A/N: Thanks to everyone for the support and the lovely comments! Sorry this took so long to get
out to you, but I think (and hope) that it will be worth the wait. IMO, this is definitely one
of the better things I've written. Hope you think so too. ;+)
Also, I have included some cultural notes at the beginning, as some of you will probably not be familiar with Japanese New Year's traditions.
Cultural Notes: toshikosisoba: buckwheat noodles (lit. "year-crossing noodles")
joya no kane: the tradition of striking the joya no kane (lit. "end-of-the-year bell") from nearby Buddhist temples. The tolls represent the leaving behind of 108 bonno, or worldly concerns of the old year, which, according to Buddhist belief, torment mankind. During this ceremony, each toll is struck after the reverberations from the preceding toll have dissipated. The last peal of the bell is struck at midnight, coinciding with the first few seconds of the New Year; thus a new beginning dawns, enabling the start of a prosperous and joyous year.
Shinto shrines: a typical shinto shrine has a Torii (gate) at the entrance to the shrine precinct and a main building where gods are enshrined, and Kannushi (priests) and visitors worship the gods. Major shrines usually have their Toriis and pillars of the main buildings colored in cinnabar red. A typical Shinto shrine is usually situated near water at the foot of a mountain.
People visit shrines in order to pray for good fortune and to turn away evil spirits. The way to pray at a shrine is as follows (there are variations): First of all you should purify yourself by cleaning your hands and your mouth with clean water at a little pavilion outside the main building. Then you throw your small offering, usually a coin, into the box in front of the sanctuary, bow twice deeply, clap your hands twice, bow deeply once more and pray for a few seconds. You are not supposed to visit a shrine if you are sick, have an open wound or are mourning because those things are considered impure.
At most shrines one can get amulets, charms and post cards against a small offering (i.e. buy it for money). You can also buy pieces of paper which tell you your fortune. By tying the piece of paper around the branch of a tree afterwards, good fortune will come true or predicted bad fortune can be avoided. Wishes can also be written on small wooden plates which are left at the shrine.
New Year's:
Youji clattered down the stairs, shrugging into his jacket. He glanced at Aya sitting on the couch. "Ken and Omi and I are going to visit the shrine," he said. "Do you want me to bring you back a fortune?"
Aya set his book down and gazed into the fire for a minute. "I'll come," he said quietly.
"Are you sure?" Youji asked in amazement, stopping mid-stride.
"Yes." Aya stood up and walked over to Youji. Their eyes met for only a second, but an eternity of knowledge passed between them. "I am not mourning anymore," Aya said, touching Youji's cheek.
"That's good," Youji said huskily, leaning in to kiss his lover.
Ken burst in a moment later. "C'mon Youji, let's go! Oh, umm . . . " he trailed off.
Youji broke away from the kiss, still holding onto Aya. "We're all going this year," he said.
"Oh!" Ken grinned and whirled around, walking briskly toward the front door. "Let's go then! Want to get there before the crowds!"
"Crowds? What crowds?" Youji asked, throwing Aya his sweater. "We're in the middle of nowhere! How could there possibly be any crowds?"
Pulling on his sweater and wrapping a scarf around his neck, Aya followed Ken. "It's New Years Eve," he said.
In the car they were mostly silent, Ken and Omi staring out the windows in the back, Youji concentrating on the road, and Aya sitting unmoving with his eyes closed, alone in his thoughts. From the sparse information Youji had gleaned about Aya's previous life, he knew this could potentially be very difficult for his lover. He still cared for his sister deeply, and, Youji knew, he had mourned deeply for the life he had lost. But, and at this thought, a tiny, secret smile spread over his face, Aya had said he wasn't mourning anymore.
With these happy thoughts, the trip to the ancient Shinto shrine nestled at the foot of the mountain had never seemed so short. It had grown dark a few hours earlier, and the headlights illuminated the cars packed into the small parking lot in front of the shrine. Slamming the door behind him, Youji could hear very faintly, in the village below the shrine, the Buddhist temple begin striking the joya no kane. As each reverberation died away he could feel the circumstances of his life drop away, until he was just any other man, coming to pray at the shrine for luck and prosperity, and draw his New Year's fortune. With a glance at Ken and Omi, he could tell they felt the same. They scampered ahead, queuing up to purify themselves before entering.
Aya, on the other hand, was standing with his fists clenched, mouth in a tight, grim line as he stared at the red and black torii at the entrance to the shrine grounds. He gave an aborted turn toward the car door and caught Youji's eyes. "I can't do this," he said flatly.
