Disclaimer: None of them are owned by PartlyFoxyPartlyGrandma. Do you hear
me? None, I say!
Spoilers: Yes. For both the books AND the show.
Rating: Still PG-13.
A/N: The last time you tuned in, Draco had left after being called a fairy princess. Snape took his place but, unfortunately, turned our host into a spider and scared Ron shitless. Whoops! Did I say that? Yes. Yes I did. (The thought of Drew being a spider scares me shitless, too, because I happen to have arachnophobia. Nonetheless, I will work hard to make this chapter appealing, even if it does have a spider in it!)
Snape: Quit sniveling, Miss Granger!
Hermione: I wasn't sniveling!
Snape: SILENCE! (The audience the whole time had been looking back and forth between the two of them) Now we're going to play by my rules.
Harry: Why do I get a bad feeling about this?
Snape: Because you're going to be playing "Alphabet" again, that's why! (He laughs an evil laugh. People tend to do that when they're being evil!) The letter is R, and get cracking.
Hermione: But Professor, we need another player. It just wouldn't be right without Malfoy!
(Snape is sitting in Drew's seat and is petting Drew absentmindedly.)
Snape: Fine. I'll take his place. (He stands up and considers throwing Drew at Ron, but thinks better of it. But that would be his first and last good deed of the day.)
Harry: Who goes first?
Snape: Well, considering you're the "celebrity" here, why don't you, Mr. Potter?
Harry: But I went last time!
Snape: (Sighing) Fine. Miss Granger? Would you do us the honors?
Hermione: But of course.
Snape: Go. We have sixty seconds.
Ron: HOLD ON! What are we supposed to be acting out?
Snape: Pretend I'm about to kill you!
Ron: Oh, that shouldn't be too hard.
Hermione: May I start now?
(Snape slaps himself on the forehead.)
Snape: PLEASE!
Hermione: Ron! You shouldn't have added that last bit of Mandrake root.
Ron: Sorry, Hermione, but I thought you said you wanted an aphrodisiac!
Harry: Thanks for giving me bad images, Ron!
Snape: Until you three shut up, I am going to stand here menacingly.
Hermione: Voldemort's behind you, Professor.
(Snape actually turns around.)
Ron: Why did you have to say that name, Hermione?
Harry: Xavier says he liked his wild ride last night, Professor Snape!
(Snape is seething by now.)
Snape: You are expelled from Hogwarts, Mr. Potter.
(Harry gasps.)
Hermione: Zesty, aren't we, Professor?
(Ron gives her a weird look.)
Ron: Actually, he's pretty cruel and malicious if you ask me!
Harry: Buttering up to the teacher, are we, Ron?
Snape: Can't you be quiet for five seconds, Potter, and take a page out of Mr. Weasley's book?
(Ron sticks his tongue out at Harry.)
Hermione: Don't you think this is getting a bit weird?
Ron: Especially since we're being kind of nice to Snape?
Harry: Full of crap, you two are!
Snape: Give it up you three! You suck at this game!
Hermione: Ha! YOU suck!
Ron: I DON'T SUCK!
Harry: Just because you're a Weasley doesn't mean you're always the center of attention! Sheesh!
Snape: Kill! I'll kill you all!
Hermione: Leave me alone! I didn't do anything!
Ron: Man, oh man, is this getting good!
Harry: Nobody likes you, Snape! Get it through your greasy head!
(Snape glares at him.)
Snape: Oh, would you like me to break your wand in half as well as expel you?
(Harry's eyes widen.)
Hermione: Please, Professor! Have mercy on him!
Ron: Quit this game! It's getting too weird!
Snape: THANK MERLIN'S DEFORMED TOES THAT'S OVER!
A/N: Well, that was strange, but you can't blame me for that. Okay, so maybe you could, but it's (looks at clock) 3:56 AM, and I need some sleep. If you like, you could print my story out and use it for target practice. ANOTHER NOTE: I'm so happy I've gotten 15 reviews after two chapters only! That's a surprise for me! Please stay tuned for the next chapter! And don't forget to review and tell me what exactly you liked about this (or didn't like, it doesn't matter)!
