A/N: Ok, this is it! Thanks to everyone (especially Shadow Mist) for the great reviews and
support. Please let me know how you liked this story. I always like to hear the good and the
bad. Oh yeah, and I apologize for the sap at the end. It was worse before, trust me.
Epilogue:
The snow disappeared as they drove further and further away from the mountains. It slowly petered out until it became just a gray fringe along the highway, then gave way to dirt and weeds completely. It was like the fading of a dream.
Youji sighed and leaned his face against the cool glass of the passenger side window. The last few weeks had been nice, but now they were coming to an end. It was time for him to stop pretending that he was just another normal guy on a vacation, and return to the cold, hard reality of his life. He snuck a glance at Aya, but the red head stared straight ahead, his brow slightly furrowed as he focused on the road. He had insisted on driving, for no discernible reason. Youji hated being a passenger.
In the back, silence reigned as well. Omi was listening to his headphones and playing a handheld video game with the sound turned off, head nodding slightly in time with the beat. Vaguely, Youji could hear some kind of j-pop. Ken was sleeping with his mouth open, head lolling from side to side around the corners. At this, Youji smiled. Ken fell asleep every time he was in a car, without fail. It was probably why he rode a motorcycle most of the time - self-preservation.
Sighing again, Youji leaned forward, fiddling with the radio dial. Still nothing he wanted to listen to. He shut it off, shooting another sidelong glance at Aya.
"What?"
Oops, caught. "Nothing." He shifted slightly in his seat. "I'm bored," he added.
Aya frowned, but didn't reply.
An ominous, tight feeling settled in Youji's stomach. Aya had been so relaxed and open during their stay at Villa Weiss, but apparently, now that they were going back to Tokyo, that was coming to an end. He caught himself before he sighed for a third time. It had felt like they had made a significant leap forward in their relationship while on this vacation, and Youji didn't want to give that up and go back to how it had been before. They had become much closer, and now Aya was shutting down, closing himself from the outside world again, and Youji was still stuck in the outside world.
"Stop fidgeting." Aya's voice was low.
Without even realizing it, Youji had been tapping his fingers on his legs. He stilled them with a conscious effort. Opening up the glove compartment, the blonde dug around, remembering he had stashed some gum there on an earlier trip. He couldn't smoke in the car and he needed the distraction. Folding a piece into his mouth, he let the sweet peppermint flavor wash over his tongue. "Ne, Aya, let me drive for a while." Anything to stop him from brooding on what he obviously couldn't prevent from happening.
"No."
With a glance at the back seat to make sure his other teammates were still oblivious, Youji decided to tackle the problem head on, since he couldn't seem to distract himself. "What's wrong with you?"
Aya's answer was as curt as ever. "Nothing."
"Well, something's wrong."
"Why does there have to be something wrong?" Aya's knuckles tightened on the steering wheel. "Just leave me alone right now."
"No, I'm not going to leave you alone." Youji ran his hands through his hair in frustration. The feeling in Youji's stomach set up housekeeping and sent an exploratory offshoot to clutch at his heart. "Let's not fight, ok?" he said. "I just don't like it when you shut me out."
Aya shot a quick shocked look in Youji's direction. He opened his mouth as if to say something, but nothing came out.
Youji slumped in the passenger seat, feeling defeated. The silence in the car roared in his ears, stretching out, creating a chasm between them. This was a defining moment, he knew. If the bond they had so recently forged was broken here, there was no way to piece it back together.
A warm hand on his knee startled him. Aya was looking straight out at the road, lips compressed together. "I'm sorry," he said finally.
Aya's hand banished the cold feeling that had settled in Youji's gut. "It's all right," he said, covering his lover's hand with his own. And somehow, it was.
fin
Epilogue:
The snow disappeared as they drove further and further away from the mountains. It slowly petered out until it became just a gray fringe along the highway, then gave way to dirt and weeds completely. It was like the fading of a dream.
Youji sighed and leaned his face against the cool glass of the passenger side window. The last few weeks had been nice, but now they were coming to an end. It was time for him to stop pretending that he was just another normal guy on a vacation, and return to the cold, hard reality of his life. He snuck a glance at Aya, but the red head stared straight ahead, his brow slightly furrowed as he focused on the road. He had insisted on driving, for no discernible reason. Youji hated being a passenger.
In the back, silence reigned as well. Omi was listening to his headphones and playing a handheld video game with the sound turned off, head nodding slightly in time with the beat. Vaguely, Youji could hear some kind of j-pop. Ken was sleeping with his mouth open, head lolling from side to side around the corners. At this, Youji smiled. Ken fell asleep every time he was in a car, without fail. It was probably why he rode a motorcycle most of the time - self-preservation.
Sighing again, Youji leaned forward, fiddling with the radio dial. Still nothing he wanted to listen to. He shut it off, shooting another sidelong glance at Aya.
"What?"
Oops, caught. "Nothing." He shifted slightly in his seat. "I'm bored," he added.
Aya frowned, but didn't reply.
An ominous, tight feeling settled in Youji's stomach. Aya had been so relaxed and open during their stay at Villa Weiss, but apparently, now that they were going back to Tokyo, that was coming to an end. He caught himself before he sighed for a third time. It had felt like they had made a significant leap forward in their relationship while on this vacation, and Youji didn't want to give that up and go back to how it had been before. They had become much closer, and now Aya was shutting down, closing himself from the outside world again, and Youji was still stuck in the outside world.
"Stop fidgeting." Aya's voice was low.
Without even realizing it, Youji had been tapping his fingers on his legs. He stilled them with a conscious effort. Opening up the glove compartment, the blonde dug around, remembering he had stashed some gum there on an earlier trip. He couldn't smoke in the car and he needed the distraction. Folding a piece into his mouth, he let the sweet peppermint flavor wash over his tongue. "Ne, Aya, let me drive for a while." Anything to stop him from brooding on what he obviously couldn't prevent from happening.
"No."
With a glance at the back seat to make sure his other teammates were still oblivious, Youji decided to tackle the problem head on, since he couldn't seem to distract himself. "What's wrong with you?"
Aya's answer was as curt as ever. "Nothing."
"Well, something's wrong."
"Why does there have to be something wrong?" Aya's knuckles tightened on the steering wheel. "Just leave me alone right now."
"No, I'm not going to leave you alone." Youji ran his hands through his hair in frustration. The feeling in Youji's stomach set up housekeeping and sent an exploratory offshoot to clutch at his heart. "Let's not fight, ok?" he said. "I just don't like it when you shut me out."
Aya shot a quick shocked look in Youji's direction. He opened his mouth as if to say something, but nothing came out.
Youji slumped in the passenger seat, feeling defeated. The silence in the car roared in his ears, stretching out, creating a chasm between them. This was a defining moment, he knew. If the bond they had so recently forged was broken here, there was no way to piece it back together.
A warm hand on his knee startled him. Aya was looking straight out at the road, lips compressed together. "I'm sorry," he said finally.
Aya's hand banished the cold feeling that had settled in Youji's gut. "It's all right," he said, covering his lover's hand with his own. And somehow, it was.
fin