In a few short strides, Youji was around the car and facing his lover resolutely. "Yes you can," he insisted. "I know you don't usually go in for all the religious stuff," he continued seriously, "but listen to the bells. Let them take your concerns and your fears and carry them away in the echoes of their sounds. Let them cleanse you and bring you peace for the new year. Just believe for one day that there is more to life than what we have, and that we can reach it." He stepped forward, engulfing Aya in his arms and burying his face in his silky hair. In the darkness of the parking lot, it was unlikely anyone would see them. "Believe for me," he whispered, "because without you I can't believe in anything." Gently stroking Youji's back, Aya pressed his lips to the pulse beating in the taller man's neck. "All right," he said.
They joined the rest of their team at the end of the line, silently washing their hands and rinsing out their mouths at the small pavilion outside the main building. Youji dug two coins out of his pocket, handing one to Aya, and they tossed them with a small clink into the offering box. He bowed and clapped, closing his eyes and sending up a brief, heartfelt prayer. Moving to the side to make room for more petitioners, he watched Aya, head bowed, lips moving silently. Ken and Omi were buying fortunes from the old Kannushi (priest) who was custodian of the shrine.
Aya turned, stepping neatly out of the way of an elderly couple heading toward the priest, small wooden plaques with wishes written neatly on them clenched tightly in their hands. Youji raised his eyebrow. "Do you want a fortune?" he asked.
Shaking his head, Aya stood quietly beside him, waiting for their two younger friends to finish.
"All done?" Youji inquired, as Omi bounced up, eyes shining, Ken not too far behind.
"Yup!" Omi brandished his fortune. "It's a good one this year!" he exclaimed. "Just give me a minute to tie it to the tree and then we can go!" He ran off, beaming.
They walked slowly to the car, each contemplating the year ahead. The bells still resonated through the still mountain air, sweetly chiming over the murmur of the brook, and the noises of people clapping to gain the attention of the gods.
The car ride back to Villa Weiss, unlike the journey down, was more cheerful. Ken and Omi talked of inconsequential things in the backseat, and Aya gazed out the window, now and then stroking Youji's hand resting comfortably on his thigh. Youji drove carefully with one hand, eyes on the road, but every once in a while, straying to his lover's elegant profile.
At long last, they reached the Villa. Omi ran to the front door and fumbled with his keys. "Come on, Aya," he called, opening the door. "Help me cook the soba!"
With a wry glance at Youji, Aya strode off to the kitchen, leaving the other two to nurse the fire back to life in the living room. This involved Ken crouching in front of the fire feeding it things, and Youji instructing him from the relative safety and comfort of the couch. When the fire was sufficiently burning, Ken lay back with a contented sigh, pillowing his head on his arms.
Youji stood and stretched, grabbing his jacket off the back of the couch and heading upstairs. When he came down, hiding something behind his back, Aya and Omi were just carefully carrying out the toshikoshisoba. Ken followed behind, bearing a tray holding two jars of steaming sake and four shallow cups. Since his three teammates seemed to have their arms full, Youji shoved the coffee table in front of the fire and set down his New Year's offering with a clunk.
"What's that?" asked Ken suspiciously, carefully placing his tray in the middle of the low table.
"Peppermint schnapps!" Youji announced cheerfully. "We need something cheerful and holiday-ish to celebrate with."
Aya, face impassive, knelt down and started handing out bowls of noodles.
Omi had plopped himself down opposite Aya and was busy slurping broth out of his bowl. "We already have sake," he pointed out, gesturing with his dripping chopsticks.
"Oh, c'mon guys," Youji wheedled, warming his hands around his bowl. "You gotta at least try it!"
Quietly, Aya poured them each a cup of sake. He raised his own to his lips and drained it all in one swallow, shuddering slightly as the warmed alcohol trailed a path down to his stomach. "Let's drink this first," he said, refilling his cup.
Ken shook his head. "Not too much for me," he said. He sipped slowly. "Alcohol has lots of empty calories."
Youji looked at him incredulously. "Kenken," he said, "when are you ever going to have to worry about burning those calories off? You can't sit still for more than two seconds." Ken was notoriously careful about what he put in his body, and Youji could never resist teasing him about it. For that matter, he mused, Ken was probably pretty careful about what he put his body into as well. At that thought, he struggled not to burst out laughing.
"Shut up Youji! I need to keep in shape!" His actions belying his words, Ken defiantly drained his cup and poured himself another.
Youji gave up his inner struggle and grinned. "That's better."
After they had finished their traditional meal, they sat, drinking companionably, and talking about nothing in general. Youji kept discreetly refilling cups until the last of the sake was gone, and they were all more than a little tipsy.
