peredhil.

"Well, as eldest, I think it is a wonderful opportunity, even if it does have sever risk," Elladan hoped that he sounded mature, he really did not though. Inside he was still a child, longing to be comforted by someone. He desperately wanted his father to proud of him.

"I think Elladan is right. You should be able to do anything you can to get your memory back. What about you Undómiel?" Elrohir looked over at his little sister. She was so happy with Estel by her side.

Arwen looked up at Aragorn and smiled. "We think it would be unfair to not give you the fullest chance at recovery."

"Well," said Gandalf, "It looks unanimous to me. Shall we proceed with the procedure?"

Elrond nodded his head yes. Gandalf picked up his staff and walked over to where Elrond was sitting in bed. He gently laid him down. He muttered a few words and Elrond fell into a deep sleep. His eyes closed, and Arwen gasped and turned away. Elrond's breathing stopped for a minute, then resumed and his eyes opened.

Gandalf ushered them out of the room. "We won't know till tomorrow when he awakes. There is still a possibility that he could pass away during the night. We can only hope and pray that he makes it though the night." He gently closed the door, and they were left to their own for the while.

"Elladan," Arwen called out to her brother as he was walking away. "Elladan, wait!" He just kept on walking, pretending not to hear the beckoning of Arwen. She let go of Aragorn's hand and ran to her brother. Aragorn looked to Elrohir to what he should do next. The younger twin just shook his head no, and walked off in the opposite direction. He was at a lose of what to do, so he finally decided to make his way to his room.

Arwen caught up with her brother. "Elladan, please tell me what is wrong. You are acting strange, what is the matter with you. You are not yourself." She grasped his arm.

"Let go!" He flung his arm back and hit his her squarely in the mouth. "You have no idea, you will never know. You're Father's favorite, you always have been. Nothing for you to worry about, you are the baby of the family," spat Elladan.

Arwen's eye's pooled with unspilt tears. Never had anyone dare hit her. What had made her brother act in such a way? Of course her father loved her, he loved them all very much. It pained her to hear Elladan speak in such a way. Arwen also noted that her brother referred to their father not as Ada or Atar, but as "Father". What had happened to the fun-loving Elf she had grown up with?

Elladan walked on, consumed in his own pain. As he reached his own door he slammed it shut with all the force he could muster. Anger overtook all common sense. No one understood the responsibility he had felt since their father had fallen ill. Once Elrond had told him if anything were to happen to him Elladan would be the one who would be in charge. He had also said he wished he would grow up and learn to act responsible, not like a child. Elladan had put these words far away from him as possible, but they now all came back in a rush. He desperately wanted for his father to approve of him.

As he sat down on his bed exhaustion swept over him. To long had he been in the wild without a proper bed. Those year's had taken their toll on him, if not physically, then mentally. Many year's his lust for vengeance had taken the number one spot in his heart, and hatred grew untamed. Oh yes, he was a brilliant actor, he could fool anyone even his father. They would never understand him, no one would. The elf slipped into a dreamlike state.

A ghastly figure approached him, Elladan drew his sword. Just as he swung the sword at the attacker a bright light shone that blinded him. He ducked the first blow that was intended for his head. Elladan jumped up, it was an Orc! He fought bravely and valiantly, but all in vain. The vile beast would not be conquered. It blocked each of his moves expertly, it was unscathed, yet he was quickly wearing down. Just as the finally attack came Elladan summoned up his strength and leaped over the Orc's head, and plunged his sword into its degraded belly. As the Orc fell Elladan saw that it was no Orc he had slew, but his mother.

He fell to her side crying, "Naneth! Naneth, can you hear me. Mother, it is I, Elladan, your son." He took her head in his lap, gently pushing back her hair from her face.

She looked up at her son, disbelief in her eyes. "No, you are not my son." Between each word she had to take a breath. Celebrian struggled for air, she cough, and as she did blood came out with the spittle. "My son would never do such a thing, even to an Orc, he would make its passing..." She gasped for breath. "Its passing easy, no suffering."

"Naneth, it is Elladan. I swear to you. It is I, your firstborn. It was a mistake, I did not realize it was you."

"You did not look." She closed her eyes and took her last breath. Elladan sat there, contemplating his mother's final words. "You did not look." What could they mean. He looked down at the still form of Celebrian, so peaceful. Tears coursed their way down his cheek, he rocked her dead body back and forth, crying as he had not since he was a child.

"My ionn, why do you cry?" Elladan felt a hand on his should. As he turned around, his mother's body disappeared.

Elladan gasped at what he saw before him, his mother alive. An ethereal sheen shone round her. "Naneth, but you... you died. I saw you. I.... How?"

"Elladan, do not always trust in what you see. Your hate blinded you. All you think of is your blood lust. Not only by the sword did you kill me, but also by your hatred. You have not only hurt me, but also the rest of our family. Return and remember, my ionn, nothing is as it seems. Do not be afraid to do what is right.

With that his mother disappeared, and Elladan awoke with a start. He looked down at his hands they were stained a dark crimson color, it was blood. How it had gotten there was beyond Elladan. As he stood before the wash basin a handprint on his cheek began to appear. Suddenly everything became clear. The blood on his hands was the blood of all the innocent people he had killed in his unwholesome slaughter, the handprint was when he had hit... Who had he hit? Oh no....! Arwen. He tore out of the room. He had to apologize, not just to her, but everyone.

A/N: Wow, this is quiet a bit different from the original. Hey, I got to go see the TTT for the third time today, yeah! It is still good. Hope August 5th gets here soon, then November 11. I can't wait! Thank you for the two new reviews. Glad you like it so far.