Chapter 9
Chloe sat in deep meditation in one of the temple's most secluded rooms, hidden away from most of the Jedi and containing only one meditation chair and no windows, allowing the dark silence envelop her. Here she had sat for the past two hours, still in her nightgown, trying to contemplate the occurrences of the morning. Her fight with Brady still weighed heavily on her mind. Had she truly meant what she had said? Would she give up all she had ever known because of this stubborn man's absurd reasoning? To stop her friendships with both Anakin and Obi-Wan or give up her life as a Jedi. The only thing she had ever truly known or wanted her entire life. But if she gave that up, she could maybe live a somewhat normal existence on her home planet of Naboo. Start a family even. But she wouldn't see Obi-Wan or Anakin everyday, so it actually would be as though she had given up those relationships anyway. How did her sister do it? Padme was married to Anakin, so in love that they were willing to give up everything, but they couldn't truly be together, all the time, as husband and wife. Could she really give up Anakin and Obi-Wan and being a Jedi? It didn't even seem like an option. And why did Brady have to even suggest it? What was his problem with her? Did he hate her so that he wanted to destroy her entire existence? Or was it Anakin and Obi-Wan he had something against. Ben. If this altercation with Brady was weighing heavily on her mind, the look on Obi-Wan's face was in the forefront. She knew that he understood what had taken place, but it still hurt. Both for he and she. She didn't know if her heart broke more when Brady decreed she couldn't see them anymore or the look on Ben's face as he turned away. She was sixteen going on seventeen and already her life had more turmoil than Master Yoda's. She had lost her beloved Master, been denied the chance to become everything she had wanted; a Jedi, had been given the most abominable Master anyone could ever have who is forcing her to choose between her life and her friends. Her friends were her life, didn't he understand that? They are what made her who she is, and giving that up. Giving them up. It was the furthest thing from an option she would ever consider. But that was the problem, Jedi Master Black was making her consider it. But perhaps she could change his mind. Maybe what his problem truly is is that he never had anyone like Ani or Ben in his life. He worked alone, secluded, never having anyone to cling to under any circumstance. Perhaps Chloe could change that, be the one there for him, his friend, and then he might let Chloe continue to see Ani and Ben. To become a Jedi Knight. If she could touch his life the way that they had touched hers, maybe he would understand. Granted he was the single most stubborn person in the galaxy, and almost as hot headed as she, and maybe even Ani. But once an Amidala made up her mind, there was no stopping her. She would get what she wanted, what she needed. She would become a Jedi Knight with her closest friends standing by her side, and perhaps even make Jedi Master Brady Black's life worth something. Because a life without friends, companionship, even love was terrible. So to keep that herself, to keep Ben and Ani, she would be willing to do the same for a man she abhorred more than any other. With new found resolve Chloe opened her eyes slowly, allowing her eyes to adjust to the dim light of the room. She uncrossed her legs and placed her bare feet on the cold floor, preparing to push herself up, but was interrupted as she heard the hydraulics on the door start as someone stepped through the doorway.
"I was wondering what took you so long to find me." Chloe said as she repositioned herself back on the pad as she felt the person's presence directly behind her.
"Well, let's just say, I got distracted." The dark cloaked Jedi Master said as he sat down next to Chloe, his thigh barely touching hers as she smoothed her nightgown over her folded legs.
"Distracted." She said slowly. "In other words…"
"I had to keep Anakin from attacking our dear Brady Black. Without you there he lost all of his resolve and attempted to retaliate by lunging at him. Let's just say it was not a pretty sight. You know how Anakin can be."
"Boy do I. So, he didn't run out looking for me after I left?" Chloe asked curiously as she turned to face Obi-Wan, letting her eyes settle over his features in the dim light. While she could not see his eyes fully, she knew that the hurt was still there, masked behind the smile on his face.
"Well after you left, he sank down defeated. Which any normal creature would do after losing to you in a fight." He said chuckling. "Then as I attempted to hold Anakin back, he finally came to his senses, well what senses Brady Black has, and left the room in a full sprint. Although I am not certain if it was to look for you, to think of some plan to begin to rectify the situation, or that he was completely afraid of the wrath that is Anakin Skywalker."