Omi, still giggling at something Youji had said (but couldn't quite remember) listed slightly and slumped against Ken, leaning on the couch. Ken, nonplussed, patted the top of Omi's head. In response, Omi snuggled against him, murmuring, "You're warm."
Ken turned beet red and gave Youji a pleading 'help me!' look. Receiving no help from that quarter, he awkwardly put an arm around his younger teammate and sighed. "Might as well go all out," he said. "Let's try that stuff you brought, Yo-tan."
Sometime during their drinking, the table had been pushed to the side again, to allow them to stretch out more comfortably on the floor. Aya was sprawled where the table had been sitting, a dreamy expression on his face. This was as close to outwardly happy as Aya had ever looked, Youji realized, swaying on his feet a little as he grabbed the bottle of peppermint schnapps. He mentally snorted. Figures that he would have to be drunk to look happy, he thought to himself, sitting back down on the floor and stretching his long legs out in front of him.
He took a swig from the bottle and smacked his lips appreciatively at the smooth peppermint taste. Aya sat up long enough to grab the bottle and drink before passing it to Ken. He lay back down, but this time he laid his head on Youji's thigh, rubbing his cheek surreptitiously on the rough fabric of the older man's jeans. Youji stroked Aya's silky hair appreciatively, chuckling as Ken coughed a little at the taste, then nudged Omi to try it.
Omi squinted his eyes shut as he swished the liquor around in his mouth. "Tastes like toothpaste," he announced, and then slumped back against Ken.
Ken's cheeks turned a little pink at this, but he looked fondly at the top of Omi's head. He took a longer drink from the bottle and, setting it on the floor, rested his head on the couch cushions. "Tastes like candy canes," he said dreamily.
Making a grab for the bottle, Youji replied, "Tastes like peppermint schnapps."
For some reason, Aya thought this was hilarious, and Youji could feel his whole body shaking as he tried to muffle his laughter. Taking one final swallow, he replaced the cap and set the bottle off to the side. Grabbing a pillow from the couch, he pulled and tugged at Aya until his lover was laying half on top of him, his head resting on Youji's chest.
Sleepily kissing the top of Aya's head, Youji closed his eyes. "Happy New Year," he whispered.
The only response was Ken's gentle snores and a murmur from Aya as he pushed his face deeper into the fabric of Youji's shirt. Smiling, Youji held his lover tight and dropped off to sleep.
Also, I have included some cultural notes at the beginning, as some of you will probably not be familiar with Japanese New Year's traditions.
Cultural Notes: toshikosisoba: buckwheat noodles (lit. "year-crossing noodles")
joya no kane: the tradition of striking the joya no kane (lit. "end-of-the-year bell") from nearby Buddhist temples. The tolls represent the leaving behind of 108 bonno, or worldly concerns of the old year, which, according to Buddhist belief, torment mankind. During this ceremony, each toll is struck after the reverberations from the preceding toll have dissipated. The last peal of the bell is struck at midnight, coinciding with the first few seconds of the New Year; thus a new beginning dawns, enabling the start of a prosperous and joyous year.
Shinto shrines: a typical shinto shrine has a Torii (gate) at the entrance to the shrine precinct and a main building where gods are enshrined, and Kannushi (priests) and visitors worship the gods. Major shrines usually have their Toriis and pillars of the main buildings colored in cinnabar red. A typical Shinto shrine is usually situated near water at the foot of a mountain.
People visit shrines in order to pray for good fortune and to turn away evil spirits. The way to pray at a shrine is as follows (there are variations): First of all you should purify yourself by cleaning your hands and your mouth with clean water at a little pavilion outside the main building. Then you throw your small offering, usually a coin, into the box in front of the sanctuary, bow twice deeply, clap your hands twice, bow deeply once more and pray for a few seconds. You are not supposed to visit a shrine if you are sick, have an open wound or are mourning because those things are considered impure.
At most shrines one can get amulets, charms and post cards against a small offering (i.e. buy it for money). You can also buy pieces of paper which tell you your fortune. By tying the piece of paper around the branch of a tree afterwards, good fortune will come true or predicted bad fortune can be avoided. Wishes can also be written on small wooden plates which are left at the shrine.
New Year's:
Youji clattered down the stairs, shrugging into his jacket. He glanced at Aya sitting on the couch. "Ken and Omi and I are going to visit the shrine," he said. "Do you want me to bring you back a fortune?"
Aya set his book down and gazed into the fire for a minute. "I'll come," he said quietly.
"Are you sure?" Youji asked in amazement, stopping mid-stride.