Spoilers: Yes. For both the books AND the show.
Rating: Still PG-13.
A/N: The last time you tuned in, Draco had left after being called a fairy princess. Snape took his place but, unfortunately, turned our host into a spider and scared Ron shitless. Whoops! Did I say that? Yes. Yes I did. (The thought of Drew being a spider scares me shitless, too, because I happen to have arachnophobia. Nonetheless, I will work hard to make this chapter appealing, even if it does have a spider in it!)
Snape: Quit sniveling, Miss Granger!
Hermione: I wasn't sniveling!
Snape: SILENCE! (The audience the whole time had been looking back and forth between the two of them) Now we're going to play by my rules.
Harry: Why do I get a bad feeling about this?
Snape: Because you're going to be playing "Alphabet" again, that's why! (He laughs an evil laugh. People tend to do that when they're being evil!) The letter is R, and get cracking.
Hermione: But Professor, we need another player. It just wouldn't be right without Malfoy!
(Snape is sitting in Drew's seat and is petting Drew absentmindedly.)
Snape: Fine. I'll take his place. (He stands up and considers throwing Drew at Ron, but thinks better of it. But that would be his first and last good deed of the day.)
Harry: Who goes first?
Snape: Well, considering you're the "celebrity" here, why don't you, Mr. Potter?
Harry: But I went last time!
Snape: (Sighing) Fine. Miss Granger? Would you do us the honors?
Hermione: But of course.
Snape: Go. We have sixty seconds.
Ron: HOLD ON! What are we supposed to be acting out?
Snape: Pretend I'm about to kill you!
Ron: Oh, that shouldn't be too hard.
Hermione: May I start now?
(Snape slaps himself on the forehead.)
Snape: PLEASE!
Hermione: Ron! You shouldn't have added that last bit of Mandrake root.
Ron: Sorry, Hermione, but I thought you said you wanted an aphrodisiac!
Harry: Thanks for giving me bad images, Ron!
Snape: Until you three shut up, I am going to stand here menacingly.
Hermione: Voldemort's behind you, Professor.
(Snape actually turns around.)
Ron: Why did you have to say that name, Hermione?
Harry: Xavier says he liked his wild ride last night, Professor Snape!
(Snape is seething by now.)
Snape: You are expelled from Hogwarts, Mr. Potter.
(Harry gasps.)
Hermione: Zesty, aren't we, Professor?
(Ron gives her a weird look.)
Ron: Actually, he's pretty cruel and malicious if you ask me!
Harry: Buttering up to the teacher, are we, Ron?
Snape: Can't you be quiet for five seconds, Potter, and take a page out of Mr. Weasley's book?
(Ron sticks his tongue out at Harry.)
Hermione: Don't you think this is getting a bit weird?
Ron: Especially since we're being kind of nice to Snape?
Harry: Full of crap, you two are!
Snape: Give it up you three! You suck at this game!
Hermione: Ha! YOU suck!
Ron: I DON'T SUCK!
Harry: Just because you're a Weasley doesn't mean you're always the center of attention! Sheesh!
Snape: Kill! I'll kill you all!
Hermione: Leave me alone! I didn't do anything!
Ron: Man, oh man, is this getting good!
Harry: Nobody likes you, Snape! Get it through your greasy head!
(Snape glares at him.)
Snape: Oh, would you like me to break your wand in half as well as expel you?
(Harry's eyes widen.)
Hermione: Please, Professor! Have mercy on him!
Ron: Quit this game! It's getting too weird!
Snape: THANK MERLIN'S DEFORMED TOES THAT'S OVER!
A/N: Well, that was strange, but you can't blame me for that. Okay, so maybe you could, but it's (looks at clock) 3:56 AM, and I need some sleep. If you like, you could print my story out and use it for target practice. ANOTHER NOTE: I'm so happy I've gotten 15 reviews after two chapters only! That's a surprise for me! Please stay tuned for the next chapter! And don't forget to review and tell me what exactly you liked about this (or didn't like, it doesn't matter)!