"Anakin is rather hotheaded. But I am glad to see that you could control him, and did not get hurt yourself." She said as she saw his smile fade. "But you did get hurt. I hurt you." She said reaching out to take his hand in hers. "I am very sorry. I truly am. But I would never do anything with Ani. Besides he is a spoiled brat." She said trying to lighten the mood as she saw Obi-Wan's face smile slightly. "I do not love him. He is my best friend and I love him as such, but never anything past that. Mine and Ani's is a rather unique relationship, but only as cohorts, or sparing partners, or just someone to share your deep dark secrets with. You understand that. You've seen our friendship from the beginning." She said pausing as her mind took her back to a time not so long ago. "I remember the first time I saw Ani. I was six and he was ten. He had just entered the academy and was of course put in classes with the younger students, despite the fact that even some of us excelled more than he did. But he was a fast learner and soon sailed past us. Well most of us." She said laughing. "But it was a day unlike any other. I was having lunch in the courtyard, one of the only parks, you know the one." She said as Obi- Wan nodded. "I would always go there because it reminded me of home. So, I would sit under a tree, eat my lunch and read. As I always did and still do. But that day ended up being probably one of the most important in my life. I was sitting there, minding my own business when I saw this sandy headed Padawan sitting underneath one of the other trees, his head in his hands and what sounded to be crying. Although he will never admit to it. I should have continued to mind my own business, but we all know how I am, so I got up and walked over, and seated myself directly across from him, my presence alone causing him to raise his head, his face streaked with tears, but his mouth in the well known Anakin scowl. So, I asked him what was the matter, and before he could give me his hotheaded and no doubt rude answer, I took his hand in my own, surprising us both. And it forced him to stop himself and look into my eyes. And he did, and I could feel that anger leave him. And then he answered truthfully. He said that he missed his mother and that was why he was crying. He knew Jedi did not cry, but most were not like him. They barely knew their mothers, but he was raised by his and loved her very much and missed her with all his soul would allow. I never felt more sorry for someone in my life. So, I got up on my knees and leaned forward, his body much larger than mine, and I wrapped my arms around him and hugged him. And I told him that if he ever needed a mother, that I would be his. And he laughed, but not a mean laugh, and said thank you, but that he didn't need another mother, and that I was too young to be his mother anyway, but that he would look to me for comfort and friendship anytime. And I believed him, for it was true. Because in that moment it was the start of our friendship. And in that moment, it was when I met you." She said smiling. "He took my hand within his and we walked, he wanted you to meet me, so we searched for you until we found you eating your own lunch. And with his brave Anakin façade, he held my hand and walked right up to you and said. 'Master Kenobi, this is my new best friend. She would like to be my mother, but I had to explain to her that she could not be. You know younger kids. But in the future, if I cannot marry my own space angel, I will marry her. I just thought that you would like to know.'"
"And then you pushed him." Obi-Wan said smiling as he remembered. "You pushed him down hard on the ground and complained that that was not part of the deal, that you would never marry him. And then you turned to me and looked at me with those huge blue eyes."
"And that was the first time I looked at you." She continued. "And in that moment I was the most jealous person in the galaxy. I had never seen you, but we had all heard of you, you had just killed a Sith. I looked at you with your messy hair that you were attempting to grow out and your awkwardness of being a Master and I was taken. I thought you were the most brave and heroic and handsome man I had ever seen and I wanted to have you as a Master, even then. So, I introduced myself to you, and then told you that your Padawan was out of his mind to think that I would ever marry him. And you chuckled as you stood up, towering over me, to help Anakin off the floor. He was embarrassed, but not mad at me. And you told him that you two would have to have a talk about love. And he said that he didn't love me, he just wanted me for always. And you smiled. And I will never forget your smile that day, as you excused yourself and Ani, walking away leaving me there, my life forever changed."
"I can't believe you remember all of that, in great detail too." He said
"It was the day my life changed." She said smiling as she took her hand and raised it to his cheek, his face leaning against her palm. "And for the better too.
"And mine as well. I watched you grow from that moment, into the beautiful woman you are today." He said smiling at her as she blushed. "And I couldn't imagine my life without you."
"And neither could I. Anakin is my best friend, and you. You mean the world to me Ben. And that is why I am sorry for what you saw. I would never want to hurt you, ever. I am truly sorry Ben." She said sadly as she ran her hand over his bearded face, feeling as he too lifted his palm to her face, starring deeply within her eyes.
"And I am sorry too." He said stroking her cheek.
"For what? You did nothing wrong?" She said with a small smile as his cool fingertips traced her face.
"No, not yet." He said slyly. And just as Chloe was about to ask once more what he meant, she felt his lips firmly against her own, kissing her with a passion she had never known. As she got over the shock, she smiled against his kiss, his beard tickling her face, as she gave back what Obi-Wan was giving to her. Leaning into the kiss she parted her mouth slowly, allowing Obi-Wan to enter her mouth as they both moaned at first contact, their feelings stirred beyond anything they had ever felt. She moved her hand to the back of his neck to play with the hair that lay there, as she felt his own hand dive deeply into her curls, using them to pull her closer until there bodies lay flush against one another, until the only thing that separated them was the Force that guided us all.