"Yes." Aya stood up and walked over to Youji. Their eyes met for only a second, but an eternity of knowledge passed between them. "I am not mourning anymore," Aya said, touching Youji's cheek.
"That's good," Youji said huskily, leaning in to kiss his lover.
Ken burst in a moment later. "C'mon Youji, let's go! Oh, umm . . . " he trailed off.
Youji broke away from the kiss, still holding onto Aya. "We're all going this year," he said.
"Oh!" Ken grinned and whirled around, walking briskly toward the front door. "Let's go then! Want to get there before the crowds!"
"Crowds? What crowds?" Youji asked, throwing Aya his sweater. "We're in the middle of nowhere! How could there possibly be any crowds?"
Pulling on his sweater and wrapping a scarf around his neck, Aya followed Ken. "It's New Years Eve," he said.
In the car they were mostly silent, Ken and Omi staring out the windows in the back, Youji concentrating on the road, and Aya sitting unmoving with his eyes closed, alone in his thoughts. From the sparse information Youji had gleaned about Aya's previous life, he knew this could potentially be very difficult for his lover. He still cared for his sister deeply, and, Youji knew, he had mourned deeply for the life he had lost. But, and at this thought, a tiny, secret smile spread over his face, Aya had said he wasn't mourning anymore.
With these happy thoughts, the trip to the ancient Shinto shrine nestled at the foot of the mountain had never seemed so short. It had grown dark a few hours earlier, and the headlights illuminated the cars packed into the small parking lot in front of the shrine. Slamming the door behind him, Youji could hear very faintly, in the village below the shrine, the Buddhist temple begin striking the joya no kane. As each reverberation died away he could feel the circumstances of his life drop away, until he was just any other man, coming to pray at the shrine for luck and prosperity, and draw his New Year's fortune. With a glance at Ken and Omi, he could tell they felt the same. They scampered ahead, queuing up to purify themselves before entering.
Aya, on the other hand, was standing with his fists clenched, mouth in a tight, grim line as he stared at the red and black torii at the entrance to the shrine grounds. He gave an aborted turn toward the car door and caught Youji's eyes. "I can't do this," he said flatly.
In a few short strides, Youji was around the car and facing his lover resolutely. "Yes you can," he insisted. "I know you don't usually go in for all the religious stuff," he continued seriously, "but listen to the bells. Let them take your concerns and your fears and carry them away in the echoes of their sounds. Let them cleanse you and bring you peace for the new year. Just believe for one day that there is more to life than what we have, and that we can reach it." He stepped forward, engulfing Aya in his arms and burying his face in his silky hair. In the darkness of the parking lot, it was unlikely anyone would see them. "Believe for me," he whispered, "because without you I can't believe in anything." Gently stroking Youji's back, Aya pressed his lips to the pulse beating in the taller man's neck. "All right," he said.
They joined the rest of their team at the end of the line, silently washing their hands and rinsing out their mouths at the small pavilion outside the main building. Youji dug two coins out of his pocket, handing one to Aya, and they tossed them with a small clink into the offering box. He bowed and clapped, closing his eyes and sending up a brief, heartfelt prayer. Moving to the side to make room for more petitioners, he watched Aya, head bowed, lips moving silently. Ken and Omi were buying fortunes from the old Kannushi (priest) who was custodian of the shrine.
Aya turned, stepping neatly out of the way of an elderly couple heading toward the priest, small wooden plaques with wishes written neatly on them clenched tightly in their hands. Youji raised his eyebrow. "Do you want a fortune?" he asked.
Shaking his head, Aya stood quietly beside him, waiting for their two younger friends to finish.
"All done?" Youji inquired, as Omi bounced up, eyes shining, Ken not too far behind.
"Yup!" Omi brandished his fortune. "It's a good one this year!" he exclaimed. "Just give me a minute to tie it to the tree and then we can go!" He ran off, beaming.
They walked slowly to the car, each contemplating the year ahead. The bells still resonated through the still mountain air, sweetly chiming over the murmur of the brook, and the noises of people clapping to gain the attention of the gods.
The car ride back to Villa Weiss, unlike the journey down, was more cheerful. Ken and Omi talked of inconsequential things in the backseat, and Aya gazed out the window, now and then stroking Youji's hand resting comfortably on his thigh. Youji drove carefully with one hand, eyes on the road, but every once in a while, straying to his lover's elegant profile.
At long last, they reached the Villa. Omi ran to the front door and fumbled with his keys. "Come on, Aya," he called, opening the door. "Help me cook the soba!"
