I do not own Gundam Wing or any of the characters from that show,
(but we like to pretend don't we)
for your pleasure:
Pairings: 1x2x5 3x4 (although I don't even think they'll show up in this)
Rating: let's hope for NC-17 ne? But this parts still G
Multi-part!
Warning!!!!!!
There's YAOI in here, male on male relationships! Explicit Sex as a possibility, definite male threesomes, and the Characters doing all this Nasty Stuff are underage! You are warned, so don't say I didn't tell you.
As always, review like a crazy person!
Misery Loves
By Belleluna
PART THREE
Journal Entry by Duo Maxwell
Date: AC 196
Mood: philosophical
Music: Late 20th Century band, VAST
There's something I've always wondered about, my vast curiosity I suppose, but it's about Wufei, and his role.
I guess I should start from the beginning of that long train of thought, this is kinda hard to explain. We gundam pilots are heroes, of sorts. We were once at least. I suppose our status these days is nowhere near that significant, but still, the basic heroes. Now what is a hero?
A normal person would tell you: an honorable person, they must be strong, have courage, never give up, inspire hope, etc. They would describe an absolutely perfect person, that has all these abilities but still retains basic human compassion. That, sir, is impossible. How do I know, because I know five heroes. Speaking as one of them, what a hero is on the outside isn't always the truth.
How does one become hardened to hardship and pain, learn to withstand torture and anguish, learn to deal with basic human indignities such as rape and purposefully inflicted pain? The only way is to build up a tolerance, like with poisons. You have to expose yourself to each one as much as possible, numb yourself to the horror and pain of it, so that it doesn't affect you anymore.
I don't care what kind of hero your are, it is not possible to do these "heroic" things if you have not first inured yourself to these hardships. Even to learn combat is to put yourself through pain for gain. This was how they chose the pilots for the gundams. Who had learned most of the harsh lessons needed already, and who could withstand the need for more?
Slowly, through careful observation, I've discovered this. I already know myself. I was an orphan on the streets of L2. First my unknown family died, leaving me alone as a baby. I was raised by a gang of children and street toughs that never gave me a name, and befriended by Solo, my one friend. I lost him, and gained Maxwell church, which I eventually lost as well, but in the time it took me to find that kind priest, I had been raped 28 times, I counted each one.
When the priest and the nun died, it was back on the streets, and I used that experience, put it to use. That's why I'm a gundam pilot. I can lie, seduce, I am inured to the pain of rape or any sexual torture, I know how to play the john's, I'm good at crossdressing, and I've suffered so many losses that I can keep my cool through anything, making me great for moral.
I won't go into what Heero went through as a child, being my boyfriend I learned all about him from what he told me. But safe to say that after his parents died he was adopted by an assassin, who trained him as a young boy to kill, then he was taken in my that sadomasochistic insane bastard Dr. J. The "training" and physical alteration they put him through has made him the perfect fighter.
Heero is the machine, the leader, the indestructible, and he can withstand any pain, he was even trained out of emotions so even that torture could not effect him. Slowly though, we are trying to change at least that last part. (blush)
Quatre grew up in a corporate world, his father one of the riches men in the galaxy. He has been numbed to the social torture, the pressure of disapproving people and snubs that would send a street baby like me into hysterics. He bears all this coolly, and has developed such a brilliant strategic mind that is his role on our team, we hardly make a move without one of his brilliant plans.
Trowa has been alone his whole life, this has no effect on him. In situations where a normal human would go insane from the lack of company he is perfectly at home, and his mind rivals no other's. There's not a lot of information I can get from him, he's so quiet and still. But sometimes I think that he would be better at being the infiltration artist than me. He and Quatre deserve one another.
So now to my problem. I now realize that I know nothing about our teammate, Wufei. Chang Wufei, a clan name, Chinese I think. I've searched data bases, there is no information. I've gone through his things, stark as a hotel room. He volunteers no information about himself, he helps when necessary with missions and pesters at us other than that. But beyond that, he's so quiet he fades away, more so than myself or Trowa.
Until several nights ago I barely even remembered he was there, so unobtrusive was he at meetings. Then one night I was sent to fetch him for a meeting (that's me, little gopher) and he was meditating, a sudden peak into his life. And even more than that! His room was decorated like a dojo! More information.
Since then I've been keeping tabs on him, trying to be his friend, get him to say something, anything, but nothing. Heero's starting to get jealous, which, yes, is dangerous, but I can't help this obsession, I really need to know. What is Wufei's role on our team? What happened in his past to make him a hero?
******
Wufei peeked into Duo's room. "Duo?" The baka was gone again. He seemed to disappear exactly whenever they had an important meeting to hold. Ah well, he'd show up just in the nick of time, he usually does.
Wufei was about to leave when his sharp eyes caught his name on the computer screen. He turned, intrigued, and scrolled up to see what the document was about. A little surprised to find a journal entry, he guiltily read on.
He paused for a moment, "I shouldn't do this, this is a diary, a journal, it is not honorable," he paused again, "but Duo did leave it open like this, I can't help but read it."
That issue settle happily, he read on in wonder, as he discovered a deeper side to the gundam pilot he really didn't know that well. Duo was hardly a baka, and he had never realized any of these things about the people he worked with either. How unobservant he was!
He shut the laptop screen and carried the computer with him as he quickly left Duo's room. He needed to find Duo and speak with him about this. He would after the meeting, if that failed, after the mission. He would tell Duo his reason for being a hero, as shameful as it was.