Chloe sat in deep meditation in one of the temple's most secluded rooms, hidden away from most of the Jedi and containing only one meditation chair and no windows, allowing the dark silence envelop her. Here she had sat for the past two hours, still in her nightgown, trying to contemplate the occurrences of the morning. Her fight with Brady still weighed heavily on her mind. Had she truly meant what she had said? Would she give up all she had ever known because of this stubborn man's absurd reasoning? To stop her friendships with both Anakin and Obi-Wan or give up her life as a Jedi. The only thing she had ever truly known or wanted her entire life. But if she gave that up, she could maybe live a somewhat normal existence on her home planet of Naboo. Start a family even. But she wouldn't see Obi-Wan or Anakin everyday, so it actually would be as though she had given up those relationships anyway. How did her sister do it? Padme was married to Anakin, so in love that they were willing to give up everything, but they couldn't truly be together, all the time, as husband and wife. Could she really give up Anakin and Obi-Wan and being a Jedi? It didn't even seem like an option. And why did Brady have to even suggest it? What was his problem with her? Did he hate her so that he wanted to destroy her entire existence? Or was it Anakin and Obi-Wan he had something against. Ben. If this altercation with Brady was weighing heavily on her mind, the look on Obi-Wan's face was in the forefront. She knew that he understood what had taken place, but it still hurt. Both for he and she. She didn't know if her heart broke more when Brady decreed she couldn't see them anymore or the look on Ben's face as he turned away. She was sixteen going on seventeen and already her life had more turmoil than Master Yoda's. She had lost her beloved Master, been denied the chance to become everything she had wanted; a Jedi, had been given the most abominable Master anyone could ever have who is forcing her to choose between her life and her friends. Her friends were her life, didn't he understand that? They are what made her who she is, and giving that up. Giving them up. It was the furthest thing from an option she would ever consider. But that was the problem, Jedi Master Black was making her consider it. But perhaps she could change his mind. Maybe what his problem truly is is that he never had anyone like Ani or Ben in his life. He worked alone, secluded, never having anyone to cling to under any circumstance. Perhaps Chloe could change that, be the one there for him, his friend, and then he might let Chloe continue to see Ani and Ben. To become a Jedi Knight. If she could touch his life the way that they had touched hers, maybe he would understand. Granted he was the single most stubborn person in the galaxy, and almost as hot headed as she, and maybe even Ani. But once an Amidala made up her mind, there was no stopping her. She would get what she wanted, what she needed. She would become a Jedi Knight with her closest friends standing by her side, and perhaps even make Jedi Master Brady Black's life worth something. Because a life without friends, companionship, even love was terrible. So to keep that herself, to keep Ben and Ani, she would be willing to do the same for a man she abhorred more than any other. With new found resolve Chloe opened her eyes slowly, allowing her eyes to adjust to the dim light of the room. She uncrossed her legs and placed her bare feet on the cold floor, preparing to push herself up, but was interrupted as she heard the hydraulics on the door start as someone stepped through the doorway.
"I was wondering what took you so long to find me." Chloe said as she repositioned herself back on the pad as she felt the person's presence directly behind her.
"Well, let's just say, I got distracted." The dark cloaked Jedi Master said as he sat down next to Chloe, his thigh barely touching hers as she smoothed her nightgown over her folded legs.
"Distracted." She said slowly. "In other words…"
"I had to keep Anakin from attacking our dear Brady Black. Without you there he lost all of his resolve and attempted to retaliate by lunging at him. Let's just say it was not a pretty sight. You know how Anakin can be."
"Boy do I. So, he didn't run out looking for me after I left?" Chloe asked curiously as she turned to face Obi-Wan, letting her eyes settle over his features in the dim light. While she could not see his eyes fully, she knew that the hurt was still there, masked behind the smile on his face.
"Well after you left, he sank down defeated. Which any normal creature would do after losing to you in a fight." He said chuckling. "Then as I attempted to hold Anakin back, he finally came to his senses, well what senses Brady Black has, and left the room in a full sprint. Although I am not certain if it was to look for you, to think of some plan to begin to rectify the situation, or that he was completely afraid of the wrath that is Anakin Skywalker."