With a wry glance at Youji, Aya strode off to the kitchen, leaving the other two to nurse the fire back to life in the living room. This involved Ken crouching in front of the fire feeding it things, and Youji instructing him from the relative safety and comfort of the couch. When the fire was sufficiently burning, Ken lay back with a contented sigh, pillowing his head on his arms.
Youji stood and stretched, grabbing his jacket off the back of the couch and heading upstairs. When he came down, hiding something behind his back, Aya and Omi were just carefully carrying out the toshikoshisoba. Ken followed behind, bearing a tray holding two jars of steaming sake and four shallow cups. Since his three teammates seemed to have their arms full, Youji shoved the coffee table in front of the fire and set down his New Year's offering with a clunk.
"What's that?" asked Ken suspiciously, carefully placing his tray in the middle of the low table.
"Peppermint schnapps!" Youji announced cheerfully. "We need something cheerful and holiday-ish to celebrate with."
Aya, face impassive, knelt down and started handing out bowls of noodles.
Omi had plopped himself down opposite Aya and was busy slurping broth out of his bowl. "We already have sake," he pointed out, gesturing with his dripping chopsticks.
"Oh, c'mon guys," Youji wheedled, warming his hands around his bowl. "You gotta at least try it!"
Quietly, Aya poured them each a cup of sake. He raised his own to his lips and drained it all in one swallow, shuddering slightly as the warmed alcohol trailed a path down to his stomach. "Let's drink this first," he said, refilling his cup.
Ken shook his head. "Not too much for me," he said. He sipped slowly. "Alcohol has lots of empty calories."
Youji looked at him incredulously. "Kenken," he said, "when are you ever going to have to worry about burning those calories off? You can't sit still for more than two seconds." Ken was notoriously careful about what he put in his body, and Youji could never resist teasing him about it. For that matter, he mused, Ken was probably pretty careful about what he put his body into as well. At that thought, he struggled not to burst out laughing.
"Shut up Youji! I need to keep in shape!" His actions belying his words, Ken defiantly drained his cup and poured himself another.
Youji gave up his inner struggle and grinned. "That's better."
After they had finished their traditional meal, they sat, drinking companionably, and talking about nothing in general. Youji kept discreetly refilling cups until the last of the sake was gone, and they were all more than a little tipsy.
Omi, still giggling at something Youji had said (but couldn't quite remember) listed slightly and slumped against Ken, leaning on the couch. Ken, nonplussed, patted the top of Omi's head. In response, Omi snuggled against him, murmuring, "You're warm."
Ken turned beet red and gave Youji a pleading 'help me!' look. Receiving no help from that quarter, he awkwardly put an arm around his younger teammate and sighed. "Might as well go all out," he said. "Let's try that stuff you brought, Yo-tan."
Sometime during their drinking, the table had been pushed to the side again, to allow them to stretch out more comfortably on the floor. Aya was sprawled where the table had been sitting, a dreamy expression on his face. This was as close to outwardly happy as Aya had ever looked, Youji realized, swaying on his feet a little as he grabbed the bottle of peppermint schnapps. He mentally snorted. Figures that he would have to be drunk to look happy, he thought to himself, sitting back down on the floor and stretching his long legs out in front of him.
He took a swig from the bottle and smacked his lips appreciatively at the smooth peppermint taste. Aya sat up long enough to grab the bottle and drink before passing it to Ken. He lay back down, but this time he laid his head on Youji's thigh, rubbing his cheek surreptitiously on the rough fabric of the older man's jeans. Youji stroked Aya's silky hair appreciatively, chuckling as Ken coughed a little at the taste, then nudged Omi to try it.
Omi squinted his eyes shut as he swished the liquor around in his mouth. "Tastes like toothpaste," he announced, and then slumped back against Ken.
Ken's cheeks turned a little pink at this, but he looked fondly at the top of Omi's head. He took a longer drink from the bottle and, setting it on the floor, rested his head on the couch cushions. "Tastes like candy canes," he said dreamily.
Making a grab for the bottle, Youji replied, "Tastes like peppermint schnapps."
For some reason, Aya thought this was hilarious, and Youji could feel his whole body shaking as he tried to muffle his laughter. Taking one final swallow, he replaced the cap and set the bottle off to the side. Grabbing a pillow from the couch, he pulled and tugged at Aya until his lover was laying half on top of him, his head resting on Youji's chest.
Sleepily kissing the top of Aya's head, Youji closed his eyes. "Happy New Year," he whispered.
The only response was Ken's gentle snores and a murmur from Aya as he pushed his face deeper into the fabric of Youji's shirt. Smiling, Youji held his lover tight and dropped off to sleep.