*to be continued*
(but we like to pretend don't we)
for your pleasure:
Pairings: 1x2x5 3x4 (although I don't even think they'll show up in this)
Rating: let's hope for NC-17 ne? But this parts still G
Multi-part!
Warning!!!!!!
There's YAOI in here, male on male relationships! Explicit Sex as a possibility, definite male threesomes, and the Characters doing all this Nasty Stuff are underage! You are warned, so don't say I didn't tell you.
As always, review like a crazy person!
Misery Loves
By Belleluna
PART THREE
Journal Entry by Duo Maxwell
Date: AC 196
Mood: philosophical
Music: Late 20th Century band, VAST
There's something I've always wondered about, my vast curiosity I suppose, but it's about Wufei, and his role.
I guess I should start from the beginning of that long train of thought, this is kinda hard to explain. We gundam pilots are heroes, of sorts. We were once at least. I suppose our status these days is nowhere near that significant, but still, the basic heroes. Now what is a hero?
A normal person would tell you: an honorable person, they must be strong, have courage, never give up, inspire hope, etc. They would describe an absolutely perfect person, that has all these abilities but still retains basic human compassion. That, sir, is impossible. How do I know, because I know five heroes. Speaking as one of them, what a hero is on the outside isn't always the truth.
How does one become hardened to hardship and pain, learn to withstand torture and anguish, learn to deal with basic human indignities such as rape and purposefully inflicted pain? The only way is to build up a tolerance, like with poisons. You have to expose yourself to each one as much as possible, numb yourself to the horror and pain of it, so that it doesn't affect you anymore.
I don't care what kind of hero your are, it is not possible to do these "heroic" things if you have not first inured yourself to these hardships. Even to learn combat is to put yourself through pain for gain. This was how they chose the pilots for the gundams. Who had learned most of the harsh lessons needed already, and who could withstand the need for more?
Slowly, through careful observation, I've discovered this. I already know myself. I was an orphan on the streets of L2. First my unknown family died, leaving me alone as a baby. I was raised by a gang of children and street toughs that never gave me a name, and befriended by Solo, my one friend. I lost him, and gained Maxwell church, which I eventually lost as well, but in the time it took me to find that kind priest, I had been raped 28 times, I counted each one.
When the priest and the nun died, it was back on the streets, and I used that experience, put it to use. That's why I'm a gundam pilot. I can lie, seduce, I am inured to the pain of rape or any sexual torture, I know how to play the john's, I'm good at crossdressing, and I've suffered so many losses that I can keep my cool through anything, making me great for moral.
I won't go into what Heero went through as a child, being my boyfriend I learned all about him from what he told me. But safe to say that after his parents died he was adopted by an assassin, who trained him as a young boy to kill, then he was taken in my that sadomasochistic insane bastard Dr. J. The "training" and physical alteration they put him through has made him the perfect fighter.
Heero is the machine, the leader, the indestructible, and he can withstand any pain, he was even trained out of emotions so even that torture could not effect him. Slowly though, we are trying to change at least that last part. (blush)
Quatre grew up in a corporate world, his father one of the riches men in the galaxy. He has been numbed to the social torture, the pressure of disapproving people and snubs that would send a street baby like me into hysterics. He bears all this coolly, and has developed such a brilliant strategic mind that is his role on our team, we hardly make a move without one of his brilliant plans.
Trowa has been alone his whole life, this has no effect on him. In situations where a normal human would go insane from the lack of company he is perfectly at home, and his mind rivals no other's. There's not a lot of information I can get from him, he's so quiet and still. But sometimes I think that he would be better at being the infiltration artist than me. He and Quatre deserve one another.
So now to my problem. I now realize that I know nothing about our teammate, Wufei. Chang Wufei, a clan name, Chinese I think. I've searched data bases, there is no information. I've gone through his things, stark as a hotel room. He volunteers no information about himself, he helps when necessary with missions and pesters at us other than that. But beyond that, he's so quiet he fades away, more so than myself or Trowa.
Until several nights ago I barely even remembered he was there, so unobtrusive was he at meetings. Then one night I was sent to fetch him for a meeting (that's me, little gopher) and he was meditating, a sudden peak into his life. And even more than that! His room was decorated like a dojo! More information.
Since then I've been keeping tabs on him, trying to be his friend, get him to say something, anything, but nothing. Heero's starting to get jealous, which, yes, is dangerous, but I can't help this obsession, I really need to know. What is Wufei's role on our team? What happened in his past to make him a hero?
******
Wufei peeked into Duo's room. "Duo?" The baka was gone again. He seemed to disappear exactly whenever they had an important meeting to hold. Ah well, he'd show up just in the nick of time, he usually does.
Wufei was about to leave when his sharp eyes caught his name on the computer screen. He turned, intrigued, and scrolled up to see what the document was about. A little surprised to find a journal entry, he guiltily read on.
He paused for a moment, "I shouldn't do this, this is a diary, a journal, it is not honorable," he paused again, "but Duo did leave it open like this, I can't help but read it."
That issue settle happily, he read on in wonder, as he discovered a deeper side to the gundam pilot he really didn't know that well. Duo was hardly a baka, and he had never realized any of these things about the people he worked with either. How unobservant he was!
He shut the laptop screen and carried the computer with him as he quickly left Duo's room. He needed to find Duo and speak with him about this. He would after the meeting, if that failed, after the mission. He would tell Duo his reason for being a hero, as shameful as it was.
*to be continued*