"Anakin is rather hotheaded. But I am glad to see that you could control him, and did not get hurt yourself." She said as she saw his smile fade. "But you did get hurt. I hurt you." She said reaching out to take his hand in hers. "I am very sorry. I truly am. But I would never do anything with Ani. Besides he is a spoiled brat." She said trying to lighten the mood as she saw Obi-Wan's face smile slightly. "I do not love him. He is my best friend and I love him as such, but never anything past that. Mine and Ani's is a rather unique relationship, but only as cohorts, or sparing partners, or just someone to share your deep dark secrets with. You understand that. You've seen our friendship from the beginning." She said pausing as her mind took her back to a time not so long ago. "I remember the first time I saw Ani. I was six and he was ten. He had just entered the academy and was of course put in classes with the younger students, despite the fact that even some of us excelled more than he did. But he was a fast learner and soon sailed past us. Well most of us." She said laughing. "But it was a day unlike any other. I was having lunch in the courtyard, one of the only parks, you know the one." She said as Obi- Wan nodded. "I would always go there because it reminded me of home. So, I would sit under a tree, eat my lunch and read. As I always did and still do. But that day ended up being probably one of the most important in my life. I was sitting there, minding my own business when I saw this sandy headed Padawan sitting underneath one of the other trees, his head in his hands and what sounded to be crying. Although he will never admit to it. I should have continued to mind my own business, but we all know how I am, so I got up and walked over, and seated myself directly across from him, my presence alone causing him to raise his head, his face streaked with tears, but his mouth in the well known Anakin scowl. So, I asked him what was the matter, and before he could give me his hotheaded and no doubt rude answer, I took his hand in my own, surprising us both. And it forced him to stop himself and look into my eyes. And he did, and I could feel that anger leave him. And then he answered truthfully. He said that he missed his mother and that was why he was crying. He knew Jedi did not cry, but most were not like him. They barely knew their mothers, but he was raised by his and loved her very much and missed her with all his soul would allow. I never felt more sorry for someone in my life. So, I got up on my knees and leaned forward, his body much larger than mine, and I wrapped my arms around him and hugged him. And I told him that if he ever needed a mother, that I would be his. And he laughed, but not a mean laugh, and said thank you, but that he didn't need another mother, and that I was too young to be his mother anyway, but that he would look to me for comfort and friendship anytime. And I believed him, for it was true. Because in that moment it was the start of our friendship. And in that moment, it was when I met you." She said smiling. "He took my hand within his and we walked, he wanted you to meet me, so we searched for you until we found you eating your own lunch. And with his brave Anakin façade, he held my hand and walked right up to you and said. 'Master Kenobi, this is my new best friend. She would like to be my mother, but I had to explain to her that she could not be. You know younger kids. But in the future, if I cannot marry my own space angel, I will marry her. I just thought that you would like to know.'"
"And then you pushed him." Obi-Wan said smiling as he remembered. "You pushed him down hard on the ground and complained that that was not part of the deal, that you would never marry him. And then you turned to me and looked at me with those huge blue eyes."
"And that was the first time I looked at you." She continued. "And in that moment I was the most jealous person in the galaxy. I had never seen you, but we had all heard of you, you had just killed a Sith. I looked at you with your messy hair that you were attempting to grow out and your awkwardness of being a Master and I was taken. I thought you were the most brave and heroic and handsome man I had ever seen and I wanted to have you as a Master, even then. So, I introduced myself to you, and then told you that your Padawan was out of his mind to think that I would ever marry him. And you chuckled as you stood up, towering over me, to help Anakin off the floor. He was embarrassed, but not mad at me. And you told him that you two would have to have a talk about love. And he said that he didn't love me, he just wanted me for always. And you smiled. And I will never forget your smile that day, as you excused yourself and Ani, walking away leaving me there, my life forever changed."
"I can't believe you remember all of that, in great detail too." He said
"It was the day my life changed." She said smiling as she took her hand and raised it to his cheek, his face leaning against her palm. "And for the better too.
"And mine as well. I watched you grow from that moment, into the beautiful woman you are today." He said smiling at her as she blushed. "And I couldn't imagine my life without you."
"And neither could I. Anakin is my best friend, and you. You mean the world to me Ben. And that is why I am sorry for what you saw. I would never want to hurt you, ever. I am truly sorry Ben." She said sadly as she ran her hand over his bearded face, feeling as he too lifted his palm to her face, starring deeply within her eyes.
"And I am sorry too." He said stroking her cheek.
"For what? You did nothing wrong?" She said with a small smile as his cool fingertips traced her face.
"No, not yet." He said slyly. And just as Chloe was about to ask once more what he meant, she felt his lips firmly against her own, kissing her with a passion she had never known. As she got over the shock, she smiled against his kiss, his beard tickling her face, as she gave back what Obi-Wan was giving to her. Leaning into the kiss she parted her mouth slowly, allowing Obi-Wan to enter her mouth as they both moaned at first contact, their feelings stirred beyond anything they had ever felt. She moved her hand to the back of his neck to play with the hair that lay there, as she felt his own hand dive deeply into her curls, using them to pull her closer until there bodies lay flush against one another, until the only thing that separated them was the Force that guided us all.