Disclaimer: A : a denial or disavowal of legal claim : relinquishment of or
formal refusal to accept an interest or estate B : a writing that embodies
a legal disclaimer.
With that said, please keep in mind that I do not own any part of the Metal Gear series, or any characters associated with the game. However, Bob the Technician is my own creation.
Author's Note: Ahem. I am a fish!!!! Well, I'm not really, I've just been wanting to say that for awhile. For Chapter 3 I'm going to be writing Otacon's explanation of the weaponry. After this, I may or may not jump ahead a bit. I'd love to know what the readers think. Would you like me to continue from the digital camera and go through the Russian's boarding the tanker? Do you want a scene or two of Snake avoiding the guards and cameras? Or would you rather I jump ahead to the battle with Olga? I'll leave it all up to you fans. Speaking of fans ::whispers of "Oh God, is he still talking?!":: .yeah, I've been getting some great reviews and I'm quite happy you are all enjoying this spoof. I'll try my best to uphold the level of quality so far, but it can be a little tough to come up with ideas all the time. Anyway, I'll stop wasting your time now.
Chapter 3: Otacon Makes Himself Useful.Depending On How You Look At It.Yeah
::It's the third day of filming for the cast and crew. On this morning everyone is in good spirits. Why you ask? Well, there are three reasons. First off, today's shooting is scheduled to be a short one. Secondly, a new shipment of doughnuts has found its way to the buffet table. And third, today is an actual downpour, instead of the tech guy who drinks WAY too much coffee.::
Raiden: Okay everyone, I want to start off quickly here. There's no use burning time on the set when we could be off enjoying life.
Snake: I'm not buying it. What're you up to today?
Raiden: The gals down at the salon have some really juicy gossip on Wednesday's.
Otacon: Girly-man.
Raiden: ::grumbles:: Mary-Sue!
::Snakes facial expression turns to one of complete and utter horror. Thinking quickly, Snake dives behind the buffet table, grabbing a jelly doughnut on the way. Bob the Technician clumsily crouches down behind Snake as the tension in the air builds between Otacon and the director, Raiden. It was to be the fight to end all fights! Cat fights that is.::
Otacon: You bitch! I'll give you the clawing of a lifetime
Raiden: Bring it on, mother lover!
Otacon: Mother-in-Law!
Raiden: It's still gross. Now die!
::The insults turn to girly blows as Raiden claws at Otacon. However, Emmerich blocks with his right arm. He then counters by flipping his lab coat tail up and whipping Raiden in the eyes. The VR Junkie stumbles backwards screaming obscenities, totally unprotected. Otacon leaps forward slamming into..Raiden's no-handed cartwheel.::
Raiden: Fooled you. Sissy mother lover!
::The doctor stumbles to his feet clutching his throbbing head in pain. He shakes his head about in every direction in an effort to dispel the severe case of double-vision.::
Otacon: I have a P.h.D in ass-kicking!
Snake: He's lying. Can we get back to the filming now?
Raiden: Yeah, I guess we should. Truce, Hal?
Otacon: Truce, Jack.
Raiden: Who's Jack?
Otacon: You are. That's your name, Jack. Jack is your name.
Raiden: That's the first I've heard of it. Hm.I have name. Sweet. Right, well anyway, let's set up people!
::Snake walks up behind cover of the metal and boxes while Otacon and Raiden clear the set. Otacon will be using a radio behind the cameras. All Codec transmissions are done by the Technicians later on. Snake crouches down, and the short tutorial begins.::
Otacon: Okay Snake, lets take a look at your gear. Your weapon is nude photos of Whoopy Goldberg to flash the guards with.
::Behind the scenes, Bob chokes down the remainder of his jelly doughnut in pure disgust, while Raiden vomits over the side of the tanker. He's too busy coughing up his own stomach acids to call cut, so he pulls a pair of scissors out of his skull suit and makes a snipping motion.::
Otacon: Heh heh heh.
Snake: Otacon, that's disgusting.
Otacon: Yeah, well everyone else gets to have fun around here. It was my turn.
