Chapter 1 - Cries in the Night
Lex woke to a small cry.
He rolled onto his side, blinking at the clock. It was a little after 11. He had been asleep for less than a half an hour. Julian had gone to bed more than two hours ago. And their dad…
Lex shot up out of bed and hurried down the hall to Julian's room. He threw open the door as silently as he could and flipped on the light.
Julian was sitting up in bed, arms wrapped around his knees, tears streaming down all over his face.
"What do you think you're doing?" Lex asked under his breath.
"I'm scared," Julian whispered.
"You know better than to cry."
"I can't help it! Dad took my night light, and I had a bad dream."
Lex sighed heavily, running a hand down his face. "You're five. Dad says that's old enough to sleep without a nightlight."
"Just cause you're not scared of anything!"
"I'm…" Lex stopped himself before making any confessions. It wouldn't help. "Julian, we've talked about this. You can't cry at night. Dad will come in and give you something to cry about."
"Well, I can't sleep." He lay down his head, his curly red hair falling over his knees.
"Then cry quietly. Don't let anyone hear you."
"But I'm scared!"
Lex rubbed his temples. He opened the door of Julian's room just a crack, enough to see out into the hallway. He didn't see anything, and he didn't hear anyone coming.
He would have to take the risk. "Lay down," he said.
Julian's wide green eyes fixed on Lex. "What if I have a nightmare again?"
"Just lay down."
Julian pouted and obeyed, struggling to pull the twisted covers up over himself.
Lex took the covers away altogether and laid them out again. "Comfortable?"
"Yeah. Can you get me my nightlight?"
"No." It wasn't safe. Even if he managed to get him the night light today, and remembered to take it back before his Dad woke up the next morning, he couldn't keep that up long-term. Julian would have to learn to sleep without it. He had been for a little while, but some nights were harder than others.
"Can you stay with me?"
"Just for a little while." Lex flicked off the light. It wasn't so dark he couldn't see it all – there was enough moonlight coming in through the window – but it was pretty dark. "Not so bad. You can still see."
"Yeah, a little tiny bit. It's kind of scarier."
"I could see if we could get you black out curtains."
"No!"
"Fine," Lex said. He pulled back the covers a little and crawled into bed with his brother. "Come here."
"Yay." Julian happily snuggled into his arms.
"Better?"
"Yeah." He gripped onto the front of Lex's night shirt with one hand.
"OK. Straight off to sleep."
"You can't tell me a story?"
"No, it's after 11."
"Not even a short story?"
"Julian, go to sleep."
"Not even a teeny tiny itty-bitty story?"
Lex groaned. "If I tell you one story, do you promise to go to sleep?"
"I promise."
"OK. One story."
Julian was silent.
Lex took a deep breath. "Once upon a time, there lived a family of ducks."
"Oh, this one!" Julian squirmed excitedly.
"A mother duck, and all of her baby ducks. All of the baby ducks looked the same, small and soft and yellow, except one, which looked different from all the other ones."
"Because he was actually a swan!"
Lex raised his eyebrows. "Are you going to let me tell the story?"
"Yeah! Sorry!" Julian said, but he whispered, "He was a swan."
"The other one was bigger, and gray, and scruffy. All of his brothers and sisters would laugh at him and mock him."
"Yeah! They called him the ugly duckling."
"That's right. They excluded him from their games and activities, and they told him to get out, because he was different. And this made him very angry."
"So mean," Julian agreed.
"And so the ugly duckling swore he would get his revenge on his brothers and sisters. He planned carefully. He studied tactical strategy. And he grew and grew, until he was several times the size of any of his siblings or his parents, and far more beautiful and more graceful."
"Because he was a swan!"
"Because he was a swan."
"I knew it."
"He joined forces with other swans who were sympathetic to his plight, and one by one, they took out the duck family who had ostracized him in his childhood. They started first by hunting down his father, who had abandoned the nest before the swan was hatched, and using him as an example. He took out his siblings one by one. And he saved his mother for last, because she had done nothing to protect him from the rest of his family, and he considered her as guilty as the rest."
"And then after he took them out, he forgave them and made friends with them again?"
Lex blinked. He had told this story quite a few times—it was one of his father's favorites—and Julian had never added that. "What do you think it means to take someone out?"
"Like, take them out of their house?"
Lex breathed in to correct Julian, but at the last moment, he just said, "Yes. Uh. He took the ducks out of their house, and he… told them how he was really feeling, and…"
"And they saw how beautiful he was and they wanted to be friends with him again."
"They… Yeah. Sure."
"Then they all lived happily ever after?"
"You bet."
Julian sighed contentedly. "I like that story."
Lex didn't comment. "OK, off to sleep."
"But…"
"You promised, Julian."
"Hug and kiss?"
Lex pulled him in a little tighter for a moment, resting his cheek against his brother's soft, fluffy hair—he was jealous of it every day—and then brushed it aside to kiss Julian on the forehead. Julian reached up to kiss him on the cheek.
"Night," Julian said sleepily.
"Love you, kid," Lex said.
"Love you too." Julian rolled onto his stomach.
Lex absently rubbed his little back, feeling Julian's muscles relax. He debated every day whether he should tell Julian the whole truth. The real reason why Lex had to hold him at arm's length, treat him coldly, sometimes even be mean to him around Dad. As bad as things were now, he couldn't imagine what it would be like if their dad knew that his sick plan of turning his sons against each other was failing so miserably.
He knew Julian didn't know the difference. The only people he interacted with on a regular basis were his father, who was downright cruel; his servants, who were distant; his tutors, who were overly strict; and Lex. Julian must've found his brother to be as soft and kind as he could imagine, by comparison.
It wasn't fair that he should have lost his mother so young. Lex still remembered the way his mom was with him when he was Julian's age. She had been so gentle, so nurturing. Firm when she had to be, but incredibly patient. He missed her every day.
Julian needed her, not his brother. Lex was half convinced he was making things worse. And if his dad ever found out about the relationship between them, things really would get worse. Lex knew he should keep his distance. It was the best way to protect his little brother.
But despite what his mother had tried to teach him, his father's influence and genetics dominated. Lex was not selfless. He was putting Julian at risk instead.
When he was sure Julian's breathing had evened out, he withdrew his hand and carefully untangled himself from the blankets, then he crept back to his own room. He had to stop doing this. He had to mind his own business and stop coddling his brother.
...Maybe when Julian was a little older.
A/N: Always love hearing your thoughts!