Raiden: ::Splutters:: T-t-take two! Ac--::cough::--tion!
Otacon: .Your weapon is a converted Beretta M92F. It's a little tough to work with because you'll have to reload after each shot since the slide locks. Now, your gear. ::gasp!:: Snake, why are there naked photos of Mei Ling in your pocket?!
Snake: Um.I don't know?
::A silence fills the air as Otacon glares from the other end of the Codec transmission. Snake smiles sheepishly for a moment, hoping Otacon would let it go, but the continuing silence says otherwise.::
Snake: If you must know, I was testing the Stealth camouflage. As you can see, it passed with flying colours, and clothing.
Otacon: You know what? I'm not going to argue with you. Just know that I'm really disappointed in you. and do you have any copies that I can borrow?
::Meanwhile, behind the cameras.::
Bob: Shouldn't you have yelled "Cut!" about one minute ago?
Raiden: No. I'm going to let this continue. My theory is, Snake has many copies, and maybe I can have some.
Bob: That's a good theory.
::And now, in front of the cameras.::
Otacon: Cigarettes, Snake?
Snake: They're kind of a lucky charm.
Otacon: You obviously haven't read the Surgeon Generals warning, have you?
Snake: The Surgeon General can go screw a--
Raiden: CUT!! Let's continue from where Snake interrupted.ACTION!
Otacon: Next, your digital camera. You'll find it's almost the same as your old one.
Raiden: CUT! And that's a wrap. TO THE SALON!
Otacon: TO ELECTRONICS BOUTIQUE!
Snake: TO MEI LING'S APARTMENT!
::An un-nerving silence invades the tanker, and it seems as if the waves themselves have calmed down.::
Snake: Ahem. TO THE ARMY SURPLUS STORE!
::All aboard nod their collective heads in approval and the crew heads their separate ways.::
Author's Note: Well, I hope this chapter was to your liking. I'm already in the process of kicking around some ideas for further chapters. As I mentioned earlier though, I will leave the next chapter in the hands of my reviewers. I will write the scene you would like to see of the three choices above. Reviews are appreciated.
With that said, please keep in mind that I do not own any part of the Metal Gear series, or any characters associated with the game. However, Bob the Technician is my own creation.
Author's Note: Ahem. I am a fish!!!! Well, I'm not really, I've just been wanting to say that for awhile. For Chapter 3 I'm going to be writing Otacon's explanation of the weaponry. After this, I may or may not jump ahead a bit. I'd love to know what the readers think. Would you like me to continue from the digital camera and go through the Russian's boarding the tanker? Do you want a scene or two of Snake avoiding the guards and cameras? Or would you rather I jump ahead to the battle with Olga? I'll leave it all up to you fans. Speaking of fans ::whispers of "Oh God, is he still talking?!":: .yeah, I've been getting some great reviews and I'm quite happy you are all enjoying this spoof. I'll try my best to uphold the level of quality so far, but it can be a little tough to come up with ideas all the time. Anyway, I'll stop wasting your time now.
Chapter 3: Otacon Makes Himself Useful.Depending On How You Look At It.Yeah
::It's the third day of filming for the cast and crew. On this morning everyone is in good spirits. Why you ask? Well, there are three reasons. First off, today's shooting is scheduled to be a short one. Secondly, a new shipment of doughnuts has found its way to the buffet table. And third, today is an actual downpour, instead of the tech guy who drinks WAY too much coffee.::
Raiden: Okay everyone, I want to start off quickly here. There's no use burning time on the set when we could be off enjoying life.
Snake: I'm not buying it. What're you up to today?
Raiden: The gals down at the salon have some really juicy gossip on Wednesday's.
Otacon: Girly-man.
Raiden: ::grumbles:: Mary-Sue!
::Snakes facial expression turns to one of complete and utter horror. Thinking quickly, Snake dives behind the buffet table, grabbing a jelly doughnut on the way. Bob the Technician clumsily crouches down behind Snake as the tension in the air builds between Otacon and the director, Raiden. It was to be the fight to end all fights! Cat fights that is.::
Otacon: You bitch! I'll give you the clawing of a lifetime
Raiden: Bring it on, mother lover!
Otacon: Mother-in-Law!
Raiden: It's still gross. Now die!
::The insults turn to girly blows as Raiden claws at Otacon. However, Emmerich blocks with his right arm. He then counters by flipping his lab coat tail up and whipping Raiden in the eyes. The VR Junkie stumbles backwards screaming obscenities, totally unprotected. Otacon leaps forward slamming into..Raiden's no-handed cartwheel.::
Raiden: Fooled you. Sissy mother lover!
::The doctor stumbles to his feet clutching his throbbing head in pain. He shakes his head about in every direction in an effort to dispel the severe case of double-vision.::
Otacon: I have a P.h.D in ass-kicking!
Snake: He's lying. Can we get back to the filming now?
Raiden: Yeah, I guess we should. Truce, Hal?
Otacon: Truce, Jack.
Raiden: Who's Jack?
Otacon: You are. That's your name, Jack. Jack is your name.
Raiden: That's the first I've heard of it. Hm.I have name. Sweet. Right, well anyway, let's set up people!
::Snake walks up behind cover of the metal and boxes while Otacon and Raiden clear the set. Otacon will be using a radio behind the cameras. All Codec transmissions are done by the Technicians later on. Snake crouches down, and the short tutorial begins.::
Otacon: Okay Snake, lets take a look at your gear. Your weapon is nude photos of Whoopy Goldberg to flash the guards with.
::Behind the scenes, Bob chokes down the remainder of his jelly doughnut in pure disgust, while Raiden vomits over the side of the tanker. He's too busy coughing up his own stomach acids to call cut, so he pulls a pair of scissors out of his skull suit and makes a snipping motion.::
Otacon: Heh heh heh.
Snake: Otacon, that's disgusting.
Otacon: Yeah, well everyone else gets to have fun around here. It was my turn.
Raiden: ::Splutters:: T-t-take two! Ac--::cough::--tion!
Otacon: .Your weapon is a converted Beretta M92F. It's a little tough to work with because you'll have to reload after each shot since the slide locks. Now, your gear. ::gasp!:: Snake, why are there naked photos of Mei Ling in your pocket?!
Snake: Um.I don't know?
::A silence fills the air as Otacon glares from the other end of the Codec transmission. Snake smiles sheepishly for a moment, hoping Otacon would let it go, but the continuing silence says otherwise.::
Snake: If you must know, I was testing the Stealth camouflage. As you can see, it passed with flying colours, and clothing.
Otacon: You know what? I'm not going to argue with you. Just know that I'm really disappointed in you. and do you have any copies that I can borrow?
::Meanwhile, behind the cameras.::
Bob: Shouldn't you have yelled "Cut!" about one minute ago?
Raiden: No. I'm going to let this continue. My theory is, Snake has many copies, and maybe I can have some.
Bob: That's a good theory.
::And now, in front of the cameras.::
Otacon: Cigarettes, Snake?
Snake: They're kind of a lucky charm.
Otacon: You obviously haven't read the Surgeon Generals warning, have you?
Snake: The Surgeon General can go screw a--
Raiden: CUT!! Let's continue from where Snake interrupted.ACTION!
Otacon: Next, your digital camera. You'll find it's almost the same as your old one.
Raiden: CUT! And that's a wrap. TO THE SALON!
Otacon: TO ELECTRONICS BOUTIQUE!
Snake: TO MEI LING'S APARTMENT!
::An un-nerving silence invades the tanker, and it seems as if the waves themselves have calmed down.::
Snake: Ahem. TO THE ARMY SURPLUS STORE!
::All aboard nod their collective heads in approval and the crew heads their separate ways.::
Author's Note: Well, I hope this chapter was to your liking. I'm already in the process of kicking around some ideas for further chapters. As I mentioned earlier though, I will leave the next chapter in the hands of my reviewers. I will write the scene you would like to see of the three choices above. Reviews are appreciated.